Here's hoping you feel better, sweetie.

You are a cool dude. Your MGS name is inspiration of this. As to nice guy shenanigans, I'm in the same boat. I get shy and I start to turn to my vices. I drink, I smoke and I talk. I bet your vices are different, but don't turn to them. Don't turn to anything. You're acting on your virtues instead of your cynism. Act on both. Be a nice bad guy or an anti-hero.