Your Perfect Syfy Channel Original Movie Title?

[Lumenskir]

So Syfy is running some 'contest' that lets the eight drunken guys interested in their original movies to name and 'write' a few of the script ideas they have in pre-production currently. I'd link to the actual contest, but it's pretty stupid and pointless.

However, it gives me the chance to indulge in one of my favorite pastimes: Coming up with the perfect title for a Syfy Original Movie.

Now, based on the sample size of my roommates who also enjoy this game, there doesn't seem to be a 'proper' way to accomplish this, but there are a few noticeable categories to try. For instance, my perfect title is Humantaray because I think the simple [Title Monster] format is the best and least misleading. However, I can also see the beauty and worth of the [Thing v. Other Thing] style (like my friend's contribution, Mutant Mongoose v. Cyber Snakes). I don't personally like titles that try to be funny with preestablished entities (the only reason I usually laugh at my roommate's The South Will Rise Again suggestion is because he has to explain that it's about Confederate zombies who deliberately avoid killing the black guy so they don't have to eat his brain) nor those that are just mashing of real titles (20,000 Leagues to the Center of the Earth for example) because I really appreciate having at least some idea of what I'm going to be blearily watching and making fun of the for next two hours.

[Kim]

Cyber-Christ: A group of Christian scientists decide that Jesus is taking too long to come back, so they recreate him using cyber-organics and cloning technology.

[Magus]

Whalastodon: Death by Land and Sea

Whalastadon is a furry hybrid mutant whale/mastadon creature created by scientists in an attempt to create a creature capable of surviving the ice seas of Europa in an attempt to send it on a mission to explore the moon with a camera cybernetically implanted in its eye. It escapes into the ocean however and attacks the Japanese heroe's whaling ship with its razor tusks (the fact that it never does anything by land is never mentioned). The heroic Japanese whaler must take it down with his secret weapon: explosive harpoons. Cue dramatic finale.

[Aerozord]

depends, are we looking for what would be good, or what would match the usual quality?

If its good then, Bruce Campbell The Movie. Which is done in the style of a documentary that follows him around through a typical day of being awesome and fighting supernatural creatures

Something their usual standard. Just use their naming conventions and it writes itself. Nuclear Crocodile vs Super Gator

[Sithdarth]

They already actually have Dinocroc vs Supergator coming up if that is what you are referring to.

[Aerozord]

actually Sith I was not aware, which just goes to prove it is indeed the usual type of movie they release

[Bells]

Let me see a few....

"Reign of the Croc People"

Think Mole People, but they are Half-Crocodile.

"The Omega Virus"

A Prehistoric Virus that melts people brains!

"Assassin from Planet X"

Imagine an Alien Serial Killer that is Sentenced to be dropped on the Sun, but manages to scape and crashes on Earth.

"Biocop"

It's robocop, but instead of being a Cyborg, the Cop is saved by getting Alien Organs transplanted into him as a Government experiment. Now he has Psychic abilities and the other Aliens are trying to get him.

[Sithdarth]

actually Sith I was not aware, which just goes to prove it is indeed the usual type of movie they release

It's showing June 26th if you want to laugh at it.

[Yumil]

If its good then, Bruce Campbell The Movie. Which is done in the style of a documentary that follows him around through a typical day of being awesome and fighting supernatural creatures

My Name is Bruce is the closest you are ever going to get to that.

[Carade]

"The Deathnauts"

A group of angels of death have been wronged by God and declare war on heaven. After shooting their way through slews of angels (Yes, I mean an hour and a half of angel killing) they eventually fight God himself and before landing the final blow the main Angel (Chris) says, "Go to hell."

It's all so beautiful that when I finished typing I began to weep.

[EVILNess]

Captain Phineas and the Space Weasels 2: Rondentia

Yeah, that's all I got off the top of my head.

[Nique]

"Bloodtastic" (Something about half-naked female vampires. Probably.)

"Thrill-O-Vision" (A beat-you-over-the-head-metaphor for mass media wherein viewers of "thrill-o-vision" are turned into cyber-zombies and controlled by corporate-giant-turned-evil-genius, Max Power (double parenthesis, yes I know it's a Simpsons reference))

"Zombie-High School" (obvious)

"Dinosaurus Rex : The ReXoning" (Scientists combine the DNA of EVERY carnivorous dinosaur into the ultimate predator. What happens next is... Dino-tastic!)

Actually I'm sort of loving that last one. I need a really bad actor to read the line:"Imagine the sheer and raw power of the Tyrannosaurus combined with the cunning bloodlust of a Raptor, and also the wings of a Pterodactyl!"

[phil_]

"Zombie-High School" (obvious)I can't help but point out that Highschool of the Dead is getting an anime on July 5th. Tune in, yo. The comic's pretty boss if you can stand the fanservice.

[Nique]

Cool, I'll check it out.

Also, The sequel to Dinosaurous Rex will be 'Dinosaurous Rex : Dinopocalypse'

[Yumil]

I can't help but point out that Highschool of the Dead is getting an anime on July 5th. Tune in, yo. The comic's pretty boss if you can stand the fanservice.

The fanservice is extremely strong seeing as though the artist does a fair bit of hentai.

[Karrrrrrrrrrrresche]

I can't help but point out that Highschool of the Dead is getting an anime on July 5th. Tune in, yo. The comic's pretty boss if you can stand the fanservice.

Are you trying to say the fanservice isn't the best part?

[Shyria Dracnoir]

"Dinosaurus Rex : The ReXoning" (Scientists combine the DNA of EVERY carnivorous dinosaur into the ultimate predator. What happens next is... Dino-tastic!)

Actually I'm sort of loving that last one. I need a really bad actor to read the line:"Imagine the sheer and raw power of the Tyrannosaurus combined with the cunning bloodlust of a Raptor, and also the wings of a Pterodactyl!"

Throw in some lasers and Nazis and I will fund this myself.

[Magus]

Dinosaurus Rex seems exactly like something they would do and I'm surprised hasn't been done yet.

[Sporticus]

http://tv.ign.com/articles/110/1101015p1.html

Not only do we get to pick the title, but it gets better/worse:

We get to pick everything about the movie.

[Kroze Gamegod]

Theodore Rex 2: Like Dino, Like Son

I win... so many times over...

[Sporticus]

"Instigator: Rise of Felicia Day"

[Archbio]

None of these proposed titles are using the rules of kool spelling as set out in Syfy Channel's very name. I'm disapppointed in you all.

For example, it should be spelled D-nosoroos.

[Magus]

It's not as open as I expected, you just get to vote on three to four general choices. I don't think you'll even get to put in specific names, just vote on five possible titles or something.

Anyway, what we do know is there is a 33.333% Sci-Fi is making a movie about the Bermuda Triangle, a 66.666% chance Sci-Fi is making a movie about an alien, and a 99.999% chance Sci-Fi is making a movie that is going to be terrible.

[Lumenskir]

It's not as open as I expected, you just get to vote on three to four general choices. I don't think you'll even get to put in specific names, just vote on five possible titles or something.
Hence the explicit non-linking. Me and my friends first started playing this game when SyFy said we could "Name Your Own Movie" but it was really just to crowdsource naming a specific Crusade-era demon movie. And even when we got over our initial disappointment and tried to play by their rules, the fact that they didn't accept Crusadistic or Djinn and Tunic means they're obviously rigged.

SyFy's actual contests are bullshit, basically.

[Aldurin]

Stultophobia

It means the fear of stupid people. Essentially a brainwave disruptor kills everyone with above-average I.Q. and now the idiots of the earth are getting organized (as much as they can) to take over the world, starting with the leadership positions in the most powerful countries.

Link to where I got the word. (http://wiki.answers.com/Q/What_is_the_fear_of_stupid_people)

[Aerozord]

Stultophobia

It means the fear of stupid people. Essentially a brainwave disruptor kills everyone with above-average I.Q. and now the idiots of the earth are getting organized (as much as they can) to take over the world, starting with the leadership positions in the most powerful countries.

Link to where I got the word. (http://wiki.answers.com/Q/What_is_the_fear_of_stupid_people)

why? they already rule the world

[Aldurin]

why? they already rule the world

What? This can't be!! How come we haven't nuked countries that look bad on the globe yet? This can't be true until that happens.

[Lumenskir]

Stultophobia
While a decent-ish enough idea for a independent B-Movie, it's a bit above what you can expect from a SyFy movie. You need a title that the announcer can intone after describing the main threat, all in the space of a third grade level sentence.

Hence why Humantaray is the objectively best title.

[Odjn]

Invasion of the butt snatchers.

[Aerozord]

sounds like a gay porno