NPF Avatars IV, Chapter VIII: At the Fountains of Madness

[Bailey]

Syttulg hastily flipped through The Book of Riddles That Are Too Damn Hard and looked up the answer. "Reflect!" He answered as he threw a pebble through the barrier. He thumbed through the book again, rather quickly this time. According to page three, if he got this off quickly enough he could subvert the energy of the answered riddle to form his own.

"The cuter they are, the tougher they fall. Encase them in a little ball."

Sure enough, the reflect barrier twisted slightly and a pokeball dropped to the ground. It popped open to reveal... a magikarp. He glanced at the chart. Apparently, although the riddle reversal had succeeded, he had then rolled a one on the selection chart.

Syttulg sighed. This was going to be a long battle.

[POS Industries]

"...We'll begin with a spin, traveling in the world of my creation..."

Rei had been floating up there with Flare, singing for quite a bit of time as she assessed the most effective manner of attacking the Sphinx. At first, a simple energy shot attack seemed like a good start, but then the Spinx threw up that little prismic rainbow shield, so the android had to spend a minute analyzing that in order to form a plan off attack, and just as she was about to hit the red side, the Sphinx created a new. shinier shield that was now reflecting Flare's attack back at...

...Wait, wasn't Flare attacking the Hydra? How did...

...Rei interrupted her confused musings as she activated her energy shield and enveloped herself, Flare, and Hawk (who had apparently been flying near the two of them at just the right moment). After the orbs collided with the forcefield and exploded in such a manner that might lead the more idiotic observer to believe that it was the fourth of July, Rei looked back down at the battlefield below, ignoring the little bits of stone that were ineffectually bouncing off her shield, and noticed Newb's successful bypass of the mirror riddle spell by throwing something solid at it.

Okay, a pebble is a start, she thought to herself, but we need something that will do more more damage. Something bigger... and angrier....

Rei adjusted her gravity field and moved the airborne trio a bit higher, getting just out of the range of the more annoying rocks that were still being sent her way before deactivating her shield. "Everybody ready now?"

Flare looked over her shoulder inquisitively, "Ready for wha--hey!"

With a quick motion, Rei grabbed Flare by the tail and whipped her around before letting go, sending the lamia careening down toward the Sphinx. Leaving Hawk to his own devices, the android then proceeded to float up to a point directly above the Sphinx's position before deactivating her gravity field, once again leaving her at the mercy of the planet's normal gravity, and she too began hurdling toward her target.

"Prepare for some doom..." Rei grinned, charging up another energy attack as she plummeted to earth.

[Flarecobra]

(Please don't control my character please....it's a petpeeve of mine. I'll let it go, but ask next time.)

I crashed headlong into the Sphinx, and winced. "Owwww....." then looking over and seeing what I had crashed into, instient stuck, and I bit into the Sphinx's backside, injecting my own hemotoxic venom into her, and just held onto her.

[mauve]

"I'm going to start mauling you now." snarled the Sphinx, showing off the curved claws that suddenly extended from her velvety paws. Mauve's eyes narrowed into bluish slits.

"You can try," she countered. The deadly competition had begun.

The sphinx sprang towards the mage with all the grace and ferocity of leopard, extending her ivory claws to tear the human to shreds. Mauve spun the knives deftly in her hands, building up a spell in her mind's eye and preparing to strike. This would be the ultimate battle between magic-using woman and magic-using beast. This would--

WHAP! In an unexpected turn of events, a flying snake-woman fell from the sky and impacted with the Sphinx's back. The Sphinx was knocked over by the force of the blow and hit the ground. Flarecobra didn't let go, but sunk her fangs into the Sphinx's flesh.

"And now it's raining lamia?!" Mauve yelped, dumbstruck. "The Apocalypse truly IS upon us! Although the lamia attack from above was incredibly helpful..." She looked up, possibly expecting to see the giant comet hovering a few feet above their heads. Instead, she saw Rei. "Oh. I get it. Rei pulled a Hannibal." Mauve's favorite story about Hannibal was the one where he catapulted clay pots full of live snakes at enemy warships. It left disturbing yet hilarious mental images. Mauve found herself snickering at the thought, but remembered that a sphinx who wanted to maul her was standing only a few feet away.

Mauve held out a hand. The sphinx was sufficiently distracted now, I'd say.

"Combust!" she yelled, and both sphinx and lamia were engulfed in flames that appeared to originate from the sphinx herself. Flarecobra would be okay, since she was fire-aligned. Rallied by the sphinx's expression, Mauve started throwing spell after spell at the creature.

[The Artist Formerly Known as Hawk]

Just as Hawk had been about to perform a series of awesome aerial evasive maneouvers involving barrel-rolls, loop-the-loops, freefalls and side to side strafing, he realised that the boulders that had been about to smash him to a pulp suddenly connected with nothing at all and shattered against some sort of invisible barrier around him. The oncoming inferno was similarly diverted.

He looked to his right and quickly realised that REI was the cause of this sudden and miraculous protection. He was about to thank her when she unneccesarily decided to throw Flare at the Sphinx! Before he could completely comprehend the reasoning behind this blatant and unprovoked form of attack, he heard Muave saying "Oh. I get it. Rei pulled a Hannibal."

"Yeah, I taught him that one, except we used snakes, not our own bloody allies!"

It was now that he returned his attention to the battle at hand. While the hyrda had avoided the fireball, he/she/it was now tied up with Hydra (whom Hawk had until now simply ignored (it was just easier to not ask questions)), and the giant mongoose who had finally entered the fray. They all seemed to be having a rather comical scuffle, so Hawk decided to let them be.

Thod was apparently getting angry at Tarrin over the lack of pizza. He decided to let them be.

The flowstone boulder was eating Arhra. Hawk decided to let them be.

So that left everyone to team up on the Sphinx and brutally murderise her!

At this point she seemed to be on fire, while a certain lamia was biting her ass.

"Death from above, whoo-hoooo!!!!"

Hawk began giving her something else to worry about by raining down airblasts, aiming to contact with the fire engulfing her and help spread the burnination.

[Tarrin]

"What this?!" Thod said angrily, rising to his feet, "Taste like cardboard!" This wasn't a good sign.

Tarrin looked up at the unhappy Troll "Well that's the box for the pizza bud" Tarrin had to come up with some plan quick or he'd have a very angry and very dumb, two attributes that made for a dangerous Thod.

Scanning the area quickly a smile grew on his face,
"I know what you need THod my friend" Tarrin rose to his feet slowly and kept his hands where that could be seen "See those tyre tracks over there?" Tarrin pointed towards the Pizzahut delivery cars trail that lead back towards who knows where.

Thod followed Tarrins finger then looked back at the spirit walker, "You see i figured that you'd need to work up a really good apitite" The smile on Tarrins face grew a little more
"What you mean?" Thod looked a bit puzzled and decidedly more upset.
"If you follow those tracks it'll lead you to a place where they'll make Pizza fresh for you, All you could eat and more my fine green friend" Standing before the Troll Tarrin hoped he'd take the bait and race off after the poor delivery driver.

The world seamed to stand still as Tarrin awaited Thods answer, Noise faded from his ears light grew dimmer untill it seamed to be just the two standing in a small spotlight looking at each other waiting for a move of some sort to be made.

[mammothtank]

The enormous blast caused by the colliding Flare spell and concentrated oxygen orb had an odd effect no one seemed to notice - when the resulting concussion wave hit the rip in space-time or whatever it was that Mauve had left behind, it managed to move said rip about a meter to one side. Apparently this also moved the far end of the rip, though considerably more drastically. Just how drastically was demonstrated by the young man that came tumbling through. He was clad in old green clothes that were fairly well stained with black grease, and one hand gripped a large adjustable wrench. His entry was accompanied by a series of sounds that went something like this:

"-uck?" WHUMPF. "Ow."

Squinting, mammothtank climbed to his feet. Only then did he notice that a huge battle was well underway all around him, so heated that he couldn't tell who was on whose side or what was fighting when and why. Luckily though, between the multi-headed hydra, the flying lamia, the blond mage, the troll, the sphinx, and the convoy of pizza delivery trucks, somehow he had remained unnoticed so far. This was fortunate; considering how distracted he had become looking from one combatant to the next and that his weapons and armor were put away for the time being, he was ill equipped to defend himself should any of them throw an attack in his direction...

[Steel Shadow]

Steel stepped back as the purplish gas clouded around the hydra and the giant... actually, Steel had no idea what that thing was, having never seen a mongoose before. He just assumed it was another one of these weird past enemies. True, he hadn't seen it in the temple, but the NPF'ers were responsible for a number of atrocities across the years. It could be after any one of them. And then there was the humo-hydra thing. That was just plain creepy. Probably a good thing for everyone if it got wiped off the face of the planet. Unfortunately he'd seen Arhra going around with it earlier and the chaos being had already poisoned him. Getting on her bad side was probably a bad idea.

Steel shook his head. He was getting sidetracked. Back to business. That gas was certainly poison. Everyone knew purple things were poisonous. Snakes, drinks, hula-hoops... Which meant Steel would have to be careful. Muttering about how he'd just gotten it back how he liked it, he retied his bandana over his face, making a crude cowboy mask. It probably wouldn't help to much, but any added protection was a plus.

He took a deep breath. Having his whole defense mechanism rely on how long he could go without air could really make holding his breath allot easier. He was no Guybrush Threepwood, but he could manage for a while. He'd have to be fast though.

The thought sparked something in his brain. Fast. He could be fast. He could control time for gods sakes, fast should be no problem. Now how to do that...? The answer came quickly and simply. The universe seemed to slow around him, though not quite standing still. "That’s better" he muttered, sounding weird to anyone who could hear him. Taking another breath, he ran forward into the fight.

It was... weird. They fight was chaotic, but all in slow motion. Steel didn't wait to enjoy the view though, this would be burning through his power all to quickly. He locked his sights on his first target, the hydra. It was mostly busy trying to entangle the giant whatsit, but a few of its heads were looking his way. They began moving towards him, probably far to fast for the human eye to track. Normally.

Steel dodged to the side of the first head, using his sword to block the next one, then jumping on top of the last one. The snake recovered quickly, launching new assaults. He didn't have time to let them reach him though. He ran along the long stretching neck of the head he'd landed on, relying on his speed to keep him balanced, dodging any obstacles that came along long before they had time to notice him. Luckily most of the heads were distracted by other opponents.

Then he reached his goal, the base of the neck, where the main body split apart. He struck quickly, severing the heads that had been after him. Then he set about doing the same to the rest of them. hopefully it wouldn't notice until it was to late.

[Arhra]

The sphinx had been surprised to have something fall upon her, more so to find it attmepting to entangle her and biting her from behind. Being set on fire only made things worse.

"Flame fuel my fury!" the sphinx cried in pain, calling upon magic of affinities. She felt it take hold, a bright flame burning within her, the pain of the flames being pushed from her mind. She raked at Flare's coils enraged, wriggling bonelessly out of them. Her shielding spell was still effective, saving her from the worst of the spells Mauve pelted at her. She glowered, eyes red with bloodlust.

Nearby was the swirling chaos of where the hydra fought. From glimpses through the mist, it seemed to have lost several heads, although someone had clearly forgotten an important part of hydra lore. Two were sprouting in the place of each one lost, the stumps not having been sealed. Even so, it looked sorely pressed. The boulder she could not see immediately and Thod had been lured off by the low cunning of the NPFers.

They were in danger of being overwhelmed. And could she not see the hated one. "Retreat!" the sphinx cried, snarling in rage. The hydra exhaled again, thickening the miasma that hung about it.

"Cloudburst!" the sphinx yelled, the cloud of poisonous miasma ripping open into a blinding, pinkish haze. It flowed outwards, a thick, almost solid mass of vapour, thankfully not nearly as dangerous as the purple mist.

The NPFers' attackers seemed to simply vanish.

* * *

Arhra panted for breath after her exertions, choking slightly on the cloying vapour. Fighting off the rock beast had been hard. She could the bony clacking of applause behind her before feeling a cold, skeletal hand on her shoulder.

"That was most impressive the way you fought that murderous rock, my dear." came Lumaes' merry voice, "It put up quite a fight for a lowly invertebrate! Quite amazing the way you sent it packing. I've entirely revised my opinion of you!"

"I was a bit worried when it swallowed me, but, well, you know the rest..." Arhra said modestly. She trailed off. "Why didn't you help me?" she added accusingly.

"I am a coward." Lumaes said pleasantly, flashing a bony grin. Skulls are very good at grinning. "Besides, we both know if you had been a useless midget that could be done in by a mere rock, you'd have come back as something presumably less useless."

Arhra looked slightly embarrassed at this, "Actually, I'd prefer not to have to do that. I had to subdivide my essence to make something possible for the plan... and that isn't easily done. I don't know what exact effect only part of me dying would have..."

Lumaes turned his most powerful inquisitive expression on her at this admission. "Talking about the scheme endangers the scheme!" Arhra shouted in answer.

Abruptly turning away, she flailed her arms to help try and clear the air a little. "Is everyone alright?! Yell out if you're dead!"

OOC: This is more just to give everyone a brief break in fighting and to let me finalise some monster profiles. Might be a little hectic jumping straight into a new fight.

[mammothtank]

MT was the first to step out of the fading haze, and he appeared to have taken the time to re-equip; he now wore a shining mail of armor that didn't appear to fit him perfectly, and on his back sat a very large blade. There was still a black smear on the side of his face however.

"Now that I'm not a sitting target, could someone explain what's going on here?" he asked of whoever could hear. As he looked around and realized the faces he saw were familiar, old memories began returning to him. Naturally, this caused him to start muttering to himself. "Wait... elf... merman... slime dragons... Santa... message..." As the possible reasoning behind his contrived entrance dawned on him, MT was left with but one thing to say:

"Oh no, not again."