So, I'm going to Germany on Tuesday.

[Solid Snake]

This will be my first time in Europe. I'm traveling to Switzerland, staying in Zurich for a day, then spending some time in the Alps. Will spend a day in Salzburg, Austria, but the majority of the trip will be spent in Munich and in surrounding Bavaria.

...Has anyone been to Germany before in winter? Does anyone here live in Germany? Anyone got any tips for anything to do while I'm there? Is there are a remotely decent nightlife? How many people there actually speak English? As I know virtually no German, will I have difficulty making my way around town? Are American tourists at an advantage or a disadvantage when it comes to picking up German women? Are there hotspots I should research or is it more a matter of blind luck? Will everything really shut down on me during the Christmas festivities? Are there any sights in Zurich, Munich or Salzburg that I absolutely must see? Can I actually plug in my electrical equipment out there? (I read there was some issue with European and American electronics not quite matching up? I presume that means I couldn't purchase a videogame in Europe and expect it to work on an American DS?)

...Oh, man. So many questions. So many questions. I've been living in the land of Law over the past few weeks and I've only just now come to the realization that Germany is so close at hand. I'm excited, but really rather nervous...I don't travel outside the country much. I'm pretty sure all the research and all the advice I could possibly garner won't fully prepare me for this, but it's worth trying.

[Nikose Tyris]

Meister and Melfice both live in Germany.

Well, Meister does. Melfice is a filthy Dutchman. But both will probably have words for you.

[Raiden]

I went there once.

All I can tell you is to bring change in case you need to use a public restroom. They have a tendency to make you pay for public toilets.

Also, visit the castles. They've got some really beautiful castles which normally have a ton of great shops to get souvenirs and such in.

[Wigmund]

How many people there actually speak English? As I know virtually no German, will I have difficulty making my way around town?

Everyone speaks English - no matter where you are. You just have to speak it loud and slow so they can understand you because they're filthy foreigners. If they still don't understand you, then they are brain-damaged and should be brought to the attention of the local authorities so they can be culled because that's what foreign countries do.

Are American tourists at an advantage or a disadvantage when it comes to picking up German women?

All foreign women love American men. that's just a law of nature. Look at Benjamin Franklin, ugly cuss but he got all those French women and would have collected one from every other country but Washington and Jefferson were jealous of Franklin's bitches so they had him return home.

[Corel]

This will be my first time in Europe. I'm traveling to Switzerland, staying in Zurich for a day, then spending some time in the Alps. Will spend a day in Salzburg, Austria, but the majority of the trip will be spent in Munich and in surrounding Bavaria.

Congratulaions! You have picked my favourite area of Europe and one of my favourite cities in Germany.

...Has anyone been to Germany before in winter? Does anyone here live in Germany? Anyone got any tips for anything to do while I'm there? Is there are a remotely decent nightlife? How many people there actually speak English? As I know virtually no German, will I have difficulty making my way around town?

There will probably be quite a bit of snow (so expect the cold), but as they're used to that there shouldn't be too many problems transport wise. You're in Munich which is like the party capital of Southern Germany. Nightlife there is huge so you don't have to worry about that. I would say the entire population have at least basic English, with most having decent English skills so you don't have to worry about that too. If you're really worried about it take a translation book just in case, but I'm confident you don't really need one. The only people who you might struggle with are some people who are 50+ or are from smaller settlements.

Are American tourists at an advantage or a disadvantage when it comes to picking up German women? Are there hotspots I should research or is it more a matter of blind luck? Will everything really shut down on me during the Christmas festivities?

Germans seem pretty neutral towards Americans, could vary from place to place though. Also enjoy the festivities. Be sure to check out those Christmas markets, it's all very magical. Also, I'm pretty sure everything closes on Sunday and I mean EVERYTHING. My memory could be a bit hazy on if everything shuts down over Christmas. I'm pretty sure the Eve and Xmas day yes because Eve is when families open presents I recall.

Are there any sights in Zurich, Munich or Salzburg that I absolutely must see?

I could give you a few but I will leave that up to the natives, as they probably know and have seen much more than I have. Do you have a car? That entire area is gorgeous to drive through or make a day trip to see.

Can I actually plug in my electrical equipment out there? (I read there was some issue with European and American electronics not quite matching up? I presume that means I couldn't purchase a videogame in Europe and expect it to work on an American DS?)

Germany use Type C plugs, so I am guessing no. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/AC_power_plugs_and_sockets#Type_C)

...Oh, man. So many questions. So many questions. I've been living in the land of Law over the past few weeks and I've only just now come to the realization that Germany is so close at hand. I'm excited, but really rather nervous...I don't travel outside the country much. I'm pretty sure all the research and all the advice I could possibly garner won't fully prepare me for this, but it's worth trying.

Ah, throw caution and stress to the wind and enjoy yourself. Drink good beer, eat Doener Kebabs and dance like a loon on tables, it's the German way. Are you travelling with anyone out of interest? You will find most people quite friendly and especially in those cities getting into the Christmas spirit.

(For the record the above is advice from someone who has lived in Germany before.)

[Geminex]

I agree with all above points. You should get along without any german, as english is mandatory in schools, but still, carry a dictionary. And make sure to adress any person with "Fick dich und deine Mutter" to endear yourself to them.

As for electronics, adapters are quite cheap so you can plug whatever electronics you want it... I'm not sure about the games, but German DS games work in Australian Gameboys and vice versa, so I think you should be safe.

Also German, so I know what I'm talking about. Trust me. Especially on how to adress peopel.

[Eltargrim]

a) You'll need some sort of voltage converter so your shit doesn't blow up.
b) The DS (specficially) is region free, so you'd be good for that one. The rest, who knows?

[Meister]

Can I actually plug in my electrical equipment out there? (I read there was some issue with European and American electronics not quite matching up? I presume that means I couldn't purchase a videogame in Europe and expect it to work on an American DS?)
Like has been said, get a voltage converter/plug adapter and you'll be good to go. DS is fine but other console games (for non-portables) could cause problems because the US and Europe use different TV standards. There's also a chance these games are region-locked, similar to DVDs.[/QUOTE]

... I guess Corel covered this one otherwise. One thing:

eat Doener Kebabs
absolutely do this. Preferrably have a good one for lunch so your first impression isn't the one you pick up when you're smashed at 2 a.m.

[Mirai Gen]

I saw this from the main forum page with "So I'm going to Germany on Tuesday" and I saw Meister had posted last.

For a second I was very very confused as I thought he opened the thread.

[Corel]

I agree with all above points. You should get along without any german, as english is mandatory in schools, but still, carry a dictionary. And make sure to adress any person with "Fick dich und deine Mutter" to endear yourself to them.

Also German, so I know what I'm talking about. Trust me. Especially on how to adress peopel.

Story: First couple of weeks working in Germany (And knowing jack shit about the language) if I recognised a caller ID of one of my colleagues I would answer the phone with "Moshi Moshi!".

It wasn't until later on until someone informed me what it meant (Or sounded like) in German. Decided that maybe it wasn't the best idea in the world to answer the phone like that.

[Geminex]

Nice. Though not as bad as it seems. It's like someone answering the phone with "Vay-jay-jay!" Plenty weird (Is there a story behind why you chose "moshi moshi", or was it just random?), but not blatant enough for your colleagues to think you knew what you were saying.

[Archbio]

I read there was some issue with European and American electronics not quite matching up?

It's also an even worse idea to try and adjust a lightbulb while standing in a bathtub in Europe than it is in North America.

[Professor Smarmiarty]

Re English: I lived in Berlin for 6 months and don't speak a word of German. I got around ok- though you might piss some people off. I can't speak much for Munich though.

For electronics you need an adaptor plug, mostly because the US use wussy low voltages in their plugs. If you are in within 10V of the new coutry (as in lots of places use 230V or 240V) you can just take off the plug head and rearrange the wires in the walls but US uses 110V and Europe is around 230-240V so you will need an adaptor.

If you want to pick up German chicks without speaking German- find student bars. Problem solved.

Videogames- depends on your system as others have said. DS is ok.

And just reaffirming what Corel said because he wasn't sure- absolutely everything shuts down on Sunday- only places that I remember being open where museums ad a few of the most touristy restraurants. You need to be prepared for it- my friend who lives in Germany always forgets to go to the shops on Sat and has no food Sunday.
If Munich is anything like Berlin go to crazy Christmas markets that occupy the streets after shop closes. You can find all kinds of crazy shits and crazy foods.

Don't know much about Munich, sorry, and I have a friend who lives there but I'm far from home so can't talk to him easily.

Alongside kebabs go to German chocolate shops- those places are amazing. But holy fuck GERMAN BREAD> Get yourself a loaf of that and tuck in. It is nothing like bread you get back home. I still crave it when I'm far away.

[Melfice]

German bread is way too tough and stiff and dry for my tastes, but eh. Tastes differ.

There is really not much I can add to this, aside from mentioning to avoid any kind of advice from Nikose in the future. I spoke to some of his doctors recently, and they say he's completely insane. It's only by virtue of being relatively harmless that he's still allowed to walk free.

Regarding videogames: Anything for DS and PS3 should be a-okay. Anything else is purely by discretion of the developer, but you should assume it's region-locked.

[Professor Smarmiarty]

German bread is way too tough and stiff and dry for my tastes, but eh. Tastes differ.
And some people are insane and others of us are function members of society.
You may be crazy like Melfice but at least try it.



Regarding videogames: Anything for DS and PS3 should be a-okay. Anything else is purely by discretion of the developer, but you should assume it's region-locked.

Depends a bit on your country too as some places you can't sell region-locked devices of certain kinds. Though as far as I know US is not one of those.

[Meister]

Well you probably won't want to pick up games here anyway once you see how retardedly expensive they are in direct comparison.

[Corel]

Nice. Though not as bad as it seems. It's like someone answering the phone with "Vay-jay-jay!" Plenty weird (Is there a story behind why you chose "moshi moshi", or was it just random?), but not blatant enough for your colleagues to think you knew what you were saying.

Moshi Moshi is how you greet over the Telephone in Japan (Or what we have been led to believe, anyway).

Re English: I lived in Berlin for 6 months and don't speak a word of German. I got around ok- though you might piss some people off. I can't speak much for Munich though.

It's pretty much the same, International cities kind of expect this. Know people who have lived there now for over 5 years and still can't speak a word of German.


If you want to pick up German chicks without speaking German- find student bars. Problem solved.


You might also find German nightlife incredibly laid back compared to where you are from Solid Snake. If you want to meet other foreigners there are quite a few expat bars in Munich. Travellers tend to hook up quite a bit, if you're looking for that sort of thing.

And just reaffirming what Corel said because he wasn't sure- absolutely everything shuts down on Sunday- only places that I remember being open where museums ad a few of the most touristy restraurants. You need to be prepared for it- my friend who lives in Germany always forgets to go to the shops on Sat and has no food Sunday.

I'm pretty sure 32 foreigners die every Sunday because of this.

Off topic somewhat, but I am a firm believer that I can speak Dutch to some sort of okay level. Everytime I hear it I think "This is just German and English slapped together!"

...Man I really could go for a Doener and other German food right about now. Germany makes awesome Winter food.

[Professor Smarmiarty]

Well you probably won't want to pick up games here anyway once you see how retardedly expensive they are in direct comparison.

Try coming from where I come for. It makes German games seem ridiculously cheap.

[Geminex]

It does. "New game, lotta hype, that'll be $100, thanks. Oh, wait, if you give us half a dozen of your other games, we'll cut it down to $60!"

I mean, ok, it's Aussie or New Zealand dollars respectively, so it doesn't count as real money, but still.

And yes, german bread rocks. We started making our own when we moved away.

I was never much of a Doener Kebab fan, but I see the appeal. And while you're there, try the cheeses. Way better than the monotonous cheddar America seems to thrive on.

[Osterbaum]

Germany is for pussies. This time of year, real men come to Finland.

[Meister]

You should probably also read Ich werde ein Berliner (http://www.ichwerdeeinberliner.com/).

As it was established before, German people quickly feel uncomfortable when there is nothing to be offended or worried about. If they currently have no personal reason to be offended or worried about anything, they will go to a bookstore to buy a book written by what they consider to be a much more intelligent person, who happens to be altruistic and kind enough to lecture them about recent developments that they should better be offended or worried about, and that person, more often than not, is Frank Schirrmacher.
[...]
His latest book, which is likely to become another bestseller, deals with the “dangers of the internet.” To Frank, the internet is at least 99% bad and a health risk for those little neurons who live inside that spongey stuff inside your skull called “brain,” so he highly recommends to go buy his book and read that until your brain turns numb from all the dull statistics and references to obscure studies. Admittedly, that will save you from having your brain turned into elephant poo by the internet because you can have a really, really intellectual German person do it for you instead. It’s the same tactical approach to health as cutting off your hand to keep your fingernails from growing.

[Professor Smarmiarty]

Another thing, pack warm. I don't know how cold it is where you are from but Germany freezes like a mofo.

Also German people are crazy ordered. Like you'll be at a traffic crossing, not a car in site. Every other country people would cross the road but lots of them just stand there waiting for the little man.Apparentely there is like a 40 euro fine for jaywalking and they will give it to you. This is what I was told, don't know if it is true but would explain why no one cross.

You can ride the underground without a ticket, in Berlin at least, but if the inspector catches you you have to pay something like 50 euros. A newspaper worked out it is cheaper just to pay fines when they come rather than buying tickets but tickets are quite cheap normally so really its up to you whether you risk it. I just bought tickets.

[A Zarkin' Frood]

I'm from what I like to call the best part of the worst part of Germany. We have religious nutjobs, bad food, drunkards, right-wing politicians but...

try the cheeses. Way better than the monotonous cheddar America seems to thrive on.
Exactly that. American cheese is freakin' orange. ORANGE?! How the fuck do you make orange cheese AND survive eating it? Over here cheese will come in many other colors like white, slightly yellow-ish, another shade of white with some green, bright yellow and many more.
Try European cheese. Now!

Also, please reaffirm something for me.
Buy a German product that says "American" on the label and please give your impression. A certain American person I know says "That's not American, it's German American it's not the same. (commence rambling)"

[Professor Smarmiarty]

Wait wait wait. Orange cheese?

[A Zarkin' Frood]

It's just what I once saw, it was horrible, okay. Maybe the rest of american cheese is reasonably colored and even tastes okay, but I can't check right now.

[Sky Warrior Bob]

I think he's talking about yellow cheddar. I prefer the white stuff myself, preference on Cabot of Vermont (http://www.shopcabot.com/products.php?catID=1). They make some mean sharp cheddar.

Yellow cheddar over here seems to be the preference of restaurants, but whenever I go to the supermarket, the varieties of white sharp cheddar are at least 5:1. I think yellow has a lower melting point, so its good for cooking.

I personally don't care a wit for it, but its basically a really mild & soft cheddar. Too soft & too mild, if you ask me.

SWB

[Osterbaum]

But cheddar tastes awesome.

[Krylo]

It's called cheddar (http://images.google.com/images?q=cheddar&oe=utf-8&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a&um=1&ie=UTF-8&sa=N&hl=en&tab=wi). And, yes, it tastes awesome.

And you know, we actually have Monterey (I prefer pepper) Jack, Mozzarella, Provolone, Ricotta, Brie, Blue Cheese, Havarti Cheese, Gouda, Romano, Asiago, Formaginni, etc. etc.

We're a damn melting pot of all of your cultures, if you've got it we've got it. Maybe not in every supermarket, but most delis have a ridiculous selection of cheeses.

[Corel]

Another thing, pack warm. I don't know how cold it is where you are from but Germany freezes like a mofo.

Also German people are crazy ordered. Like you'll be at a traffic crossing, not a car in site. Every other country people would cross the road but lots of them just stand there waiting for the little man.Apparentely there is like a 40 euro fine for jaywalking and they will give it to you. This is what I was told, don't know if it is true but would explain why no one cross.

You can ride the underground without a ticket, in Berlin at least, but if the inspector catches you you have to pay something like 50 euros. A newspaper worked out it is cheaper just to pay fines when they come rather than buying tickets but tickets are quite cheap normally so really its up to you whether you risk it. I just bought tickets.

Bwhaha, oh I remember these three things VERY well.

I think the whole traffic light thing is quite good to set an example; even more so if there are children about. I found in some places people will say hello and goodbye to you when sitting down next to you or standing in an elevator, but I can imagine this might not be true everywhere.

Oh the trains. It is actually cheaper to get caught than pay a fine, it depends how lucky you are. In my stay the inspector would come around once every month or so (Taking the train twice everyday) and the fine would've been cheaper than buying the monthly ticket. If you get caught you might be lucky and play the foreigner card and you are only jumping out on the next stop and be let off, sometimes you're not. Also love the beast that is German public transporation.

Of course, I remember some friends of mine trying this, and got caught THREE times in a week without a pass. Talk about unlucky.

[Green Spanner]

But cheddar tastes awesome.

Cheddar should have protected designation of origin status, that way that tasteless orange crap you get in American supermarkets wouldn't be put in the same boat as a proper, beautiful bit of mature English cheddar.

They're pretty much two different cheeses, so why not?

[Krylo]

Oster's Finnish, Spanner.

[Professor Smarmiarty]

Cheddar is not really orange. Sort of off-white.
I was imagining something coloured like an orange.

[A Zarkin' Frood]

Yeah, he couldn't know that the orange stuff I talked about tastes like plastic.
I'm not going to declare the entirety of American cheese as shit, though. Just sayin'.

Another thing that was already mentioned comes to mind. Bread.
From what I know American bread is mostly for people without teeth. If you have teeth you'll love German bread. Or not, but you should give it a try.

[Sky Warrior Bob]

Cheddar is not really orange. Sort of off-white.
I was imagining something coloured like an orange.

No, there is a variety of cheddar here in America that is clearly orange (you can really tell when its sliced, which I personally don't care a wit for. I prefer aged sharp white cheddar myself (from Cabot (http://www.shopcabot.com/products.php?catID=1), as I've mentioned).

I don't know how its processed, but it does seem to have a lower melting point. Which is why I think restaurants prefer to use it.

Of course, you might be talking about Kraft Singles (http://www.sptimes.com/2007/05/04/images/Cheese_KraftSingles.jpg) too. Which are by far, the worst cheese in existance. They are yellow/orange too, and they indeed do taste like plastic.

SWB

[Professor Smarmiarty]

Another thing that was already mentioned comes to mind. Bread.
From what I know American bread is mostly for people without teeth. If you have teeth you'll love German bread. Or not, but you should give it a try.

Yeah German bread is good but it'll totally kill you if eat it every day. Or make you like a million kgs. It's so ridiculously heavy on the stomach.
And you can't really make much like a sandwich out of it.

[Green Spanner]

Oster's Finnish, Spanner.

I'm well aware of that. Where in my reply did I imply that he wasn't?

[Krylo]

When you replied to him with what 'you get in American supermarkets'?

Whatever.

I think you all may be talking about 'American Cheese' Velveeta, or Kraft Singles.

None of which are actually cheese at all, but some kind of synthetic cheese-esque monster that's not even made with milk, but rather oils. THOSE are pretty terrible.

Edit: Kinnnnda wish you guys would stop insulting American foods. We ALSO have access to heavy breads here. I tend to prefer the softer ones for sandwiches and what not, outside of subs/'rolls', however. But the thicker/heavier stuff is totally great when it comes to that type of sandwich, and is much better if you're just eating it with butter.

[Meister]

And you can't really make much like a sandwich out of it.
Hey now. Take a slice, spread some butter on it and add some cold cuts, maybe a few slices of pickle and some mustard, top it off with another slice and you're good to go.

This reminds me that I need to find a better bakery, the bread in the ones around my house is either ridiculously soft and spongy with a thin rubbery crust or will go dry within a matter of hours.

[greed]

Cheddar is not really orange. Sort of off-white.
I was imagining something coloured like an orange.

You ever see Red Leicester? That's about the colour of American orange cheeses.

[Krylo]

I think some brands actually add food coloring to their cheddars for some reason or another...

[Professor Smarmiarty]

Edit: Kinnnnda wish you guys would stop insulting American foods. We ALSO have access to heavy breads here. I tend to prefer the softer ones for sandwiches and what not, outside of subs/'rolls', however. But the thicker/heavier stuff is totally great when it comes to that type of sandwich, and is much better if you're just eating it with butter.

Hey, I was insulting non-German foods and cheese that was in imagination neon-orange. We can get Germany type bread here as well but it's totally nowhere near what I had in Germany.

Hey now. Take a slice, spread some butter on it and add some cold cuts, maybe a few slices of pickle and some mustard, top it off with another slice and you're good to go.
Straight to your grave maybe.
I think I just lack German super constitution.

You ever see Red Leicester? That's about the colour of American orange cheeses.

I know that and it's still not really that orange...

[Osterbaum]

I know little about different types of cheddar. All I know is, that I have not come across a type I didn't like.

Finnish food tends to not be so popular abroad. It's mostly peasants food for heavens sake!

Oster's Finnish, Spanner.
I'm well aware of that.
If someone on these forums didn't know where I was from, I would've been doing a bad job with trying to fit Finland in to every god damn conversation.

I am half spanish as well, btw.

[Professor Smarmiarty]

Cheddar is god awful no matter what type it is. Even the Cheddar from Cheddar is terrible.

[Osterbaum]

And I suppose next you're gonna say how much you enjoy Emmental.

[Green Spanner]

Cheddar is god awful no matter what type it is. Even the Cheddar from Cheddar is terrible.

:mad:

That is all.

[A Zarkin' Frood]

And I suppose next you're gonna say how much you enjoy Emmental.

Why? would it be weird if he did?

I can only speak for myself, but it's definitely my favorite cheese for sandwiches.

[Solid Snake]

...Well, this conversation has floated a bit off track.

I wish I had access to a forum that multiple German women attended. I'd love to ask them exactly how to impress a German girl. I don't get a second chance at this, and failure is not an option. (Of course, given how mightily I struggle to impress American women, the likelihood that my odds will suddenly change in a distant land is slim to none.)

So, I imagine I could find these power adapters in the airport at Zurich? Do they run cheap? If it'd cost me significantly over, say, $20 U.S. to buy an adapter I probably just shouldn't bring my DS and/or my iPod. I could probably live without them.

Are there any particular bars, nightclubs, activities or events in Zurich, Munich or Salzburg that could be recommended? It's great to hear Munich has a bitchin' nightlife but I frankly have absolutely no idea what to do or where to go to access said nightlife. Of course one problem is that I'm splitting this trip between my family (for half the time) and myself (the other half) which means I'll never have a group of friends to bounce from place to place with. Is crime a huge deal in cities like Munich? Should I be worried about walking on my own at night?

EDIT: Also just for the record I am a huge Swiss cheese fan, but given that the extent of my experience with said cheese comes from processed American versions of the products, I wonder what it'll be like in Europe...

[Nikose Tyris]

Regarding Women:

You are not going to be around anyone that has any knowledge of who or what you are.

Invent the biggest, SEXIEST cover story and LIVE IT. American Businessman? No problem. Rich student, exploring and looking where to do his next photoshoot for GLAMOUR magazine? Totally easy.

Talk to ANY women, have them help invent a cover story, and bam. There's your trick for finding some casual hookups. It's like playing "Professions" at the bar with friends- just gotta sell the job they claim you have.


[THIS IS THE MOST EVIL ADVICE I HAVE EVER GIVEN. PLEASE DON'T LISTEN TO ME although it will probably work.]

[Professor Smarmiarty]

You can buy adaptors at airports but it'll be cheaper and easier to buy them from local hardware store. Cost about $5 NZ dollars so if rate holds up should cost about $2.50 US.
For crimewise I don't know bout Munich, I never had a problem in Berlin and I'm small fellow who would be a good target. Germany's fairly safe, fairly sure the crime rate is considerably lower than US. So if you do it home, you should be able to do it there.

If you trying to pick up chicks, I ndon't know. Same as everywhere really- don't try to hard, see what happens?
But if you looking for bars my usual trick which has worked so far in most cities I've been to- find the university or equivalent (should be easy) go drinking there when the night is just starting. Couple of things could happen- when bar is quiet you might be able to join up with other drinkers who'll invite you along or you'll be able to follow the crowds around as they move onto other bars. The other way is that normally there are a few major streets for night clubs, try and figure out where those are then just follow where the flow of people are. Or just google it beforehand to find good places to go.

[Corel]

...Well, this conversation has floated a bit off track.

I wish I had access to a forum that multiple German women attended. I'd love to ask them exactly how to impress a German girl. I don't get a second chance at this, and failure is not an option. (Of course, given how mightily I struggle to impress American women, the likelihood that my odds will suddenly change in a distant land is slim to none.)


You're majorly over thinking this. What impresses German girls is the pretty much the same that impresses American, Canadian, Spanish or whatever girls; mostly depends on the individual and what they like. Being interesting, confident, dressing good and being funny could also help your chances if you want something a bit more general.

To be a a bit more brutal if you have a hard time impressing women of your own country, you're probably going to find it just as hard anywhere else. Still, you do have the foreigner card and don't let social anxiety hold you back from doing things. You're on vacation, nobody is going to care if you make an ass of yourself. Go get 'em.

Saying that, send me $19.95 now and I can give you an easy to follow 10 step guide on how to pick up ladies.


Is crime a huge deal in cities like Munich? Should I be worried about walking on my own at night?


Oh heavens no. Germany is one of the safer countries in Europe. One of the few places in the world where I could walk around a city 2 at night and not have a care in the world.

[Krylo]

Hey, I was insulting non-German foods and cheese that was in imagination neon-orange. We can get Germany type bread here as well but it's totally nowhere near what I had in Germany.

I don't doubt that in the slightest, and saying, "Try German bread as it is awesome," is one thing, but saying, "American bread is for people without teeth," is kind of another. Same goes for the cheeses. I'm sure authentic German cheeses from Germany are probably a little better than what we can get here or shipped across the sea to us, but saying all American cheese tastes like plastic or implying it might kill you if you eat it because some of it is orange ruffles my feathers.

I guess as that cooking and eating are both something of hobbies for me I take a little offense at it.


BUUUT this is slightly off topic, so I'll just stop caring now.

[BitVyper]

Don't listen to any of these fuckers about German women. They either don't know, or don't want to share the secret with you.

Okay, so first thing you're gonna do is put on the most colourful clothing you have. Something that nobody can possibly miss. Next go to a public area and get yourself a nice, visible spot with good lighting. Now fan out your tailfeathers and start to turn a circle. You're gonna start slow with a few of your simpler calls and with luck you'll start to attract some attention. Now it's time to really turn on the juice. Spread out your arms and move them in semicircles vigorously while raising the tempo of your steps. Start to raise and lower your head while increasing your volume and the complexity of your calls - now is a good time to start using ones they haven't heard before, which should be easy since you're a foreigner. This is also a good point to start really shaking those tailfeathers. By now you should have attracted a choice specimen or two. At this point you're gonna wanna stop turning circles, and move the focus to the one you want. As you step toward her, continuing the dance, it should quickly become clear whether your mating call has been accepted or not. Either way, it's pretty much her show from here on out, so you just keep doin your thing.

Remember, if at first you don't succeed, try try again. If people treat you like a freak, it's just because they're trying to trick you into thinking this stuff isn't true so that you don't spread the knowledge to your filthy foreign friends.

[Osterbaum]

Seeing as the vast majority of you are from the US, I don't see how you let us get away with dissin' yo country at every turn.

[Krylo]

Most of it's true!

[A Zarkin' Frood]

I don't doubt that in the slightest, and saying, "Try German bread as it is awesome," is one thing, but saying, "American bread is for people without teeth," is kind of another.
I didn't mean to offend anyone by that, The American bread I tasted was just very very soft. That's why you wouldn't need teeth for it. I'm not saying it's bad.

[Professor Smarmiarty]

Most of it's true!

But everything I say is made up!

[Solid Snake]

Well, I'm off! I'll be gone for a week. (I'm sure you will all dearly miss me.)

BitVyper, I will totally take your advice and let you know how it works out. Those lovely frauleins will never know what hit 'em!

Here's to endless supplies of beer and weisswurst...and maybe, just once, finding myself in a culture that not only accepts but outright cherishes my love for techno music...

[BitVyper]

BitVyper, I will totally take your advice and let you know how it works out. Those lovely frauleins will never know what hit 'em!

Just make sure she's had a good meal before you mate. Either that, or be prepared to get the fuck out fast after you finish. Another little known fact about German women is that they practice Sexual Cannibalism. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sexual_cannibalism)

[Geminex]

Though it's illegal in the eastern states.

[Meister]

Armin Meiwes would beg to differ.

[Odjn]

Armin Meiwes would beg to differ.

Wasn't he a dude? And didn't he get a Rammstein song?

[Geminex]

And besides, that was in Essen! Meiwes was a Wessi.

...

How did our conversation slip from the quality of German foodstuffs to German sexual cannibalism?

[A Zarkin' Frood]

Come on, that's only natural. We basically went from eating to eating after sex.
Two of the four basic Fs are involved.

Wasn't he a dude? And didn't he get a Rammstein song?
Yes he was a dude, that didn't prevent him from attempting to eat a penis.
I could go on about how he couldn't chew it properly but that would just be gross.

[Meister]

How did our conversation slip from the quality of German foodstuffs to German sexual cannibalism?
No far stretch at all. If there's any one food Germany is famous for it's gotta be sausage.