Vajazzled...

[Tev]

Of all the crazy things I could have read on Fox News....this is not what I expected at all. (http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,591129,00.html)

It?s called Vajazzling. Like Bedazzling, you know? That infomercial about putting rhinestones on your clothes? Only this is no denim vest enhanced by a handheld machine that you can get for just $19.95 if you call right now. With vajazzling, you go into a high-end salon, get waxed bare, and are bejewled below the belt.

You know, I'm not sure which surprised me more: That Hewitt did it; that she went on national television and told everyone about it; or that such an activity exists at all. But there she was on The George Lopez Show letting it all hang out. OK -- not literally, of course. But she was talking all about it. She was so proud and giggly. She said she did it after a break-up to lift her spirits, and apparently it worked. Hewitt also shared her vajazzling tale on Chelsea Lately, The View and The Joy Behar Show. Girlfriend gets around.

I...well now I have something fun to chat with my girlfriend about. :shifty:

[krogothwolf]

That doesn't sound exactly...pleasurable from the guy who would be sticking it in her.

[Tev]

Eh, the columnist gave it a shot and she seemed happy enough...

So, after preparing my, ahem, canvas, I asked my significant other to give me a hand. Peel, position, press, and release. Viola, I was all jazzled! I have to admit, the whole idea seemed kind of kooky. But, you know what? It looks really great. Rather sexy, if I do say so myself. It certainly wasn't how I expected to spend my Monday afternoon. But, hey, I’m all for an adventure. And my lover dug it too. The whole experiment led to a little fooling around, in fact, during which no crystals were harmed.

I’m sure going to the salon is a bit of a different experience. But having had a Brazilian wax a number of times, I feel confident saying that being vajazzled couldn’t possibly be more intimate or bizarre. It’s still a stranger you’re paying to tidy things up and make you look pretty in a spot the general public is not welcome to view. The process may be weird, but the result is worth it.

Plenty of people will – or do – take issue with vajazzling. But I can’t see why. It’s harmless, as far as I can tell. Does it objectify women? Nope. Only other people can do that, not a simple salon service. A few well-placed jewels accomplish pretty much the same thing as sexy lingerie. If it makes a woman feel good, I’m all for it.

I’ve been vajazzled for a few days now and the adhesive is still going strong (although the instructions say you should leave the decals on for only eight hours. Yikes). Completely Bare says its version lasts at least five days. My next trip to New York City, I am definitely paying them a visit.

[bluestarultor]

I just broke three guys' brains with this. This is the best thing ever. XD

[Marc v4.0]

So....

Pimp My Vag...

[Tev]

I just broke three guys' brains with this. This is the best thing ever. XDI know right!?

[Krylo]

To be fair, you probably wouldn't have to say much more than "Jennifer Love Hewitt" and "Vagina" to break a lot of guys' minds.

"Glued crystals onto her," is just icing.

[Meister]

I see potential for men too. Ribbed for her pleasure.

[Tev]

I see potential for men too. Ribbed for her pleasure.Well, diamonds are a girl's best friend...

[krogothwolf]

Well, diamonds are a girl's best friend...

Diamonds would just wreck that shit!

[Grimpond]

Diamonds would just wreck that shit!

Like, in the good sense?

[Tev]

Diamonds would just wreck that shit!I just want you to know that the internet disagrees. I can't post a link here to prove it....but just be aware that there are diamond encrusted sex toys and they sell for about $40,000 after conversion from Euro's.

[krogothwolf]

I just want you to know that the internet disagrees. I can't post a link here to prove it....but just be aware that there are diamond encrusted sex toys and they sell for about $40,000 after conversion from Euro's.

At least grimpond got what I was going for.

[Tev]

To be fair, it could have gone either way.

[krogothwolf]

To be fair, it could have gone either way.

True, But I had to say something since both of you took it the opposite way. I'm wondering when someone will decided to go Bodazzl and bedazzle themselves from head to toe.

[Amake]

Of all the to me incomprehensible things people do to hide the natural beauty of their bodies, this is by far the one with the silliest name.

Yeah, that's all I've got. >_>

[Jagos]

... I am shocked speechless...

HOT!

[Tev]

... I am shocked speechless...Deep down I'm still surprised this is a Fox News link.

[Shyria Dracnoir]

My mind is currently failing at understanding how glueing craft store rhinestones around something that's colloquially described as a "meat curtain" can be construed as "sexy". And what happens if you loose one down there, especially if you decide to go with the geunine stones?

Of all the to me incomprehensible things people do to hide the natural beauty of their bodies, this is by far the one with the silliest name.

Yeah, that's all I've got. >_>

Have to second this as well.

[Tev]

About the only time this would stop being sexy is after a few days when the glue starts to lose hold and random bits start popping off and hair starts growing back in.

I mean, it's like the various kinds of pubic sculpting but it's sparkly. How is that not awesome?

[Fifthfiend]

Deep down I'm still surprised this is a Fox News link.

I don't know why on Earth you would be. Hourlong ragefests about IMMORAL LIBERALS followed by tabloidy bullshit from bottle-blondes in miniskirts are what made Fox News the ratings juggernaut that it is.

[Lyaer]

Can they do those googly eyes, too?

[batgirl]

So....

Pimp My Vag...

Am I the only one seeing Xzibit coming back into the limelight soon? I smell a spinoff!

I dunno about all this. God forbid someone is allergic to the adhesive and has a reaction. Try explaining yourself to a doctor or nurse or hell, an EMT and not expect them to bust out laughing.

"I was vajazzling myself and then I got all bloated and puffy and it began itching. I didn't even get to finish the cutesy star pattern with alternating sapphires and rhinestones!"

[PyrosNine]

Am I the only one seeing Xzibit coming back into the limelight soon? I smell a spinoff!


So...so...after we hear about how horribly unvajazzling this incredibly nice and trendy girl's private parts are, he shows up, checks it out, gets in and rides it back to the workshop?

[Premmy]

I see potential for men too. Ribbed for her pleasure.

"It makes my Dookie twinkle"

[Wigmund]

So...so...after we hear about how horribly unvajazzling this incredibly nice and trendy girl's private parts are, he shows up, checks it out, gets in and rides it back to the workshop?

http://www.yodawgiherdyou.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/05/mlgrlzy1yhrz86y6x4twdpjbo1_400.jpg

Pity I can't add glitter to the picture to be accurate.

[Bob The Mercenary]

Aw man, I want to make my dong look like a pylon.

[Kyanbu The Legend]

This is by far the strangest thing I have ever heard of. How this is sexy I may not ever know. And I'm too scared to dare go pic hunting for an example for some reason.

[Krylo]

http://guanabee.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/vajazzle-4.png

And it was completely painless.

[Kyanbu The Legend]

Still strange but I do understand why it would be considered sexy.

[Marc v4.0]

I fucking don't, looks like she's got goddamn scales or something! That's a frightening image!

[synkr0nized]

So...so...after we hear about how horribly unvajazzling this incredibly nice and trendy girl's private parts are, he shows up, checks it out, gets in and rides it back to the workshop?

And later reveals the cooler, Playstation 3, LCD monitors, and speaker system he put in there.

[Kyanbu The Legend]

And spinner rims complete with a tricked out neon light under the body and a wing on the trunk.

[Bob The Mercenary]

And spinner rims complete with a tricked out neon light under the body and a wing on the trunk.

Oh wow, could you imagine a light coming out of there? When her pants come off you hear a Hallelujah chorus. It'd be like banging a deity of some kind.

[Amake]

We're only a small step away from achieving the THX breasts of God herself.
(Yes I've been watching American Dad.)

[Meister]

Is "pimp my vagina" really the phrase you guys want to conjure up here

[Premmy]

"Trick out" doesn't sound much better.

[Wigmund]

Oh wow, could you imagine a light coming out of there? When her pants come off you hear a Hallelujah chorus. It'd be like banging a deity of some kind.

Or maybe banging Old Gregg

[Ecks]

I fucking don't, looks like she's got goddamn scales or something! That's a frightening image!

Some people are into that sort of thing... (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/FetishFuel)