OH NOES NOT ANOTHER ONE! Let's Play Pokemon EMERALD

[Ecks]

OKAY! I'VE GOT SOME GOOD NEWS AND SOME BAD NEWS.

BAD NEWS FIRST! I won't have the update ready tonight. Might not have it ready for tomorrow, either.

GOOD NEWS! CARTOONIST IS ALIVE! And he's got some sprites for me! In fact, go back through the first couple of updates and check out Kentucky's new look.

Don't have the time or patience to go in and edit ALL of the goddamn image tags tonight, so I'll leave it to just those updates for now. I will go in and edit chapter 3 parts I and II and Aryll's character profile tomorrow night... maybe. And now that I have Cartoonists sprites available and up on photobucket, I can now insert the image tags for Chapter 4, and I will have THAT up at some point, followed by maybe a character profile.

Tall order, not a lot of time this weekend to do it... but I have a strategy going. I don't believe in myself, though, nope. I BELIEVE IN YOU WHO BELIEVES IN ME!

[Daimo Mac, The Blue Light of Hope]

*quietly waits for Ecks update*

[Ecks]

Okay guys. First things first. We've got to start adding to our team.

Okay, boss.

Then lead on, Ecks!



I will come back here... soon. I'm gonna beat you. And when I do...

& Ecks?

Let's get moving.



What.



What do you want?



Boy, nothing gets past you.




Well excuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuse me, Slim Shady. I happen to pride myself on the way I dress. Douche.



Well, okay, I guess you could call me a Rookie. But I sure as hell ain't ordinary. How many white haired kids have YOU ever seen?



Then look no further. Not only am I talented, but I have Pokemon capable of communicating with people... or just me, I might just be a weirdness magnet, or something.



Damn right you are. I'm on a pest of versional quencheance. Er, quest of personal vengeance. Right. Nice meeting you, Shady.



Should we tell him the guy just dismissed him as unremarkable?

After all that daddy-issue rage he let off a few minutes ago? Leave him be, I'd rather not get him roaring again.



Anyway, I've spent far longer than I wanted to in this dunghill, let's FINALLY get under way.



Route 104. This splits into a water route that goes south, which we will not be taking because I don't own a boat nor a surfing Pokemon, and a path through Petalburg Woods that will lead north... and eventually reach Rustboro.




Handy information, to be sure. I already knew it, but he's not totally useless.



Le gasp! Eet eez une female!

Oh, boy...



That's too bad. By which I mean totally rad. Already better than my ex.

Who was never your girlfriend in the first place.

Sure, in the sense I'm talking about. However, she IS a girl, and she THINKS
she's my friend.

That's just getting off on a technicality.

Huh huh huh huh.... hahahahahaha.... hahahahaha!

You walked into that one.

He... he said "getting off."

:|

GACK! OH GOD PLEASE NO!

Gonna stop?

Ugh... yeah, sure I'm done.



Yeah, I kinda figured that out on my own. Where were you before Route 103?



Seriously, I could've gotten your phone number or something.

ECKS.

Okay, sheesh. At least I'm not all over her... yet.

>:\

FUCK, MY BRAIN! IT HURTS!

Will he ever learn?

I doubt it.



Oh look, it's a kid walking around in circles.



Shit, he's a trainer.



I'll take your word for it.



Good for you, Billy. Now where are Mandy and Grim?

Oh, you.





Taken down from the word go.



Yay!



A Seedot, eh?



Nah, Aryll can handle it.





Told ya.




So go back up to the grass, and beat it off...



Hurr, I told him to beat off.

Dude. You're like, bipolar or something.

How so?

You were in a fit of homicidal rage not a half hour ago and now you're making lame double entendres and laughing about them to yourself.

So?

Forget it.




So get it wet first.

DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT FINISHING THAT THOUGHT.

DAMMIT ARYLL, WHAT HAVE I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOING IN THERE WITHOUT PERMISSION?

Look, I can deal with the fact that you're a miserable lech, even a pervert, but seriously. You have no idea how much control it takes to ignore even surface thoughts. And when you're making up dirty jokes, those thoughts are brought up to the surface.

Okay, sheesh. I'll try to be a little more considerate of the fact that you're not in total control of your mind reading.

That's all I ask.



Two dudes by the sea. They fishing, or what? Guess I'll ask.



Yeah. It's right here in front of you.



Book a charter on a submarine or something. If they do that in Hoenn.



That's cool dude. I'm gonna go away now.



Wait... "magical quality?" Fuck, if this is what I think it is...




AH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! HAH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

OH NO! I'M SO SCARED! IT LOOKS SO TOUGH I MIGHT WET MYSELF! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

That thing is about as intimidating as a flip-flop.








Don't act so surprised. It's a Magikarp, man.




No, but keep at it. It will become a fuck-awesome sea serpent in about eleven levels. By which point we will be far away from here, and beyond the reach of his vengeance.



Hey, cool, a boat. I bet it belongs to the guy who lives in this house. But as I said before, our road lies northward... but before I move on, I'm thinking Aryll and Ken need a rest.

Huh, hold on, what's that behind-



Me. A Marill, huh? Could be useful...




Okay Aryll, don't hurt him too much. We need him conscious.

I'll do my best!





Okay, that's enough.



Time to use a Poke Ball.





Excuse me, WHAT?

You will not take me that easily, human!



UGH!

Aryll!



You'd better stay in this time. God help you if I run out of Poke Balls... Or you'll be at my mercy.





Sounds DEAD useful. Gonna keep it.



You have earned my allegiance human. I fought hard, and was bested. I am yours to command.

Wow. Maybe I AM a weirdness magnet. Every Pokemon I capture is capable of human speech. Or maybe I'm just capable of understanding what they say...

I am not entirely sure what you mean by that, sir. Though you are the first human I've encountered who is capable of comprehending the speech of Pokemon.

Huh... your speech pattern reminds me of someone...



Worf. That sounds like the name of a proud warrior. I am honored to carry it, sir.

Look, we're not really all that formal around here... but if saying "sir" is your thing... well, carry on.

Understood, sir.

Welcome to the team.

...

I apologize. I have injured your female companion.

My name is Aryll.

A pleasure to meet you.

Don't worry about me. Occupational hazard.

I don't doubt it. Though I must give you credit, Aryll, I've never seen a female take a hit like that before.

I'll take that as a compliment.

And what is your name, Torchic?

Kentucky. Ken for short.

I take it that name is a reference to your species' similarity to captive poultry?

Yeah. Just... just go ahead and call me Ken.

Very well, Ken.

Okay, now that we're all acquainted...



Let's continue on, shall we?



Oh look, a meaningful name. How convenient.



Sounds like a badass.





Cool, some more berries I'll likely never use.



Oh my! A feminine form doth walk towards me!



And with a sense of romance! I like you already!



Now that I get a closer look at you, I find myself enraptured by your beauty!



ENRAPTURED, I SAY!



Okay, Ecks, we get it already.

Pardon me, Commander, but... what is the Captain doing?

Huh? "Commander?" Well... I'm not so sure if... aw, what the hell. Worf, the Captain has an eye for attractive human females and tends to lose focus on what he's doing if there is one around.

Understood, sir.

So... you're going to play along with it?

Well, we deal with your quirks, and presumably, you and 'the Captain' deal with mine. Why not?

How is it you are able to converse with the Councilor in private like that?

Telepathy, Worf.

I am not certain that I understand.

She is capable of reading the minds of others, and speaking to them directly in their thoughts. With a little practice, it's possible to just think your responses to her, and have a completely private conversation.

I am not comfortable with this. We Marill pride ourselves on being forward, and up-front about our intentions. This power over the mind the Councilor possesses violates the Marill code of honor.

To be fair, Worf, Aryll and I aren't Marill.

Perhaps we might come to a compromise? If I can get it right, I may be able to speak into everyone's mind at once, eliminating the privacy issue.

I will try to relax some of the more trivial Marill tenants. As the Captain took me into his cadre, I am now your comrade. The word comrade means something a bit more than to humans, however. In Marill upbringing, your comrades are your family, brothers and sisters, in all but blood. This is why I initially felt discomfort with the Councilor's... with Aryll's way of speaking. I forgot myself and thought of the both of you as Marill also.

Hey guys?

Yes?

I'm done oggling the pretty girl now.



Oh boy, another one of these.




Fight honorably, foe.




You seek to intimidate me? Clearly, you have never fought a Marill.




Well done, Worf.

Thank you, Captain.



Worf, use Tackle.

Aye, sir.




That was pitiful. Let me show you how it is done.




To fall in battle to me is no disgrace.




Still so lovely even in defeat. Oh my, indeed!



HOLY SHIT SHE'S LOADED.

Sir? Fighting for money is not honorable.

We're not mercenaries, Worf. That is the rule of battle between humans. The loser pays out a prize to the victor. It's how we earn a living. The, er, honor is in the challenge.

I see. I can accept that, Captain. My apologies.

For what?

Questioning a superior officer.

There's nothing to apologize for, Worf. You had an issue, and you voiced it. If Ken and Aryll didn't voice, or violently assault my mind with, their problems, we'd never get anything done.

What a strange group I have found myself in.

It's bound to get even stranger.



As do I, miss. As do I.



Okay, lady and gentlemen. We're going in.



Kinda dark.




Excellent idea.



Cool.

[Ecks]

Before we go any further north, let's see what we couldn't get at before.




That kind of goes without saying. I'm not even sure you CAN throw a Poke Ball at someone else's Pokemon. Though there was that one guy on the news... from Orre. He was some kind of modern Robin Hood, stealing Pokemon from bad trainers or something like that.



And what do we have here?



See, THIS is what I expect when I pick up one of those item balls. Now, back to Petalburg Woods.



This isn't going where I think it is, is it?



Of course it is.




Lyle? Your parents must hate you.



A Wurmple? Worf, dispose of it.



As ordered, sir.





Worf, Tackle.

Aye, sir.




And another one down.






Again, Worf.

With pleasure, sir.





And another one down.





You know the drill, Worf.



And another one bites the dust!





Damn, Worf, you're a bruiser.

I take great pride in my fighting prowess.



Okay, let's keep moving.



Who's this guy?



Well, yeah, they're all over the place. Look harder.



Eww, maybe I shouldn't have told you that...



Whoa, who's this guy.

That is a bad man. A bad, bad, BAD, BAD BAD BAD BAD MAN.

Calm down, Aryll.




He said something about ambushing.

I will second the Councilor's assessment. Ambush tactics are for weaklings who lack significant strength to take an opponent head on.





Something tells me I'm gonna have to save this loser.



Must civilians always be cowards?



Well, I'm not really gonna get a choice. I'm gonna make peace with the fact that this is happening, and just deal with it.



Well, I don't really want to, but seeing as he's cowering behind me...



Excuse me? Did... did you just use a stock villain phrase? OH, IT'S FUCKING ON NOW, DUDE.





STOP RIGHT THERE, CRIMINAL SCUM!




Worf, Tail Whip.

Aye-aye, sir!






Sand-Attack? Oh boy, lemme guess, he's gonna spam that until Worf is blind, and then whale on him with impunity?




Didn't even take one turn to start affecting him.

This is merely a temporary setback, sir. I will defeat him.




As ordered. Sir.



Not bad for a kid, huh? Punk-ass motherfucker.




Let me take your money, then get the hell out of here.




That would sound so much more menacing if you had actually posed a threat to me.



That's right.



Wow, no wonder you're a grunt. Blabbing your gang's plans to a suit and a kid with superpowered animals.



You'll let me go? As opposed to what?



Yeah, maybe for you. Coward.



Important... papers?




Well... gee, thanks.






Bye.



Jeez, how far do these woods go?



Oops.



A Slakoth, eh? Doesn't sound particularly useful... but I DO want someone a little more laid back around here. Between Punk Pyrotechnic, Clingy Telepath, and Proud Warrior Race Guy, it's far too serious AND far too silly. I need a middle ground.



Worf, this is a potential comrade. I need you to weaken him for capture.

As you wish, sir.



That's enough. Keep your guard up while I toss a Poke Ball.

Aye, sir.







Just as I thought... Exactly What It Says On The Tin. Still, I got what I wanted out of this.




Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...

He seems rather... lazy.

That's fine with me. I can empathize, as a lazy guy myself.



Okay, time to move on.



Yeah, they're in pretty good shape.




Yeah, that's kind of obvious. To most people familiar with the concept of "tall grass = random battles."



Judging by his hat, this kid is a Bug Catcher. Who will have nothing but the same Pokemon repeated several times in his team.



Yeah, because there's nothing, in a world FULL of fuck-awesome Pokemon, cooler than BUG POKEMON.




Well, I guess we could give Mac a try.

Huh? Wuzzat? I'm a little out of it could you YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWN-




-repeat that?



Ow... Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...

Hey, Mac. Snap out of it. I need you to use Scratch.



Hey, I don't get it. Is he disobeying me?

...zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz- Huh? Oh... uh, no... I'm just really lazy... and sorta-maybe-a-little narcoleptic.

Oh.



Ow...




The... good thing is... it's apparently contagious...



I'm gonna... go ahead... and use Scratch now...



Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...



Huh. Well, so long as Nincada stays asleep-



Dammit.




Double dammit.

Sorry man... s'hard to keep up... when I'm so sleepy...

Don't feel bad, Mac. I like how you handle adversity. But this dude's used Harden and it'll take forever if I just have you Scratch every turn you're able...






Leiutenant Worf, reporting for duty.



Worf, use Water Gun.

Aye, sir.





Awaiting orders, Captain.

Stand by.




Do it again, Worf.

Yes, Captain.




Now follow it up with Tackle.

As you wish, sir.





I don't think you can ever be popular.




Okay, yeah, sure, if you've got something like a Scizor or a Forretress... but your Nincada don't count. Evolve one of them, or something... Ninjask and Shedinja both qualify.



What do we have here?



Ethers are rare, rare items. You cannot buy them in stores, and there is no other way to find them. Except maybe a Pokemon that knows Pickup at a high level.

How do you KNOW these things?

Internet.



And these are those skinny trees I was talking about back in OnracLittleroot Town.

And it shames me to say it... but I can't cut them down. Seriously, what is wrong with me?

Nothing. Whoever made this world is an asshole.



Let's get out of here.



Ugh, I'm a little tired. Think we'll take a break here.

---

And that wraps up this update. I'll be doing Worf's character profile in the next update, Mac's following the Rustboro update.

SURPRISE! Worf snuck up on me. It was a very spur of the moment thing. I weighed my options and decided I absofuckinglutely NEEDED Rollout. I was watching a Star Trek: TNG marathon last Tuesday and that got TNG stuck in my head... And thus I named Marill Worf and copy-pasted improvised dialogue for him. Yeah, I'm not sure where I'm going with him referring to everyone by imaginary ranks, but it just feels weird to write dialogue for a character named Worf and NOT have him refer to everyone by rank, and talk about honor and interspecies etiquette.

Mac was planned though. I dunno why, but I kept missing screens right around the time I caught him and started using him. For starters, I've been trying to do that thing Cartoonist does where he shows one screen at the Pokemon Center, which tells you all you really need to know about what he did, without any explanation. I forgot to do that shortly after catching Mac. I also forgot to screencap the part where I put him in front of the party. I forgot several screens during the battle with James, mostly the "Bug Catcher James would like to battle!" part. The part where I sent out Mac, etc. Dunno what my problem is, but I'm too lazy to go back and fix it. The dialogue somewhat glosses over this, but I'm not gonna rely on that to put it out of your minds. I'll do better next time, I swear.

I have room for two more permanent party members. At this point, I've got a Fire-type (which will eventually dual-type in Fighting), a Water-type, a Psychic-type, and a Normal-type. What should I grab to round this out? I'm figuring on a Trapinch at some point, but that's damn near halfway through the game. It'll be months before I even reach Mauville City. I may cave in and carry an Aron, because I've never had an Aggron before, and I want to see how it plays to decide whether or not I want to put one together for HG. Any advice on what to pick would be appreciated.

[Daimo Mac, The Blue Light of Hope]

I'd make a post telling you how great this update was but I...zzzzzzzzZZZZZZzzzzzzz

[mauve]

You're so much kinder in regards to naming your Pokemon than I am. I woulda named the Marill Vermin, especially since he seems too dedicated to Ecks to protest it. I also woulda named the Zigzagoon Rabies.


But then, I named my Stantler after a hunting rifle, my Togepi after an egg-based breakfast food, and my Arbok after a company that makes shoes and purses. I'm a good Pokemon trainer.

I'm enjoying this LP so far.

[Daimo Mac, The Blue Light of Hope]

Originally Posted by Mauve Mage

You're so much kinder in regards to naming your Pokemon than I am. I woulda named the Marill Vermin, especially since he seems too dedicated to Ecks to protest it. I also woulda named the Zigzagoon Rabies.


But then, I named my Stantler after a hunting rifle, my Togepi after an egg-based breakfast food, and my Arbok after a company that makes shoes and purses. I'm a good Pokemon trainer.

I'm enjoying this LP so far.

ZzzzzzZZZzzz...and that's...zzzzzZZzzZZZZzzzz...why your...zzzzzzZZZZZzzzzz...pokemon...zzzzzZZZZZzzzz z...don't like you...zzzZZzzzZZZZZZZZ

[Bard The 5th LW]

Originally Posted by Mauve Mage

You're so much kinder in regards to naming your Pokemon than I am. I woulda named the Marill Vermin, especially since he seems too dedicated to Ecks to protest it. I also woulda named the Zigzagoon Rabies.


But then, I named my Stantler after a hunting rifle, my Togepi after an egg-based breakfast food, and my Arbok after a company that makes shoes and purses. I'm a good Pokemon trainer.

I'm enjoying this LP so far.

I'm going to have to follow in these footsteps, my nicknames aren't really that good.

Seriously, the most 'clever' nickname I can recall was naming a Muk BP. Ain't quite comedy gold.

[Daimo Mac, The Blue Light of Hope]

Well, I did do some different names, but the two I am most proud of are.

Chimchar ~ Sun Wukong (so bleedin appropriate)
Gyarados' ~ Shin Ryu and Shen Long

[greed]

Man I got a Tauros and Miltank named Angus and Wagyu.

Originally Posted by EckScizor

I have room for two more permanent party members. At this point, I've got a Fire-type (which will eventually dual-type in Fighting), a Water-type, a Psychic-type, and a Normal-type. What should I grab to round this out? I'm figuring on a Trapinch at some point, but that's damn near halfway through the game. It'll be months before I even reach Mauville City. I may cave in and carry an Aron, because I've never had an Aggron before, and I want to see how it plays to decide whether or not I want to put one together for HG. Any advice on what to pick would be appreciated.

They play defensively, Aggron's have got ridiculous defense (terrible spec def though) and a decent attack stat. Have to watch the hell out for electricity though, it's terrible spec def and 4x weakness means thundershocks will kill it.

And you could always throw in a gameshark to get something early (a Trapinch would be cool, as would one of the ghost pokemon from Mt Pyre). Could grab some Pokemon you like from the earlier Gens. Say it escaped from a zoo, or it's trainer got eaten by a Gyarados or quit training and eloped with a Gardevoir.