Quote:
Originally Posted by Lord Setheris
Team Sex Pun: GO!
Only you have to power to stop Kefka now!
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You missed the part where we're still doing Dragon's Den.
Sorry it's late, but after doing that fucking dungeon I am bereft of any compassion or empathy.
Dragon's Den (as I have just discovered) is stupidly long, filled with random encounters that make previous bosses seem like nothing, filled with bosses that put the final boss to shame, and filled with stupid, STUPID fetch-subquests that require you to send one team to one end of the dungeon, send the other team through a maze at the other end to step on a pressure plate, let the other team go through to step on a DIFFERENT pressure plate, send the third team in through ANOTHER door to find that you can't fucking get through because you haven't beaten the RIGHT GODDAMN BOSS YET...
What comes next was the fruit of two hours of labour. After I beat Kefka I'm never playing this godforsaken game ever again.
That's right. A single optional dungeon has ruined an entire game for me. That's how fucking bad this was.
Dragon's Den! We're all montage'd up and ready to go! We know every spell we can learn at this point, have max HP on everyone, have all these crazy endgame items, and feel pretty damn unstoppable! I'm sure NOTHING CAN RUIN THIS FUCKING NATURAL HIGH I FEEL RIGHT NOW. NOTHING AT FUCKING ALL.
Yeah! Confidence.
Seal of ice, prepare to meet your maker!
Ice Dragons, prepare for a similar fate!
The trick to beating these guys is using multi-target spells.
Yes, it looks weird to see all those damage texts stacked, but it just means that we hit all the Ice Dragons for massive damage.
Single-target abilities are still useable but it will only hit one dragon, and when they start dying, the remaining ones get stronger abilities.
Ultima is your friend.
Sweet, the thingies are gone!
Behind the dragon is a path to a lava cave, as well as...
Another dragon.
Also, pressure plates. FUCK.
Other unsealed passage...
...has ANOTHER pressure plate.
I'm sensing a pattern. I WONDER IF THIS WILL CONTINUE AD NAUSEUM THROUGHOUT THE LEVEL.
Trying door number one...
A different seal.
And a dead end.
Door number two...
More pressure plates.
The pressure plates let the other team go through the dead end to step on another pressure plate.
Hop across to profit!
Storm Dragon is annoying because it blocks all attacks and magic that don't auto-hit. Luckily, Ultima auto-hits.
Once you rough it up a bit, it "cloaks itself in wind," which is supposed to increase evasion (doesn't because it already auto-evades) and speed (doesn't because it's immune to time effects).
It died soon after.
Okay, I'll be honest, I have a ton more pictures of the dungeon itself, but the thing is, the design is so go-here-come-back that I could probably recreate the entire level through the few background shots I have. As a rule, I don't usually show the dungeon path, and I think I said I'd make an exception this time.
I'm excepting the exception because the dungeon took me 2 hours to do with 5x speed. Bosses only. The rest is bad memories.
Earth Dragon!
Looks like a dinosaur.
This is what the battle looked like.
I killed him too fast to see what he actually does.
Ah, so he's doing our job for us?
Except that no, he isn't, because he's immune to all damage.
Even Ultima.
So now we play the waiting game.
We win.
Water dragon!
Dunno what he does either.
Skull dragon is a MOTHERFUCKER.
Oh, look, I killed him. That was easy.
OH SHIT HE'S ACTUALLY A ZOMBIE.
....sigh....
So I have to drain his magic points.
For reference, he has something like 22000 MP.
HALF AN HOUR LATER ON 5x SPEED.
Fucking finally.
Holy dragon!
He cures himself when attacked.
This does nothing but delay the inevitable.
Gold Dragon! Ultima will not work on him.
Ultima WEAPON will.
No more stupid colour dragons.
MUCH, MUCH LATER.
Hey, look, it's a boss.
They made me come here. Trust me, I TOTALLY wouldn't have if it weren't for them.
I'll show you some fucking profanity you cuntsucking piece of shit.
I know. Shut up.
He can read my mind, too. I want to die after that dungeon.
Betcha it isn't.
Kaiser likes to use Barrier Change, which makes him weak against one element and absorb/nullify all others. Luckily, Ultima is non-elemental, so you can cast it as much as you want. Hurray.
*poof*
This had better be worth it!
Oh man, maybe they actually put something WORTH those two hours at the end of the level!
Magicite? Okay, what else?
Nothing.
Nothing at all.
Can anybody give me the last 2 hours of my life back please?