News From The Future: Michael Bay Ruins Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

[Magus]

Web Space Link (http://www.mtv.com/news/articles/1640292/20100528/story.jhtml)

Michael Bay To Produce 'Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles' Reboot
'Transformers' director has plenty of experience adapting kid-focused properties for the big screen.

By Eric Ditzian

In the spring of 2009, at the same time that the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles celebrated their 25th anniversary as the gnarliest martial-arts-enabled reptiles in the pop culture universe, we got some news that Michelangelo and his buds would surely dub "wicked." A new live-action "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles" movie was in the works, almost two decades after the original.

Friday (May 28) brings word that the upcoming flick will be produced by a guy with more than a little experience adapting long-established kid-focused properties for the big screen: Michael Bay.

Deadline.com reports that Bay and his Platinum Dunes partners will take on producing duties after Paramount Pictures and Nickelodeon approached them with the property. Bay, of course, produced and directed two "Transformers" movies for Paramount and is ramping up to shoot a third one this summer.

Even before the movie was announced last year, MTV News spoke with "Turtles" co-creator Peter Laird about what a rebooted franchise might look like. "I can say that at this point there are a lot of positive feelings about a 'Batman Begins'-style 'reboot,' which would, of necessity, include a retelling of the Turtles' origin story," he said. "Having said that, I would also be into an all-new story, if it was decided that that was a more desirable direction. Either way is fine with me, to be honest!

"Simply telling the story of what happened in the first issue of the 'TMNT' comic book would be a pretty short movie, so I suspect other things from the Turtles' history in the comics might be brought into it," Laird continued. "I would not be unhappy to somehow see the tale of Baxter Stockman and the robotic 'mousers' folded into this movie, as well as some elements possibly setting up the TCRI connection for a possible sixth (or seventh) movie. But I think I'm getting a little ahead of myself there."

While I don't want to dismiss Bay out of hand (despite the thread title), I have absolutely no idea what he's going to do with this franchise. I can only predict run it into the ground, EXCEPT that in my experience of it, TMNT doesn't really lend itself to explosions, so it seems like he'd HAVE to ruin it in a different manner, which could lend itself to success.

In any case, I actually enjoyed the CGI TMNT that came out a few years ago, personally they should've kept going with that writer or director 'cause it wasn't half bad outside of the actual plot points (dialogue and characters were all handled well, the actual plot was stupid but everything else was actually awesome).

[krogothwolf]

I guess Foot Soldiers will have to be robots, to fill the explosion quota in a Bay film.

I enjoyed the CGI one too, but not as much as the cheesy live action ones, god I loved those ones.

[tacticslion]

I guess Foot Soldiers will have to be robots, to fill the explosion quota in a Bay film.

I enjoyed the CGI one too, but not as much as the cheesy live action ones, god I loved those ones.

What do you mean? Footsoldiers were (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wvpQgGT1KcY) always (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Reiz50M-MC0) Over the years, Saki, who became known as The Shredder, moved to the USA, allied himself with the alien warlord Krang, and replaced the human Foot Ninja with robotic Foot Soldiers. (emphasis added)! Anything else is naught but lies and chicanery!

(Edit: Source of Quote (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Foot_Clan)! Ooh, yeah, take that! Buuuuurrrrrrrnnnn.... ... ... yeah I've no idea where I was going with that either.

[Daimo Mac, The Blue Light of Hope]

*sigh*

Alright I am gonna commit seppuku. Who wants to join me? There'll be Kool-Aid!

[Magus]

They could blow up the Technodrome at the end. But that means that Krang and Bebop and the Technodrome will be in it and that will just lead to horribleness in the hands of Bay, since more competent people couldn't even handle it (and those "competent" people were people writing for a children's cartoon, so you know Bay's bad!

[Marc v4.0]

You'd think the man was Uwe or something, jesus

[Wigmund]

If Krang is in the Bay Turtle movie, he damn well better have his android body.

However, since this is gonna be a Bay movie...who's up to play April O'Neil?

[Donomni]

You know, I'm gonna be hopeful about this.

Mostly because I enjoyed the Transformers movies and I have lower-middle-class tastes in quality.

But, honestly, I don't think he'll ruin it. Hell, I don't think he can(Not completely, anyways). I mean, besides not ever having enough explosions, TMNT kinda lends itself to his insanity. He turns his movies into saturday morning cartoons, and TMNT more-or-less is a saturday morning cartoon.

[bluestarultor]

All I can think of is my future reaction if I ever see this:

"Wha?! But- but shurikens don't explode! What the- oh, my God, shaky-cam! I think I'm going to hurl! Is- is that- that is TOTALLY NOT HOW MIKEY TALKS! HE ISN'T RAPH! YOU ARE RUINING EVERYTHING!"

Then it just cuts to me curled up on the floor of the movie theater while the credits roll, crying, feeling so, so dirty and used.




In all seriousness, Michael Bay is wrong for this material. He got away with Transformers because he could do a lot of explosions and fill it up with tanks and push trying to nail the iconic characters by the wayside in favor of a generic human story. He bullshat his way through most of it. You just can't do that with the Turtles. Every person with any experience with the franchise, meaning pretty much every person who was neither a coma patient nor living under a rock, and especially every person thirty and younger, is probably going to see it and see it manhandled. Turtles, in any continuity, is an icon in its own right, and unlike Transformers, it's something that has a near-universal market. You simply do not grow up without them. I honestly don't think Bay can handle that faithfully.

[Aerozord]

who wants to bet April is reduced to one-dimensional love interest.

and that the Turtles are used more as a plot device then as the stars

[Tev]

who wants to bet April is reduced to one-dimensional love interest.
I'd just like to say that I was against the idea of "samurai-ninja-archeologist" April of the last computer animated movie. I want my reported back!

[Sky Warrior Bob]

No, no no... (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8IXCK1EyP4s&feature=player_embedded)

Yeah, that's my reaction too.

SWB

[Krylo]

April will be Megan Fox and Casey Jones will be played by Shia LaBeouf.

[Premmy]

April will be Megan Fox and Casey Jones will be played by Shia LaBeouf.

Never thought I'd see the day where I'd demand LESS Casey Jones for something.

[Daimo Mac, The Blue Light of Hope]

April will be Megan Fox and Casey Jones will be played by Shia LaBeouf.

You shut your dirty whore mouth right now!

[BloodyMage]

Doesn't Michael Bay hate Megan Fox? He's not going to cast her in another of his movies... is he?

[Aerozord]

Doesn't Michael Bay hate Megan Fox? He's not going to cast her in another of his movies... is he?

guy also hated the transformers franchise, we all know how that ended

[Daimo Mac, The Blue Light of Hope]

guy also hated the transformers franchise, we all know how that ended

You mean a 20% rating on Rotten Tomatoes for Transformers 2? (http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/transformers_revenge_of_the_fallen/)

[Sky Warrior Bob]

April will be Megan Fox and Casey Jones will be played by Shia LaBeouf.

Megan Fox is out for TF3 (http://www.deadline.com/2010/05/michael-bays-revenge-no-more-megan/), in case you didn't know. I don't know the full details, but I think they all revolve around an interview that Megan gave & the crew reaction. This article gives highlights (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/09/13/megan-fox-branded-dumb-as_n_285005.html).

SWB

[Token]

Bluesy, Bluesy, Bluesy. I'm pretty sure exploding shurikens were used to great effect in Turtles Forever, which as we all know was fuckwin.

[krogothwolf]

You mean a 20% rating on Rotten Tomatoes for Transformers 2? (http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/transformers_revenge_of_the_fallen/)

Man, that movie was awesome. It had everything you could ask for, Explosions, Fights, Optimus Prime getting killed, being resurrected by a power surge(yet they couldn't do that to Jazz?) Shia dieing, getting resurrected by mystical dead transformers. Optimus prime killing the fallen because only a prime can kill a prime....so wait...how did Optimus die...and if Only a Prime can kill a prime, why wouldn't he just smash everyone else by himself? And then they had the humans blow stuff up with there awesome new technology on a battleship, totally destroyed a pyramid too ya know! Oh, and they had a Transformer that could totally transform into a human with a tail! See, the movie was so full of win, how could it only get 20%?

I wonder which turtle will die in the movie? Or maybe splinter will die.....

[Daimo Mac, The Blue Light of Hope]

Man, that movie was awesome. It had everything you could ask for, Explosions, Fights, Optimus Prime getting killed, being resurrected by a power surge(yet they couldn't do that to Jazz?) Shia dieing, getting resurrected by mystical dead transformers. Optimus prime killing the fallen because only a prime can kill a prime....so wait...how did Optimus die...and if Only a Prime can kill a prime, why wouldn't he just smash everyone else by himself? And then they had the humans blow stuff up with there awesome new technology on a battleship, totally destroyed a pyramid too ya know! Oh, and they had a Transformer that could totally transform into a human with a tail! See, the movie was so full of win, how could it only get 20%?

I wonder which turtle will die in the movie? Or maybe splinter will die.....


I tip my hat to you. You are the king of Sarcasm!

[BloodyMage]

Megan Fox is out for TF3 (http://www.deadline.com/2010/05/michael-bays-revenge-no-more-megan/), in case you didn't know. I don't know the full details, but I think they all revolve around an interview that Megan gave & the crew reaction. This article gives highlights (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/09/13/megan-fox-branded-dumb-as_n_285005.html).

SWB

She's also been reportedly replaced with some Victorian Secret model called Rosie Huntington-Whiteley (http://www.latinoreview.com/news/and-megan-fox-s-replacement-is-10045). Acting doesn't seem to be a requirement for these roles in Bay's films, so it doesn't exactly bode well for April.

[Aerozord]

well lets be honest her character was just a bouncing set of tits. I'd be upset if they gave it to someone thats actually good, be a waste of talent

[krogothwolf]

well lets be honest her character was just a bouncing set of tits. I'd be upset if they gave it to someone thats actually good, be a waste of talent

But but she has that one facial expression she use in every scene! You can't replace that one facial expression. It'll be impossible!

[Daimo Mac, The Blue Light of Hope]

I wonder which turtle will die in the movie? Or maybe splinter will die.....

I may be wrong here, but didn't splinter die in the original run of the Laird comics?

[Kim]

I think they were trying to avenge their master in the Mirage comics, yeah. Of course, everything I know about the Mirage comics I know from Turtles Forever, so take that with a grain of salt.

[krogothwolf]

I may be wrong here, but didn't splinter die in the original run of the Laird comics?

Old Age in the current run of "original" comics.

[Sky Warrior Bob]

One thing that just occurred to me... Not sure if everyone is aware of this, but Eastman/Laird sold/lost the rights to TMNT & now they are in the domain of Nickelodeon (http://g4tv.com/thefeed/blog/post/700117/nickelodeon-purchases-teenage-mutant-ninja-turtles-franchise.html).

So not only is Bay in charge of this, Nickelodeon is the studio he'll be representing. And frankly, that makes it all the more scary.

SWB

[Daimo Mac, The Blue Light of Hope]

One thing that just occurred to me... Not sure if everyone is aware of this, but Eastman/Laird sold/lost the rights to TMNT & now they are in the domain of Nickelodeon (http://g4tv.com/thefeed/blog/post/700117/nickelodeon-purchases-teenage-mutant-ninja-turtles-franchise.html).

So not only is Bay in charge of this, Nickelodeon is the studio he'll be representing. And frankly, that makes it all the more scary.

SWB

Didn't Nick produce the new TMNT cartoon, which for the most part more accurate to the comics then the 80's version?

Don't get me wrong as I love the original turtles cartoon, but I am just curious regarding that fact.

[Aerozord]

Nickelodeon can do some pretty solid TV shows, remember these are the people that did Avatar. Still I cant even think of one great movie they'd done. Decent movies yea, but nothing memorable

[krogothwolf]

The old turtles cartoon was hilarious in that it didn't take itself seriously.

The first 3 or 4 seasons of the the new turtles cartoon was good because it was fairly well done and it took itself serious to a point.

Combing the Old, New and Comics was awesome because, the new turtles weren't as serious as the actual comic ones and the old turtles were such a fucking joke they were annoying to the point of hilarity! Turtles Forever was an actual sweet movie to be honest.

Also, Don't forget Nick did AAAAH! Real Monsters and Rocko's Modern life.

[bluestarultor]

Didn't Nick produce the new TMNT cartoon, which for the most part more accurate to the comics then the 80's version?

Don't get me wrong as I love the original turtles cartoon, but I am just curious regarding that fact.

4Kids, actually. Shocking, I know.

Or is the CG one running yet?

[Sky Warrior Bob]

Didn't Nick produce the new TMNT cartoon, which for the most part more accurate to the comics then the 80's version?

Don't get me wrong as I love the original turtles cartoon, but I am just curious regarding that fact.

I forget who did it, but at the time of the change it was made clear that it wasn't Nick. Not sure who.... (apparently, it was a 4Kids production.) Although, I did hear that one of the original creators was heavily involved in its creation.

You might find this blog post (http://tmntentity.blogspot.com/2009/12/25-greatest-moments-in-tmnt-history.html) of interest, its the 25 greatest moments in TMNT history (per the opinion of the writer).'

SWB

[Professor Smarmiarty]

Man turtles forever was pretty sweet actually.

[Daimo Mac, The Blue Light of Hope]

I forget who did it, but at the time of the change it was made clear that it wasn't Nick. Not sure who.... (apparently, it was a 4Kids production.) Although, I did hear that one of the original creators was heavily involved in its creation.

You might find this blog post (http://tmntentity.blogspot.com/2009/12/25-greatest-moments-in-tmnt-history.html) of interest, its the 25 greatest moments in TMNT history (per the opinion of the writer).'

SWB

Thanks for the read. it kinda makes me wanna track down the comics to give it a good solid read through.

Man turtles forever was pretty sweet actually.

And anyone who says otherwise needs to get their head kicked in.

[krogothwolf]

Thanks for the read. it kinda makes me wanna track down the comics to give it a good solid read through.


I remember this one comic, it was Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles meet Archie...it was the worst thing I ever found as a kid and made me tear it up in disgust. It took me forever to get over my fear of crossovers after that.

[Professor Smarmiarty]

http://atopfourthwall.blogspot.com/2010/05/tmnt-meets-archie.html In case anyone curious.

[krogothwolf]

http://atopfourthwall.blogspot.com/2010/05/tmnt-meets-archie.html In case anyone curious.

I hate you.....I realllly hate you!

[Intern Nin]

Bay?! Freaking Bay?! B-but I thought they already picked out Spike Jonze as director for the new movie and had casting calls for Foot ninja and all that other stuff! Wha... I... This...

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUI'm over it.

Eh, it's not great news to be sure, but things could be worse.

[Aerozord]

if anyone knows where I can watch/download turtle forever please let me know. I am so out of the loop I didn't even know it was done

[Intern Nin]

Youtube or the 4kids website, take your pick.

[Magus]

They seem to repeat it once a month Saturday mornings on the CW, too. Or at least it was on this past Saturday (I didn't watch it, though).

Didn't Archie meet the Punisher too? That idea seems like it was consciously made fully aware that it is a terrible idea, though, so it was probably done for humor's sake. The TMNT one was probably done without thinking through the consequences of such an action.

[Aerozord]

you know that blog also reminded me of something. While I do like how Casey was given depth that the original cartoon version lacked, http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v135/aerozord/Number07.jpg