What do women enjoy conversing about?

Solid Snake · 12-11-2006, 12:41 PM

I'm sure the last thing any self-respecting message board filled with a predominantly male population needs is yet another topic analyzing the desires and behaviorisms of women, but I have a fairly unique situation that could use all the help it could get, so I figure here's as good a place as any to ask for help.

Lately I've fallen into the classic "just friends ladder material" quandry with most the women I know and am friends with. I'm pretty much the classic submissive nice guy around women who tries to please them and is generally honest with them, but that never scores points in the romantic department.

Anywhoo, I've tried stepping up my game lately and sure enough, treating women with a bit more of an aura of mystery and a bit more assertiveness has led to a couple more dates. But these days the classic problem has become, that on my first date I simply run out of things to talk about -- questions to ask her, things to debate and ponder -- and about two-thirds of the way through the date, the conversation just goes silent.

Well not totally silent, of course -- but it becomes forced, many more awkward pauses and many less things of value or merit to say.

So I need to know; what do women like to talk about? And, how can I breach into topics with women on dates without sounding too much of a "nice guy?" It seems a tight line to walk, because I essentially have to keep conversations going without bending over for her every whim. I have to ask her questions about herself without seeming too interested, and thus, too easy a catch.

Any ideas from those of you out there who are more successful daters?

Azisien · 12-11-2006, 12:48 PM

Two-thirds of the way through is when you whip out your Yu Gi Oh deck and challenge her to a duel.

And uh, you talk about things you're both interested in. I'm not all that sure you can generalize topics all women enjoy conversing about, in the same way you couldn't do it for all men...

Silence in the middle of a date is bad, though.

Solid Snake · 12-11-2006, 12:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Azisien

Silence in the middle of a date is bad, though.

Precisely. But you see, given my overanalytical nature, I tend to be silent at moments during dates even if I really do have something to say or even if I'm really interested. I just overthink things.

I must have topics pre-arranged for this so I don't have to overthink things.

BlackMageGirl! · 12-11-2006, 01:12 PM

Well, how much do you know about her? Does she like books, video games, other things? Where does she work/what does she do?

And since Christmas is comin', you can ask her what she's plannin' for Christmas and other things.

Just throwin' some ideas out there. =D

CelesJessa · 12-11-2006, 02:07 PM

Just talk about the same stuff with her that you would your friends (obviously you might not wanto to jump directly into the quality of your belches or other personal stuff like that) but she will probably be interested in the same type of things you are. Movies, books, music, etc etc. Just converse with her.

Personally, I quite enjoy talking about video games.

Fifthfiend · 12-11-2006, 02:15 PM

Go somewhere you can dance. Run out of things to say? Say, hey, wanna dance?

Bar that, shit, find a pool hall, or an arcade or something. You can kill a lot of silence for the cost of a few games' worth of Ski-Ball.

Bar that, there's a reason you find the words "date" and "movie" so often in close proximity. Two hours of having people who are much better at it than you are up there on the screen doing the talking for you, and then all you have to stress is when to put your arm around her and where it's appropriate to put your hand.

Bar that, take the Depeche Mode's advice and learn to enjoy the silence. Always remember, long quiet pauses 2/3 of the way through a date are God's way of saying you're probably supposed to be making out.

Also always remember, any advice I offer is at least 95% undiluted bullshit. Distill and mix accordingly.

Mirai Gen · 12-11-2006, 03:48 PM

I feel it worth noting that, while I'm not the foremost expert on this sort of thing, you generally try and go on dates where you don't absolutely have to sit and talk. That gets old real fast unless you find a miracle girl/guy who happens to have endlessly interesting things to say.

When you're together, generally the idea is to throw out pre-determined ideas of what you should and shouldn't do and have fun. The fastest way to do that is to do activities that don't involve petty small talk. If you're having a problem getting into conversations, well, don't bother.

Like Fifth said, if you can hear crickets chirp, say "Hey, let's dance!"

Fifthfiend · 12-11-2006, 03:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mirai

Like Fifth said, if you can hear crickets chirp, say "Hey, let's dance!"

You agree with me way more often than can possibly be healthy.

Mirai Gen · 12-11-2006, 04:24 PM

Quote:

You agree with me way more often than can possibly be healthy.

I'm just a poser like that. Next I'll be screaming FUCKING BANNED when people start insulting Devil May Cry 3.

Back on task: By the way, if there is a time when something has to be said, stick to the Bartender's Rules - No religion or politics. You're pretty well read SS, so try and bust out a new article about something funny or interesting. Appeal to intellect.

Provided you're not 'in da club' and you haven't had tons of drinks, trying to at least appear intelligent or strong-willed - the truth of that can come out after the out-making has occurred - means alot.

Roy_D_Mylote · 12-11-2006, 07:45 PM

Do what I do, and have girls around you that will just walk up to you and say "boobies".

I swear to God.

12-11-2006, 12:41 PM	#1
Solid Snake Erotic Esquire Join Date: Nov 2003 Posts: 5,563	What do women enjoy conversing about? I'm sure the last thing any self-respecting message board filled with a predominantly male population needs is yet another topic analyzing the desires and behaviorisms of women, but I have a fairly unique situation that could use all the help it could get, so I figure here's as good a place as any to ask for help. Lately I've fallen into the classic "just friends ladder material" quandry with most the women I know and am friends with. I'm pretty much the classic submissive nice guy around women who tries to please them and is generally honest with them, but that never scores points in the romantic department. Anywhoo, I've tried stepping up my game lately and sure enough, treating women with a bit more of an aura of mystery and a bit more assertiveness has led to a couple more dates. But these days the classic problem has become, that on my first date I simply run out of things to talk about -- questions to ask her, things to debate and ponder -- and about two-thirds of the way through the date, the conversation just goes silent. Well not totally silent, of course -- but it becomes forced, many more awkward pauses and many less things of value or merit to say. So I need to know; what do women like to talk about? And, how can I breach into topics with women on dates without sounding too much of a "nice guy?" It seems a tight line to walk, because I essentially have to keep conversations going without bending over for her every whim. I have to ask her questions about herself without seeming too interested, and thus, too easy a catch. Any ideas from those of you out there who are more successful daters? __________________ *WARNING:* Snek's all up in this thread. Be prepared to read massive walls of text.

12-11-2006, 02:07 PM	#5
CelesJessa DA-DA-DA-DAA DAA DAA DA DA-DAAAAAA! Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: Zanzibar Land Posts: 6,531	Just talk about the same stuff with her that you would your friends (obviously you might not wanto to jump directly into the quality of your belches or other personal stuff like that) but she will probably be interested in the same type of things you are. Movies, books, music, etc etc. Just converse with her. Personally, I quite enjoy talking about video games. __________________

12-11-2006, 02:15 PM	#6
Fifthfiend for all seasons Join Date: Feb 2004 Posts: 19,409	Go somewhere you can dance. Run out of things to say? Say, hey, wanna dance? Bar that, shit, find a pool hall, or an arcade or something. You can kill a lot of silence for the cost of a few games' worth of Ski-Ball. Bar that, there's a reason you find the words "date" and "movie" so often in close proximity. Two hours of having people who are much better at it than you are up there on the screen doing the talking for you, and then all you have to stress is when to put your arm around her and where it's appropriate to put your hand. Bar that, take the Depeche Mode's advice and learn to enjoy the silence. Always remember, long quiet pauses 2/3 of the way through a date are God's way of saying you're probably supposed to be making out. Also always remember, any advice I offer is at least 95% undiluted bullshit. Distill and mix accordingly. __________________ check out my buttspresso Last edited by Fifthfiend; 12-11-2006 at 02:30 PM.

12-11-2006, 03:48 PM	#7
Mirai Gen We are Geth. Join Date: Nov 2003 Posts: 14,032	I feel it worth noting that, while I'm not the foremost expert on this sort of thing, you generally try and go on dates where you don't absolutely have to sit and talk. That gets old real fast unless you find a miracle girl/guy who happens to have endlessly interesting things to say. When you're together, generally the idea is to throw out pre-determined ideas of what you should and shouldn't do and have fun. The fastest way to do that is to do activities that don't involve petty small talk. If you're having a problem getting into conversations, well, don't bother. Like Fifth said, if you can hear crickets chirp, say "Hey, let's dance!" __________________

12-11-2006, 07:45 PM	#10
Roy_D_Mylote Quis custodiet ipsos custodes? Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: The sky. Posts: 1,030	Do what I do, and have girls around you that will just walk up to you and say "boobies". I swear to God. __________________ I hate roleclaims.

12-11-2006, 12:48 PM	#2
Azisien wat Join Date: Jan 2005 Posts: 7,177	Two-thirds of the way through is when you whip out your Yu Gi Oh deck and challenge her to a duel. And uh, you talk about things you're both interested in. I'm not all that sure you can generalize topics all women enjoy conversing about, in the same way you couldn't do it for all men... Silence in the middle of a date is bad, though.

12-11-2006, 01:12 PM	#4
BlackMageGirl! Oh hi! :D Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Currently in reality! Posts: 2,688	Well, how much do you know about her? Does she like books, video games, other things? Where does she work/what does she do? And since Christmas is comin', you can ask her what she's plannin' for Christmas and other things. Just throwin' some ideas out there. =D