"Film Critics" or "Why Can't Old People Enjoy Movies?" - Page 2

Nique · 08-16-2012, 12:41 PM

Critics are basically useless in determining if anyone will enjoy a movie or not. But I do enjoy reading them/ watching them because they do tend to provide some interesting analysis of the structure of the film.

Solid Snake · 08-16-2012, 08:42 PM

Changing the subject entirely from movie critics because who the fuck wants to talk about critics, one semi-sorta-related tidbit I'll add is that, while there are many things I do not miss about old-school cinema (racism, sexism, white men playing every role, rampant nationalism) I really do miss all those scenes from older Golden Era style movies where you just got to see actors act, as opposed to, y'know, reacting to CGI explosions everywhere and holy shit it's just a neverending escalation of punching and kicking and bullets and sex and here's MORE sex and MORE explosions

Like I just watched this old-school movie yesterday on the Military Channel about John F. Kennedy commanding a boat in World War II, and the entire time I was like "This bullshit is clearly an exaggerated account that makes Kennedy into a jingoistic hero, the music is clearly manipulating the audience into believing the Japanese are evil and the Americans are saints, the Pacific Islander natives were stereotyped and completely miscast, and there literally are no women here."

But I was also honestly like: "Holy shit! There are multiple minutes spent here actually listening to characters talk! The characters can actually behave like human beings! The camera's not jumping all over the fucking place!!! The narrative isn't a constant series of graphic violent action scenes! There's no women around presented solely for their sex appeal as objectified eye candy!"

And shit, that's one of the worse so-called 'classic' movies out there.

TLDR: Take the liberal progressivism of the future (if not the modern era, because let's face it, we're still not all the way there yet) and mix it with the actual movie-making techniques of yesteryear, and you'd have a real genuine bona fide Platinum Age of cinema.

Nique · 08-16-2012, 09:41 PM

I want Snake to review every movie like this:

'Too much sex, not enough lawyers having sex'

Professor Smarmiarty · 08-17-2012, 03:44 AM

Snake- watch better movies. There are plenty of fantastic movies that meet your criteria, I don't even know how that is a valid complaint.
Two films that are coming out soon that shouldbe all actory- The Master comes out in September and PT Anderson is always a good bet, and Lincoln comes out in November which will be shit but it Daniel Day Lewis playing motherfucking Lincoln which should give you an actor orgasm.

Lumenskir · 08-17-2012, 04:16 AM

Well, in Snake's defense, and speaking a little from shared experience, it's hard to devote the energy and time necessary to keep up with the non-major studio releases (reading reviews and news to see which ones are actually interesting/engaging rather than sollipstic and dull, finding the smaller theaters where they're even playing, etc.) while you're also spending time and effort on law school, worrying about law school and job prospects, entertainment you find it easier to find/immediately enjoy, and constantly telling those damn kids to get off your lawn.

Professor Smarmiarty · 08-17-2012, 05:17 AM

In the time it takes to write one snake post you could read the entire release schedule for 2012

Solid Snake · 08-17-2012, 09:21 AM

Oh, there are a few phenomenal releases every year; I didn't mean to dispute that.

Hardly any of them tend match the lower-key, dialogue-heavy majesty of some Golden Era favorites, though.
Oscar Bait movies are so obvious in December that I also find that kind of annoying, because they too tend to follow strikingly similar scripts, but instead of "Violence and Sex, Sex and Violence" it's more like "Here's an amazingly oversimplified trope about believing in yourself and hope and faith! Let's run with that!"

Professor Smarmiarty · 08-17-2012, 09:44 AM

Yep- oscar bait movies are terribad, even worse than blockbusters which are mostly fun.
If you avoid either of these two extremes there are great movies to be had.
I see your point about number of films but I think that might be more just age than anything- we tend to forget the terrible films and just remember the best films of the time. Everyone complains about remakes now but in the golden age of holiday they would remake films like every year cause fuck it, people can't just watch the old one.
But like in 60 years people will probably still watch There will be blood but not transformers 3

Bum Bill Bee · 08-17-2012, 09:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Solid Snake

TLDR: Take the liberal progressivism of the future (if not the modern era, because let's face it, we're still not all the way there yet) and mix it with the actual movie-making techniques of yesteryear, and you'd have a real genuine bona fide Platinum Age of cinema.

You know, I can't always understand people who say "popular mass media isn't liberal enough". To me pop culture is overwhelmingly and sometimes preachyiliy liberal between Glee, Modern Family, Northern Exposure, Gargoyles, Captain Planet, Avatar (both kinds), His Dark Materials, Series of Unfortunate Events, a lot of recent Simpson's episodes, anything written by Brian Vaughn or Joss Whedon, Eragon, Oprah, 4Kids censorship, Fergully, Gaga, Discworld, Dinosaurs, Animorphs...

I love a lot of those things and I understand concern over nationalism, sexuality, and there being too many white males. But how is today's popculture overwhelmingly conservative? Name me 30 franchises created from the last 20 years that you feel are sickingly Republican-like. I'd be fascinated to hear what you think.

And, More on Topic: Smarty hit the nail on the head about movies and aging.

Professor Smarmiarty · 08-17-2012, 10:17 AM

PopCulture is conservative out hthe ass- it's all about the petty frivolous trials of rich dudes and how their emotional journeys are great struggles of huge import.
Man when was the last time we had a tv show starring a homeless dude. That would be ace. I'll fucking write it.
Like it'll basically be friends but instead of a bunch of unfunny, vapid, morally decrepit twentysomethings it'll be about a bunch of classy hobos.

08-16-2012, 08:42 PM	#12
Solid Snake Erotic Esquire Join Date: Nov 2003 Posts: 5,563	Changing the subject entirely from movie critics because who the fuck wants to talk about critics, one semi-sorta-related tidbit I'll add is that, while there are many things I *do not* miss about old-school cinema (racism, sexism, white men playing every role, rampant nationalism) I really do miss all those scenes from older Golden Era style movies where you just got to see actors act, as opposed to, y'know, reacting to CGI explosions everywhere and holy shit it's just a neverending escalation of punching and kicking and bullets and sex and here's MORE sex and MORE explosions Like I just watched this old-school movie yesterday on the Military Channel about John F. Kennedy commanding a boat in World War II, and the entire time I was like "This bullshit is clearly an exaggerated account that makes Kennedy into a jingoistic hero, the music is clearly manipulating the audience into believing the Japanese are evil and the Americans are saints, the Pacific Islander natives were stereotyped and completely miscast, and there literally are no women here." But I was also honestly like: "Holy shit! There are multiple minutes spent here actually listening to characters talk! The characters can actually behave like human beings! The camera's not jumping all over the fucking place!!! The narrative isn't a constant series of graphic violent action scenes! There's no women around presented solely for their sex appeal as objectified eye candy!" And shit, that's one of the *worse* so-called 'classic' movies out there. TLDR: Take the liberal progressivism of the future (if not the modern era, because let's face it, we're still not all the way there yet) and mix it with the actual movie-making techniques of yesteryear, and you'd have a real genuine bona fide Platinum Age of cinema. __________________ *WARNING:* Snek's all up in this thread. Be prepared to read massive walls of text.

08-17-2012, 09:21 AM	#17
Solid Snake Erotic Esquire Join Date: Nov 2003 Posts: 5,563	Oh, there are a few phenomenal releases every year; I didn't mean to dispute that. Hardly any of them tend match the lower-key, dialogue-heavy majesty of some Golden Era favorites, though. Oscar Bait movies are so obvious in December that I also find that kind of annoying, because they too tend to follow strikingly similar scripts, but instead of "Violence and Sex, Sex and Violence" it's more like "Here's an amazingly oversimplified trope about believing in yourself and hope and faith! Let's run with that!" __________________ *WARNING:* Snek's all up in this thread. Be prepared to read massive walls of text.

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08-17-2012, 03:44 AM	#14
Professor Smarmiarty Sent to the cornfield Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: K-space Posts: 9,758	Snake- watch better movies. There are plenty of fantastic movies that meet your criteria, I don't even know how that is a valid complaint. Two films that are coming out soon that shouldbe all actory- The Master comes out in September and PT Anderson is always a good bet, and Lincoln comes out in November which will be shit but it Daniel Day Lewis playing motherfucking Lincoln which should give you an actor orgasm.

08-17-2012, 05:17 AM	#16
Professor Smarmiarty Sent to the cornfield Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: K-space Posts: 9,758	In the time it takes to write one snake post you could read the entire release schedule for 2012

08-17-2012, 09:44 AM	#18
Professor Smarmiarty Sent to the cornfield Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: K-space Posts: 9,758	Yep- oscar bait movies are terribad, even worse than blockbusters which are mostly fun. If you avoid either of these two extremes there are great movies to be had. I see your point about number of films but I think that might be more just age than anything- we tend to forget the terrible films and just remember the best films of the time. Everyone complains about remakes now but in the golden age of holiday they would remake films like every year cause fuck it, people can't just watch the old one. But like in 60 years people will probably still watch There will be blood but not transformers 3

08-17-2012, 10:17 AM	#20
Professor Smarmiarty Sent to the cornfield Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: K-space Posts: 9,758	PopCulture is conservative out hthe ass- it's all about the petty frivolous trials of rich dudes and how their emotional journeys are great struggles of huge import. Man when was the last time we had a tv show starring a homeless dude. That would be ace. I'll fucking write it. Like it'll basically be friends but instead of a bunch of unfunny, vapid, morally decrepit twentysomethings it'll be about a bunch of classy hobos.