A new low...

[G.I.R.]

We all know about the /pizza command from EQ2. Well, ThinkGeek.com has now raised... or should it lowered... the bar for all those gaming obsessed people who don't want to have to leave their desks ever again. I give you...


The latest in Internet Technology! (http://www.thinkgeek.com/cubegoodies/toys/7293/)

[h4x.m4g3]

Very soon we will never have to leave our desk again. Oh glorious day.

Honestly this is really really stupid. Are we that imbued with our gaming that we refuse to ever move again?

[Toastburner B]

Sooner or later, they are going to develope a still-suit, a la Dune, so that you never have to move to go to the bathroom, get a drink, or go to the fridge because it will be built into your desk.

[Arlia Janet]

The 'female adaptor' confuses and angers me on levels I cannot begin to understand.

Who the hell spends so much time on a computer and gets so into it that they simply CANNOT go to the bathroom? You have about a 1 hour grace period when you know that you'll have to go. I'm sure in that one hour you'll have a pause where you can say, "Hey, I'll be right back."
I have set up my laptop on a slightly modified desk so that I can still use it while on my exercise bike. That should be the wave of the future. Peripherals (mice, keyboards, etc) only work if you are moving some pedals.
This product is for dirty, lazy, pasty-white people.

[Loyal]

I find that product HIGHLY offensive to my lifestyle as a gamer.

TO AAAAAAARMS!!

[ZoneHunter1]

Rally men!! I'll get my 2x4 with the nail, and we shall smite the sinners for thier crimes!

[slightly aboveaverage man]

wow... just the words "Female adaptor" boggles the mind. Everything should have a female adaptor.

Seriously though, this is just sad. Why must they tell you that it holds the same amount as a Big Gulp? what, are they trying to give you ideas?

*walks into a 7/11 with an Internet Urinal*
Jackass: "FILL ER UP!"

Whoever made that should be dragged out in the street and shot, then urinated on out of spite.

[Bob The Mercenary]

That's what "brb" and "afk" are made for. You can't just disown them. Where will they go? Who will take them in? How do we know they will be taken care of? Think of the children!

That would be an experience, though. Taking a dump while fragging someone in CS. A whole new level of euphoria.

[Toastburner B]

Just think of the banter that will go on with people going to the bathroom as they play.

On second thought, don't. I did, and now I have a desire to go find something toxic to inhale in the hopes of killing the braincells that thought of that stuff.

[ChaosMage]

I think you guys are missing the joke. This is a jab at 1) The sedentary gaming lifestyle 2) The stereotypes (right or wrong) that ensue. This is a gag gift, and not something they expect people to use seriously.

[BlackMageGirl!]

I was about to say...I sincerely hope that no one uses it. And it if they do, well...their life is forfeit. =P

[C-dog]

This is hilarious.

I think this is a good thing. People who buy this for actual use will hole themselves up at their computers even more, safely away from the sane, general public. The fewer peeing-at-their-desk weirdos I have to see every day, the better.

[Arlia Janet]

Hey, WoW addict. Yes you. Do you like the smell of stagnant urine?

Are you the last one on your block to get a DBS infection or any other urinary tract carried disease?

Well you are in luck my friend because I have just the perfect product for you!

[Elmer J.]

Doesn't Bawls come in bottles, rather than cans?
It matters not.
I hope anyone who buys this for practical use rather than the gag realises that they're only delaying the inevitable.
They're still gonna have to empty the damned thing.
The means to living at your computer would be much more complicated.

And this isn't a new or altogether unpractical idea.
I used to have a friend with muscular dystrophy in a wheelchair.
I had to empty his piss-bottle once or twice.
This is just giving a bad name to people who are physically unable to get away from their chairs.

[Toastburner B]

There is the real possiblity that this is, in fact, a joke gift.

But, on the other hand, you have to remember that the fridge with a TV in it, car with a TV in the steering wheel, and the internet-ready toilet exist.

And suddenly...this seems painfully plausible.

[ChaosMage]

But, on the other hand, you have to remember that the fridge with a TV in it, car with a TV in the steering wheel, and the internet-ready toilet exist.
No. Tell me you're kidding. Please. For the love of god, tell me there is no internet-ready toilet. I hereby declare that my life no longer has meaning.

And, side note, an internet ready toilet makes this particular device unneeded. You could have the TV/Fridge right next to it, and you'd rarely have to get up for food too.

[Sithdarth]

Hell why bother with the middle man. Give me a catheter and plug me right into the plumbing system. That way not only do I not have to get up but I don't even have to think about it because any fluid automatically drains. (Trust me I had one and they're painfull as sin going in and coming out.) Who cares if I get a horrible infection; it's not like I'll be getting any use of that aside from waste disposal with the not leaving my desk and all.

Yeah, sunlight is your friend. You need it to produce certain vitamins. Exercise isn't bad for you either. Of course for the love of god stay clear of freestyle walking and urban jumping. Otherwise I'll have to hunt you down and beat you smart.

[Meister]

Well, if the third part of Tim Buckley's prophecy (http://www.ctrlaltdel-online.com/?t=archives&date=2005-02-21) ever comes true, please send someone over with a large mullet to crush my modem.

... did I write "mullet" up there?

Good, that's what I meant.

[Toastburner B]

No. Tell me you're kidding. Please. For the love of god, tell me there is no internet-ready toilet. I hereby declare that my life no longer has meaning.

And, side note, an internet ready toilet makes this particular device unneeded. You could have the TV/Fridge right next to it, and you'd rarely have to get up for food too.

Well...apparently it may or may not have existed. In theory, at least.

Microsoft kept changing their story. (http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2003/05/13/tech/main553567.shtml)

And, at either rate, it was a portable toilet, so you would still need the bladder thingy.

I don't know if the fact it was supposed to be a portable toilet made it better or worse.

On second thought, worse. Seriously, seriously, worse.

[G.I.R.]

An internet ready Port-O-Potty... eeeewwwww!

[MasterOfMagic]

I think this made my day. And for that, I must thank you. I don't want to meet the person who owns one though... the smell of urine would be permenantly grafted onto their body.


I think this is a good thing. People who buy this for actual use will hole themselves up at their computers even more, safely away from the sane, general public. The fewer peeing-at-their-desk weirdos I have to see every day, the better.
Amen. Amen.

[Carnivore]

Looking at the female adaptor, I can tell you, as somebody who has had a urine test before, that it will require some awkward manuevering to get that thing to work right. Plus, imagine the mess. Easier to walk the 10 feet to the bathroom.

[Krylo]

I'd just like to point out that this product has existed for years as a sporting urinal, for people who just can't stand the thought of leaving their fishing boat/hole/hunting stand/whatever else to take a leak. They also have toilet tops that fit on buckets for crapping in. We sell both where I work.

All Thinkgeek really did was look at these things, shake their head, and then say "Let's make fun of them, and gamers, and the stereotypes by tossing the word 'internet' on this."

The female adapter is usually sold seperately, however. And the ones we carry are red.

[Viktor Von Russia]

I'd just like to point out that this product has existed for years as a sporting urinal, for people who just can't stand the thought of leaving their fishing boat/hole/hunting stand/whatever else to take a leak.

And of course, there's also the device used in the Senate during filibusters so that the speaker can pee whilst rambling. If it's good enough for a U.S. senator, it must be good enough for computer addicted freaks.

[Kupo-chan]

http://www.thinkgeek.com/images/other/suyas-icon.gif

Oh god no....

EDIT: I'm really supprised no one commented about that...Well, anyway, that has to be the stupidest idea I have ever seen..

[G.I.R.]

/pizza is real. EQ2 has it up on their website.

EDIT
/pizza (http://everquest2.station.sony.com/pizza/)

[Sato]

What makes me disbelive this as a REAL product is the female adapter and the word usage, as well as the akward design of the contraption.

[DragonDaimyo]

Well, if the third part of Tim Buckley's prophecy (http://www.ctrlaltdel-online.com/?t=archives&date=2005-02-21) ever comes true, please send someone over with a large mullet to crush my modem.

Dang. I was gonna quote that comic, but Meister beat me to it.

I'm sure there are people out there who bought this and intend to use it as it is advertised. I have only one thing to say to them:

"WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING???!!!! GET UP AND GET SOME EXERCISE!! DON'T BE AN ALBINO GEEK!!!!"

[Krylo]

What makes me disbelive this as a REAL product is the female adapter and the word usage, as well as the akward design of the contraption.
No. Seriously. Go into a sporting goods store and you can find this thing in EXACTLY this design and the female adapter in the same shape.

[Pixie]

So, if the person would do this for their hobby, do you think they would not shower either?

... That's kind of gross.

But seriously, anyone who would use this on a regular basis, needs to get outside or at least stand up and take a shower. I know some hardcore gamers, but you can always take a break. Well, unless you're in a match, but in CS a match takes about 20 minutes- an hour, you can wait until the end of the match or else go before. I used to be in a clan, and we had practices. You just go BEFORE you have practice. It's not that hard, people. And in normal gaming/internet use, you always can get downtime.

[Death by Stabbing]

well at least BM has a peace offering to give WM
(I know I'm a sick bastard who's going to hell why not say it anyway?)
DBS

[Terex4]

No one has seen the corporate possiblilities. Do you know how much more can be done if your employees never have to take a bathroom break? Seriously, bathroom breaks can take up hours of otherwise productive time, and you just know the first business to buy these things and implement the new policy will be considered "dynamic" and "a business frontiersman".

When you think about it, a cubicle is about the size of a bathroom stall....

[Packman]

The first business to do this will be ridiculed as morons and probably take hefty fines and lawsuits in response which is well deserved.

I also find the idea VERY intriguing.

Morons! Honestly, we need to impliment a device which lets us control our computers with our mind. That way we dont halfta move our hands at all.

But then we also need to develope either robots or clones to serve us, so that all of the world can be gamers. Then first person shooters would be REAL and we would go stalking other armys soldiers over our computers. Finally we would goto into the enemys houses and frag the guy at the computer. Hopefully your good enough to get to them first.