D&D Shenanigans

[TDK]

Originally Posted by BitVyper

Okay, no D&D this week again (gah), but here's an old WH40K story. The Legend of the Archer:

It all started when two of my friends were having a game of WH40K. Space Marines vs Tyranids. Space Marines were in trouble. I was bored, and I'd found a vanilla WH archer sitting around - just one of the ordinary guys. As the Tyranids were closing on a group of Marines, I suddenly stuck him on top of a hill and shouted "NOT WHILE I'M AROUND." So began his legend.

The archer has singlehandedly killed a Carnifex. Some orks believe that he is Gork.... or Mork. Some believe him to be a mortal avatar of the Emperor himself. No one really knows anything about him though. He appears on battlefields seemingly out of nowhere, does his work, and vanishes. You never know which side he'll help, just that you don't want to be on the other one. He can singlehandedly darken the sky with an endless supply of arrows. He can outfight orks in close combat; in fact he once garroted a warboss with one of his spare bowstrings. He doesn't have a ship of any kind - instead he fires an arrow which opens a small hole directly to the Warp and cuts a path directly to his destination. Daemons know well enough to leave him alone, and when they see the blazing white glow of his arrow, they run home to their Daemon houses and shut the doors tight.

Ever wonder why Old One Eye only has one eye? Whatever you may have heard about a weakness to plasma weapons and such is a pile of horseshit. The Archer happened to its eye. No one knows why he let it live. Some speculate that he did it just to show the Hive Mind that he could kill anything it made, anytime he wanted.

I've never played Warhammer or 40k, but I've always wanted to.

But that's just fucking epic. XD