Clash of the Titans is kind of sucky

BitVyper · 04-04-2010, 09:16 PM

Just incase you were going to go in the hopes of it being spectacularly bad, I wouldn't bother. It's pretty clear that no one involved with the film particularly cared about it. The guy who plays Zeus seems like he might have actually been trying, and that's about all I can say in the movie's favour. Beyond that though, the acting ranges from mediocre to terrible. The guy playing Hades feels like he's trying to be a cross between Grima Wormtongue and Sauron, but he fails miserably. The fact that noone even seems to care that they're ancient Greeks makes them seem more like LARPers than the characters they're portraying.

The writing is mostly bad. Perseus can't seem to get who he really truly hates with the fire of a thousand suns straight. The vague romance is just sorta tacked on like they realised they needed one at the last second. The plot is largely changed into something that doesn't make a lot of sense("we are defying the gods because.... um... Grrr! We are defying the gods!?"), and none of the characters are particularly memorable.

The visuals are mostly mediocre with a side of bad. The Medusa especially was disappointing, partly due to this, and partly due to poor direction. Keeping her out of sight most of the time could have invoked subtle horror if it had been done right. Here it's just like they used it as an excuse to not bother putting too much work into her. I would bet that if you took away all the shadows in that scene, she'd look like something off a PS2. Now the giant scorpions were pretty cool, but still, there wasn't anything particularly awe-inspiring.

It just feels like no one really wanted to put the work into any particular aspect of the movie.

Marc v4.0 · 04-04-2010, 09:49 PM

Maybe I saw a different movie cause I was overall very pleased with the experience even if I did have to wear those damn stupid glasses cause i bought tickets for the 3d without realizing it.

Seil · 04-04-2010, 10:56 PM

Marc v4.0 · 04-04-2010, 11:00 PM

I never listen to Cracked about anything related to movies ever since I read an article that said the Halloween series didn't go all supernatural until the 4th Movie or something, and a review of Terminator: Salvation by someone who obviously fell asleep during the last half of the movie.

Everything else is funny, but the movie stuff generally blows

BitVyper · 04-04-2010, 11:13 PM

Yeah, I agree with Marc there. I found this movie thoroughly disappointing, but I don't see any particularly strong parallels with TF.

Kyanbu The Legend · 04-04-2010, 11:14 PM

Didn't see it. But my mom and step dad did. I doubt they liked it since they didn't even talk about it. (they usually do)

I also heard it sucked from my uncle who read a review about it online (part of the reason I didn't go to see it). The 3D was mostly just thrown in there and looked out of place.

Karrrrrrrrrrrresche · 04-04-2010, 11:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Marc v1.0

I never listen to Cracked about anything related to movies ever since I read an article that said the Halloween series didn't go all supernatural until the 4th Movie or something, and a review of Terminator: Salvation by someone who obviously fell asleep during the last half of the movie.

Everything else is funny, but the movie stuff generally blows

CONCEDE THAT THE EAGLE IS INDEED UNINTERESTED.

CONCEDE IT.

Magus · 04-04-2010, 11:42 PM

USA Today lampooned this movie for its overuse of phrases like "Beware the Kraken!" and "We must flee before Zeus unleashes the Kraken!" and "The Kraken shall be the death of us all!" and "Release the Kraken!" and "The Kraken cometh!" and "Behold the Kraken!" and "Run! The Kraken! Run!" and "The Kraken! The horror! The horror!" etc. and then the kraken was insanely underwhelming.

It had better have turned out to have been one badass kraken for this sort of terror. And what's up with exact lines being stolen from Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest? It also had a kraken and had Davey Jones going "Release the Kraken!" Zeus should've said something else I guess. Unless that movie stole the line from the original Clash of the Titans...

Also I'm not surprised that Liam Neeson was the only actor giving it his all in this epic, I think he was the only actor who gave a shit in Star Wars: The Phantom Menace too.

TDK · 04-04-2010, 11:50 PM

This movie was awful. The plot was meandering, the special effects pretty average, and as stated, Perseus seemed a little confused about who exactly he hated. Plus, the anti-god guys seemed a little too well-informed. "Yeah, let's deny the gods our worship because that is clearly where they get their power!" I'm confused as to how they know this, along with other things.

Overall, the movie made little sense.

That said, I was highly entertained.

BitVyper · 04-05-2010, 12:00 AM

I'm almost willing to forgive the actors because they had to contend with the writing and direction, and I think most of them just gave up.

04-04-2010, 09:16 PM	#1
BitVyper History's Strongest Dilettante Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Arcadia Posts: 6,662	Clash of the Titans is kind of sucky Just incase you were going to go in the hopes of it being spectacularly bad, I wouldn't bother. It's pretty clear that no one involved with the film particularly cared about it. The guy who plays Zeus seems like he might have actually been trying, and that's about all I can say in the movie's favour. Beyond that though, the acting ranges from mediocre to terrible. The guy playing Hades feels like he's trying to be a cross between Grima Wormtongue and Sauron, but he fails miserably. The fact that noone even seems to care that they're ancient Greeks makes them seem more like LARPers than the characters they're portraying. The writing is mostly bad. Perseus can't seem to get who he really truly hates with the fire of a thousand suns straight. The vague romance is just sorta tacked on like they realised they needed one at the last second. The plot is largely changed into something that doesn't make a lot of sense("we are defying the gods because.... um... Grrr! We are defying the gods!?"), and none of the characters are particularly memorable. The visuals are mostly mediocre with a side of bad. The Medusa especially was disappointing, partly due to this, and partly due to poor direction. Keeping her out of sight most of the time could have invoked subtle horror if it had been done right. Here it's just like they used it as an excuse to not bother putting too much work into her. I would bet that if you took away all the shadows in that scene, she'd look like something off a PS2. Now the giant scorpions were pretty cool, but still, there wasn't anything particularly awe-inspiring. It just feels like no one really wanted to put the work into any particular aspect of the movie. __________________ "There are worlds out there where the sky is burning, and the sea is asleep, and the rivers dream. People made of smoke and cities made of song. Somewhere there's danger, somewhere there's injustice, somewhere else the tea's getting cold. Come on, Ace; we've got work to do!" Awesome art be here.

04-04-2010, 09:49 PM	#2
Marc v4.0 Fight Me, Nerds Join Date: Oct 2008 Posts: 3,470	Maybe I saw a different movie cause I was overall very pleased with the experience even if I did have to wear those damn stupid glasses cause i bought tickets for the 3d without realizing it. __________________

04-04-2010, 11:00 PM	#4
Marc v4.0 Fight Me, Nerds Join Date: Oct 2008 Posts: 3,470	I never listen to Cracked about anything related to movies ever since I read an article that said the Halloween series didn't go all supernatural until the 4th Movie or something, and a review of Terminator: Salvation by someone who obviously fell asleep during the last half of the movie. Everything else is funny, but the movie stuff generally blows __________________

04-04-2010, 11:13 PM	#5
BitVyper History's Strongest Dilettante Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Arcadia Posts: 6,662	Yeah, I agree with Marc there. I found this movie thoroughly disappointing, but I don't see any particularly strong parallels with TF. __________________ "There are worlds out there where the sky is burning, and the sea is asleep, and the rivers dream. People made of smoke and cities made of song. Somewhere there's danger, somewhere there's injustice, somewhere else the tea's getting cold. Come on, Ace; we've got work to do!" Awesome art be here. Last edited by BitVyper; 04-04-2010 at 11:16 PM.

04-04-2010, 11:14 PM	#6
Kyanbu The Legend Local Rookie Indie Dev Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: New Jersey Posts: 5,497	Didn't see it. But my mom and step dad did. I doubt they liked it since they didn't even talk about it. (they usually do) I also heard it sucked from my uncle who read a review about it online (part of the reason I didn't go to see it). The 3D was mostly just thrown in there and looked out of place. __________________

04-04-2010, 10:56 PM	#3
Seil Super stressed! Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: British Columbia Posts: 8,081

04-04-2010, 11:42 PM	#8
Magus Archer and Armstrong vs. the World Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Pennsylvania Posts: 7,164	USA Today lampooned this movie for its overuse of phrases like "Beware the Kraken!" and "We must flee before Zeus unleashes the Kraken!" and "The Kraken shall be the death of us all!" and "Release the Kraken!" and "The Kraken cometh!" and "Behold the Kraken!" and "Run! The Kraken! Run!" and "The Kraken! The horror! The horror!" etc. and then the kraken was insanely underwhelming. It had better have turned out to have been one badass kraken for this sort of terror. And what's up with exact lines being stolen from Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest? It also had a kraken and had Davey Jones going "Release the Kraken!" Zeus should've said something else I guess. Unless that movie stole the line from the original Clash of the Titans... Also I'm not surprised that Liam Neeson was the only actor giving it his all in this epic, I think he was the only actor who gave a shit in Star Wars: The Phantom Menace too. __________________ The Valiant Review

04-04-2010, 11:50 PM	#9
TDK Sent to the cornfield Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Reality Posts: 2,914	This movie was awful. The plot was meandering, the special effects pretty average, and as stated, Perseus seemed a little confused about who exactly he hated. Plus, the anti-god guys seemed a little too well-informed. "Yeah, let's deny the gods our worship because that is clearly where they get their power!" I'm confused as to how they know this, along with other things. Overall, the movie made little sense. That said, I was highly entertained.

04-05-2010, 12:00 AM	#10
BitVyper History's Strongest Dilettante Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Arcadia Posts: 6,662	I'm almost willing to forgive the actors because they had to contend with the writing and direction, and I think most of them just gave up. __________________ "There are worlds out there where the sky is burning, and the sea is asleep, and the rivers dream. People made of smoke and cities made of song. Somewhere there's danger, somewhere there's injustice, somewhere else the tea's getting cold. Come on, Ace; we've got work to do!" Awesome art be here.

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