Craptastical Technology - Page 2

The Artist Formerly Known as Hawk · 02-17-2009, 06:05 PM

Man, if you had an Ultra Advanced Psychotronic Money Magnet�, a Tesla Shield and an Ark, would that make you like, God or something? Or just a really badass superhuman? Cos if so then I want these things!

Even more so than the Flying Car.

BitVyper · 02-17-2009, 06:44 PM

How have we gotten this far with no mention of Alex Chiu's immortality rings?

TDK · 02-17-2009, 06:47 PM

Oh good god.

My mom has crystal necklaces. She believes they repel negative energy and blah blah blah, or negative...charges or bad energy or something. I don't really listen.

She babbled something at me about it once, and I responded something along the lines of "you're dumb" and she said well there are positive and negative charges in science aren't there? "Yes." She went on to rant for a bit about how she was right and I should have more faith in her and not believe everything I read in science books. I then pointed out that positives charges (protons) can do just as much damage as negative charges (electrons), at which point she shut up.

I mean, hell, I know there's stuff we don't about the universe and I'm open to the idea that humans (life in general) emit or maybe manipulate/use some kind of energy or something that isn't found elsewhere (or at least isn't really...I dunno.) or something like that, but its all firmly rooted in science, just science we don't have yet.

This is all epic level technobabble with a healthy sprinkling of new age hippy spiritual crap.

Another example: I walked out on my porch once, where my mom was holding a crystal up to the sun. "What the hell are you doing?" "I'm charging my crystal." I looked at her like she was retarded, and then walked away.

Edit: Anyway aside from that. Most of the stuff in the article is stretching the truth heavily (The Schumann Resonance Field, for example, having anything to do with biology or medicine, is purely conjecture and has been disproven pretty hard.) and a large amount of it is just plain lies and making things up.

Nique · 02-17-2009, 07:18 PM

...Maybe your mom is just into LARPing?

PyrosNine · 02-17-2009, 07:22 PM

My natural body possesses enough electro-magnetic force to throw off radios, cell phones, and doodle with any sort of magnet drawing device with just a touch of my finger, I have noticed.

I know that magnets and stuff don't work, because by that logic and my inability to EVER get a proper reception, I should be able to leap over buildings, regenerate lost limbs, and create money with my MIND.

Instead of, y'know, being knocked over by a strong wind and frozen to death in autumn.

Marc v4.0 · 02-17-2009, 07:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bellsouth Minion

http://www.lifetechnology.org/teslashield.htm

So, do you want to be a super human? It only costs $199,95! Or, if you want to open the third eye of your dog... or maybe enhace the psychic abilities of your plants...

Reading the claims of how it works along with looking at the picture of this "device", I've got to say it looks like it would be useful in channeling some key, happy-generating vibrations from the universe directly into some specific female parts.

Bells · 02-17-2009, 07:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PyrosNine

My natural body possesses enough electro-magnetic force to throw off radios, cell phones, and doodle with any sort of magnet drawing device with just a touch of my finger, I have noticed.

I know that magnets and stuff don't work, because by that logic and my inability to EVER get a proper reception, I should be able to leap over buildings, regenerate lost limbs, and create money with my MIND.

Instead of, y'know, being knocked over by a strong wind and frozen to death in autumn.

Then, what the HELL are you doing NOT selling your hair and underpants on Ebay? dont you see? People make thousands of dollars every year with Ouija (sp?) boards, Syntetic crystals, Boxes of tubes and magnets...

Just grab some Foil paper, rub it on your body, make a ball and sell it as the PyrosNine Quantum Warperhnamanuhnum

TDK · 02-17-2009, 07:44 PM

Marc, you're not supposed to say what we're all thinking. <_<

Marc v4.0 · 02-17-2009, 07:55 PM

I really couldn't find anything else to say that wouldn't result in a wall-o-text rant about my enragement at the claims of these devices and/or the inherent stupidity of people who actually buy in to this crap.

I'm all for the ignorant being parted from their money, but not at the expense of scientific understanding or the creation of religious fanatasism. Gone are the days of the clean, honest door-to-door hustler. A class of men and women who would use only their sharp tongues and fast words to sell grandma that fancy foot powder from asia-land that was actually made out of baking soda. Honorable men and women, who got their scams by on the sweat of their brow and the hard work of their mind, not on wrapping the product up in a sheen of "It'll make you immortal and enhance your long-distance healing abilities!".

The Wizard Who Did It · 02-17-2009, 08:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Marc v1.0

I'm all for the ignorant being parted from their money, but not at the expense of scientific understanding or the creation of religious fanatasism. Gone are the days of the clean, honest door-to-door hustler. A class of men and women who would use only their sharp tongues and fast words to sell grandma that fancy foot powder from asia-land that was actually made out of baking soda. Honorable men and women, who got their scams by on the sweat of their brow and the hard work of their mind, not on wrapping the product up in a sheen of "It'll make you immortal and enhance your long-distance healing abilities!".

You haven't heard any stories in olden times about how people tried to peddle off Philosopher's Stones, have you?

02-17-2009, 06:44 PM	#12
BitVyper History's Strongest Dilettante Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Arcadia Posts: 6,662	How have we gotten this far with no mention of Alex Chiu's immortality rings? __________________ "There are worlds out there where the sky is burning, and the sea is asleep, and the rivers dream. People made of smoke and cities made of song. Somewhere there's danger, somewhere there's injustice, somewhere else the tea's getting cold. Come on, Ace; we've got work to do!" Awesome art be here.

02-17-2009, 06:47 PM	#13
TDK Sent to the cornfield Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Reality Posts: 2,914	Oh good god. My mom has crystal necklaces. She believes they repel negative energy and blah blah blah, or negative...charges or bad energy or something. I don't really listen. She babbled something at me about it once, and I responded something along the lines of "you're dumb" and she said well there are positive and negative charges in science aren't there? "Yes." She went on to rant for a bit about how she was right and I should have more faith in her and not believe everything I read in science books. I then pointed out that positives charges (protons) can do just as much damage as negative charges (electrons), at which point she shut up. I mean, hell, I know there's stuff we don't about the universe and I'm open to the idea that humans (life in general) emit or maybe manipulate/use some kind of energy or something that isn't found elsewhere (or at least isn't really...I dunno.) or something like that, but its all firmly rooted in science, just science we don't have yet. This is all epic level technobabble with a healthy sprinkling of new age hippy spiritual crap. Another example: I walked out on my porch once, where my mom was holding a crystal up to the sun. "What the hell are you doing?" "I'm charging my crystal." I looked at her like she was retarded, and then walked away. Edit: Anyway aside from that. Most of the stuff in the article is stretching the truth heavily (The Schumann Resonance Field, for example, having anything to do with biology or medicine, is purely conjecture and has been disproven pretty hard.) and a large amount of it is just plain lies and making things up. Last edited by TDK; 02-17-2009 at 09:15 PM.

02-17-2009, 07:22 PM	#15
PyrosNine Zettai Hero Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: A figment of my own imagination Posts: 6,103	My natural body possesses enough electro-magnetic force to throw off radios, cell phones, and doodle with any sort of magnet drawing device with just a touch of my finger, I have noticed. I know that magnets and stuff don't work, because by that logic and my inability to EVER get a proper reception, I should be able to leap over buildings, regenerate lost limbs, and create money with my MIND. Instead of, y'know, being knocked over by a strong wind and frozen to death in autumn. __________________ Pyrosnine.blogspot.com: An experimental blog of writing. Updated possibly daily. Possibly. A fair chance. Current Works for reading: War Between them, Karma Police. PyrosNine: Weirdo Magnet Extraordinaire!

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02-17-2009, 07:44 PM	#18
TDK Sent to the cornfield Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Reality Posts: 2,914	Marc, you're not supposed to say what we're all thinking. <_<

02-17-2009, 07:55 PM	#19
Marc v4.0 Fight Me, Nerds Join Date: Oct 2008 Posts: 3,470	I really couldn't find anything else to say that wouldn't result in a wall-o-text rant about my enragement at the claims of these devices and/or the inherent stupidity of people who actually buy in to this crap. I'm all for the ignorant being parted from their money, but not at the expense of scientific understanding or the creation of religious fanatasism. Gone are the days of the clean, honest door-to-door hustler. A class of men and women who would use only their sharp tongues and fast words to sell grandma that fancy foot powder from asia-land that was actually made out of baking soda. Honorable men and women, who got their scams by on the sweat of their brow and the hard work of their mind, not on wrapping the product up in a sheen of "It'll make you immortal and enhance your long-distance healing abilities!".