Bob, you need to delete some space in your inbox so I can send you something.

The most important question any man will ask you in the year 2011 is this:
Do you want to star in my webcomic?
The answer is almost assuredly yes, particularly considering that you'd be a protagonist working alongside Nikose and Bobbey and I. Also, you'd be very short. And a mercenary.

Also: Is it wrong that I now really want to attend Connecticon just because I've heard Mookie is going to be there and I'd like to purchase an elementary school children's book about how to write fiction and give it to him?

Mr. Mercenary: If you happen to require any advice as to good bars to barhop around in the fifth circle of hell (a state otherwise known as Connecticut), let me know and I shall provide you all the information you'd ever need.

So, how exactly does Connecticon work? Do I have to pay a one-time fee to access Connecticon every day it's open, or can I pay just once if I only want to go one day?
...Also, what bars are you and the gang going to hit up after?
...Finally, on a scale from one to ten, how ridiculous will you look in your cosplay outfit? If I decide not to cosplay (because I am in fact sane) will I stick out like a sore thumb?

That period of time was supposed to have been lost forever.

That said I can't wait to read the next chapter of NPF's history, and hate myself anew.

Oh man.
The 2004 version of Bob the Mercenary is definitely going to be making several appearances in my history.
It will be amazing.
And by "amazing" I mean "amazingly awkward for you."
Your only hope to prevent this disaster is to offer to introduce me to hordes of beautiful women at Connecticon.

It was a squirt gun.

<3?

I "forced you to vote at gunpoint?"
Oh, Bob. Your harsh words. They wound me. =(

Awesome.
P.S. Have you voted yet? If not I will be the lamest person you have ever known on NPF by asking you on your public message board to vote, as I have little to no shame.