D&D Shenanigans

[TDK]

So Joe's original shop has just collapsed into a hole in the ground. All the honey and gold is gone. I at first suspected those godforsaken gnomes, but the tunnel is just slightly too big.

Dwarves.

I come out the other end of the tunnel after being hassled a bit by Chyme and find a dwarf camp. I wait an hour or so until sundown for them to all pass out, then I tie all the tent flaps closed and fill each tent with bees one at a time until everything inside is dead. I leave one dwarf alive to interrogate. Practically buzzing with rage, Joe asks the dwarf why. After a bit of prodding, it seems one dwarf escaped my slaughter at the giant bee hive. He went back to a nearby dwarf colony and they, lacking the military force to even attempt to take back the bee hive, went after me instead, as I'd obviously become quite the reknowned figure in the honey world.

With their love of mead, the dwarves were of course quite familiar with the honey trade. So they came after me. Destroyed my shop.

This didn't end well for them. I questioned the dwarf as to the location of the dwarf hive (Joe has a tendency to refer to large groups of any creature as a hives), but he wasn't talking, so I murdered him with bees.

So now I have to hunt down a dwarf colony, because apparently my DM wants me to commit genocide through bees. Shouldn't be too difficult to find.

There will be BLOOD.


My DM questioned my murder of the dwarves in relation to my alignment (Chaotic Neutral). I replied with, as appropriate, something regarding bees.

"Well, bees are nice. Pretty. Buzz. Make honey. Just like Joe. But if you disturb their hive, you're going to get stung to death.

...Just like Joe."

While Joe has integrated quite a bit into common society, he still retains a moderately bee-like morality in regards to stinging people to death. Sometimes its necessary for the good of the hive or to protect the honey or what have you.

He doesn't have a ton of moral compulsions against killing to protect his hive home, or for what he believes is right, but he is unlike most adventurers in that murder isn't always his first choice. Its only when he or something he believes in (the giant bee hive, for instance) is attacked that he goes into slaughter-people-with-bees mode.

He is also a bit short tempered, but I like to think he has control over that as appropriate in most situations.

Also, I found a very interesting class (inspiration for this character) on dndwiki, which is normally an awful site, but there's a few gems in the mounds of overpowered shit. This class, in particular, the Lurker in the Swarm, was only slightly overpowered and silly. So I fixed it and detracted some of the silly. You can see it here: http://sansrandom.com/blog/main/2010...the-swarm.html

There's also a link to the original class there.

At the DM's approval, I'm taking levels in it. I can do so next level. >:3

[TitoTheHappy]

Back when my group was playing 3.5 we were exploring some underground ruins and we got in an encounter with a group of beasts (its been about 3 years so I can't remember which exactly they were) and we happened to be adjacent to a incredibly large hole, long story short the fight was going very poorly for my party and the monk decided to grapple with one of the creatures and then dragged it and himself off the edge of the cliff.

Somehow he was able to break the grapple, brace himself against the sides of the pit, stop his fall and climb back up. By the time he made it to the top the tides of the battle had changed yet he decided he was invincible and decided to attempt this again.

This time he was unable to break the grapple in time. KA-Splat. Our DM was kind enough to allow us to climb down and find enough of his body to resurrect.

[tacticslion]

I find this one of the most humorous things in this thread:

Originally Posted by google adds

* Bee Removal - Florida Honey Bees, Yellowjackets, Hornets Entomologists on staff 800-343-5317
AllFloridaBeeRemoval.com
* Bee Exterminator Fast, Safe, Effective serving the local area since 1994
ultimatepest.com
* Live Bee Removal Florida Cheaper, humane, save the bees! Central Florida Ph 352 617 3673
www.ecobeeremoval.

Joe now has three new enemies, and they've advertised themselves to him!

Originally Posted by TDK

This class, in particular, the Lurker in the Swarm, was only slightly overpowered and silly. So I fixed it and detracted some of the silly. You can see it here: http://sansrandom.com/blog/main/2010...the-swarm.html

There's also a link to the original class there.

At the DM's approval, I'm taking levels in it. I can do so next level. >:3

As far as the class goes, I like it! It's a neat, well-developed concept, and it fits character theme excellently.

Two thoughts on balance, however (which you might want to consider either for your campaign, or, if not, for general consumption). First, as written, neither Healing Honey nor Royal Jelly abilities have a limit, or commensurate cost - at all. It's basically getting free healing potions and restoration potions, at will (granted only one each per hour, but still). While it's admittedly a stupid cost, you might want to make either a bit more 'expensive'* (some ideas include an extra-cheap potion, as in a 75% discount on normal potion creation costs; putting a maximum of 1/week per 2 class levels plus 1/week per highest single relevant ability modifier, such as Constitution - probably the best bet for you -, Wisdom, or Charisma; requiring a craft (honey) check to pay for it - this could be used in conjunction with the extra-cheap potion ability above -; or even something as simple as "using up" <insert given summon ability here> for a day), simply to prevent unmanageable money-growth that can come from that stuff. Second, the original class required one spell to gain access to that you do not. Replacing it with another spell or class ability (such as animal companion <giant bee>, or similar) might help balance the ease of getting into the class.

Or perhaps you and the GM like the mad-cap pace, which is cool too!

On that note, however...

Originally Posted by TDK

My stats were STR 9, DEX 9, CON 14, INT 8, WIS 10, CHA 10

How do you cast druid spells other than orisons? Warlocks don't require a high ability score to use their stuff, but druids do (spells, anyway).

One other thing, if you'd like, I had some ideas on how you could become even more bee-like or take steps toward truly being a god of bees: here's several!From the book "Complete Adventurer": the prestige classes "Animal Lord" (adapted so it's now the "Bee Lord"), and "Beast Master" (it gives you extra animal companions! giant bees ahoy!). From the book "Underdark": the prestige class Vermin Keeper (renamed to Bee Keeper, allows you to use your Wildshape from your druid to turn into a Giant Bee or a swarm, and summon more swarms and giant bees). From the book "Epic Level Handbook": the epic spell "Gathering of Maggots" (found under the monster entry "Worm who Walks") could be altered to become a "Gathering of the Hive Mind" and Joe could literally become a hive mind/swarm (a "Swarm who Walks" or something - and he flies, due to his template interacting with his class). Even if you're not interested in becoming a literal swarm with no physical features, you could still use the ELH to learn about, possibly summon and control a) a Devastation Bee [a variant of the Devastation Vermin], b) a Ruin Swarm [you want this], and c) a Vermiurge [effectively a demigod of vermin/swarms - drain his power dry, baby, or make him your own!]. Anyhoo, there's some ideas if you want them. Feel free to completely ignore them if you don't. If you need details, I could PM them at you, should you like.

Originally Posted by Nikose Tyris

Tricked the enemy into hating themselves.

This is a perfectly valid tactic which I wholeheartedly support.

Originally Posted by Nikose Tyris

We have an army of dogs and dog-likes.

I love your game.

Originally Posted by Nikose Tyris

This fight is beginning to get interesting.

Yes!

[Freefall]

The most memorable DnD moment I had was when I played Molly a half-doppelgänger assassin/mage. The party we played where called the ace hearts.

The the team was made of a Half-orc paladin with a sunblade and identity crisis, an Amazon(warrior/priest)/mage with fashion problems(warpaint don't go well with pointy hat and robe). And of course our ranger, with a +2/+4 magical, sentient, indestructible magebane longsword, who could talk(and scream)cast light, strength, and were afraid of the dark(us and it being in a country ruled by mages, it haven't seen much use), and me. The party had a pair of Gauntlets of ogre power str 18/00 that Molly where using in this fight.

So what happened was this:
Our party was travelling was home to the capital after a job of evils butt well kicked, when it had gotten dark, and we were planning on making camp we got ambushed by a Gargan priest(Evil evil) and 10 skeleton warriors(just to avoid confusion, this is ADnD, and skeleton warriors are tough). Still no sweat, this is a pretty hardcore team, and usually, we could haste all and keep the caster locked down with MM, especially priests.
Except first round goes something like this, Amazon casts haste, Rangerbob charges skeletons, along with palle, and I try for MM but rolls very poorly on ini. The priest however rolls good and Gates a Pit fiend buddy his to join the fun.
round 2 goes to the lines of Amazon charging pitboy(remember this is ADnD and devils are pushovers, more or less) me and Rangerbob charges the skeletons, Viggo missing in spite of getting +4, and palle duking it out with evil prist.
round 3-4 is to the lines of Amazon wasting a wall of force forgetting pit fiends can teleport at will, me dealing very little damage on very many attacks with my daggers, and Rangerbob missing a lot and spraining his foot, and Palle doing what he does best.
The next 2-3 rounds it goes Really bad, I drop my dagger a few times, on some 1's, but Rangerbob manages to drop his sword twice, hit me, and in an unprecedented case of bad luck, throws his sword away, of the road, over a cliff and down the dark mountain, the sword screaming all the way. at this point everyone has taken heavy damage, and is chugging PoEH.

We win narrowly some rounds later thanks to our Palle, who finishes of the priest, and the pit fiend not wanting to taste sunblade poofs away.

Our DM told us that he did not intend the encounter to be that hard, and have to this day always calculated with the Ranger Factor.

Of course there where also that time this team pissed of that red dragon with the lame wing, because we freed/stole his involuntary girlfriend/Maid/thief/gold-digger(actually my character was nearly raped by pretending to be her), and gave him dating advice. The battle abruptly ended when a wishing ring was used to dispel his fly and apparently also his bag of holding with his hoard in. it's incredible how reluctant a dragon can be to roast you when it has to burn it's hoard to slags as well.

P.S. The thief and the dragon later married and became PCs

[tacticslion]

That reminds me of this one time in a game I was playing in which several of the players who really had trouble staying on track for the game. One - against my advice - challenged a pretty important recurring NPC to a duel for some forgotten reason.

They were relatively evenly matched in terms of level, skill, and stats, so they rolled initiative. They both rolled 1's. The PC had a higher modifier by 1 point (higher DEX by 1 point), so he goes first. He rolls a on his attack. The NPC decides to attack as well, and rolls a 1. The entire table stared at both dice clearly showing 1's. In morbid curiosity, the combatants continued to fight one another, generally doing more damage to themselves and their equipment than to each other. It wasn't all ones or anything, but it was really rather spectacularly bad. Several critical fails later, and many rolls of 5 and under, they were just attempting things for the sheer improbability that this one would fail so badly too. Eventually, they started using magic items and spell scrolls at one another, to take advantage of their mutual low rolls. Of course, they immediately began to roll well, negating most of the damage from the magical effects. Before they both killed themselves and used up all their magic, they called it quits, and the GM was able to turn this into a story point (with a temporary NPC) in a quest to rid the characters of a curse levied against them by a powerful mage - who, it turned out was only trying to save their lives, and thus prevent a catastrophe he'd foreseen that would be caused by their deaths, etc. and thus we got back on the main story. Spooked the players into behaving, and the game went swimmingly from then on.

[TDK]

Originally Posted by tacticslion

On that note, however...
How do you cast druid spells other than orisons? Warlocks don't require a high ability score to use their stuff, but druids do (spells, anyway).

I couldn't, at first. I have since raised my wis to 11 so now I can cast first level ones. I also got my hands on a periapt of wisdom so I can cast level three spells next level.

Those classes you recommended should prove interesting. :3

[tacticslion]

Originally Posted by TDK

I couldn't, at first. I have since raised my wis to 11 so now I can cast first level ones. I also got my hands on a periapt of wisdom so I can cast level three spells next level.

Ah, cool.

Originally Posted by TDK

Those classes you recommended should prove interesting. :3

I'm a helper!

NEW POST!

So, my ubermench Lawful Good Kalashtar mage just effectively gave the bird* to a chaotic evil deity of hatred, extortion, spite, and hags and stuff like that. I see no possible negative consequences of this. ALSO, the random shard of her sacred crystal (shattered by his TEH SONIK MAJIKZ) hitting his pregnant wife means nothing, I'm sure.

*He destroyed her burgeoning cult to the last woman, followed by shattering her sacred crystal on her own alter after telling her to stay out of their country forever. It's worth noting that this particular set of hilly areas used to be (as in hundreds of years ago) the site of a foul monastery dedicated to her. She caused all her monks to go mad, kill themselves, then come back as zombies that hung out murdering people who got to close. I also happened to cleanse the hills of those zombies a few months back. Nope. No possible negative consequences.