The Marvelous Misadventures of Asshat! [REBOOT]

[DarkDrgon]

Wallace must be in your final lineup. You have no choice in the matter, he is far too FABULOUS to sit in a box.

[Token]

Originally Posted by Fusionman

This is this best way to start a sequel LP ever. However 1 stipulation. I want a Pokemon or 2 named after Mass Effect characters. Preferably after Saren, Fist or the Reapers.

I never really liked Mass Effect, but I guess I can do that.

Originally Posted by DarkDrgon

Wallace must be in your final lineup. You have no choice in the matter, he is far too FABULOUS to sit in a box.

Wallace is in.


Due to sudden medical issues, I won't be going to school for a while. As a result, I have nothing better to do than to work on this. So, because I'm an ass, I'll stop accepting team suggestions at midnight my time (so in 13 hours), so I can try to wrap this motherfucker up.

[Locke cole]

I suggest Kittan, because Beedrill are too cool to sit in boxes.

[Lost in Time]

I'm voting for Kanye to stay in the party! He's one cool mofo.

[Token]

Based on suggestions and the League itself, the final team will be as follows:
Leafyhed: Come on. He's the starter. Do I really have a choice?
Wallace: Not only is he an amazingly fabulous motherfucker, his moveset will come in handy. Psychic will ruin Bruno. Thunder Punch and Ice Punch will be helpful against Lance. Hypnosis is Hypnosis. Also, he's fabulous. That needs to be reiterated.
Deckard: Same logic as Wallace, his movepool is good. Fire Punch, Thunder Punch, Dynamic Punch, and Iron Tail. He could conceivably hold his own against each of the Elite Four.
Kanye: The Tank, and the Ruiner of Days. He can heal himself and still pull out Icy Wind and Earthquake. Odds are, by the time I get to Lance, he'll have Blizzard instead of Icy Wind. (also LiT's pun was fantastic so he's in forever.)
Skittles: Wallace's BRO 4 LYF, and Asshat's RageBuddy. Once again, not much choice. I'm a little apprehensive about bringing him in though; his learnpool isn't nearly as good as it is in later generations.
Sayrune: Poliwhirl has always been one of my personal favorites. Sayrune has Hypnosis and Ice Punch, so even if Wallace goes down, I still have a shot of winning.

As for the three main players who didn't get in, it's mostly because I couldn't think of reasons to use them. Stabeak is powerful, and she's served well before, but Flying type is a liability when Lance has an Aerodactyl, and Bruno has a couple of Rocks. As for Pohatu, he doesn't bring the might or type coverage that Kanye can. As for Kittan, I'm saving that motherfucker for Red. Next episode should be up shortly.

[Fusionman]

If you hate Mass Effect you don't have to Token. Also HOORAY WALLACE AND SKITTLES!!! Can we please evolve Leafyhed soon though?

[Flarecobra]

I say don't evolve him, it'd just add to the emberassment factor of getting beat by Leafyhed.

[The Argent Lord]

I know voting's over, but I'm contractually obligated to request that you use Argent at some point.

[Token]

I dislike editing images. On a mostly unrelated note, homework and play permitting, episode 14 should be up today or tomorrow. Episode 15 will be up this weekend, and if the epilogue doesn't come that same day, it'll be a day or two after.

EDIT: Finished. Now it all just has to go up. I've got about an hour before play rehearsal right now, so I'll try and get part 14 up. Then it's a three day weekend, so I should have this concluded by Monday.

[Token]

Skarmory in general are pretty rad. This one is the best in the universe.

Now let's see whatever useless shit Elm has to say.

You learned that Pokemon hatch from eggs. Everyone has always known this, forever.

Is it another Everstone? Can't I just get something useful this time? Somethin' like, I dunno, a-

Dammit Elm, I said something useful! This might have been helpful before I decided to catch a god. Which, incidentally, is in a basic fucking Pokeball. So yeah.

That's what Silph says, anyway.

Not a horrible motto, come to think of it.

Yeah, Elm. Everyone knows that.

So I guess it'd go for a lot on eBay?

Yes. It will bring me the mad pokebucks.

Right, time to head to the League. Fuck yeah.

Yes?

No, but I'm sure you'll tell me. Most likely in an incredibly stupid manner, as befitting your average Johtonian.

What?

I swear to Arceus himself, if you are lying, I will rip your testicles off and shove them in your eyesockets.


YESSSSSSSS

And then I got the fuck out of dodgeJohto.

Sorry about that. I just got a little overexcited by the whole "entire cave between me and Johto" thing...

Sure, why not.

I better keep up my guard. Odds are, Kanto trainers are a lot tougher...

Or not.... I guess that's just as well...

The-

yes.

I-

Stop cutting me-

I'm glad to he-

It's nice to be able to finish a sente-

Thank y-

Doo-doo-do-

Okay, no one interrupts the Item Get Sequence but me. I'm about to send out Deckard and have him use Fire Punch to burn your house down.

And then her house burned down. Shame she couldn't move so she could get out. Thunder Wave can do that to a person.

Kay.

That was boring. You're boring.

Yes. Yes I am.

All you've said to me is a question, but I can tell from your name that you suck.

Your name also tells me that you have a frozen Sandslash.

Don't be silly. If you're on Victory Road, and all you have is a Sandslash, either you are very bad at Nuzlocke runs, or you're just a very sucky trainer. People like you don't think.

I hope that everyone you've ever loved is eaten by a Garchomp.

You're a dumbass. Also, I don't like you, and I wish you nothing but misfortune.

Just looking at you makes me pro-choice.

You are a horrible psychic.

I mean, damn.

Also, Wallace is better than you in every possible way.

I'm Mister Hate Miser, you're fucking dumb.

I'm Mister Awesome Trainer

Case in point, I've already won.

Friends call me Hate Miser, whatever I say

It just ruins your day! I'm too much!

I am going to ruin that so quickly.

If you could lift your boot off the ground, you morbidly obese pile of Snorlax droppings.

And then all of your Pokemon fainted.

Exactly like that.

That's what happens when you have the audacity to feel good, you chubby little fuck.

I got mah bling out, yes.

No, that's pretty much enough for me, really.

I have never met a Psychic that is any good at anything.

That's what the ladies tell me.

Oh? This should be interesting.

Sadly, "all she's got" is an insane skill at losing.

That doesn't explain my strength at all.

You're using a Flareon. By default, that means you aren't allowed to ever raise children.

Well, la-dee-da, aren't you Mr. Tough-Shit?

I really hope your "final preparations" involve catching Pokemon that don't suck.

Holy crap, I think I've found an actual Psychic!

Oh. You meant that other asshole.

You're only saying that because you lost. Also, yes they are, according to history. Or did you forget when Isshu sent Victini in to decimate Orre?

Oh really. Check 'em.

Damn straight.

Fuckin' caves. Hate them so much.

But they have some damn good loot.

Oh for fuck's sake.

No, I'm trying to find the entrance to the goddamn Mushroom Kingdom.

But I'm funny. It's what I do.

Bitch, what?

I'm still the same, in that I. Don't. Care.

That's not true. Your Pokemon suck, and you are going to lose, as always.

You still don't warrant Boss Subtitles, but whatever.

And not a single fuck was given that day.

How the fuck have you even caught a Sneasel what the hell.

Fuckin' Magneton, how do they work?

I ain't scared of no ghosts.

I'll just drive you bats.

Avada Kadabra. Or something. Not all of my jokes have to be amazing.

Also, your Typhlosion is inherently worse than my Chikorita. Why? Because it was raised by your sorry ass.

Observant.

That's pretty sad.

Are you referring to my skill, or the fact that I have a penis that's larger than three inches?

About lubing up properly before you bend over and get my foot up your ass?

I suppose it's nice to have dreams, even if they never will come true.

Because you're a bitch. We've been over this, numerous times.

Am I supposed to care?

The funniest thing is that you're serious.

Will do, skipper. Now get out of my way, I have a Championship to take.

And here it is...

But first...

Well, first, healing. But even firster....

Mo'fuckin POWERLEVELing all up in this bitch.

Allons-y!

NEXT TIME: Can you say "anti-climax?"