"Fix" the Game

[Mirai Gen]

If they really want to do Sonic the Hedgehog right, it needs to be about Sonic doing what Sonic does best - going fast and trying to hit Dr. Robotnik's (NOT Dr Goddamn Eggman) boss-battle contraption. Nothing more. Nothing less. Fingers crossed that the new Sonic game will do exactly that.

If you absolutely insist upon using the other characters, then fine. But don't make up new ones. Sonic, Knuckles, Tails, and (Sigh) I suppose Shadow too. If you must. Sonic has a cool world (Anthropomorphic animals with completely awesome unrelated powers? Fuck yes!) but Sega you have shown yourself to be incapable of handling the material correctly. Cream? Amy? Come on. I'm taking away your privileges.

But god, Sonic is about going fast. Give him a crapload of super-linear levels filled with going fast and jumping at the appropriate time. When Knuckles shows up, use that strength he's supposed to have! Tails can fly and he's got a plane - use that! Make it so each character actually does something other than What Sonic Does But Differently.

Whatever happened to multi-tiered levels? What happened to Sonic 3's shield-powers and the ability to use them with Sonic alone? What happened to the trade-off of using Sonic Knuckles or Tails in Sonic 3 and Knuckles? Those were good ideas!

In this thread we 'fix' games that suck. Go.

[Nikose Tyris]

Dr. Robotnik was only ever his 'english' name. His name IS Dr. Eggman in the japanese for as far back as I understand. His grandfather's name was Dr. Kintobor Ovi or something like that...

You know what, that's just this giant can of rotten eggs that I'll wait for Regulus Tera to come in and drop the landmine on because god knows He/She/IT has the entire fuggin' history of Sonic committed to memory including every storyline twist, fucked up plot and brickbat turned.

Hey a great game they could totally roll with fixing?

GORRAM MARIO.

They KNOW the correct formulae, they've USED IT on repeated FUGGIN' OCCASIONS, even with Mario Galaxy! The only fuckup they did with Galaxy was making it TOO LONG and having to play the EXACT same game TWICE. If they'd given the Second 'Half" it's own unique story instead of just copying the entire Mario storyline then yes that would have been bloody amazing but as it stands it was like they artificially extended the game and only changed 2 bloody scripts for the entire thing.

[bananarama]

Originally Posted by Mirai Gen

If they really want to do Sonic the Hedgehog right, it needs to be about Sonic doing what Sonic does best - going fast and trying to hit Dr. Robotnik's (NOT Dr Goddamn Eggman) boss-battle contraption. Nothing more. Nothing less. Fingers crossed that the new Sonic game will do exactly that.

If you absolutely insist upon using the other characters, then fine. But don't make up new ones. Sonic, Knuckles, Tails, and (Sigh) I suppose Shadow too. If you must. Sonic has a cool world (Anthropomorphic animals with completely awesome unrelated powers? Fuck yes!) but Sega you have shown yourself to be incapable of handling the material correctly. Cream? Amy? Come on. I'm taking away your privileges.

But god, Sonic is about going fast. Give him a crapload of super-linear levels filled with going fast and jumping at the appropriate time. When Knuckles shows up, use that strength he's supposed to have! Tails can fly and he's got a plane - use that! Make it so each character actually does something other than What Sonic Does But Differently.

Whatever happened to multi-tiered levels? What happened to Sonic 3's shield-powers and the ability to use them with Sonic alone? What happened to the trade-off of using Sonic Knuckles or Tails in Sonic 3 and Knuckles? Those were good ideas!

In this thread we 'fix' games that suck. Go.

*sniffle* So true...

Also, Star Fox:

All right you motherfuckers (Read: Nintendo). You fucked up majorly 3 times now. Adventures was retarded on-foot collectathon shit with Barney and company. Assault was a sorta step in the right direction since you toned down on the on foot shit (but didn't get rid of it!) in favor of some awesome on-rail flying action except that it was a fucking linear 10 mission game WITH NOTHING ELSE... but that was done by Namco so I'll let it sorta slide since it technically wasn't your fault. Then there was Command.... the fucking ultimate-ball breaker for Star Fox fans everywhere. All flying missions with no rails? Fuck yes! Done with a startegy flavor? Nice. Multiple endings with many branching paths that makes for a whole shitload of replayability? Sign me up. But... DID YOU FUCKING HAVE TO MAKE EVERY FUCKING SINGLE MISSION KILL X GENERIC SOMETHINGS, FLY THROUGH SOME RED RECTANGLAR SHIT TO DESTROY A MISSLE/MOTHERSHIP, OR BOSS BATTLES YOU STUPID MOTHERFUCKERS??!!?1?! HEY HOW ABOUT SOME VARIATION Y'KNOW LIKE SOME FUCKING INGENUITY BEYOND THREE FUCKING MISSION TYPES, HUH?!?!?!1

In short, every Star Fox game from now (if there will be any...) should be basically Star Fox 64 2, 3, 4, etc. That would be a good idea. More on-rail missions. Some all-range mode missions to shake things up here and there. More planets with variations to keep them from becoming Generic Planet #1, Generic Planet #2, etc. More memorable one-liners. More Falco. More Peppy. More Star Wolf. More Andross.... But less Slippy... fuck that guy...

[Mirai Gen]

Dr. Robotnik was his English name so goddamn it when we're talking about the game in English his name is Dr. Robotnik. When we start talking in Japanese then okay, sure, it's Dr. EGGUMANU.

I'll wait for Regulus Tera to come in and drop the landmine on because god knows He/She/IT has the entire fuggin' history of Sonic committed to memory including every storyline twist, fucked up plot and brickbat turned.

Seriously?

Wow I need to hit him up on MSN now so I can make fun of him.

EDIT: Adding to above, seriously, the whole "Multiple-planet Route Selection" thing was awesome. Bring that back with more boss battles and less "Anything But The Arwing" missions.

[bananarama]

Originally Posted by Mirai Gen

EDIT: Adding to above, seriously, the whole "Multiple-planet Route Selection" thing was awesome. Bring that back with more boss battles and less "Anything But The Arwing" missions.

Hey you have to admit that the Submarine was fucking badass! I could do with more of that...

[Regulus Tera]

Originally Posted by Mirai Gen

If they really want to do Sonic the Hedgehog right, it needs to be about Sonic doing what Sonic does best - going fast and trying to hit Dr. Robotnik's (NOT Dr Goddamn Eggman) boss-battle contraption. Nothing more. Nothing less. Fingers crossed that the new Sonic game will do exactly that...

But god, Sonic is about going fast. Give him a crapload of super-linear levels filled with going fast and jumping at the appropriate time. When Knuckles shows up, use that strength he's supposed to have! Tails can fly and he's got a plane - use that! Make it so each character actually does something other than What Sonic Does But Differently.

Sonic was never about only going fast. It was about going fast and platforming into levels with multiple paths. Finding new routes was the reason Sonic the Hedgehog had so much replayability.

Originally Posted by Mirai Gen

Whatever happened to multi-tiered levels?

Exactly.

You should play Sonic Rush and Sonic Rush Adventure. They are awesome. The developer of those, Dimps, is also working on the Wii and PS2 version of Sonic Unleashed. Needless to say, I'm more hopeful for those versions of the game than the ones for the next-gen consoles, which are being handled by Sonic Team.

Originally Posted by Mirai Gen

In this thread we 'fix' games that suck. Go.

The Legend of Zelda ~ Not really fixing, as the formula is fun at all, but we've been playing with it for a decade already. It's time to create a revolution the size of Ocarina of Time in the series, and by that I don't mean remaking Ocarina of Time. I want Aonuma to think outside the box. Stop this crap about killing the boss with the item you found in that exact same dungeon. What about only using your sword to kill him, without any use of any other items? If you create a whole variety of movesets for Link that would be feasible.

Another thing I really want to see in Zelda: an open world à la Shadow of the Colossus. Maybe not as desolate, but vaster and livelier than what we got right now would be awesome.

And stop this shit with making Ganondorf the last boss. If you are not going to give him The Wind Waker levels of characterisation then don't include him in the game. Twilight Princess just crapped on his character horribly.


Final Fantasy ~ Square: Final Fantasy XII was a breath of fresh air. It reminded me why I loved the series -you never know what to expect from it. But vomiting fifty games a year with the brand dilutes the expectations horribly. Just stop.

There's no need for the Compilation of Final Fantasy VII if only one of the bajillion games you're releasing for it are going to be any good. Make Crystal Chronicles its own series so that there's a bit more creative freedom in it. And, most importantly, stop with the belts and the zippers. The design was fine when you were the first ones using it, but now that the market is saturated with so much clones you should try to differentiate yourselves again.


Metroid Prime 3: Corruption ~ This was a fun game, but it wasn't Metroid. As much as I love the controls you transformed the title into an FPS wannabe. The level design was part of what made the series great, but you made the one in this game so shallow it just doesn't compare.


Kid Icarus Wii (which by this point is all but confirmed) ~ Factor Five: We've had a great time together. I loved the Rogue Squadron games. I'm sure if you handled Star Fox that would revive the saga. But, seriously, how did you fuck up Lair? Please, Factor Five, don't mess this one up. Don't try to make it dark and gritty, as the "leaked" concept art suggests. Just make it about Pit flying and shit. Make it a mix of Metroid, Zelda, and Mario, as the original one was.

Just... just don't fuck it up.


Star Fox ~ Stop with the "profound" space opera. On foot missions are fine as long as they don't comprise 80% percent of the game. Make the focus the Arwing stuff, with some all-range battles available only in very important events. And please, for the love of Gunpei Yokoi, GET RID OF KRYSTAL.

Originally Posted by Nikose

You know what, that's just this giant can of rotten eggs that I'll wait for Regulus Tera to come in and drop the landmine on because god knows He/She/IT has the entire fuggin' history of Sonic committed to memory including every storyline twist, fucked up plot and brickbat turned.

...What the fuck is wrong with you? The only games I've played are Sonic 1, Sonic Adventure 2: Battle, the shitty 360/PS3 game and the DS ones. That's hardly being a fan.

See Mirai? This is why I didn't want to cross paths with Niko again. : (

[OctoberRaven]

RPGs in general: If you're going to have scenes with voice acting and dialoge where characters refer to each other by name with said voice acting, give the main a fucking name, so people don't have to refer to him as 'him' or 'that guy'. Makes it seem like they never even bother to learn his name.

Games tied-in with superhero movies: Stop making these. Or if you absolutely MUST make them, dont make them just an interactive remake of the movie with new stuff added in. The Punisher game is a good example of this. Okay, so there's a few characters from the movie that are in the game. That's fine because it still tells an entirely different story. Not to mention it was a good game by itself (suprising for THQ).

[Truce]

Continuing from OctoberRaven's post...

Give the main character a voice! There's nothing that pisses me off more than a silent protagonist.

The least you could do is have him speak the choices you make! Rather than just having it zoom in on his face, have his mouth move, and yet make no sound at all.

...I'm looking at you, Suikoden IV.

[01d55]

Originally Posted by Regulus Tera

The only games I've played are Sonic 1, Sonic Adventure 2: Battle, the shitty 360/PS3 game and the DS ones. That's hardly being a fan.

Really? Get ahold of Sonic 2, Sonic 3, and Sonic and Knuckles. They are awesome.

I need to get the gameboy Sonics, they are oldschool style the way I like 'em.

[Kerensky287]

I think that a big issue with many VG villains is that nobody takes them seriously anymore. Robotnik is a big one, though I hear Bioware's fixing that in Dark Brotherhood.

Another villain that they SERIOUSLY need to villainize is Starwolf. In SF64 he was a badass opposite to Starfox, and he had an eyepatch, which rocked. In Assault he became your stereotypical bad-guy-turned-antihero. In Command he didn't do ANYTHING bad, except (arguably bad, and only sometimes) steal Krystal away from the Starfox team.

Also give Leon Powalski his GODDAMNED VOICE BACK.