Nice guys finish last? - Page 6

Mirai Gen · 08-19-2005, 02:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Staizer

The biggest problems come when people just don't communicate, because everyone starts making assumptions and feelings get hurt and hearts get broken. Try speaking up instead of moping and complaining.

Thank you. Thank you THANK YOU.

I have heard way too many god damn stories of "Oh man I think she's cheating on me/being too harsh/too demanding/too restricting/whatever" followed by "But I won't say anything..."

Breakup, cued about a month later.

PLEASE. A relationship STARTS with talking, and it can KEEP GOING with talking. Blah.

Anyway, on topic...

Zero: Please, please run spellchecker, think about what you're posting, and monitor yourself. You just contradicted yourself so badly...

Red Mage Black · 08-19-2005, 02:45 PM

Shiney, Staizer, Mirai, I have tried all of these things you've said, in the past. You see I was a what you would call a "nice guy". Just a few months ago, this girl I listened use to talk with(we were just friends), I told her that I liked her. Then a few months later(last month) she told me that she couldn't date me because I was too much of a brother to her.

Some things in both rants are true, but most of them don't prove anything more then things friends do. You won't get a girl by simply being their friend for years on end. That's a mistake I made.

It doesn't always work just to tell them. Situations like that can happen and can often be discouraging. So I say to always have a back up just in case things don't turn up as you planned.

Concluding my post, some things in both rants are true, but most of them don't prove anything more then things friends do. You won't get a girl by simply being their friend for years on end. That's a mistake I made.

Staizer · 08-19-2005, 05:34 PM

of course there will be times when the things that we say will help, don't. Its just general advice. However, the sooner you say something to the person, the less time they have to get adjusted to the way they view you. Once they are used to you a certain way, they don't like you leaving that place where they know you.

Off Topic: RMB, you should tell your friend that you always found incest interesting . . . :p

Dragonsbane · 08-19-2005, 09:08 PM

Staizer, please don't ruin RMB's friendship with this woman. :p

Personally, I think that there is no solid, defining answer to this question. Some girls, especially younger ones (teenagers) ARE attracted to what they see as "dominant" (non-nice) men, ones they would never be able to consider friends. Some would find the concept of going out with a friend to be utterly absurd. However, this rule is neither universal nor a majority, many women are attracted to a kind, sensitive guy who will lend an ear to their problems. As I said earlier, attempting to generalize all women like this is a fallacy of its own.

Illuminatus · 08-19-2005, 09:13 PM

I agree with Dragonsbane. I think the inherent problem lies in trying to find one overidding truth about women or relationships. As easy as it would be if it were true, women are not a sort of collective force. They are individuals possesing unique likes and dislikes, and a thousand other variables that make definition difficult.

Relationships are hard. You get hurt. But placing blame on the other sex doesn't solve any problems. All you can do is look at yourself, and should you find nothing wrong, then get back on the horse.

Squishy Cheeks · 08-19-2005, 09:26 PM

Nice guys only finish last, because they never enter the race. Let's be honest. Most "nice guys" are cowards. Cowardice is a repulsive trait. Now I'm not saying the nice guy should join the army and take suicidal missions to prove his valor. He should actually try to live his life, than live in fear of it. If said nice guy likes a girl he should ask her out, and not try to take the cowardly way of trying to worm into their lives. If it works, good for you. If it fails, oh well it wouldn't have worked any way. Honestly what have you lost?

Staizer · 08-19-2005, 09:26 PM

I agree, was just pointing out the stuff that helps the most. It will never work 100 percent of the time, but it does work as a good base to be open to discussion and say how you feel instead of just assuming that people will know how you feel.

besides, I was just joking about that incest thing, you don't have to get all riled up and stuff, what's up with you guys ganging up against me?!*runs off crying*[/sarcasm]

Xellos · 08-22-2005, 11:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by krylo

Frankly, the whole thing sickens me.

Krylo, have I mentioned lately what an awsome, awsome guy you are?

shiney · 08-23-2005, 02:07 AM

Post limit, thank god.

08-19-2005, 09:13 PM	#55
Illuminatus The Dread Pirate Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Where the wild things are Posts: 1,310	I agree with Dragonsbane. I think the inherent problem lies in trying to find one overidding truth about women or relationships. As easy as it would be if it were true, women are not a sort of collective force. They are individuals possesing unique likes and dislikes, and a thousand other variables that make definition difficult. Relationships are hard. You get hurt. But placing blame on the other sex doesn't solve any problems. All you can do is look at yourself, and should you find nothing wrong, then get back on the horse. __________________ Man, n. An animal so lost in rapturous contemplation of what he thinks he is as to overlook what he indubitably ought to be. His chief occupation is the extermination of other animals and his own species, which, however, multiplies with such insistent rapidity as to infest the whole habitable earth and Canada. -Ambrose Bierce's Devil's Dictionary

08-23-2005, 02:07 AM	#59
shiney Derrrrrrrrrrrrrp. Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: The land of fartz and buttz Posts: 8,266	Post limit, thank god. __________________ boop

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08-19-2005, 02:45 PM	#52
Red Mage Black Sent to the cornfield Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Where the Sun isn't so warm. Posts: 2,673	Shiney, Staizer, Mirai, I have tried all of these things you've said, in the past. You see I was a what you would call a "nice guy". Just a few months ago, this girl I listened use to talk with(we were just friends), I told her that I liked her. Then a few months later(last month) she told me that she couldn't date me because I was too much of a brother to her. Some things in both rants are true, but most of them don't prove anything more then things friends do. You won't get a girl by simply being their friend for years on end. That's a mistake I made. It doesn't always work just to tell them. Situations like that can happen and can often be discouraging. So I say to always have a back up just in case things don't turn up as you planned. Concluding my post, some things in both rants are true, but most of them don't prove anything more then things friends do. You won't get a girl by simply being their friend for years on end. That's a mistake I made.