Confess your sins: Horrible things you wrote/drew when you didn't know better

BitVyper · 09-24-2008, 03:16 PM

So I see a lot of aspiring authors and artists on this site, but the thing is; you don't get good without being really terrible first. And if you haven't noticed that yet, you're probably still there.

So be free of your shame! Tell us about the things you wrote or drew that come into your mind and taunt you every so often.

I was a character thief. My feats include stealing the entire cast of Lodoss War, a few characters from Fire Emblem, Kenshin, and of course, Drizzt Do'Urden (has anyone *not* stolen him?). I also made a lot of plots that made absolutely no sense because I was obsessed with some cool thing I had just seen in a video game (usually a sword), and I wanted to hurry up and get to it.

I recall one thing I wrote for a language arts class that involved a Parn ripoff fighting monsters, getting knocked out, and waking up fully armed in an empty cave for no explained reason. There was also a magic sword and a ghost in the cave. My teacher liked it and made me write a sequel later in the year. At that time, I had gotten into killing off characters, so the whole thing ended with "Parn" getting murdered by an assassin *ahem* "loosely based on" that cool crimson sword guy from Fire Emblem.

Unfortunately, I was not blessed with a teacher who liked fantasy again. Later language arts classes generally specified writing about boring things ("write a story about a family trip to the beach"). The resulted in the development of what I like to call "OH SHIT NINJAS!" moments. Unfortunately, my skills at the time made this more awkward than funny.

So that's a few from me. Share some of your own, or this post is just gonna look weird.

Mirai Gen · 09-24-2008, 03:34 PM

Let's see here...

My entire Fanfiction.net archive, which I have only kept up to laugh at my 16 year old self.

My first 'book' was basically stolen material from everything, among them a DND campaign offered for free online, Sophitia from Soul Calibur, Aeris from Final Fantasy 7, Edwin from Baldur's Gate, and the kung-fu guy I can't remember his name of from Xenogears. Naturally of course the names were changed so it was 'mine'.

Wrote some Devil May Cry fanfiction, that was pretty hideous.

Stole Dragon Ball Z-type character, threw him into a midevil world, and then dropped him into a time-portal to send him into the present time. I don't know what I was trying to do either.

BitVyper · 09-24-2008, 03:38 PM

Quote:

I don't know what I was trying to do either.

The ones that even the original author can't make sense of are always the best ones.

Mirai Gen · 09-24-2008, 03:42 PM

I'm reminded of one of the comics in Penny Arcade's first year. For Attack of the Bacon Robots, Tycho had a comic that ended with, "It's a Planet thing, man, you wouldn't understand." And he said, quote, "Uh, I don't understand it either, and I wrote you, comic."

TLDR: Oh god yes they are.

Nique · 09-24-2008, 04:48 PM

Haha. I lifted every Power-Ranger's cliche and created 'The Lightning Bros'. It was this huge mash-up of Super Mario, Bill & Ted, & Power Rangers with just a dash of Thor & Spiderman thrown in. I think we had some Max Headroom and a little 'Saved by the Bell' in there too.

TDK · 09-24-2008, 06:02 PM

Once again...I wrote an 80 page Underworld fanfiction.

PCD · 09-24-2008, 06:08 PM

It was in third grade, so I deem it fairly forgivable, but it was a terrible sin nonetheless. I wrote a story using the characters from Animorphs, with a plot stolen from an episode of Scooby-Doo. Even then, I felt bad that my teacher thought it was so good.

I don't think I made a single original character until seventh grade. It was all cheaply made fancharacters in cheap, pointless plots that Mary-Sued the hell out of them. I feel awful, looking back and realizing I had more than one characters based on myself who were extremely pretty and unique and good at everything.

RickZarber · 09-24-2008, 06:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PCD

I don't think I made a single original character until seventh grade. It was all cheaply made fancharacters in cheap, pointless plots that Mary-Sued the hell out of them. I feel awful, looking back and realizing I had more than one characters based on myself who were extremely pretty and unique and good at everything.

I'm pretty sure most kids do this, though. They build on what they already know, and it's not until they're older that they really start to be creative.

I only wrote the first few chapters of a Star Wars story when I was in elementary school, plus I drew an at least hundred-page-long SW comic book starring my own alien character (full page illustrations). Both were really horrible, but the comic book was still kinda cool for someone so young.

More than that, I made movies. Our very first movie in 1992 was a Ghostbusters movie (I played Egon). Other franchises we ripped off or tried to adapt over the next decade: The Hobbit, Mario Bros, Power Rangers, The Time Machine, Star Wars, Star Trek, Goosebumps, Toy Story, Animaniacs, James Bond, Highlander, Indiana Jones, etc. Later on we turned to "parodies" of everything from Batman to Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs. Our list of crimes is long.

EDIT: Picture proof!

The funniest thing about this screencap to me now is that the image is perfectly framed.

Kaneda · 09-24-2008, 06:53 PM

I tried an Earthbound fanfiction when I was in like, 6th grade. It was a horrible abomination.

And I seriously did a fucking Cowboy Bebop/Lord of the Rings crossover fancomic that same year.

Bob The Mercenary · 09-24-2008, 06:59 PM

In fourth grade for an ongoing Language Arts project I wrote a "trilogy" of short stories called Henry and the Witch with a very very dumb plot and characters named after me and my friends. I think I still have a copy of it somewhere. I would paste it here were it not so horrendous.

09-24-2008, 03:16 PM	#1
BitVyper History's Strongest Dilettante Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Arcadia Posts: 6,662	Confess your sins: Horrible things you wrote/drew when you didn't know better So I see a lot of aspiring authors and artists on this site, but the thing is; you don't get good without being really terrible first. And if you haven't noticed that yet, you're probably still there. So be free of your shame! Tell us about the things you wrote or drew that come into your mind and taunt you every so often. I was a character thief. My feats include stealing the entire cast of Lodoss War, a few characters from Fire Emblem, Kenshin, and of course, Drizzt Do'Urden (has anyone not stolen him?). I also made a lot of plots that made absolutely no sense because I was obsessed with some cool thing I had just seen in a video game (usually a sword), and I wanted to hurry up and get to it. I recall one thing I wrote for a language arts class that involved a Parn ripoff fighting monsters, getting knocked out, and waking up fully armed in an empty cave for no explained reason. There was also a magic sword and a ghost in the cave. My teacher liked it and made me write a sequel later in the year. At that time, I had gotten into killing off characters, so the whole thing ended with "Parn" getting murdered by an assassin ahem "loosely based on" that cool crimson sword guy from Fire Emblem. Unfortunately, I was not blessed with a teacher who liked fantasy again. Later language arts classes generally specified writing about boring things ("write a story about a family trip to the beach"). The resulted in the development of what I like to call "OH SHIT NINJAS!" moments. Unfortunately, my skills at the time made this more awkward than funny. So that's a few from me. Share some of your own, or this post is just gonna look weird. __________________ "There are worlds out there where the sky is burning, and the sea is asleep, and the rivers dream. People made of smoke and cities made of song. Somewhere there's danger, somewhere there's injustice, somewhere else the tea's getting cold. Come on, Ace; we've got work to do!" Awesome art be here.

09-24-2008, 03:34 PM	#2
Mirai Gen We are Geth. Join Date: Nov 2003 Posts: 14,032	Let's see here... My entire Fanfiction.net archive, which I have only kept up to laugh at my 16 year old self. My first 'book' was basically stolen material from everything, among them a DND campaign offered for free online, Sophitia from Soul Calibur, Aeris from Final Fantasy 7, Edwin from Baldur's Gate, and the kung-fu guy I can't remember his name of from Xenogears. Naturally of course the names were changed so it was 'mine'. Wrote some Devil May Cry fanfiction, that was pretty hideous. Stole Dragon Ball Z-type character, threw him into a midevil world, and then dropped him into a time-portal to send him into the present time. I don't know what I was trying to do either. __________________

09-24-2008, 03:42 PM	#4
Mirai Gen We are Geth. Join Date: Nov 2003 Posts: 14,032	I'm reminded of one of the comics in Penny Arcade's first year. For Attack of the Bacon Robots, Tycho had a comic that ended with, "It's a Planet thing, man, you wouldn't understand." And he said, quote, "Uh, I don't understand it either, and I wrote you, comic." TLDR: Oh god yes they are. __________________

09-24-2008, 06:59 PM	#10
Bob The Mercenary Bob Dole Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Bob Dole Posts: 5,606	In fourth grade for an ongoing Language Arts project I wrote a "trilogy" of short stories called Henry and the Witch with a very very dumb plot and characters named after me and my friends. I think I still have a copy of it somewhere. I would paste it here were it not so horrendous. __________________ Bob Dole

09-24-2008, 06:02 PM	#6
TDK Sent to the cornfield Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Reality Posts: 2,914	Once again...I wrote an 80 page Underworld fanfiction.

09-24-2008, 06:53 PM	#9
Kaneda Pitch black and covered in soot. Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Bennington, Vermont Posts: 729	I tried an Earthbound fanfiction when I was in like, 6th grade. It was a horrible abomination. And I seriously did a fucking Cowboy Bebop/Lord of the Rings crossover fancomic that same year.