The Expendables 2 Has Chuck Norris, that is all.

[Bells]

DAT CAST - From Wikipedia


Sylvester Stallone as Barney Ross

Jean-Claude Van Damme as Jean Vilain[1][2]
Main villain,[3][4] leader of an opposing team of mercenaries.[5] Van Damme had previously been offered a role in The Expendables but failed to come to an agreement with Stallone and ultimately never took part.[6] Commenting on the role, Stallone said "We’ll have a big showdown between me and Van Damme, which has been anticipated for a long time, so it should be a good one."[2]

Jason Statham as Lee Christmas[7]

Dolph Lundgren as Gunnar Jensen[7]

Randy Couture as Toll Road

Scott Adkins as Hector

Jean Vilain's right hand man.[8] Adkins was confirmed on September 22, 2011.[9]

Terry Crews as Hale Caesar

Bruce Willis as Mr. Church
In late August 2011, Stallone stated his interest in having Willis return for a role in the sequel — expanding upon his brief cameo in the original — potentially as a "super villain".[10] Willis' was confirmed to be involved in a "substantial" role on September 6, 2011.[11][12] Commenting on the film, Willis said "Hopefully, they'll start shooting it while we're young enough to survive."[13]

Arnold Schwarzenegger as Trent Mauser
Stallone noted his intention to have Schwazenegger return for a sequel before the release of The Expendables, stating "If this works, I would love to get him in the next one".[14] Schwarzennegger's involvement was confirmed on September 6, 2011, his "substantial" role expanding on his cameo in the original film.[11] Schwarzenegger filmed his scenes in 4 days.[15]

Jet Li as Yin Yang

Liam Hemsworth
A sniper.[16] Hemsworth was confirmed for the role on September 19, 2011.[17]

Chuck Norris as Booker[18][1][19]

Yu Nan[20] as Maggie

So, Movie Bob from the Escapist is going to have a heart attack, and i'm going to watch the manliest man-bro movie of all time :dance:

[BitVyper]

I dunno, Expendables kind of failed to capture the 80s machismo that would have made it a really great movie. It was still pretty good, but eh, I dunno if I'm that excited to see another one coming.

[Professor Smarmiarty]

Holy shit. LUNDGREN VS JCVD. FIGHT OF THE CENTURY.

[Betty Elms]

Am I the only one exhausted with having thirty and early fourty-somethings using their new found influence over popular culture to constantly beat me over the head with "YOU KNOW WHAT WAS AWESOME? THE '80S. CAN YOU NAME A BETTER MOVIE THAT HAS EVER BEEN MADE THAN GHOSTBUSTERS? YOU CAN'T! UNLESS YOU SAID BAAACK TOOO THEEE FUUUUTUUUUREEEE!!!!"

And then all of the other thirty and early fourty-somethings go "aha I knew it!" and take that as their cue to jack off all over the media, and I, the twenty-something, just have to sit through it and listen to people acting like Weird Science wasn't balls.

[Jagos]

But then, wasn't the 90s and early millenium a throwback to the 70s?

[Kerensky287]

The Expendables was pretty neat, but I didn't feel it was over-the-top enough.

[Professor Smarmiarty]

Am I the only one exhausted with having thirty and early fourty-somethings using their new found influence over popular culture to constantly beat me over the head with "YOU KNOW WHAT WAS AWESOME? THE '80S. CAN YOU NAME A BETTER MOVIE THAT HAS EVER BEEN MADE THAN GHOSTBUSTERS? YOU CAN'T! UNLESS YOU SAID BAAACK TOOO THEEE FUUUUTUUUUREEEE!!!!"

And then all of the other thirty and early fourty-somethings go "aha I knew it!" and take that as their cue to jack off all over the media, and I, the twenty-something, just have to sit through it and listen to people acting like Weird Science wasn't balls.

You like Heman and theMasters of the Universe right though? And Rocky 4?
Those other movies are terrible because they don't star Dolph Lundgren? That's your point right?

[Darth SS]

Holy shit JCVD. Boxing vs Kick Boxing. Did anyone ever see JCVD's return to K1? Because he totally wrecked some poor guy. It was painful to watch.

CHUCK NORRIS IS IN THIS MOVIE TOO!? Too. Much. AAAGH
http://i.imgur.com/E9fI3.gif

[Azisien]

Expendables was somehow beyond atrocious, but Stallone can reload really fast which was cool.

On a bright note, this lowers my expectations for a sequel down near "The Pleasures of Licking Slime Molds," which means I might come out enjoying it if it is half-competent!

[BitVyper]

You like Heman and theMasters of the Universe right though? And Rocky 4?
Those other movies are terrible because they don't star Dolph Lundgren? That's your point right?

Masters of the Universe is objectively the best movie ever made.

[Marc v4.0]

Am I the only one exhausted with having thirty and early fourty-somethings using their new found influence over popular culture to constantly beat me over the head with "YOU KNOW WHAT WAS AWESOME? THE '80S. CAN YOU NAME A BETTER MOVIE THAT HAS EVER BEEN MADE THAN GHOSTBUSTERS? YOU CAN'T! UNLESS YOU SAID BAAACK TOOO THEEE FUUUUTUUUUREEEE!!!!"

And then all of the other thirty and early fourty-somethings go "aha I knew it!" and take that as their cue to jack off all over the media, and I, the twenty-something, just have to sit through it and listen to people acting like Weird Science wasn't balls.

You seem to be implying that Ghostbusters and Back to the Future weren't fucking rad.

I will kindly ask you to stop, miss

[Locke cole]

I dunno, Expendables kind of failed to capture the 80s machismo that would have made it a really great movie. It was still pretty good, but eh, I dunno if I'm that excited to see another one coming.

Who knows? They may hit upon the right formula this time. We can but wait and see, right?

As for '80s stuff... I was actually born in 1990, so all I know of the '80s is Saturday Morning Cartoons that I watched way back when that bled over the decade line, and a couple of classic movies that took me over a decade to finally go and see.

Long story short, some of the only things I really remember from the '80s are Thundercats, all of 5 episodes of He-Man, Swat Kats, and the like.

[Betty Elms]

You seem to be implying that Ghostbusters and Back to the Future weren't fucking rad.
They are pretty rad. I just find that memetic mob mentality irksome, whether it's a decade or zombies or Lovecraft or some other thing that's admittedly pretty awesome but jesus christ get over it. So yeah, I probably won't see this movie.

Although I guess eventually I'll get my revenge. Ten years from now we are never going to shut up about Pokemon.

[stefan]

Ten years from now we are never going to shut up about Pokemon.

The Pokemon Retrofad is already here.

[Betty Elms]

The Pokemon Retrofad is already here.

Oh man, just you wait. It's gonna be fucking obscene.

[Fifthfiend]

I think the key issue here is that Pokemon is and has always been shit and Ghostbusters / BttF are five of the greatest movies ever.

[Fifthfiend]

Like I'm sure Pokemon 2024 will happen and that it'll make a billion trillion dollars I'm just saying I don't know why you're comparing that shit to anything with Dan Ackroyd and Bill Murray in the same movie when Michael Bay and his bloranged leBoufed atrocities are right there.

[The Sevenshot Kid]

I think the key issue here is that Pokemon is and has always been shit and Ghostbusters / BttF are five of the greatest movies ever.

Four. Four of the greatest movies ever.

[Fifthfiend]

Fuck you G2 owned.

[The Sevenshot Kid]

Fuck you G2 owned.

It did, but it just so happened to be the same movie as the first one.

[The Sevenshot Kid]

The fact that you know I'm talking about G2 speaks volumes.

[Fifthfiend]

Speaks volumes to you can go fuck yourself.

[Marc v4.0]

The fact that you know I'm talking about G2 speaks volumes.

I only assumed that because people always seem to be down on it even though it isn't bad at all.

Ok, so what if it is the same Movie as the first one? That's like bitching because someone made you the best sandwich ever one day and then, the next day, made a sandwich EXACTLY AS AWESOME AS THE FIRST.

[Betty Elms]

Like I'm sure Pokemon 2024 will happen and that it'll make a billion trillion dollars I'm just saying I don't know why you're comparing that shit to anything with Dan Ackroyd and Bill Murray in the same movie when Michael Bay and his bloranged leBoufed atrocities are right there.

That would be a broken analogy. The Transformers films, great and towering constructs of insanity and hackery jutting into the heavens like the throbbing cock of capitalist art, are throwbacks to the original franchise. In this scenario, Pokemon is the original franchise. So when "Pokemon: Women are Objects and Shit Blows Up" comes out, you can compare the quality of the two. (Or rather, you can compare how much money each one makes seeing as that is the plane on which they function.)

Right now I'm just bitching about the vice like grip nostalgia has on pop-culture. It's just wank wank wank wank wank and unless you fall within the proper age range you get wanked all over and it's sticky and uncomfortable and Thundercats doesn't stop being garbage.

[stefan]

I only assumed that because people always seem to be down on it even though it isn't bad at all.

toastersex

[The Sevenshot Kid]

toastersex

I actually found that hilarious.

[Bells]

And on topical news, i just want to remind people that this man is a vilain in this movie

http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lhyet1c3NY1qf1dx3.gif

So, i really can't see why the hell you would think this could suck

[Krylo]

And on topical news, i just want to remind people that this man is a vilain in this movie

http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lhyet1c3NY1qf1dx3.gif

So, i really can't see why the hell you would think this could suck

Because it's not being written and directed by the same people who did RED.

Edit: I mean, at least Stallone isn't getting a writer or director credit according to IMDB so it has a better chance than the first one had, but really.

[01d55]

The problem with expecting Pokemon nostalgia is Pokemon never went away. It's like expecting Mario nostalgia.

[Marc v4.0]

toastersex

Ghost. Blowjob.

[Krylo]

In related news:Thundercats doesn't stop being garbage.

The more you type the more I like you.

[Locke cole]

Yeah, the new one is actually pretty good.

I kind of wish someone would pick up Swat Kats, though. I remember it being like some sort of unholy combination of Ninja Turtles, Spiderman, and Batman, and it worked, somehow.

[stefan]

Ghost. Blowjob.

one was a dream sequence. the other actually happened in universe.

[Marc v4.0]

If you're 12 and think "Sleep with" automatically means "hurr durr sexed with his penis" instead of just spooning.

[The Sevenshot Kid]

If you're 12 and think "Sleep with" automatically means "hurr durr sexed with his penis" instead of just spooning.

Would you really put it past Akroyd?

[Magus]

Yeah, the new one is actually pretty good.

I kind of wish someone would pick up Swat Kats, though. I remember it being like some sort of unholy combination of Ninja Turtles, Spiderman, and Batman, and it worked, somehow.

Anthropomorphic cats flying fighter jets...I can see TMNT and Batman, but Spiderman would be a stretch.

Also that was a '90s cartoon. The decade when cartoons actually were drawn and animated half-way decently.

That said, it was one of my least favorite '90s cartoons. And keep in mind this was the era of Street Sharks and Biker Mice From Mars.

I didn't like the first Expendables. I couldn't understand half of what the characters were saying (like it was pretty bad that Jet Li was actually way more understandable than some of the garbled mess that came out of the inexplicable wrestlers' mouths, and I didn't understand half of what Stallone said, either), there were "jokes" that weren't actually funny, and the plot was pretty bad, even in the realm of action movie plots. To me, something like Punisher: War Zone already captured the best part of the '80s, namely over-the-top, hilariously ridiculous, brutal kills, while having better acting and characters than The Expendables.

That said, the original had some good moments (anything involving Jason Statham, the Jet Li/Dolph Lundgren fight and...wait that's it), so it's not impossible for this one to maybe manage to be half-way decent.

[Kyanbu The Legend]

Yeah, the new one is actually pretty good.

I kind of wish someone would pick up Swat Kats, though. I remember it being like some sort of unholy combination of Ninja Turtles, Spiderman, and Batman, and it worked, somehow.

Because it was fucking awesome, that's why!

NEVER forget that.

[Locke cole]

Anthropomorphic cats flying fighter jets...I can see TMNT and Batman, but Spiderman would be a stretch.

Spiderman because their "Commissioner Gordon" was playing the J.J.J.-patented "threat or menace?" card all the time.

[Professor Smarmiarty]

Re ghostbusters back to the futre.
While ghostbusters is still pretty enjoyable go watch back to the future as not a child. It won't be anywhere near as good as you remember it. As in, its decidely average.

[Fifthfiend]

Spiderman because their "Commissioner Gordon" was playing the J.J.J.-patented "threat or menace?" card all the time.

Also I'm pretty sure they grapple-hooked their jet to a building and swung from it Spider-Man style on at least one occasion.

[Kim]

Hearing Chuck Norris is in this makes me not want to watch it.

I mean, I probably wouldn't have anyways, but now I will actively avoid it.

[Magus]

Man, hearing about all this '90s v. '80s thing, plus Ghostbusters, makes me remember how awesome the Ghostbusters cartoon was, and then how much MORE awesome Ghostbusters XTREME was.

It just seems like the '90s has the '80s beat by a bit (cartoon wise).

Chuck Norris doesn't make me feel good or bad towards The Expendables. At least we will be able to understand what he says.

Also the movie seems to be missing Steven Segal. I mean, yeah, he's degenerated to the point where he doesn't even do the martial arts anymore (his last movie I saw, straight to DVD of course, had a hilariously bad stunt double in a black wig and leather duster, about a hundred pounds lighter, doing literally everything that wasn't standing there and talking), but I kind of miss his squinty eyes and monotonal delivery of death threats promises.

[BloodyMage]

Re ghostbusters back to the futre.
While ghostbusters is still pretty enjoyable go watch back to the future as not a child. It won't be anywhere near as good as you remember it. As in, its decidely average.

It's actually sometimes more fun to watch as an adult because you pick up on smaller things. Like the allusion to Stanley Kubrick.


Also the movie seems to be missing Steven Segal. I mean, yeah, he's degenerated to the point where he doesn't even do the martial arts anymore (his last movie I saw, straight to DVD of course, had a hilariously bad stunt double in a black wig and leather duster, about a hundred pounds lighter, doing literally everything that wasn't standing there and talking), but I kind of miss his squinty eyes and monotonal delivery of death threats promises.

Wait for Expendables 3.

[Yrcrazypa]

Man, hearing about all this '90s v. '80s thing, plus Ghostbusters, makes me remember how awesome the Ghostbusters cartoon was, and then how much MORE awesome Ghostbusters XTREME was.



Ghostbusters cartoon? (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WYgO8LWKH4I)

[Magus]

Oh dear god no.

No wonder they called the real Ghostbusters cartoon THE REAL GHOSTBUSTERS.