Trollslum Act 2: Under siege by planet Jupiter

[Aldurin]

>Be the other troll

A system error causes the command to work without complaint, you are now Aldurin.

>Do shit

Time to work on damage control, in other words getting your hive out of the path of damage. With any luck Caoway will actually be available to start servering your mountain out of here.

View Trollian transcripttechnopathicalAnomaly [TA] began trolling melancholicChumly [MC]
TA: Ok, Nasryl is in and I assume you're alive.
TA: My primary plans for this situation have become subject to complications so now I need you to dump the equipment in the balcony chamber if possible, since this show needs to get on the road, before said road becomes a crater.
TA: I haven't seen any meteors large enough to synchronize with a countdown so hopefully we have time.
TA: And before you say it, yes I'm stressed and too busy to focus on my typing quirk right now.
MC: nek nek
MC: wow a book that writes itself
MC: nek nek nek nek nek!
MC: ooh now it's writing down what i'm saying
MC: this stranger has all of the interesting doodads
MC: all of them nek nek
TA: Caoway, really?
TA: This is not the time for bullshit.

>Troll someone else while Caoway bullshits

View Trollian transcripttechnopathicalAnomaly [TA] began trolling hazardousPracticioner [HP]
TA: hEy Nasryl, I cAn sEE yOU stAndIng thErE
TA: gEt OvEr It, I thInk thE tEsts ArE sUppOsEd tO pUsh Us
TA: AdmIttEdlY thE fIrst fEw sEEmEd rAthEr EAsY fOr thEm
TA: pOInt Is, mY sErvEr Is bEIng . . . dIffIcUlt, sO I hAvE tImE tO hElp yOU OrIEnt yOUrsElf

Dammit, he's not answering. At least he isn't being a retard. You swap windows to your other active conversation.

View first Trollian TranscriptMC: nek nek
MC: what's caoway?
TA: so you're not Caoway?
MC: no
MC: just a caiman named gil nek nek nek nek nek

How nice, a mildly intelligent animal has his computer. Maybe you can play on his misunderstanding of technology.

TA: oh that's bad
MC: why is that bad, talking book?
TA: because as the Caoway's spirit guide, I am obligated to brutally murder those who claim his talking book
TA: PAINFUL murder
MC: neknekneknekneknekneknekneknekneknek!
MC: die talking book
melancholicChumly [MC]'s PDjournal broke

Damn, he just had to put down the book or give it back to Caoway, no heroic bullshit like destroying your only hope for survival.

>Check on Nasryl while you await your doom.

View other Trollian transcriptTA: And hIs cOmpUtEr wAs jUst vAndAlIzEd sO I nEEd tO dO sOmEthIng sO I dOn't frEAk OUt
HP: Xh gXg what is that smell! This place is terrible.
HP: Wait, what are yXu planning Xn dXing?
TA: bUIld yOUr hIvE UpwArds, thAt wAy yOU cAn gEt tO thE shIny AbstrActIOn flOAtIng AbOvE yOU
TA: I'd AlsO bUIld bArrIcAdEs bUt wAlls dOn't sEEm tO dEtEr thEsE trEspAssErs
TA: hAng On, Caoway's tAlkIng tO mE, I'll gEt bAck tO yOU In A mOmEnt

You didn't pay much heed to the creatures approaching Nasryl's hive, and should they actually be a threat then it'll be good for him to practice some self-defensive murder.

>Are you actually talking to Caoway now?

View ANOTHER Trollian transcriptmelancholicChumly [MC] began trolling technopathicalAnomaly [TA]
MC: A conS\ort /juS\t S\mashe/) one of my /journalS\ on a rock becauS\e it threatene/) to kill him.
MC: /)o I even nee/) to aS\k if thiS\ waS\ brouG\ht on by one of your S\henaniG\anS\?
TA: thOsE "cOnsOrts" ArE tOO stUpId tO EvEn prOpErlY fEAr thE sUpErnAtUrAl
MC: ThiS\ iS\ why we can't have nice thinG\S\.
TA: mAYbE I shOUld hAvE trIEd tO mAkE It wOrshIp whAtEvEr It wAs thAt thE cOnsOrt hAd
TA: AftEr I EntEr, wE shOUld trY AgAIn UsIng A "bEnEvOlEnt tAlkIng dEvIcE" plOY
TA: spEAkIng Of EntErIng, whY wAs It thAt mY sErvEr plAyEr lEt A sEntIEnt (And I UsE thAt tErm lOOsElY) AnImAl bAbYsIt hIs cOmpUtEr?
MC: FirS\tly, no. /)on't fuck aroun/) with theS\e G\uyS\' beliefS\. No one /)eS\erveS\ you aS\ a con/)uit to their G\o/).
MC: It'S\ a S\tupi/) i/)ea an/) the conS\ortS\ are here to help you anywayS\.
MC: They're like thoS\e thinG\S\ in G\ameS\ for wriG\G\lerS\, what /)i/) Zebrek call them?
MC: NPCS\.
MC: S\econ/)ly, that waS\ a P/)/journal, not a computer.
MC: LaS\tly, I G\ave it to him to play with S\o he woul/) S\tay out of my /)rea/)lockS\ while I untanG\le/) hiS\ fiS\hinG\ line.
MC: AG\ain.
MC: It not even a biG\ /)eal that he broke it, I ma/)e half of a /)ozen of theS\e thinG\S\ earlier.
MC: I /juS\t wiS\h that you ha/)n't rile/) him up.
MC: Now he won't S\top nekinG\.
TA: wEll wE cAn cOnvIncE hIm thE mAlEvOlEnt spIrIt gUIdE Is dEAd AFTER wE gEt mE Off thIs rOck
TA: I jUst wAnt tO gEt thIs tEst OvEr wIth sO I cAn gEt tO sAfEty And stArt On rEpAIrs
TA: I'm hOpIng fOr sOmEthIng EAsy lIkE whAt yOU gOt, Or Leraje's
TA: sErIOUslY? gOIng tO slEEp As A chAllEngE? thAt's dUmbEr thAn dUmb
TA: sO yEAh lEt's crAck thAt crUxtrUdEr OpEn sO I cAn fEEd thE mEtEOr fAIry sOmEthIng
MC: Hol/) on, I /)i/)n't even inS\tall the S\erver proG\ram yet.
MC: Oh S\hit.
TA: whAt?
MC: A winG\e/) imp /juS\t took my huS\ktop.
MC: I'm G\onna G\o kill it.
TA: I dO nOt ApprOvE Of thIs prOblEm, bUt I dO lIkE thE sOlUtIOn
TA: mY rAdAr rEcIEvEr jUst wEnt OUt sO nOw I hAvE nO AbIlIty tO trAck thE gIAnt spAcE rOck thAt Is dEfInItEly cOmIng tOwArd mE
MC: Um, if you ha/) to G\ueS\S\, how cloS\e woul/) you S\ay it iS\ riG\ht now?
TA: thE mEtEOrs AppEAr OUt Of nOwhErE jUst OUt of OrbIt, sO I wOUld gUEss mAybE 15 mInUtEs If It wErE tO AppEAr rIght nOw
MC: ...
TA: Of cOUrsE thAt lEAvEs OUt thE dAmAgE thAt thE OthEr mEtEOrs ArE InflIcting
TA: AlrEAdY lOst thE cAnnOn I wAs gOIng tO shOOt thE mEtEOr wIth
TA: EvEn If I hAd An hOUr I dOUbt mY hIvE wOUld bE IntAct bY thEn
MC: Well, that iS\n't what I wante/) to hear.
MC: The imp abS\con/)e/), S\o I'm G\oinG\ to have to chaS\e after him.
TA: cOUldn't yOU jUst rUn thE sErvEr On whAtEvEr yOU'rE UsIng rIght nOw?
MC: It'S\ a P/)G\rub mixe/) with a /journal, it'S\ not a real computer.
MC: An/) I can't G\et back to my hive to make another one riG\ht now, S\o I really nee/) the one the imp took.
TA: kill that bastard quickly

You determine your progress to be roughly around zero percent, now that you're back to dealing with a server player who allowed someone else to have his computer.

===>

Roughly seven minutes in the future, you get an alert on the terminal on one of the security feeds.

>Examine

The blast appeared to have knocked this camera so it faced upwards, you can only really tell that because of the single corner of sky that's not blocked out by the giant meteor. This takes a moment for you to process longer over all of the noise of the meteor impacts, partially because a couple of those sounded very . . . metallic.

>Be someone who is not in dire danger