Homesuck: Vriska Rising

[POS Industries]

Get ye to the homestuck thread and never again let your face darken my door.
How can anyone do that when the older, non-Vriska-centric Homestuck thread has been closed due to its inferiority?

[Flarecobra]

More to the point, we don't take kindly to necromancy around these parts, and an entire thread dedicated to it is just absurd. Take a week off while you think about your future as a contributing member of this community.

So you're being classist agenst necromancers now Loyal? For SHAME.

Is it an official NPF thread now?

[Loyal]

Some of my best friends are necromancers.

[Krylo]

How can anyone do that when the older, non-Vriska-centric Homestuck thread has been closed due to its inferiority?

By not posting about Homestuck.

[POS Industries]

By not posting about Homestuck.
Clearly, that's not an option.

[Satan's Onion]

The thread has been successfully Stuck.
.

[Red Mage Black]

Two panels.... just two panels. I give up, Hussie. Your fans have obviously put out more fan-related stuff then you have actual story. I. Give. Up. They can obviously put up with more of your bullshit antics then I can.

[Revising Ocelot]

Where's Synk? I need those mod powers now.

[akaSM]

inb4 everyone here gets banned ::V:

[POS Industries]

Where's Synk? I need those mod powers now.
Nobody's gonna make you a mod because we all know you'd immediately ban yourself.

Modhood is only bestowed to increase suffering, not decrease it.

[Karrrrrrrrrrrresche]

Two panels.... just two panels. I give up, Hussie. Your fans have obviously put out more fan-related stuff then you have actual story. I. Give. Up. They can obviously put up with more of your bullshit antics then I can.

I too am entirely shocked that thousands of people are capable of producing more content than a single person.

[Amake]

Well let's not forget this is Andrew Hussie we're talking about. He's proven he can put out more work than literally several thousand dedicated webcomic artists combined.

I miss those days. >_>

[Karrrrrrrrrrrresche]

But seriously there was like 32 days in a row of five pages per day, plus the most important thing ever:
http://www.mspaintadventures.com/sweetbroandhellajeff/?cid=045.jpg

[Revising Ocelot]

Nobody's gonna make you a mod because we all know you'd immediately ban yourself.

What? No. The new thing is for me to make everyone else a mod and hope one person in the writhing morass bans me. Nobody would notice the driveby on this thread.

[POS Industries]

What? No. The new thing is for me to make everyone else a mod and hope one person in the writhing morass bans me. Nobody would notice the driveby on this thread.
That's pretty brilliant, I wish I'd thought of it.

But then I would have missed the Homestuck thread's glorious death and rebirth into its god tier Vriskanity.

[Flarecobra]

Isn't there something that makes someone unbannable?

[Premmy]

Isn't there something that makes someone unbannable?

Vriskanity

[Flarecobra]

And you know, Vriska's first physical appearance was July 10.... Perhaps that can be Vriska Day?

[Bard The 5th LW]

Stopping the last thread at 1300 pages was a bad idea. A curse has been cast upon this forum, and only the blood of an innocent can lift the dark pall from our midst.

[Karrrrrrrrrrrresche]

Fuck yeah Dirk.

[Arhra]

Dirk, you're a cool kid. So edgy.

[Loyal]

Direct and to the point. That's the Dirk we've all come to know.

Not sure whether Shang Tsung or (castlevania) Dracula would be the more apt comparison here.

[Flarecobra]

Dirk went full Palpatine.

[mauve]

Holy shit. So apparently that's a thing that Dirk can do now.

Rad.


Somehow I doubt it'll work, but it's still rad.

[Aldurin]

I'm down with soul-ripping powers. Especially on the new resident fuck-this-character.

[Bard The 5th LW]

Thug life, Dirk.

[Dracorion]

Good lord that was almost cute and makes me feel like shipping.

[Flarecobra]

Well... I actually feel for Vriska... Guess it might be because I got some idea as to how it's like to be ditched like that.

[Loyal]

I think the real accomplishment of note is that Meenah is bringing some facsimile of order to the tangled, ponderous wellspring of chaos that is Vriska's Hair.

[Aldurin]

Looks like Hussie can't abstain from killing off characters anymore.

[Arcanum]

Well it's not a very heroic or just death so he should be fine. And since Aranea has plots for Jake then he'll have luck pushing the clock in his favor as well.

[POS Industries]

I'm more concerned about how the scene is pretty obviously building to Aranea losing control of Gamzee as soon as Dirk finishes his whole Shang Tsung routine and how that's probably not going to fare well for Terezi.

[Arcanum]

Yeeeahhh...

Yeah :(

[Karrrrrrrrrrrresche]

I'm not so sure it will end badly for Terezi, Gamzee seems pretty on the ball about who has been controlling him and who is therefore responsible for what happened to him here.
It could go either way, but I'm leaning toward him continuing to ignore Terezi and immediately charging off to go knock Aranea back into unlife.

[POS Industries]

I'm mostly just concerned for Terezi since the whole fight has had her screaming at him to fight back, eventually showing exactly why he wasn't fighting back while she was, and then going to Aranea almost completely having her soul ripped out by Dirk. It's pretty much beating the reader over the head with "he is going to start fighting back as soon as this happens."

That said, it's Hussie and all he does anymore is write disappointing twist resolutions to every scenario so the odds of it going exactly like you say aren't exactly low.

[Locke cole]

With Jake fading fast, Aranea's not going to vanish any time soon, so Gamzee will remain mind controlled.

He will die as he lived; denying us closure.

[POS Industries]

He will diecontinue living as he lived; denying us closure.
Fixed that for you.

[Odjn]

Uh oh.

[Revising Ocelot]

Go for the eyes, Boo!

[Loyal]

Probably the closest thing to legitimately frightening Gamzee's ever been.

[Locke cole]

Since he turned the meteor into a slasher flick, anyway.

[Aldurin]

Clown suplex

[Flarecobra]

Someone needs to do the Windy Thing again.

[Loyal]

Since he turned the meteor into a slasher flick, anyway.

No, no, I was including that.

[Dracorion]

Preeeeetty sure she's dead. She's falling into a pool of cherry red liquid.

[mauve]

Sure is awesome how all the characters I give a shit about fail/get killed/don't do anything important because they're not Gamzee or a Serket.

That said, part of me hopes this somehow ends with Terezi becoming God Tier. It's not very likely, but neither were several of the other God Tier ascensions.

It's also super awesome how all the big action occurs in broken stardust graphics so we can't really even see what's going on.

[Revising Ocelot]

Jake seems to be brain-dead, at least. Which is better than nothing.


Brain-deader, to be more accurate.

[POS Industries]

Sure is awesome how all the characters I give a shit about fail/get killed/don't do anything important because they're not Gamzee or a Serket.
Or any form of Dirk, don't forget that.

Dirk only ever loses because somebody else screwed up.

[Odjn]

Even if Karkat finally learns how to use his blood powers, he'll not be able to kill Gamzee because lolclownscan'tdie!!!!.

[Aldurin]

Even if Karkat finally learns how to use his blood powers, he'll not be able to kill Gamzee because lolclownscan'tdie!!!!.

No, if anything Hussie will make sure Gamzee dies here in order to screw with us, since we have confirmation of him being alive later(?) on when he acts as the indestructible tutorial NPC for Caliborn.

[Flarecobra]

And he probably cloned himself or something.

[Arhra]

Damnit Rose! While you're sitting around bemoaning being a bad auspistice, you're being an even worse friend!

And friendship is all that really matters.

[Flarecobra]

And the biggest shit has just hit the biggest fan.

[Menarker]

Doesn't one of those clouds look like the two God-Dogs are taking Jade's inert body to the Ascension Tower? Is it even possible for the quest bed to be used multiple times? Otherwise, I wonder the purpose of them heading over there... (http://www.mspaintadventures.com/?s=6&p=008726)

[Arcanum]

Well Jack knows it worked once, so it could be a vain attempt to try again.

Or, since Jack is a construct of the game (for lack of a better term), and we know he has an inherent knowledge of various mechanics (such as revival via questbed), it could be he inherently knows it will work a second time.

[Aldurin]

It'll be even better if it works, even if the quest bed features the wrong symbol, granting Jade another category of powers.

[Karrrrrrrrrrrresche]

SO
good news I guess? Hussie is going on hiatus until he has completed the story, whereby he will upload it all at once.
The end is somewhat who knows how far away it really is nigh.

[POS Industries]

SO
good news I guess? Hussie is going on hiatus until he has completed the story, whereby he will upload it all at once.
The end is somewhat who knows how far away it really is nigh.
So what you're saying is that this was the last Homestuck update ever.

[Revising Ocelot]

What I expect to see is Hussie start a new comic next year and use the "When it's done!" treatment on Homestuck.

[mauve]

So... does this mean the story is close to an end? Cuz I mean, it seems like a lot of plots have yet to be resolved.

Just off the top of my head: Caliborn and Calliope are still... doing whatever it is they're doing without resolving their issues. Dead(?) Jade is still chilling in deaddreamland with her. Jake hasn't written any of his letters to Jade, nor has he sent her Eridan's rifle yet. Unless I've forgotten (which is highly likely) we still don't know what the deal is with Gamzee's God Tier suit. The Carapace adventures seem to have ended by killing half of them off and then giving PM a bunch of powers she hasn't really used much yet (especially disappointing since she's currently doing nothing besides chasing a cat). There's a whole slew of Alpha Trolls who've been introduced and then completely forgotten. There was that whole Troll Jegus thing that has yet to manifest itself in any meaningful way (although I assume Karkat will have some major role in the finale, since he's Reborn Troll Jegus and he hasn't had a single victory in his personal storyline aside from Shoosh-Pap.) Lord English, Doc Scratch, and Alpha Aradia are still off doing something, somewhere. There's a crap-ton of ghost trolls milling around in dreambubbles, and we've only really heard from Vriska and Meenah recently. I don't remember there ever being any real conclusion to the Midnight Crew stuff with Snowman and company, although I might have forgotten. Li'l Seb and every other version of the bunny have yet to reveal a purpose to their existance. We don't know Jasper's secret (I think??). Roxy has a spare matriorb lying around somewhere. We haven't heard from Tavros, Fefeta, one of the Daves, and Sollux since the troll ghost pirate party. We haven't heard from Eridan since he died (isn't he a ghost like everyone else?). Dad is still on Derse, I THINK. I don't remember what happened to Bro and Mom (Did she die?). In-Comic Hussie is still dead and Ms. Paint hasn't been seen in a while.

And that's just the few I can think of off the top of my head. I wonder how much of this Hussie plans to address, and how far away from the actual ending we really are at this point? And how much do you want to bet that Vriska will somehow perma-die as the biggest heroine of the story?

[Loyal]

But where will I get my dailyweekly dose of snark-bait now?

[POS Industries]

So... does this mean the story is close to an end? Cuz I mean, it seems like a lot of plots have yet to be resolved.

Just off the top of my head: Caliborn and Calliope are still... doing whatever it is they're doing without resolving their issues. Dead(?) Jade is still chilling in deaddreamland with her. Jake hasn't written any of his letters to Jade, nor has he sent her Eridan's rifle yet. Unless I've forgotten (which is highly likely) we still don't know what the deal is with Gamzee's God Tier suit. The Carapace adventures seem to have ended by killing half of them off and then giving PM a bunch of powers she hasn't really used much yet (especially disappointing since she's currently doing nothing besides chasing a cat). There's a whole slew of Alpha Trolls who've been introduced and then completely forgotten. There was that whole Troll Jegus thing that has yet to manifest itself in any meaningful way (although I assume Karkat will have some major role in the finale, since he's Reborn Troll Jegus and he hasn't had a single victory in his personal storyline aside from Shoosh-Pap.) Lord English, Doc Scratch, and Alpha Aradia are still off doing something, somewhere. There's a crap-ton of ghost trolls milling around in dreambubbles, and we've only really heard from Vriska and Meenah recently. I don't remember there ever being any real conclusion to the Midnight Crew stuff with Snowman and company, although I might have forgotten. Li'l Seb and every other version of the bunny have yet to reveal a purpose to their existance. We don't know Jasper's secret (I think??). Roxy has a spare matriorb lying around somewhere. We haven't heard from Tavros, Fefeta, one of the Daves, and Sollux since the troll ghost pirate party. We haven't heard from Eridan since he died (isn't he a ghost like everyone else?). Dad is still on Derse, I THINK. I don't remember what happened to Bro and Mom (Did she die?). In-Comic Hussie is still dead and Ms. Paint hasn't been seen in a while.

And that's just the few I can think of off the top of my head. I wonder how much of this Hussie plans to address, and how far away from the actual ending we really are at this point? And how much do you want to bet that Vriska will somehow perma-die as the biggest heroine of the story?
I can clear up some of those, at least.

Jake had already written the letters to Jade ending with transportalizing the bunny (http://www.mspaintadventures.com/?s=6&p=006926) to her so she could give it to John. However, the weapons that he received from (presumedly) Jade in the time capsule (http://www.mspaintadventures.com/?s=6&p=006922), which included Ahab's Crosshairs, have not been put in the time capsule and sent back yet. So that part does need to be resolved.

The Midnight Crew arc has been mostly resolved with everyone in that universe except for Spades Slick dying after he shot Snowman. Spades was the only one to escape through Hussie's fifth wall window, and only barely so.

Jasper's secret was apparently a subconscious implantation of the MEOW code into Rose's mind, which translated into the GCAT code needed to create Becquerel.

Eridan is still fused with Sollux within Jake's sprite. Dear sweet Fefeta exploded and went back to being dead Feferi and Nepeta, who are part of Vriska and Meenah's ghost crew.

Everything else is still something that's either yet to be resolved or has been completely abandoned.

[Loyal]

The living Aradia was last seen hanging with Vriska and Meenah.

[Aldurin]

Aaaaand Homestuck is over, everyone can go home now. (http://www.mspaintadventures.com/sweetbroandhellajeff/?cid=047.jpg)

[Aldurin]

Since Hussie forgot that time works normally in the real world and the megapause wasn't done in time for April 13th, he created something . . . different.

Paradox Space (http://www.paradoxspace.com/), the auto-canonizing fanfiction dumping ground (no wait, come back! I just worded that a bit crudely). Basically a growing collaboration of artists and writers making various homestuckverse stories with that are canon in the sense that they are lore-expanders or filler episodes. So far there's only a short thing from the Paranatural creator, but more is supposed to come. Hussie says he'll probably throw something of his own in there sometimes, but he clearly intends this to be a fan-driven effort.

I'm not sure how well this will go, but it's probably worth keeping an eye on in case anyone manages to post every possible shipping combination of erotica.

Gotta get that ARquiussprite X Diamonds Droog X Con Air Poster action in somewhere.

[Flarecobra]

I think he knew how time works just fine, judging from his post back in January when he posted this:

"Um, no, sorry. I still have no time estimate, or specific date I am shooting for. 4/13 would be the COOLEST date to shoot for, right? I doubt that's realistic though."

Thus I think he knew everything wouldn't be finishing in time for his 5th anniversary.

[POS Industries]

My favorite part is how Homestuck already ended and we're all pretending it hasn't.

[Revising Ocelot]

Not quite all.

Can't explain those people who imagine strange things like Homestuck ending, or Half-Life 3, or The Last Guardian. Attempts to maintain such false hope merely lead myself into headbutting walls, trying to infect them with The Ginger.

[Solid Snake]

Man, I remember all those months back when I predicted that Hussie was going to find ways to stretch out Homestuck as a money-making property before ever committing to finishing it.

The funny thing about Paradox Space is that its very existence reveals a possible solution to Andrew's conundrum regarding finishing Homestuck, insofar as instead of bringing in new artists for spinoff bullshit he could've just brought in new artists to, you know, help him finish Homestuck. Like, if it's that big a challenge to handle all the remaining content alone, don't do it alone? It's not as if there's ever been a precedent that only Andrew could draw things there.

But no instead he's obviously going to go this route, because there's a lot more money to be made if Homestuck is still a relevant, ongoing, neverending thing sin 2016

[Locke cole]

Solid Snake!

[Bard The 5th LW]

I can't really envision Hussie milking THAT MUCH cash out of a series that hasn't been updated in 6 months, merchandizing aside. Like, the dude's obviously bad with time, but I envision actually ending, call me an optimist. I'm pretty interested in seeing what the game will look like too.

[POS Industries]

I still don't really think the ever increasing probability of Homestuck never getting another update is a milking of the series' financial potential as much as it is that Hussie just has a bunch of other shit to work on that he actually DOES get paid for, on top of the fact that I'm not entirely convinced that even he knows where he wants to go with the story and that none of the current plot threads are even close to any sort of satisfying resolution.

To bring the story to a proper ending would require far too much work to be wrapped up in a single update like he's been claiming he'll do, so it will either be a year or two down the road that we'd get the rest of the story dropped on us that would take at least a week to read through on a binge or it will be a rushed piece of garbage that will ruin what's left of whatever goodwill the first four acts might have bought from the readers.

It's just better to presume the comic's stopped forever than expect either likely outcome.

"Paradox Space" is totally a cash in to keep the franchise running and maintain interest in hoodies and calenders or whatever, though.

[Loyal]

on top of the fact that I'm not entirely convinced that even he knows where he wants to go with the story and that none of the current plot threads are even close to any sort of satisfying resolution.Yeah, when he first announced the hiatus and the fact that the final, mega-update would resolve everything in the story in one go, you immediately knew that's some first-class bullshit.

Insofar as I'm thinking about Homestuck at all these days (there isn't even anything entertaining coming out of the fandom anymore), I'm half expecting a feature-length film that somehow doubles the number of plot threads lying around.

[Locke cole]

When it was announced that the next update would be the last, I made two assumptions. First, that the update will dwarf everything else in the comic in sheer size (and cause that entire sector of the internet to break for at least a week from the traffic), and that it will, consequently, take so long to come out that I'll have forgotten what updates were like by the time it does.

So I've just been pursuing other things in the time since then. I'll come back to Homestuck when the game comes out, or when I hear a great wailing and gnashing of teeth to signify the ending update.

[Overcast]

I've had about the same reaction, I'm not nearly so cynical, but then it helps that I decided to stop reading Homestuck until it was finished like three years ago. I made the choice at the time of the megapause to catch up and resumed my earlier concept like nothing happened. So this all seems about average to me.

[Bard The 5th LW]

I think Hussie's biggest mistake was the Alpha kids/trolls. While some of them were certainly interesting in their own right, adding 16+ characters, even if the majority of them were in the background, was just an over-complication that a story like Homestuck didn't need. It took away from time that more interesting characters should have had and definitely made it impossible for Hussie to wrap the plot up in a SATISFYING way, yeah. Act 6 was a screw-up on the whole.

[POS Industries]

After the timeskip, I think the damage was already done. Nearly doubling the cast certainly didn't help, but breezing past three years of development for the original main characters (they certainly aren't the main characters anymore) and having them emerge largely unrecognizable in personality crippled the comic pretty badly.

[Loyal]

Out of all the ancestor characters, the only ones who actually contributed to the overall narrative didn't even add that much. Jane and Meenah are just proxies for the Condesce's character development. Aranea simply threw additional conflicts on top of an already existing overabundance thereof. Kurloz helped provide supplies to a character who already had a demonstrable ability to be wherever he wanted to be with anything he needed to have.

[POS Industries]

Also Dirk has consistently been a gigantic mary sue that keeps having to jump in and quickly do something to move the plot along when Hussie ends up painting himself in a corner while writing everyone else's pointless bullshit.

[Locke cole]

I was okay with act 6.

I think.

It's been so long.

[rpgdemon]

When it was announced that the next update would be the last, I made two assumptions. First, that the update will dwarf everything else in the comic in sheer size (and cause that entire sector of the internet to break for at least a week from the traffic), and that it will, consequently, take so long to come out that I'll have forgotten what updates were like by the time it does.

So I've just been pursuing other things in the time since then. I'll come back to Homestuck when the game comes out, or when I hear a great wailing and gnashing of teeth to signify the ending update.

Yeah, I don't know where all the cynicism is coming from. "Never going to get an update again"? Really?

It was clear, given how much needs to be tied up, there's going to be a lot of panels that need to be done before it updates. So, it's going to take awhile. The fact that it's taking so long means that he's probably actually tying them up, not that it'll never update again.

[Locke cole]

Yeah, I don't know where all the cynicism is coming from. "Never going to get an update again"? Really?

Wait, are you saying this in solidarity with me, or to admonish me?

[rpgdemon]

Wait, are you saying this in solidarity with me, or to admonish me?

In solidarity with.

[Loyal]

Also Dirk has consistently been a gigantic mary sue that keeps having to jump in and quickly do something to move the plot along when Hussie ends up painting himself in a corner while writing everyone else's pointless bullshit.

Riiiight up until he got ignominiously Worfed by Aranea so that, in her sudden yet inevitable betrayal, the newly revived Ghost Girl could establish herself as a credible threat amongst ever-escalating tiers of power after sitting on her ass/own hot air for untold aeons.

Also forgot: though not ancestors, Caliborn provides the audience with a completely unnecessary and unsolicited origin story when he's not providing a vehicle for the author to see just how progressively depraved he can make someone while still keeping its fanbase. Calliope serves no purpose except as a disposable vector for said depravity before stepping aside to reveal the True Secret Final Weapon That Will Surely Resolve The Plot, towards whom we have utterly no leads except wishful thinking.

[Locke cole]

Dirk got Worf'd by Jade. It was a mind-projection of Jake's in the form of Dirk that got Worf'd by Aranea.

Well, I say Worf'd by Aranea. It was more of a sudden existence failure when Jane temporarily killed Jake in the middle of "Dirk"'s attack.

...how did i remember all that

[Overcast]

Cause technically it didn't happen long ago. As my brain has compressed this media project serially in an attempt not to allow it to get overburdened nor for me to take it so seriously that I have a cynical self destruction I have found nothing particularly troubling in the developments or the overabundance of characters. Mostly because even for the small second Aranea was worth caring about I didn't care about her. I was against the introduction of the Trolls as some people may note from an eternity ago, so as it grew I just faded more. I was oddly very positive about the human ancestors, because I like the human dualities a bit. And I responded with absolute fine-ness to the persona shifts that occurred during the time in flux.

Though I'll note I did pretty much barely pay attention for Caliborn moments, save for the fact that I am hoping that one mystery more can be clarified in the narrator that helped him along with in the megaupdate potential to come. That was a hook that interested me. And honestly unless he says so I am still totally on board that a megaupdate will occur. Mostly because mentally the series is in stasis until it does and I don't even look at it unless a post happens here.

You bastards.

[POS Industries]

Dirk got Worf'd by Jade.
It was a necessary jobbing so that Dirk could start spending the next couple years flying to the site of the battle like Goku while the others fight a battle they can't win on Namek so he can arrive just in time to save them.

[Locke cole]

He hasn't become any more effective against Jade in that time, though. He's been in transit the whole time.

It's like as if Goku had to spend a full year flying back to Earth after dying in battle with Raditz, but Raditz was still around and Goku didn't get any training from King Kai in the intervening time.

[POS Industries]

I dunno, I think he could probably wail on Jade's broken corpse pretty effectively.

It's like a 10-0 matchup in his favor ATM.

[Locke cole]

...So... someone else sorted things out while he was in transit.

Martiest of Stus!

[POS Industries]

If getting forcefully teleported by Jade were the biggest concern instead of a narrative convenience, you'd have a point.

Also even without the real Dirk around, a fake Dirk was still there to nearly defeat Aranea until Jake was knocked out. Because the only person that accomplishes anything right now is some form of Dirk.

[Locke cole]

If getting forcefully teleported by Jade were the biggest concern instead of a narrative convenience, you'd have a point.

Also even without the real Dirk around, a fake Dirk was still there to nearly defeat Aranea until Jake was knocked out. Because the only person that accomplishes anything right now is some form of Dirk.

A thought-projection powered by Jake in the shape of Dirk, anyway. Goes to show just how powerful Hope can be.

[Karrrrrrrrrrrresche]

UPD8

I MEAN
ITS A TOTAL BULLSHIT UPDATE
BUT ITS AN UPD8

[POS Industries]

Ah yes, the long-overdue Error 503 Service Unavailable update. I've been waiting to see where that plot thread was leading.

[Revising Ocelot]

I'd need a whole lot of meditation (Gurus being optional) and reread the last act or two. I do not have enough brain meats to be able to store HS stuff for a whole year, it has to make way for other things. Cheap parents should have got me a larger Solid State Brain when I was born, humph.

[Aldurin]

Ah yes, the long-overdue Error 503 Service Unavailable update. I've been waiting to see where that plot thread was leading.

I also feel like blaming this update for why the entire internet seems slower today.

That said isn't this thread necro, shouldn't there be a new thread titled "HAMSTERK! Not homestar, the other thing."

[Flarecobra]

Ah yes, the long-overdue Error 503 Service Unavailable update. I've been waiting to see where that plot thread was leading.

Really? I'm getting 500 error code here.

[Karrrrrrrrrrrresche]

That said isn't this thread necro, shouldn't there be a new thread titled "HAMSTERK! Not homestar, the other thing."

Does it upset you that this thread is older than your account on these forums? Is that why you so coldly want to stab it right in the heart?

[rpgdemon]

So, uh, the update seems to be gone now.

[Aldurin]

Does it upset you that this thread is older than your account on these forums? Is that why you so coldly want to stab it right in the heart?

To slay a beast as legendary as that, such an opportunity is rare and should be cherished.

So, uh, the update seems to be gone now.

Yeah. I can still get to the page through my RSS feed but the page is just the same placeholder format as any other iteration of the number in the URL. Either Hussie pulled it or he fucked up and accidentally loaded a backup state of the server.

[Karrrrrrrrrrrresche]

Whatever the case may be, if anyone is interested the single page (Gif) of the update can be found here:
http://stelera.tumblr.com/post/100182833203

[Loyal]

So the happening is uh... rehappening I guess.

Thank you Caliborn for all your hard work.

[Aldurin]

The best part is the deviantart page is legit.

This shrine to the destructive whims of anime is real.

[Flarecobra]

That was....something. I'm not exactly sure what though.

[Solid Snake]

I always knew, deep down inside, that Caliborn shipped Dave and Karkat along with the rest of us.

[Flarecobra]

In the eternal words of Red Mage: It's Thwacky Time!

[Amake]

Oh jeez oh jeez. I'm going to have to dig deep to remember the names of even half of those dead kids.

[Flarecobra]

That's one way to trim down the cast.

So, would you say that Karkat got karkooked?

[POS Industries]

it will be a rushed piece of garbage that will ruin what's left of whatever goodwill the first four acts might have bought
:smug:

[Aldurin]

That's one way to trim down the cast.

Except there's probably a way that some character is going to physically bridge the deadworld to the notdeadworld (I don't even remember most of the Stuckiverse cosmology terms anymore, ok?) and bring everyone back once Hussie realizes that killing off the cast bloat en masse doesn't get whatever result he wanted.

The problem is that character death has been cheapened to the point of being a tiered list of inconveniences that merely impede the character's ability to influence plot-critical/pure-bullshit events. It's not even actually death at that point, but something with less meaning that shares the same name. If a character dies in [brutal show/comic/game with strong characters and definitive permadeath] then the consumer feels the weight that the character is gone, that their beautiful combination of flaws, ambitions and perspectives has been put out like a candle.

In Homestuck, character death is merely conditioning you to eventually "meh" every time someone is "killed".

[Ryong]

So when did Homestuck jump the shark?

I'm going to say it was the beginning of Act 6.

[Revising Ocelot]

Why is everyone stabbing each other? Never mind, I'm going to make overused Doge jokes about Dave.

Wow such sacrifice many teamwork

[Flarecobra]

In Homestuck, character death is merely conditioning you to eventually "meh" every time someone is "killed".

Just like most superhero comics, huh?

[POS Industries]

So when did Homestuck jump the shark?

I'm going to say it was the beginning of Act 6.
I think the general consensus is Act 5. What's usually in dispute is at what specific point in Act 5 did it happen.

Act 6 has just been a trainwreck in general.

[Solid Snake]

Personally, I just find it hysterical that so many devout Homestuck fans waited a whole year and the first update of substance has nearly everyone die.

[rpgdemon]

Am I the only one who liked it?

[Bard The 5th LW]

I'd vote Act 6 is the sharkjump. I suppose Act 5 was TECHNICALLY it if you count cascade. When basically all the characters hit god-tier was probably the big warning signal.

[Amake]

I still have hope. The story has lost momentum, nothing else. Probably the turning point was Hussie deciding to go "fuck it" at serialized storytelling an start writing with the finished story first in mind. Which, yes, makes following the serialized updates step by step less than ideal, but really we've been waiting for Homestuck to be finished so we can read it properly since like act 4.

[Bard The 5th LW]

I will note that I think the overall quality has gone down in the comic, I still enjoy it well enough and I intend on following it for whats left. I just think its a shame that its not as good as it probably could be.

[rpgdemon]

The shark was jumped since the first flash, if you're counting, "Tries to be SUPER COOL and dramatic" as jumping the shark.

It's built up larger, but the tone is still exactly the same. You're just having a hard time taking it seriously now, because teens on tumblr are exploding about how AWESOME AND EPIC everything is.

Like, seriously, every [S] page is the same self-important overly dramatic thing as these bigger ones. They're just shorter, and Hussie was not as good at Flash as he is now. Go back and check them out.

Eg: http://www.mspaintadventures.com/index.php?s=6&p=002565

[Loyal]

Just like most superhero comics, huh?

At least in most superhero comics a character death has the side effect of getting them written out of the story for awhile. Also, usually advances the plot or resolves a story arc in some way.

"How are they gonna get out of this one?" is a question usually reserved for situations like death traps, villains overpowering the hero, or someone in dire need of rescue. Hussie has somehow taken that question and made us ask it of character death. Character death that had special rules designed to highlight its finality, even.

Roxy Rogue of Void’s a bunch of life rings, enters dream bubble, distributes to relevant ghosts.

There, you’re welcome.
via Tumblr: (http://mad-maddie.tumblr.com/post/100893504807/more-roxy-rogue-of-voids-a-bunch-of-life)
The shark was jumped since the first flash, if you're counting, "Tries to be SUPER COOL and dramatic" as jumping the shark.

The shark-jumping moment people are trying to identify is the part where all of the increasingly-WTF-inducing antics had lost all dramatic impact, the plot's momentum had ground to a halt despite the best efforts of the cast members, and the story had accrued more plot threads than could ever be realistically resolved.

If anybody cared about the storytelling being campy and hyperdramatic, you can forget about Homestuck because they would've stopped reading about 2/3 of the way through Problem Sleuth.

[Arcanum]

I don't remember why any of this is happening, but I still enjoyed the flash at least from a visual standpoint.

[Flarecobra]

Had some pretty awesome music though.

[Bard The 5th LW]

I liked the image of Caliborn just lying amongst his broken toys and shit, with his power fantasy sorta torn apart.

[Aldurin]

I liked the image of Caliborn just lying amongst his broken toys and shit, with his power fantasy sorta torn apart.

Apparently it is torn apart, but still alive in its new twisted form. But this already got old long ago.

I'm getting more tempted to remove Homestuck from my RSS feed and read through the rest when I see "Homestuck has finally fucking ended" show up in the news.

[Arcanum]

Well, looks like we're getting Mon/Wed/Fri updates now, so hopefully things will start to happen that aren't frivolous bullshit.

Oh who am I trying to kid.

[Flarecobra]

It was hard to get out with a straight face, huh?

[Locke cole]

I'm glad to see this thread remains a point of stability.

[mauve]

I liked how the flash animation signified the rapid switch between locations by mimicking a switch between the green and white website layouts. I also liked how characters flew in an out of the "boundaries" of the standard Flash canvas (an illusion created by enlarging the actual canvas to simulate the entire front page above the fold). That said, it's been so long since Homestuck updated last that Iforgot about 65% of what was going on pre Caliborn intermission and as a result have no actual frame of reference for what just happened. I've completely forgotten why Alpha Mindfang and the Empress were fighting, I don't remember where all the non-featured trolls/trollghosts/whatever are, and I have only a vague recollection of the weird standoff between Karkat and Super Important Troll Clown.

While I'm sure all the deaths in the movie won't be permanent, they felt rushed. Too many major characters died in rapid succession for there to be any dramatic impact.

Also, I find it strange that Hussie's first update in a year mocks the kids who draw fanart in poor manga styles and make weird fanfiction, yet that population comprises a good chunk of his own fanbase. It seems like insulting the same people you're marketing those lunch boxes, plushies, t-shirts, musical albums and fan-kickstarted game to would be a bad idea. It could be that this jab wasn't aimed at his fans at all, just self-absorbed people who refuse criticism in general, but it could certainly be misinterpreted as such. Maybe I'm just reading too much into it.

[Flarecobra]

Well, a certain someone has mentioned that his favorite jokes are the ones done onto the reader themselves...

[POS Industries]

Yeah, but there's a difference between a joke and just being a dick.

[Solid Snake]

Yeah, but there's a difference between a joke and just being a dick.

I feel like Hussie more or less was always a dick, but pretty much got away with it back when his content was phenomenal, because a lot of creative writers and artists out in the world have dickish personalities and we often just assume it comes with the territory.

But now as Homestuck's become padded out into oblivion and the quality's dipped, the dickishness just sticks out more because there isn't much else left to occupy our thoughts.

And don't get me wrong, artistically speaking, from a purely technical perspective, Andrew's better than he's ever been. No arguments there. Only, this is all kind of proving another point, namely that your skills as an artist can only take you as far as the quality of the content you're drawing. Without a story, all of Andrew's ambitious improvements in animation and all his experimentation in the medium just don't mean much.

There's also only so many times an author can badger me with "THIS IS HOPELESS!" before I shout back "Okay, fine, it's fucking hopeless, but if it really is hopeless, how the fuck do you expect me to care?" Don't get me wrong on that count, the kids and trolls (at least some of them) are destined to "win", but at this rate their victory is going to be such a huge half-assed Deus Ex Machina that even that's no real consolation, because it doesn't feel like character growth so much as it feels like the characters are beaten to a pulp until the arbitrary moment that Andrew christens as "The Ending," when the tables turn so the expected outcome is achieved.

EDIT: I just feel at some point -- well over halfway after the story began, granted, but at some point before the story reached a climax, and really, probably before Act 6 began -- the Kids and Trolls as protagonists should have come up with some sort of Plan, which while unlikely to succeed would at least be consistent enough narratively that there were actual Stakes, and if everyone's goals are well-articulated you know exactly where you stand as a reader and what you're rooting for and what you're rooting against. And I think insofar as Act 5 worked, at least more than Act 6 has, it's because there was a Plan (albeit one that mutated as the situation changed) and there were Stakes because you knew that universe was toast and the Kids needed an exit strategy and everyone needed to join up and meet each other and we wanted that to happen.

But in Act Six, really, has there really been any plans whatsoever, or are the Kids and Trolls simply passive actors repeatedly getting screwed over by forces outside their control? Because the latter just sucks.
It's fun to have compelling, hard-as-fuck to beat antagonists who are capable of wrecking shit up, but the fun in great antagonists also stems from the knowledge that the protagonists retain some agency -- agency to fight back, or agency to cave in, agency to write their own stories in the context of the menace threatening to conquer them.

There's no agency here. There's no plan. There's no stakes.
We're near the end of the story and I don't even have the slightest fucking clue what the Kids and Trolls are hoping to accomplish, and really, at this juncture, the only thing left to root for is for them to stay alive, which has no true meaning anyway because there isn't even any meaningful consequence in death.

[Arcanum]

Yeah, I agree Snake. As for the plan in Act 6, the only one I can remember is "get the MacGuffin so we can beat Lord English" and then John stuck his hand in the MacGuffin. And I think some of them are trying to get Caliborn's sister (whatever her name was) to wake up? But that might've just been Rose and Roxy?

I dunno, it's been a while, and it was never clear to begin with, and a lot of the stuff that's been happening has really just been "oh look stuff is happening" instead of "let's work towards X oh shit now stuff is happening that is impacting how we work towards X."

So anyway, I guess the denizen-named browser icons were actual representations of the denizens instead of just abstractions. Unless those massive serpents turn out to be not the denizens, but to me it seems likely that they are.

[Flarecobra]

By this point, I'm hoping the villain wins, because at least Lord English's motives are clear.

[Locke cole]

Yeah, I'm totally rooting for the guy whose game plan consists of "smash whatever I run into", because I think that's the most compelling character in the story.

Wait, no.

...But, you know, carry on. Whatever I may think of the comic, I know there's no way I'm swaying anyone; I'm not persuasive enough, nor do I really think what I say could overturn how someone reacted to the story in the first place.

[Solid Snake]

...But, you know, carry on. Whatever I may think of the comic, I know there's no way I'm swaying anyone; I'm not persuasive enough, nor do I really think what I say could overturn how someone reacted to the story in the first place.

Honestly like, my one and only criticism of your perspective is that you seem to be taking the criticism a bit to heart personally when, in reality, I completely get why a lot of folks love Homestuck, and still love Homestuck, and will continue to love Homestuck, and even when I'm posting rants about Homestuck here, I'm not trying to convince anyone who still loves Homestuck that they shouldn't love Homestuck, so much as I just want to share my own perspective on why I no longer love Homestuck.

Like, if I never loved Homestuck, and if I was completely unable to appreciate anything about it, I certainly couldn't be bothered to post anything about it now. The fact that a part of me is still hung up on how incredible certain earlier parts of Homestuck were is precisely what motivates my ire, and none of that ire is in any way directed towards people who disagree with me.

[Locke cole]

Yeah, I get that, and I really do need to back off that attention-seekingly pessimistic crap.

It's sort of the result of stuff I've been getting into elsewhere. Too much time and effort spent arguing fruitlessly with people over the internet, which ultimately leads to me simultaneously wanting to weigh in on something and wondering what the point even is in doing so.

So then I blow up and go on a whingeing rant like the one above. And that's something I need to work on.

[Arcanum]

I'm still reading Homestuck for the same reason I'm still reading Naruto and Bleach: I've been doing it for so long that I need to know how this shit ends. At least one of those is almost over.

[POS Industries]

I'm still reading Homestuck for the same reason I'm still reading Naruto and Bleach: I've been doing it for so long that I need to know how this shit ends. At least one of those is almost over.
Yeah, pretty much.

I used to at least look forward to the flash updates, but now I can't even expect those to be any good.

[Aldurin]

The writing has fallen apart, but I am starting to think the biggest mistake was "I should start making the video game RIGHT NOW" in the middle of the tipping point into a clusterfuck. The fanbase momentum has been lost to the point where the people who thought they remembered what's going on are going to be thinking "WHO?" at a good portion of the recent updates. If it wasn't for the Megapause, the general reaction might have been better.

[Amake]

And now the widespread, frantic destruction slows down to show us a small, personal moment where all the ways the dead may be brought back to life is not foremost in the mind of those affected. I'm still thinking it's all going to work in the future when you can read the whole story. Ignoring the context of linear time may still be necessary to enjoy the comic at the moment, of course.

[Bard The 5th LW]

I legitimately have no idea as to what counts as heroic anymore in this story.

[POS Industries]

I legitimately have no idea as to what counts as heroic anymore in this story.
I've honestly never been clear on what counted as just, either.

Like with Vriska, I figured that a just death meant that she'd done enough evil already that being killed on her way to do something actually heroic still meant it was a just death, but then Jade and Jane's deaths were considered just even though they were the victims of mind control while they happened and therefore weren't responsible for any of the evil they'd been party to.

So I think "heroic" and "just" both mean "whatever's most convenient to the narrative."

[Loyal]

John tried to fight Jack Black, got punked so hard it hardly counted as a fight, and came back to life not long after.

Rose tries to fight the Condesce, gets punked so hard it hardly counts as a fight, and dies heroically.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[Bard The 5th LW]

Like, I interpreted a heroic death as being one that is actually a meaningful sacrifice. Like, karat suggests john would have died a heroic death had he tried to bring the tumor to the green sun. But like, rose, jake, and Dave all just sorta died in vane without accomplishing anything (especially rose) so I just really don't get it.

[Solid Snake]

Yeah, I no longer believe there's really any consistent logic behind the Heroic/Just death dichotomy aside from Andrew delaying deaths until the moment he wanted everyone to die.

It's also interesting that the characters remaining include two of my favorite characters (John and Roxy) and my least favorite character (Dirk). Is anyone else even alive? Jade, maybe? I don't even remember that recent flash, which is a bad sign given that it wasn't year-old content or anything.

[Revising Ocelot]

I think Dirk just commited suicide by glitching out of reality, or something. And I think all the trolls are dead except for Terezi and Aradia (anyone remember her? naaaaaaah). Although Terezi might just go and die right now like Rose did.

[Aldurin]

Is anyone else even alive? Jade, maybe? I don't even remember that recent flash, which is a bad sign given that it wasn't year-old content or anything.

This is probably a common problem, as readers like us have to come to terms with the fact that "we remember enough" was actually "wait shit I remember more Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff plot than this what is even going on?" I might actually have to go to the wiki to see what the actual event timeline is.

And to the Heroic/Just discussion, everyone is now a plot puppet. Even John is being literally transposed narratively to patch together this ending. Which feels even worse than the Hussie/Caliborn conversations after they got old.

[rpgdemon]

John tried to fight Jack Black, got punked so hard it hardly counted as a fight, and came back to life not long after.

Rose tries to fight the Condesce, gets punked so hard it hardly counts as a fight, and dies heroically.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

The way I figure it is, John really didn't have a choice but fight Jack. It was more like, "Hey, anyone seen my dad? Oh, shit, Jack is here and he totally just murdered my dad." He wasn't trying to go start a fight with Jack, he just happened to end up in one.

Rose on the other hand specifically wanted to fight the Condesce, and went out of her way to do so.

Though, I think Doc Scratch might have said something like, "The clock is ~mysterious~ and bullshitty and can do what it wants", so the real answer is probably: It's the whim of paradox space. Which has been really clearly established to be the same as: It's the whim of the story. If there is one thing Paradox Space seems to do, it's push the characters into being involved in this story. That's sort of the whole point of the great question or whatever it's called: Do the players have any agency, when Paradox Space is fating them to tell the story it wants?

[Locke cole]

There's actually a newspost up today wherein he goes over his reasoning behind this latest rash of justice/heroism.

He notes that Jade was just barely to one side of it, and that John's and Rose's situations were indeed nearly identical.

[Solid Snake]

I gotta say independently of me being pretty sour about most of these updates I really am exceptionally fond of the John / Roxy pairing as an alternative to the sheer awfulness of John / Vriska, and so I'm glad the two are having bonding time, even if it's bonding as the only survivors in a fucked-up game session.

[mauve]

Kinda off-topic, but was it ever explained what/who John's Dad is?

I mean, Rose's Mom is alt-universe Roxy, Bro is Dirk, Nana is Jane, and Jade's Grandpa Harley is Jake. So was Dad ever explained at all? I honestly don't remember.

[Solid Snake]

Kinda off-topic, but was it ever explained what/who John's Dad is?

I mean, Rose's Mom is alt-universe Roxy, Bro is Dirk, Nana is Jane, and Jade's Grandpa Harley is Jake. So was Dad ever explained at all? I honestly don't remember.

Are you ready to read something extremely confusing? (http://mspaintadventures.wikia.com/wiki/Dad)

[Bard The 5th LW]

Kinda off-topic, but was it ever explained what/who John's Dad is?

I mean, Rose's Mom is alt-universe Roxy, Bro is Dirk, Nana is Jane, and Jade's Grandpa Harley is Jake. So was Dad ever explained at all? I honestly don't remember.

Dad is just the biological son of Nana/Jane with some dude we never had the chance to see in any capacity.

In a weird way, he would biologically be more like John's brother. (Bro, on the flipside, would be Dave's biological father)

[Satan's Onion]

Are you ready to read something extremely confusing? (http://mspaintadventures.wikia.com/wiki/Dad)

Thank you, Snake!

[Ryong]

Wait now I'm lost again.

This is an AU Jade?

[Arcanum]

Yes

[Solid Snake]

I suspect we're building towards a 'solution' to the problem wherein John (and possibly Roxy?) saves everyone by agreeing to some deal with his denizen wherein the AU becomes the new 'prime' universe, and our John joins the alternate universe cast, who all assume he's dead because the other John was executed by the denizen so our John could swap universes or some shit.

If what I typed above is actually true, by the way, it means we just wasted so many fucking Homestuck updates watching a doomed timeline. Why the fuck this whole experience couldn't have been summed up in a mere fraction of the time is utterly beyond me, especially since Hussie himself used that exact appropriate storytelling technique to shorten the narrative back when Terezi tricked John umpteen trillion years ago.

[Premmy]

It could just fast-forward after the universe-hop through John using future knowledge to prevent everything from happening. Basically the inverse of the Terezi/John scenario.

[Solid Snake]

It could just fast-forward after the universe-hop through John using future knowledge to prevent everything from happening. Basically the inverse of the Terezi/John scenario.

Yeah, but my aggravation with that possibility is that we've spent all this time getting to know versions of everyone-who's-not-John who are going to turn out to be irrelevant to the plot, and the 'new' versions of everyone else will be complete strangers. Who knows how differently some of these folks might be in a universe where they all assumed John had died in some freak accident for nearly three years? At the very least, Jade's bound to be a depressed shell of herself, stuck by herself for that time. And assuming there's any communication whatsoever between the traveling groups, everyone else will find out too, which probably won't positively effect Dave, Rose and Karkat.

And I mean, those are the versions of the characters that are ultimately worth getting to know. Just feels like a lot of wasted character development into versions of the characters who even John himself won't be impacted or affected by personally.

[POS Industries]

If what I typed above is actually true, by the way, it means we just wasted so many fucking Homestuck updates watching a doomed timeline.
Three years' worth, in fact.

[Solid Snake]

Has it really been three years since Act 6 began?

[Flarecobra]

And over 5 since it started.

And act 6 started 11/11/11.

[POS Industries]

THREE

HORRIBLE

YEARS

[Aldurin]

And over 5 since it started.

And act 6 started 11/11/11.

So this will end 14/14/14? If we're lucky, I guess.

[Solid Snake]

THREE

HORRIBLE

YEARS

So basically, we've spent more time in crappy Act 6 than in great Acts 1 through 5 combined, and now Act 6 is basically going to be retconned anyway, or at least everything that happened to the Kids-who-aren't-John and Trolls we care about (screw those Alpha dorks) is almost certainly going to be retconned.

Christ on a stick. I've now spent more time hating Homestuck than I spent loving it.

[Aldurin]

Just wait until the kickstarted video game turns out. Given Hussie's affinity for biting off more than he can chew and burning his fanbase for it, I really, really doubt it will pull through.

[synkr0nized]

So it sounds like my not keeping up with this hasn't been a bad decision.

[POS Industries]

So this will end 14/14/14?
http://i.imgur.com/6ckuVas.gif

[Solid Snake]

Three years in a doomed timeline that only John will remember elements of confirmed everybody!!!!!!!

...Thanks, Andrew.

[Loyal]

Oh hey, that weird wailey noise from Secret of Mana.

[Arcanum]

Just want to point out that we don't know when John's timeline became doomed. It could've been when they were travelling to the Noble kids universe, or it could be some event much more recent. There's also no evidence that Jade's timeline is the alpha timeline.

I know a lot of people here like to get worked up over speculation, but I personally prefer the "wait and see" approach before shouting that three years of story telling are now moot.

[Loyal]

==> ?

[Aldurin]

Yes, Hussie, we see you can retcon stuff. Jerking off your ability to do so doesn't make us more impressed by it.

[Ryong]

You'd think the instrument would require active use of windy powers, but nope.

[Locke cole]

John is going to appear in Caliborn's room and blow on the cartridge.

Heir of Breath.

Well, it didn't turn out exactly like that, but still.

[Arcanum]

You'd think the instrument would require active use of windy powers, but nope.

The use of windy powers like the ones he just used?

[Flarecobra]

The Super Windy Thing.

[Arhra]

Well, it didn't turn out exactly like that, but still.

I am disappointed it didn't turn out exactly like that.

[Ryong]

The use of windy powers like the ones he just used?

No I mean playing an actual wind instrument, like a gigantic pan flute.

Or that wind mechanism from Avatar's very first season.

[Premmy]

A pipe organ is a wind instrument of sorts.

[Ryong]

Well, yes, but he's pressing keys, not sending gusts of wind into pipes.

...Well the keys are making gusts of wind go into pipes, but that's not the point.

[Locke cole]

Well, yes, but he's pressing keys, not sending gusts of wind into pipes.

...Well the keys are making gusts of wind go into pipes, but that's not the point.

I thought it was a combination of things. He's pressing keys and using his powers on the pipes the keys open. The blue wind is sort of the signature of his power.

[Arcanum]

It's not just the blue wind. It's that we're shown his hands glowing right before he slams them down and the storm really picks up. The glow which has always been a sign of John using his windy powers.

http://i.imgur.com/FajmKqt.png

[Arcanum]

Welp, looks like Snake is going to be right. Goddammit Hussie.

[Solid Snake]

Welp, looks like Snake is going to be right.

Someone needs to take this quote and put it on t-shirts.

[POS Industries]

I typed "HOM3" as Terezi's password and it didn't work. This comic sucks. Hussie's a hack.

[Flarecobra]

Try just regular "home" there POS.

And it appears we actually got story progression!

[POS Industries]

Try just regular "home" there POS.
THAT'S WHY HUSSIE'S A HACK.

[Solid Snake]

What sucks is that we only got a presumably small number of updates until Homestuck ends (if, indeed, Homestuck is ever even capable of ending, given Andrew's temptation to stretch it into oblivion) and we're wasting these updates watching John derp along like a clueless dumbass when we could, instead, be watching actual plot development or learning more about any number of mysteries or even just seeing other characters in the only iteration of thei universe that will ultimately matter.

You know what this feels like? The last season of LOST.

[POS Industries]

Back in the day, I used to describe Homestuck to people as "LOST, but good."

Now I just say it's LOST.

[Solid Snake]

Hahahaha I'm so glad Vriska's intimately involved in this bullshit update that proves my previous point about Hussie meandering around instead of actually doing shit that matters

[Flarecobra]

And John just summed up the trolls in a simple statement.

[Loyal]

Even in the story, nobody gives a shit about death anymore.[/cynic]

[Ryong]

Homestuck is going to end not on a loud honk like Hussie seemingly wanted at some point, but on a tired, unintelligible whisper.

[Solid Snake]

Homestuck is going to end not on a loud honk like Hussie seemingly wanted at some point, but on a tired, unintelligible whisper.

Hey, now! How couldn't you be thoroughly invested in a story where all the character development and plot twists we've seen over the course of however many years simply will never have happened?

What's hysterical about recent events is that Terezi is actually confirming something worse than Solid Snake's worst fears: The Jade we saw was also in a doomed timeline, but John's actually going to be making even more changes further back into the narrative! It isn't just most of Act Six that'll be irrelevant. My guess is Terezi has John going back into Hivebent. Fucking Hivebent!

'Subtle' changes my ass. This is going to suck, particularly when one of the changes inevitably results in Vriska being alive.

[Ryong]

First, he's not "writing himself into needing Retcons". This is what he allegedly planned to do, he's using retcons as part of storytelling. It's a fucking horrible idea, though.

Second, hey, comic book fans deal with retcons all the time, maybe they're used to it by now and wouldn't think much about this. Remember when Peter Parker made a deal with the devil literally trading away his love life and unborn child to revive his extremely old aunt?

And third, listen, I know you hate Vriska, but if anything, for a long time now, Meenah has been leading Vriska around to do stuff. I'm also not entirely sure why would you - or anyone, for the matter - care about someone being alive or dead at this point. Convoluted plot bullshit has made the concept of dying pretty much meaningless - imagine if on Problem Sleuth every time a character died Death would show up and start trying to get them to enter the door to afterlife, without being forceful. Homestuck has hit this point years ago.

[Bard The 5th LW]

Like, it was interesting when we had short term retcons that played with our expectations, like the glimpse into Davesprite's timeline or the fakeout where Jack annihilated the meteor in Terezi's vision, but its just pretty cheapening to see large sections of the plot and conflict nullified by literal retcons? The more and more it happens, the harder it is to convince me it was actually planned in any way, especially since the thing that gave John the retcon power came essentially out of nowhere. Like, there wasn't any real build-up or foreshadowing to it, it just happened.

[Ryong]

I'm more willing to call Hussie a hack with a terrible sense of "is this a good idea?" instead of a hack that can't plan ahead.

[Flarecobra]

Hellooooo Filler!

[Arhra]

Like, it was interesting when we had short term retcons that played with our expectations, like the glimpse into Davesprite's timeline or the fakeout where Jack annihilated the meteor in Terezi's vision, but its just pretty cheapening to see large sections of the plot and conflict nullified by literal retcons? The more and more it happens, the harder it is to convince me it was actually planned in any way, especially since the thing that gave John the retcon power came essentially out of nowhere. Like, there wasn't any real build-up or foreshadowing to it, it just happened.

Well, that's the problem really. All the good foreshadowing and time loops petered out long ago with the sequence that would normally complete the session/did lead to the arrival of Lord English.

Instead we've got all this faffing about with retcons which cannot be foreshadowed in any way and no-one's actually got a clearly articulated plan or role to play any more except for they somehow pull an alternative Calliope in to beat the snot out of Lord English.

Does John even know who Lord English is?

[mauve]

I honestly didn't remember that Jane knew Calliope.

[POS Industries]

I honestly didn't remember that Jane knew Calliope.
I barely even remember who Jade is at this point.

She's the blonde dude with the time powers, right?

[Karrrrrrrrrrrresche]

You're thinking of Arada Horatio.

[Flarecobra]

Homestuck: Where the filler has filler.

[Solid Snake]

So the entire purpose of this dumbass retconning is just so Vriska of all the fucking atrocious and unworthy characters can live.

Fuck my life.

[Loyal]

Hello, long-dead John/Nepeta ship, let me just dust you off real quick.

So the entire purpose of this dumbass retconning is just so Vriska of all the fucking atrocious and unworthy characters can live.Bear in mind that if Terezi hadn't killed Vriska where she stood, Vriska would have certainly died fighting Jack anyway. This was explicitly shown, in fact. (http://www.mspaintadventures.com/scratch.php?s=6&p=005719)

I'm not saying she won't still find a way to not-die, but that's not what's happening here. It's also perhaps one of the least-subtle changes one could make to the timeline short of stopping SBURB itself from ever coming into John's hands. If Vriska is alive and meddling for three years on the battleship along with all the others, that's going to result in quite a lot of additional changes, and would fly far, far beyond Terezi's ability to predict.

[POS Industries]

Vriska still killed Tavros and Terezi would conceivably still make sure that she faces justice for that, but now Gamzee should be facing justice as well rather than having his crimes pinned on Vriska.

Also these past couple updates are the first time I've had a positive, entertained reaction to this comic in god only knows how long.

[Bard The 5th LW]

Im pretty sure Vriska still has to die because if she doesnt, then Jack will find the meteor and destroy it unless there's a retcon to fix that too.

[Arcanum]

Vriska only has to die if she can't be convinced to not fight Jack. If the changes somehow allow Terezi to convince Vriska to stay, then she doesn't need to die.

And if Vriska somehow lives it will still end up being a sort of meta "fuck you" to her, since it will mean she won't meet Meenah, and we've seen that Vriska ended up pretty happy in the afterlife with Meenah.

And who knows how these shenanigans will affect the afterlife. Will it really be that the two never meet, or simply an alternate couple that never meet up? Or will afterlife Vriska simply disappear as a result of the change, leaving Meenah alone and confused and motivated to do something?

That's all if Vriska actually somehow doesn't die, and while I'm not sure if she will or not, I'm pretty sure that's not the point to these shenanigans.

The main point is for Terezi to stay blind. She's sowing distrust with Gamzee so she won't fall into a downward spiral on the meteor while pursuing a relationship with him, which is a big part of why she let Aranea fix her eyes. There's a chance the "you don't need him" could even be referring to Gamzee, but I'm not so sure about that.

[Bard The 5th LW]

It probably refers to Gamzee.

[Flarecobra]

I think this was the first time in a very long time that this comic actually made me laugh.

Poor John.

[Solid Snake]

Update was decent but I'm still paralyzed in fear over the obvious impending resurrection of Vriska as Homestuck's Most Important Character.

Like, I'm going to be pissed off if the moral of the story is that all Vriska's sins can be forgiven by sheer virtue of her plot armor whereas other characters' sins merit death.

Then again, this is actually kind of a pleasant return to the old status quo, wherein the majority perspective is "Homestuck's cool!" and Snake's in the background gripin' about Vriska. Is it 2011 all over again or something?

[Arcanum]

Homestuck's Most Important Character.

But Snake we already know that's Gamzee. ::V:

[Bard The 5th LW]

I think being dead for like 4 years real-time is enough to give credit to the idea that Vriska doesnt have all important plot armor.

[Solid Snake]

I think being dead for like 4 years real-time is enough to give credit to the idea that Vriska doesnt have all important plot armor.

Sssshhhh don't get in the way of my Vriska-hate

[Loyal]

I think being dead for like 4 years real-time is enough to give credit to the idea that Vriska doesnt have all important plot armor.

Nepeta and Equius are dead. Vriska's just ... kinda out of the way. :smug:

[Flarecobra]

Oh look, Vriska update.

[Solid Snake]

Oh look, Vriska update.

Further proof that Vriska is coming back to haunt me
Andrew's just setting this all up to yank her away from Meenah
Well, you can KEEP HER, Meenah! Please do! You two are actually kind of adorable together!!! You actually make Vriska almost tolerable!!

So don't let her come back to life please please please Meenah, I'll do aaaannnyyytttthhhhiiiiiiinnnnggggg

[Premmy]

Yaaaay Vriska

[Bard The 5th LW]

Some updates on the game, apparently. (http://mspaintadventures.com/KSupdate.html)

[Flarecobra]

Vriska doing what she does best: Getting punched in the face.

[Solid Snake]

...
......
.........
............
...............

...God hates me
God hates me
God hates me
God hates me
God hates *me*
God hates me
God hates me
I knew it
I knew Andrew would
I knew this entire pathetic story
Was his excuse to
Fuck with me
Destroy my hopes and dreams
Build up a universe of possibilities
In which the evil are killed
And the characters I like are alive
But no
NO
No
She is the important one
She's the most important
Literally have to fuck up the entire timestream
Just to save her
Not Tavros
Not Equius
Not Nepeta
Not any of the characters I liked
No
Vriska
Vriska the malignant abusive meanie
Vriska the nightmare
She is the one who must live
She has always been the piece
She is the one who Andrew created just to haunt me
To destroy my hopes and dreams of justice
To destroy every vision I have of a decent world that is worth living in
No
No No No
NO NO NO NO
No No No
Snake never gets what he wants
The universe operates on the sole assumption that Snake must suffer
That is why Ohio State will lose tomorrow
That is why the Patriots will lose next week
That is why my career will continually implode and collapse on itself
That is why Mitt Romney will win the 2016 elections
And that is why Republicans will fuck over the economy
That's why every woman I attempt to date ends up shattering me and treating me like shit
Treating me like Vriska treats people
This is the inevitable byproduct of a world that continually seeks to hurt Snake
This was inevitable
I should have seen it coming
I did see it coming
But I kept reading, like an eager dog, desperate to be proven wrong
Desperate to find something, anything I could label 'hope'
Hope for change, hope for progression
Hope for a future, free of pain
Hope for tomorrow, hope for goodness
Hope for prosperity, hope of triumph against evil
Terezi one of my favorite characters
One of my favorite decent trolls
Likable
I thought she was likable
Her only plan to save everyone
Was simply to revive her with the mere hope she would resolve everything through sheer existence
That was her plan!!!
That was her role!!!!!!
That was everyone's role!!!!!!!!!!
The entire thing was a charade
Meant to prove simply that Vriska was the essential missing ingredient
Preventing the humans and trolls from achieving a modicum of success
Now Vriska is alive
Now my least favorite is alive
But that is the way it always goes
That is the outcome that is always preordained
This outcome was merely to be expected
This outcome was written before I was even born
God hates me
God hates me
God hates me
God hates me
God hates me
God hates me
God hates me
God hates me
God. Hates. Me.
God
Hates
Me
God
Hates
ME
UUUUGGGGGHHHHH
God hates me
Andrew Hussie hates me
Andrew must be bros with God
The two are conspiring
They hate me
They must be stopped
I have to stop them
It's not right
It's not right
It's not right
It's NOT RIGHT
Homestuck is a piece of shit webcomic
I hate it and everyone who got me into it
I hate I hate I hate I hate I hate I hate
I hate I hate I hate
Homesuck it sucks it sucks IT SUCKS
Hate hate hate hate hate
Hate hate hate hate hate hate hate
Broken broken broken broken broken
Broken broken broken broken
Broken
Broken
Brok
en

[/all systems offline: profound mental error occurred in Snake.exe]
*system reboot required*
~*processing*~

...
......
.........
............
................

...So hey guys wasssssup?

Hahaha not much here I am quite well. The weather today was quite pleasant and tomorrow is looking peachy too. Those were dashing football games on earlier today, keen displays of skill by all players!!!

Oh by golly, it looks like Homestuck the best webcomic ever has updated again, right on schedule! Oh look at this, quite clever writing! Oh and I see, the goal all along was to revive Vriska! Oh Vriska, you kooky pirate you, you've been missed. Now that Vriska is back I'm sure she will save the day and bring this webcomic to quite the satisfactory conclusion!!! I am very much looking forward to reading it!!!!! I also quite hope there are several scenes in which John and Terezi and even Tavros' dead spirit collectively forgive her. Of course, forgiving her would imply that Vriska had done anything wrong in the first place, silly me, of course that isn't true!!! It will be very touching and an altogether delightful experience to read. Oh, and delightful for all my friends who love Vriska too!!!! POS must be so very thrilled, and now I am thrilled for him!!!!! Do you know what else will be delightful? When Roxy and John lose all their memories of their times together and their efforts to bring about this desired outcome, enabling John and Vriska to become the couple Homestuck always deserved!! You know what's silly? There was a time long before Vriska was introduced where I genuinely believed characters like Dave and Rose and Karkat and Jade were more important than her. Boy, Andrew sure did prove that suspicion wrong!!! And Vriska's completely unearned luck-stealing powers aren't Mary Sue at all, but instead well-deserved character development!!!! Why I really do feel she's earned her role as the main character of this story and the one character who nothing could happen without through her impeccable leadership skills and her remarkable values.

Vriska Vriska Vriska Vriska...why, even the name truly sounds like the very best name ever concocted by an author with esteemed literary skills! It flows so effortlessly off the tongue!!!! I am just so very grateful to be here in the year 2015, reading this webcomic I've invested so much time into with all of you, enjoying year after year of twist and turn that leads to the great Vriska's return into the spotlight!!!!! I look forward to reading the well-reasoned and appropriate justification as to why Vriska deserved this honor through sheer virtue of Andrew Hussie liking her more than anyone else and writing the story to satisfy his whims. His whims are just so perfectly realized though, no one could ever doubt his mad skills as an author and an artist, I am so very happy everyone!!!!!! Happy as could be!!!!!!!!!!!! To live in such a perfect world where such wonderful things could happen!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Premmy]

I swear, I enjoy Vriska being terrible only half as much as I enjoy your hatred of her, Snake

[Loyal]

I would like to formally retract and apologize for my statement, Snake. My blind optimism has gotten the better of me once again.

[Amake]

I feel like my blind optimism has allowed me to enjoy every moment of this comic, and lately even more so. The romance, the sad stuff, Terezi's mysterious plan, and even these storytellers who I can't really remember who, when and where they are, if you want my opinion, it's really neat. Like I'll allow that this
http://i696.photobucket.com/albums/vv324/immortalpictures/cheesevriska.gif
is a massively cheesy and shamelessly self-indulgent image, framing Vriska as both the spider at the center of the web and the focal point of the superdestruction of superspace, I mean, at this point I'm assuming Hussie is making fun of himself for getting so carried away with his character. But I'm unironically loving it as much as I love Con Air. And also, below these metatextual shenanigans, there's a really simple and sweet love story being told between two characters who, let's face it, have aged enough and been dead long enough since we used to read about them that we can't make any assumptions about who they are based on their past actions.

Feels like a fresh start for them, alone in this beautiful world that's about to be murdered. And the rest of the comic is sort of like that. I think Hussie is writing poetry in a visual, narrative language all of his own. I'm not saying it's flawless, but it's fascinating, as it was from the beginning, to see something so unlike everything else.

Maybe I'm just looking at it like the delay in updates doesn't matter.

[Bard The 5th LW]

With the whole spiel about the mystery person being SUPER LUCKY GUYS I feel like there's still going to have to be some twist we don't see coming because the description makes it sound so obviously like Vriska that there's no way it is her.

[mauve]

With the whole spiel about the mystery person being SUPER LUCKY GUYS I feel like there's still going to have to be some twist we don't see coming because the description makes it sound so obviously like Vriska that there's no way it is her.

Mindfang.

[Bard The 5th LW]

Or Charles Barkley.

[rpgdemon]

With the whole spiel about the mystery person being SUPER LUCKY GUYS I feel like there's still going to have to be some twist we don't see coming because the description makes it sound so obviously like Vriska that there's no way it is her.

Yeah, I figure there's absolutely no way that it's going to be Vriska.

Remember, John also was supposed to be dead when the story started.

[mauve]

Maybe it's Tavros' imaginary friend, Rufioh, who will arrive in the nick of time to save the world.

[Premmy]

If he promised Dante Basco a voice role it most definitely could happen.

[Flarecobra]

I Suddenly Don't Understand Anything And Am Currently Casting Sincere Doubt On The Laughable Insinuation That I Or Anyone Else Ever Actually Did For Even A Single Moment.

I think she just summed up Homestuck.

[Bard The 5th LW]

I think thatd be a good contender for Thread Title if it was a bit shorter.

[Amake]

"Casting Sincere Doubt On The Laughable Insinuation Anyone Ever Understood Homestuck" fits, barely.

[Solid Snake]

Ohhhhhhhh...

I HATE ANDREW HUSSIE

I HATE, I HATE, I HATE,

I HATE ANDREW HUSSIE

I HATE, I HATE, I HATE!

I HATE ANDREW HUSSIE,

I HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE...

I HATE ANDREW HUSSIE,

I HATE HIM VERY MUCH!!!


Oh once upon a time, in America, the year 2015

A man named Snake saw through the disguise of a demon quite obscene,

He was Andrew Hussie and of all webcomic authors he was the worst,

For he resurrected the most awful character ever in the history of the multiverse!

Ohhhhhhhh...

I HATE ANDREW HUSSIE

I HATE, I HATE, I HATE,

I HATE ANDREW HUSSIE

I HATE, I HATE, I HATE!

I HATE ANDREW HUSSIE,

I HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE...

I HATE ANDREW HUSSIE,

I HATE HIM VERY MUCH!!!

[Karrrrrrrrrrrresche]

It's snowing on Mt. Fuji.

[Bard The 5th LW]

That was a bit of a letdown.

[Arhra]

Ohhhhhhhh...

I HATE ANDREW HUSSIE

...

I HATE HIM VERY MUCH!!!

Woah there Snake, enough with the shouty writing. This isn't about you.

It's about Vriska.

[Malek]

Ohhhhhhhh...

I H8 ANDREW HUSSIE

I H8, I H8, I H8, etc...



Fixed that for you Snake. ;:::)

[Menarker]

Welp, Homestuck updated again. Good to see Caliborn attempting new artistic methods. =3

EDIT: Also big sales in the Homestuck shop for the next few days if that is anyone's thing. 41.3% off to be exact.

[Arhra]

Is it just me or has he also become marginally more literate?

[Loyal]

No lie, I would totally love to see an actual full comic with panels expressed in shitty clay dolls animated by stop motion.

[Flarecobra]

Those were actually rather adorable looking. :)

[Arcanum]

So Lord English is actually a weird hybrid of Caliborn, Equius, and Dave's Auto Responder. I did not see that coming.

[Solid Snake]

So Lord English is actually a weird hybrid of Caliborn, Equius, and Dave's Auto Responder. I did not see that coming.

So is Lord English created by the kids in the new-and-NOT AT FUCKING ALL-improved John-Saves-Vriska session or some kind of alpha version of the game where the Kids never met the Trolls?

[Arcanum]

I would assume whichever session John and Roxy are headed to, since they use John's McGuffin teleport power to get to Caliborn in the first place, which is most likely the "Vriska is the best" timeline.

[Loyal]

I've been thinking on it, on and off, for the last day or so. I think I've officially reached the point where I no longer have any idea what's going on.

[Menarker]

So Lord English is actually a weird hybrid of Caliborn, Equius, and Dave's Auto Responder. I did not see that coming.

It also has the soul of Gamzee, if we take the purple portion of clay going into the Cal-figure to be him. Or at least half of Gamzee's soul, given that the other half of his clay body is still beneath stage on the next page.

[Solid Snake]

I would assume whichever session John and Roxy are headed to, since they use John's McGuffin teleport power to get to Caliborn in the first place, which is most likely the "Vriska is the best" timeline.

Hahaha so in an effort to save the multiverse from Lord English John creates the exact circumstances in a new timeline that create Lord English? Hahahaha we're near the end of the fuckin' story and it's still such a depressing slog through complete lack of character agency.

But like, more importantly: Why weren't any of the trolls involved in the fight? So the eight kids say "We're gonna take on Caliborn" and Terezi and Karkat and Kanaya and (eww) Vriska are just like "K y'alls have fun!"