Return of Let's Play FF6: The Bride of Let's Play FF6

[Lord Setheris]

Originally Posted by pocheros

You mean she.

Anyways, out of peer pressure I'll vote Hefner.

He, she.. whats the difference? On the intra-webs, we're all just little boxes.
Also, my apologies.

[Kerensky287]

Alright! Placeholder post!

The whole thing is 158 screenshots long, so I'm probably gonna have to do 2 posts again.

As a side note: I never DID see those episodes 9-11... having difficulty, umm, viewing them.... ahem...

EDIT: Chapter 15 is GO!

So, the votes were tallied, and the decision is final:



Setzer will be named Kamina Hefner! Because I'm still a slave of the people.





And so we have a target.

So, Hefner is planning on kidnapping Maria from an Opera, eh? And Store just happens to look exactly like Maria? And Hefner just happens to be the ONLY person who can help us do our job?

If only all this information was useful in some way!



We haven't been here yet. It's a little south of Jidoor. Of course, by "a little" I mean there are like 3 forests in between and I got in a bunch of random battles on the way. Kinda makes you wonder how the rich people actually get to the opera house... do they have a different mode of transportation? Tanks, perhaps? Maybe a hidden underground tunnel? Or perhaps they're all secretly powerful monks!

This is a plot thread that must be left for another time.





"Any news on why? He said he was marrying her, but he doesn't sound like the monogamous type."



Hefner will make his entrance at the climax. Got it.



Jump out and nab him? He plans to kidnap Maria in front of a massive crowd among people who will most likely be armed with swords. He's probably going to have an escape plan.



"Also that's a stupid, stupid idea!"









Again, I see major flaws in this plan.

It's hard to "follow" someone into the sky.



Were people this stupid in the SNES version?



Cocke: "We JUST EXPLAINED THIS!"



Impressario: "I never said that."



You know, I'm going to laugh when Hefner blows the hell out of the roof, grabs Maria and flies off with his jetpack.







And then she knocks everyone out of her way in order to get to the actress's room.







This is a terrible, terrible plan.

At least they're trying, though.





Wait, a letter?! Oh, no! Our only weakness! Ultros knows that the party has no respect for private property!

He could write damn near anything and we'd believe it instantly!



And then they walk into the changing room.

Cocke: "Tranquil as a forest, but on fire within...!"

*close*



There's one hurdle we don't need to worry about anymore.



And now for the most memorable scene in the game!

And you can sing along, too!







Harsh. A chicken hit-and-run.





...Those aren't his lines.



Cocke: "What the fuck is this? LEARN THE GODDAMN LYRICS!"



Cocke: "This night may not be a TOTAL loss."



...Ultros must have given up on his letter idea. It would have been right below where Cocke is at this point.



I wonder how many times Cocke's said "Daaaaayum" by this point?



Cocke: (Must... not... ruin... moment!)



You're a dumbass.





Cocke: (She's onto me! CRAP!)



Smooth.





"I've been practicing singing in Rock Band for three hours now. I'm as ready as I'll ever be."



Screw you, I'm listening to the song RIGHT NOW. I don't need to memorize no goddamn lyrics! It's not like they've changed or anything.









(At this point in the game you have to choose between two different options for the next lines, which is why you need to memorize the song)













See? Nothing bad happened!



OH SNAP! A ghost!!





(And here, he moves around for a little while and you have to "talk" to him to make him continue. Your time is limited; the song continues on its merry way without you)







...Did he just turn into a bouquet of flowers? Because those were NOT there before.





For some reason this part doesn't show up until the end of the actual song. Flip tape to side two! These lyrics start at 4:14.







...So was she hallucinating or something? Because again, those flowers weren't there at the start of the scene. For that matter, what kind of crazy special effects did they USE to make a person turn into a bouquet of goddamn flowers?!



Way to ruin the moment.

Scene two!





Awwww.



WHAT'S THIS?! It's the return of the dreaded envelope!

What could be in it? A false change of plans on Hefner's part? A distraction to get the heroes out of the way? Some shocking piece of evidence of Cocke's dark past that will result in him being forced to hold back during the mission?!



...Ultros is a fucking moron.

He's probably gonna screw up anyway. Well, time to go catch the rest of the scene... wait, what's this?



May as well read ahead, see what's gonna happen next.



Okay, saw that.... and, uh....



...

He didn't FUCKING WRITE A SCENE TWO?!



Cocke: "Yeah! She's out there with no idea of what the hell's going on! She's doing the entire thing improvised!"
Impressario: "B-but it took an hour to write! I thought it would take an hour to act out! We were gonna save it for part two!"
Cocke: "What the hell's everyone else doing out there then?!"



















...This is really well done considering that the script was entirely blank.



Whozis? Oh. Right. Ultros.





The impressario just watched Ultros lug that massive object across the entire catwalk. And he thought nothing of it.

The sheer stupidity of the people in this game is beginning to ruin it for me.



...You know, at this point I can only imagine him pausing to take a whole bunch of measurements, and then calculate exactly how long it will take.

Because, yes, it will take 5 minutes ON THE DOT.



I C WUT U DID THAR



After making it across the rat-infested walkway...



We find Ultros! But he has the element of surprise when he jumps behind and pushes us off!



But stupidity again rears its ugly head.



...And everyone falls 50 feet to the ground. Luckily, they... uh, had invisible parachutes. Sure, let's go with that.

[Lord Setheris]

Originally Posted by Kerensky287

Alright! Placeholder post!

The whole thing is 158 screenshots long, so I'm probably gonna have to do 2 posts again.

As a side note: I never DID see those episodes 9-11... having difficulty, umm, viewing them.... ahem...

First. Ok not really. I'm so far from first its hilarious. The important thing is that Kerensky is the greatest man to walk the earth since Muhammad, possible jesus. I reccomend him for every medal given by every country in the world.

[Kerensky287]

Ahem. Two posts.



Yeah... the play's kinda ruined, isn't it?



...IS HE DOING THIS IN CHARACTER?!



When in Rome...

...oh, crap, he slipped up with the naming...



Well, there have been worse plots. And the whole thing was improv up to this point ANYWAY, so...



I love the Impressario facepalm sprite.



Ultros' speech really seems fitting here if you give him Yoshimitsu's voice.

"It is the sword that is evil, NOT THEE!"

*helicopters off*







Hello again.







I fucking hate Ultros.



...He escapes, stage left.

I'm sure we won't see him again, though.

...



Alright! Mission accomplished! The crowd goes WILD!



...Shit.





AHA! JETPACK!





"The grotto needs some... ahem... new talent!"



"We deny all allegations that we were informed of this event a week ahead of time!"





Aria de Mezzo Carattere Forever. Coming in 20XX.



Well, that plan failed royally, as I predicted. Hefner DID fly off, carrying Store with her. And he's gotten her changed into skimpy clothing already!

The skimpy stuff just happens to look exactly like her regular clothes.



...



The Returners won't let a little thing like gravity get in the way of progress.

Cocke: "Hey, how'd you get your old clothes back so fast?"





"It's time to bust out of here!!"



Busted.

And no, I'm afraid the party is NOT Maria.





Hefner: "Sniff... I feel so used..."









Flattery will get you everywhere. And money makes the world go round.

Speaking of which, wonder how much we'd have to pay to make Hef part with his awesome jetpack?



Hefner has a casino on his personal airship. The bunnies need a place to play, don't they?



"They took all my talent for some sleazy bar in an occupied town! I was planning to use Maria to get some revenue going again."







"You missed my point."





Hefner: "I mean, think about it! It's a win-win situation."

Store accepts.





Store walks over to Eunuch and takes something from him.







Store: "I know! It's great either way!"





The tension is killing me.





THE CHEATING BITCH!



Oh, right. It was Eunuch's. Remember back when they did the coin toss? "Heads you get your freedom, tails I get mine"? Eunuch forgot he was only carrying the one coin.

He had used it earlier to get some free ice cream, actually.









"I hear adventuring is pretty profitable anyway!"



Nice.



Shut up, Cocke. You just got a fucking AIRSHIP. You know what you're doing? Looking a gift horse in the mouth! And I'm pretty sure that in this game horses breathe fire.





"But yeah, I designed it to be extra-safe. Fate can SUCK IT."





"Hey, while we're at it, maybe we can help Hef get his bunnies back from that occupied town!"





And now we have an airship!

No decisions tonight. Sorry.

[Ryong]

Cocke's a skilled thief, he totally double-jumped at the last possible second there. Eunuch has a cape to slow down his fall ( somehow ) and AHNULD is a monk. He can fall without getting hurt. Permanently. Seriously though, not only did someone carry a 4-ton weight across a catwalk, said catwalk also resists it and said someone is A PURPLE TALKING FANGED OCTOPUS. What are they, blind and deaf?

[Kerensky287]

I edited some of the first post by the way.

...I really need to stop thinking about Gurren Lagann.

[Loyal]

The double-headed coin gig was just begging for an "I make my own luck!" line of some sort.

[BitVyper]

Originally Posted by Kerensky287

...I really need to stop thinking about Gurren Lagann.

....Do... do you just hate being a man, or what? Obviously you haven't watched ENOUGH.

[Amake]

I lol'd. Repeatedly. The question that should be on everyone's mind is, is there such a thing as a "fake actress"?

And yeah, it's always puzzled me how the Light Warriors Returners manage to sneak on board the world's only flying machine in the air. I'm thinking AHNULD beat up gravity and took its lunch money.

[Kerensky287]

It's not that I don't watch enough Gurren Lagann. It's just that when it comes right down to it and I have a choice between "Hmm, take screenshots and upload stuff for an hour, or watch giant robots fight each other?" the choice gets pretty obvious.

Also from looking back at these screenshots I realize that I haven't equipped Espers yet. Shit. Maybe I should let you guys pick those?

4 party members: Cocke, Store, Eunuch, Ahnuld
4 espers: Ramuh, Cait Sith, Siren, Kirin

Ramuh is a lightning-type-guy who also teaches Poison, Kirin teaches healing magic, Siren has a few crappy status magics and Fire (first level only) and Cait Sith has a few crappy status magics.

One Esper per party member!

Oh, and Ramuh raises stamina at level up, Siren raises HP at level up and Cait Sith raises Magic at level up. Kirin does squat.