5 minute poetry - Page 120

Osterbaum · 08-14-2005, 07:30 AM

If you don't have any constructive critisism, please keep your comments to your self. This thread is mostly or only for poems, and no one needs to be told how 'bad' their poems are.

And let people write about what they want. And not all poems are about how crappy life is anyway.

A poem is what the poet wants it to be, and I don't know about the other people, but I do not really care about anyones comments, unless they are constructive and more about the construction and not the thoughts in the poem.

Again, please keep that kinds of comments to yourself.

I apologize to anyone who might think I acted too mod like.

***RaiRai*** · 08-14-2005, 09:16 AM

Oster, you said everything just right, my friend.

Toe Nibbler, keep your rude comments to yourself. Your poem wasn't exactly brilliant itself. This isn't a place people write poetry to be told that it's crap. If you can't back that up with any proper critique, shut up.

Shoraru · 08-14-2005, 02:56 PM

Just to add on to it, anyone considering themselvs as a poet attempts to capture the very essence of there writing in a form that attracts others towards there work. Whether a poem is about the fiery light of the sun or the death of a loved one, by conforming this essence, we are able to express our problems, feelings, as well as our thoughts to everyone.

Toe Nibbler's oppression gave me another peice of inspiration so:

Free

Shoraru H.

To have lost all chains,
To have known the light
and
Appreciated it's majesty,
We must be Free,

Free to conform to our own ideas,
Free to believe in others,
Free to know that what we do,
Is what will be,

Free to see as others do,
Free to hear the sounds of the world,
Free to smell the hope that flows,
Free to taste the victory we wish to achieve,
Free to feel the life within us,

Free.

Funka Genocide · 08-15-2005, 03:03 AM

Here�s to the lost and losing
To wasted circumstance
For fools without their bearing
And brilliance left to age

To wanderers and vagabonds
The beautiful yet failed
The child who absconds
Before he learns to hate

To sly and roguish infidels
Cheeky and at ease
To egos made with thinnest steel
Tempered in white flame

To the vainly brash
And unknown geniuses
To lives made from the ash
Of bridges burnt away

May all your tears be true
And wind not rest ahead
And when it turns from you
May this world find regret

May they weep remembering
The glory of a fool
And may the cold December rain
Not find you without warmth

May all your dreams be wilder still
Than your escapades
And may the sword bow to the quill
In your shadowed hands

and may those bridges burn
so bright they steal the stars
from the eyes that spurn
your careless majesty

Erick Diaz 13 August, 2005

by the way mr. Nibbler, you misspelled "grandure" in your sig there...

and what happened to rep? I miss it!

Funka is sad now.

Overcast · 08-15-2005, 03:12 PM

Been a while...very long while I must say. But nonetheless I feel pretty good.

To disappear..

I stare into the masses.
To a question in my head.
Just staring through my glasses.
Of what happens when I'm dead.

But not to me to others.
After the day I dissapear.
From my sisters or my brothers.
All the ones that hold me dear.

What would happen when they find me.
Would they even care.
Would they be depressed or maybe happy.
As I was fallen there.

But that questioned won't be answered.
Not until the day I die.
Maybe that time I'll choose to master.
To leave the masses for the sky.

Cloud Strife · 08-16-2005, 12:19 AM

In the shade of a tree, a wounded soul sits,
Silently sighing, his heart torn to bits,
Not by a lover, any natural disaster,
But by himself, his destiny's master.

Fate was dealing crookedly again,
Caused the soul to ruthlessly pretend
that everything was in the right,
Although his day was really night.

Ahead of him, a future, bright and clear,
Behind him, burning, was all he held dear.
Not caused by forced beyond his control,
The man was corrupted down to his soul.

His future, so close, was just an illusion,
For Fate, you see, had caused these delusions,
And without a thought, he didn't look back,
How many he hurt, he didn't keep track.

And then...

And then...

She...

Toe Nibbler · 08-16-2005, 10:23 AM

Oh good, the haters get a poem from me. So it was not totally useless disagreeing with someone on this forum after all. Honestly, I think it's fine that everyone likes to make poetry about whatever they want, I just wonder why it has to be about such deep stuff.

shiney · 08-16-2005, 11:37 AM

Maybe because it's fucking poetry.

This is another mod, an admin in fact, telling you to shut your hole and go crawl back under that rock you came from. I'm not pulling any punches around this forum anymore, and I will in fact be as much of a prick as necessary to get rude people to understand when they are being twits and need to be slapped in the mouth for a few hours.

This is one of those times.

Shut up, or I will ban you.

Toe Nibbler · 08-18-2005, 11:04 AM

Alright, you win. Ban me. I'm tired of you shiney. I can't stand you. You're so friggin sure of yourself, and it's rather pathetic. It was fun while it lasted.

Meister · 08-18-2005, 11:29 AM

Sheesh, if you can't keep from flaunting your petty personal grudges, don't be surprised if we do.

08-14-2005, 07:30 AM	#1191
Osterbaum The revolution will be memed! Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: FIN Posts: 5,967	If you don't have any constructive critisism, please keep your comments to your self. This thread is mostly or only for poems, and no one needs to be told how 'bad' their poems are. And let people write about what they want. And not all poems are about how crappy life is anyway. A poem is what the poet wants it to be, and I don't know about the other people, but I do not really care about anyones comments, unless they are constructive and more about the construction and not the thoughts in the poem. Again, please keep that kinds of comments to yourself. I apologize to anyone who might think I acted too mod like. __________________ D is for Dirty Commie!

08-14-2005, 09:16 AM	#1192
*RaiRai* Check mate. Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Down your pants. Posts: 2,210	Oster, you said everything just right, my friend. Toe Nibbler, keep your rude comments to yourself. Your poem wasn't exactly brilliant itself. This isn't a place people write poetry to be told that it's crap. If you can't back that up with any proper critique, shut up. __________________ I AM FURIOUS

08-14-2005, 02:56 PM	#1193
Shoraru Zephyr Mage Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Within the deepest hollows of Yggdrasil Posts: 423	Just to add on to it, anyone considering themselvs as a poet attempts to capture the very essence of there writing in a form that attracts others towards there work. Whether a poem is about the fiery light of the sun or the death of a loved one, by conforming this essence, we are able to express our problems, feelings, as well as our thoughts to everyone. Toe Nibbler's oppression gave me another peice of inspiration so: Free Shoraru H. To have lost all chains, To have known the light and Appreciated it's majesty, We must be Free, Free to conform to our own ideas, Free to believe in others, Free to know that what we do, Is what will be, Free to see as others do, Free to hear the sounds of the world, Free to smell the hope that flows, Free to taste the victory we wish to achieve, Free to feel the life within us, Free. __________________ - Lord Shoraru of the Land of the Sapphire Luna Occupation - Zephyer Acyolte of the Temple of Saruhashi Practicing: Aroma Therapist Poet Novelist Herbalist Psychologist Last edited by Shoraru; 08-14-2005 at 02:59 PM. Reason: Add more info

08-15-2005, 03:03 AM	#1194
Funka Genocide Sent to the cornfield Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Las Vegas Posts: 4,566	To the Lost Here�s to the lost and losing To wasted circumstance For fools without their bearing And brilliance left to age To wanderers and vagabonds The beautiful yet failed The child who absconds Before he learns to hate To sly and roguish infidels Cheeky and at ease To egos made with thinnest steel Tempered in white flame To the vainly brash And unknown geniuses To lives made from the ash Of bridges burnt away May all your tears be true And wind not rest ahead And when it turns from you May this world find regret May they weep remembering The glory of a fool And may the cold December rain Not find you without warmth May all your dreams be wilder still Than your escapades And may the sword bow to the quill In your shadowed hands and may those bridges burn so bright they steal the stars from the eyes that spurn your careless majesty Erick Diaz 13 August, 2005 by the way mr. Nibbler, you misspelled "grandure" in your sig there... and what happened to rep? I miss it! Funka is sad now. Last edited by Funka Genocide; 08-15-2005 at 03:05 AM.

08-15-2005, 03:12 PM	#1195
Overcast Cinderella Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Trespassing in the graveyard Posts: 3,076	Living in a place with no internet for so long is fun Been a while...very long while I must say. But nonetheless I feel pretty good. To disappear.. I stare into the masses. To a question in my head. Just staring through my glasses. Of what happens when I'm dead. But not to me to others. After the day I dissapear. From my sisters or my brothers. All the ones that hold me dear. What would happen when they find me. Would they even care. Would they be depressed or maybe happy. As I was fallen there. But that questioned won't be answered. Not until the day I die. Maybe that time I'll choose to master. To leave the masses for the sky. __________________ Time to bust out the glow sticks!

08-16-2005, 12:19 AM	#1196
Cloud Strife Stranger in a strange land. Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Walla Walla, WA. Posts: 2,846	In the shade of a tree, a wounded soul sits, Silently sighing, his heart torn to bits, Not by a lover, any natural disaster, But by himself, his destiny's master. Fate was dealing crookedly again, Caused the soul to ruthlessly pretend that everything was in the right, Although his day was really night. Ahead of him, a future, bright and clear, Behind him, burning, was all he held dear. Not caused by forced beyond his control, The man was corrupted down to his soul. His future, so close, was just an illusion, For Fate, you see, had caused these delusions, And without a thought, he didn't look back, How many he hurt, he didn't keep track. And then... And then... She... __________________ You know, I'd put up something witty and clever right now, but eh. I'm lazy.

08-16-2005, 10:23 AM	#1197
Toe Nibbler Sent to the cornfield Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: I live on the Throne of La La Land. Posts: 49	Oh good, the haters get a poem from me. So it was not totally useless disagreeing with someone on this forum after all. Honestly, I think it's fine that everyone likes to make poetry about whatever they want, I just wonder why it has to be about such deep stuff. Last edited by Toe Nibbler; 08-16-2005 at 10:23 AM. Reason: Oops..Said "poet" from me

08-16-2005, 11:37 AM	#1198
shiney Derrrrrrrrrrrrrp. Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: The land of fartz and buttz Posts: 8,266	Maybe because it's fucking poetry. This is another mod, an admin in fact, telling you to shut your hole and go crawl back under that rock you came from. I'm not pulling any punches around this forum anymore, and I will in fact be as much of a prick as necessary to get rude people to understand when they are being twits and need to be slapped in the mouth for a few hours. This is one of those times. Shut up, or I will ban you. __________________ boop

08-18-2005, 11:04 AM	#1199
Toe Nibbler Sent to the cornfield Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: I live on the Throne of La La Land. Posts: 49	Alright, you win. Ban me. I'm tired of you shiney. I can't stand you. You're so friggin sure of yourself, and it's rather pathetic. It was fun while it lasted.

08-18-2005, 11:29 AM	#1200
Meister Pure joy Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Germany Posts: 10,689	Sheesh, if you can't keep from flaunting your petty personal grudges, don't be surprised if we do.