Justice League Film, or, How the fuck does The Town have a 94% on Rotten Tomatoes?

[Magus]

The Town was easily one of the most godawful experiences I've had in my life. I haven't been tortured by the Viet Cong but I'm presuming watching it is a good substitute for bamboo shoots being inserted under your fingernails. Everything about the movie is horrible, from the dumb-as-fuck plot to the stupidly ridiculous costumes Ben and his crew wear (OOH THEY'RE DRESSED AS ZOMBIE NUNS. THAT'S SO EDGY) to the ten minute monologues delivered in grating Bostonian that Ben Affleck wrote for himself to deliver in probably the worst case of authorial self-insertion since Stephen fucking King. By an hour and a half into what felt like three goddamn hours but what I am told was actually only slightly over two hours I was actively cheering for the detective character to catch Affleck (who by the way is one of the most evil fucks in existence but is painted as a saint by the movie. A wordy, egotistical saint). My heart was broken by the fact that he escaped on a bus at the end there (yes, on a bus. A goddamn bus).

Is there some kind of Hollywood blind spot for movies based in Boston or something? I felt the same way about this when they gave Scorsese a pity Oscar for The Departed, a goofy, campy, shitty remake of an excellent Korean film called Infernal Affairs. It was like, "Hey, we never gave you an Oscar yet even though you're one of the best directors of all time. Here, let's give you one for not only your worst film, but one of the worst movies of the decade. Now, then, my fellow Hollywood elite, to the sex dungeon for the orgy and opium party!"

Ahem.

I say all this because it appears that Warner Bros., in their infinite wisdom, has offered the directorial role of the Justice League live-action movie to one Ben Affleck, director of The Town.

Originally Posted by The AV Club

According to Variety, Ben Affleck has become the first director to be offered the opportunity to helm Warner Bros.' upcoming Justice League, and then most likely turn it down, citing some sort of scheduling conflict or other obfuscating reason to hide the fact that he doesn't want to touch it. The studio has reportedly already begun the process of approaching Affleck, no doubt reminding him of how much they enjoyed The Town, Gone Baby Gone, and the upcoming Argo, and telling him that they would so love to see him bring those same gritty, grounded sensibilities to a larger tentpole picture—probably a sales pitch very similar to when they previously offered him films like Gangster Squad and Man Of Steel before Affleck politely refused, finally agreeing to film The Stand more or less out of pity at this point.

While nothing is official yet, Affleck is expected to pretend to consider the project for an obligatory day or so, before similarly saying thanks but no thanks to spending the next several years on the onus of mounting Warners' Avengers competitor and rebooting Batman post-Christopher Nolan—almost assuredly saying something about "having too much respect for the material" or something like that, all while thinking to himself, essentially, "Fuuuuuuuuck that." Affleck is also expected to wish that people writing about it won't dig up that obvious Hollywoodland photo of him in a Superman suit.

Fuck this noise.

[Ecks]

warner is fucking stupid yo

[mauve]

I like to remember the Justice League as "that cartoon that was pretty awesome." I'd be totally cool with having it stay that way. I mean, if they could manage to make a Justice League movie that was as surprisingly entertaining as the Avengers movie, I'd be cool with that, but I rather doubt that they could.

Plus, given the fact that Green Lantern would most likely be in a Justice League movie, and that the latest Green Lantern movie was... disappointing... I'm pretty sure people will go into theaters being skeptical from the get-go.

[Bells]

i just keep hammering the same keys on that subject.. they should just bring on board the people who wrote and worked on the Justice League cartoon and use it as a guiding direction for a live action project.

The Secret Origins episodes that started the whole Justice League cartoon would be awesome in Live Action. It works on the premise that people already know who the characters are (to some extent) and moves from there... and i still think that's a totally viable way to do this.

[greed]

But see people only really know Supes and Batman. They probably know of Wonder Woman but the most they could probably tell you is "she's tough" and "is a lesbian bondage enthusiast I think?". GL (yeah I know he just had a movie but it sucked and did not get seen by many people so they're gonna have to assume the audience did not watch it), Flash and whoever else they're using is gonna be a total unknown though.

[Professor Smarmiarty]

Fuck origin stories. They are shitty screenwriting lazyness. 90% of the problems with superhero films would be solved if they just banned fucking origin stories.

[greed]

Oh I agree. I'm just doing the devil's advocate of what the suits would demand. Which is Origins for everybody. Even Superman and Batman. And the villains. And maybe the LIs.

[BloodyMage]

I think most people would want to know why Superman is working with a bunch of people whose powers he already possesses and in some cases where he doesn't have the same powers has powers which can do something similar and more powerfully.

[Lumenskir]

They probably know of Wonder Woman but the most they could probably tell you is "she's tough" and "is a lesbian bondage enthusiast I think?".

I really think you're overestimating how many people know of WW's early comic book history. At most, for people over a certain age, Wonder Woman is this theme song and the knowledge that Lynda Carter has capital knockers. For everyone else in the general non-Internet public who hasn't been exposed to that, she's maybe "Superman with boobs?"

Which is Origins for everybody. Even Superman and Batman. And the villains. And maybe the LIs.

I don't think it'll be that bad. I'd hope that even fatcat executives would realize that if you give everyone an origin story in the same movie, even if it's just 5 minutes for each, would eat up the first third to half. I'm guessing we'll see the origin of the Justice League and a vague sketch of the characters (Flash funny, Batman serious, yadda yadda) and then origin story it up for the subsidiary movies. But I am assuming a baseline level of competence in regards to running time/pace.*

*Cue this line being quoted followed by something snarky that boils down to "Executives lol".

[Bells]

Still all the big bets are on the next movie "The Man of Steel" which is rumored to set the tone for a justice league movie. It's the movie that is supposed to allow for a multiverse and MAYBE copy Marvel by dropping hints...

I mean, they already have to reboot Green Lanter and Batman for it, rebooting Superman right after his new movie would be another ten levels of stupid...