I feel a bit down today

[Adghar]

Okay, I decided this rant was too offensive and not funny to stay up, but the earlier link stays.

[Yakubyougami]

I think you passed a toe or two across the line, but no worries.

[Nique]

Oh... oh my. Yakubyougami... that's ah... Well, a candy commercial. Yikes.

[MrJoykill]

Originally Posted by TheSpacePope

I less than three you guys
i am lauging the old ass off

you all will be spared when the rapture comes
or the raptors, i can't remember.

hey have you heard the current news?

Chuck Norris was captured by terrorist from the future, they wanted to kill him cause he was the key that would lead the new revolution. So they pushed him in to a pit full of raptors. He then came out with a new pair of reptile boots and roundhouse kicked all the terrorist so hard that they were sent 3 centuries later!

[Fifthfiend]

Originally Posted by TheSpacePope

Okay, I know this may be unorthadox, but quite a few of you are funny so....
I have just felt shitty the last couple of days, and it seems that the forumites funnyness (yes i made the spelling up) is one of the only things that is keeping me good. My girlfriend told me she needed some time apart, and I am having trouble dealing with this, not that anyone cares about that, but I thought we could all have a game here
So everyone submit a part of a funny story, each forumer keeps it going till we are just riddled with laughter. there is no contest rules, nothing special for the winner, cept' you get to make the space pope smile, and we all know how much Zod likes that. (plus the million in space bucks.)




so if this is out of line just close the post, but if anyone feels like taking some time to cheer me up, the efforts won,t be forgotten.

There's a story my friend used to tell that always cheered me up.

It was the Story of Why Jesse Stopped Drinking Jack Daniels.

So my friend -

- Jesse-

- is at this party, right?

Drinking Jack Daniels.

(Jesse is this scarecrow-looking motherfucker, like what you'd get if Steve Buscemi had been raped by George Carlin.)

So anyway

He'd got himself like a whole bottle of Jack Daniels.

Like a fifth, whatever the standard size is.

And he's having himself a good old time.

You know good people, good music, good whatever.

So he's having such a good time he has like half of this bottle.

And you know he goes on having a good time.

So then the next thing he knows...

He's in a field.

Just lying face down in this big muddy ass open field.

So he lifts his head up and looks around and he's like

"So what the fuck am I doing in the middle of a field?"

But then after that he's like "Hey, there's three dudes coming over here."

And he was like "Hey, those are some big, mean lookin' dudes."

And then he was like "Hey, those guys look like they want to beat the shit out of me."

And then

They do!

They come right up to him and commence to absolutely beating the shit out of him!

And then, completing the task at hand to their satisfaction, they just walk away, and leave Jesse clutching himself in pain and wondering how the fuck he's going to get out of this field.

And that's the story of why Jesse stopped drinking Jack Daniels.

Of course when he finished the story, he'd always turn to whoever had the bottle of Jack Daniels which prompted the story -

And be like "don't want to drink that bottle of Jack Daniels so much any more do you?"

And then the person would be all like yeah.

So then Jesse'd be like "So how about you gimmie that goddamn bottle of Jack Daniels!"

And when the person was all hey I thought you didn't drink Jack Daniels any more

he'd be like "Well yeah jackass, I left my bottle in a damn field! But now I've got yours so I can drink Jack Daniels again!"

[MrJoykill]

I knew a man of the name of Jack Daniels...
Ironicly he died of alchohol poisoning the next day

oh and "rawk" is a better improvement from your other quote,"WOO! GENETELIA!"

oh and dude that is sad... are you happy yet?

[Fifthfiend]

Originally Posted by MrJoykill

oh and "rawk" is a better improvement from your other quote,"WOO! GENETELIA!"

Really it's just a short reprieve while I come up with something even more offensive.

[Adghar]

Originally Posted by Yakubyougami

I think you passed a toe or two across the line, but no worries.

Speaking of funny NSFW (this one's a bit iffy) content, Yakubyougami, for some reason your SN reminds me of this.

[The Wizard Who Did It]

Originally Posted by fifthfiend

Really it's just a short reprieve while I come up with something even more offensive.

So, is this law of you getting increasingly offensive titles now coined by me?

On another note, I liked your 'woo titties' line. BRING IT BACK.

[POS Industries]

Originally Posted by The Wizard Who Did It

So, is this law of you getting increasingly offensive titles now coined by me?

On another note, I liked your 'woo titties' line. BRING IT BACK.

I did too.... maybe I'll steal it for a bit, since it always made me giggle.