It Lives!!!!

[Dauntasa]

[G.I.R.]

[Savage Thinking]

It's how real men put on pants.

[Regulus Tera]

Internet: stop asking for having your favourite games be called shit on. You just won't win.

You are all made of stupid.

[POS Industries]

Originally Posted by Regulus Tera

Internet: stop asking for having your favourite games be called shit on. You just won't win.

You are all made of stupid.

You know, at least when X-Play does that bit there's a pair of tits in it. Just sayin'.

[Regulus Tera]

There were dicks. He probably was catering to the opposite sex.

[POS Industries]

From Jhonen Vasquez's Twitter page:
[TLDR]05:50 PM April 24, 2008:
Jumped up for no apparent reason. Have not returned to the ground yet.

09:49 PM April 24, 2008:
still up in the air. I think I'm doing this completely wrong

02:04 AM April 25, 2008:
Definitely some part of the whole procedure has gone a bit off, compared to how they made it look in the magazines.

05:34 PM April 25, 2008:
How can someone be bad at their own Y-axis? Starting to get a bit worried...and hungry. Maybe I can lure a bird into my mouth.

11:40 PM April 25, 2008:
Actually punched a passing sparrow. Killed it, but it fell to the ground before I could eat it. Cat ate it.

04:38 AM April 26, 2008:
Progress! Started descending, very slowly, a few minutes back. Seem to have leveled out at four feet from the ground.

06:58 PM April 26, 2008:
No closer to the ground, but now starting to spin very slowly. Some little dog keeps snapping at my feet like the raptor in Jurassic Park.

05:52 AM April 27, 2008:
Dog hanging from my bleeding foot, dead. I'll explain later. I really have to think about this.

11:59 PM April 27, 2008:
Starving again. Dog on foot making my stomach grumble. Four meals away from anarchy, they say. I won't give in. I'm better than this.

03:40 AM April 28, 2008:
Clumps of fur stuck to tacky, blood smeared hands. I hover over the skeletal, black angus trash bin remains of the dog. What have I become?

01:48 AM April 29, 2008:
Blacked out for a few hours. No idea where I am now. Hovering over an empty grocery store parking lot in the middle of the night.

07:45 AM April 29, 2008:
Morning shoppers pushing carts, not helping. I see a windsock puppet-man flopping at the gas station across the street and sympathize.

07:50 AM April 29, 2008:
A little girl just pointed at me and told her mom I'm a funny looking balloon. I look nothing like a balloon. The kid's an idiot.

01:43 PM April 29, 2008:
A lady making bacon-wieners refused to throw one up at me, no matter how much I asked. I was asking at the top of my lungs, but still.

10:10 AM April 30, 2008:
If I had some very tall soled shoes, say, four feet high, people might stop staring at me as much.

03:09 PM April 30, 2008:
Homeless man keeps asking "Whachoo doin up there?" No matter how many times I answer, he collapses with phlegmy, hobo laughter.

02:03 AM May 01, 2008:
Plenty of thinking time when you're jump is busted. Gonna distribute some of the computing. Megacolon. Look it up.

02:35 AM May 01, 2008:
Solace in thinking this is just a stupid dream has been shattered, along with my legs, by a speeding Humvee.

08:37 AM May 01, 2008:
It's not until they're hanging lifelessly by ragged gristle that slowly snaps like a kneaded eraser that ya start to appreciate your legs.

11:04 AM May 01, 2008:
Blacked out from blood loss. I can see one of my legs drifting off into the sky. Dunno where the other is. Gotta say, I'm a bit freaked.

09:50 AM May 02, 2008:
Floating around with ragged flesh like ripped dishtowels hanging from my hip sockets reminds me there hasn't been a cool DOOM game in years.

07:00 PM May 02, 2008:
Wrapped some trash bags around my waist and let them drape to the floor. Now I look more normal. Normal, smeared in gore, and 8 feet tall.

08:28 PM May 02, 2008:
Some little bastard ran under my trash bags, hiding under there to make his friends laugh. That was an hour ago. He never came out.

12:08 PM May 03, 2008:
Kid's friends insulting me, waiting for him to come back out. Wind kicked the bags up, revealing a bleached skeleton underneath. They ran.

02:19 PM May 03, 2008:
Can someone drive by, throw me a rope and tow me someplace away from this skeleton? People must think I shit Harryhausen villains.

09:14 PM May 03, 2008:
I realize now that if I do finally land, it'll be directly on the gaping hollows of my hip holes, jamming my pelvis up under my ribcage.

02:52 AM May 04, 2008:
3A.M. Drifted off into a lonely intersection. No cars all night. Sleeping pigeons silhouetted, nested in streetlight covers. Good night.

12:59 PM May 04, 2008:
Dropped a three feet all in one go! I was eating a sandwich some homeless lady gave me when it happened and almost choked to death.

01:13 PM May 04, 2008:
Dropped even more. Don't know if the sandwich is the key, but now I'm just compressing into the pavement under some freak gravity.

04:35 PM May 04, 2008:
There's a man from the gas company in my house, screaming something about a gas leak and and neighbors angry about lost pets. Confused.

06:22 PM May 04, 2008:
Seems I've been half mad breathing gas and eating pets. My legs are fine. Only M. Night Shyamalam could rival a shitty ending like this.

01:00 AM May 05, 2008:
Probably shouldn't complain, but seems people should be harder to buy off when you've eaten their pets than simply giving them a canned ham.

10:37 AM May 05, 2008:
My first day out since the gas induced hallucinations, and I've gotta say I'm a bit down on how no universal laws are being broken.[/TLDR]

[Kim]

For those of you who haven't seen how awesome this show is: HERE!

"They called themselves Team Thirteen:Thirtyseven"

[Rygar]

Originally Posted by Regulus Tera

Internet: stop asking for having your favourite games be called shit on. You just won't win.

You are all made of stupid.

Guess what.

The first letter on there (from "Jeremy Gigaballs" or something) was actually from a friend of mine IRL. The funniest thing is we live in Britain, so he's never actually played Brawl.

The original, unabridged, version of his email:

Originally Posted by Jeremy Gigaballs

F*** you. SSBB is awesome. Just because your are too blinded by the shiny vomit distributed for the PS3 to see that, doesn't mean that should try to convince others that SSMB is bad. The hours of single player mode to unlock extras is part of SSB. Its f****** tradition. I'm pretty sure that the other reason you dont like SSBB is that you were crap at it. Its true isnt it? You got your shiny vomit covered ass handed to you by Yoshi. And dont try to blame it on bad contols or opponents having super moves that strike you out in one hit. Its because it took you five hours to figure out up was jump and A was attack. Now whos the twat?

Not a whole lot of extra content, but still.

[Meister]

Not to derail the yootoobs thread but was he serious or trying to emulate whining Nintendo fanboys?

If it's the former: Mario having a finite number of lives is tradition and it doesn't make the mechanic any less clunky these days.