OH NOES NOT ANOTHER ONE! Let's Play Pokemon EMERALD

[Ecks]

Okay guys, I am not, in fact, dead. I haven't been home (and thus haven't had access to my stuff) for a few days, I'm not even home right now, I'm at a buddy's place using his intarwebs to post this for ya.

Really sorry about how late this is starting to get, but NO I do not plan on putting this on hiatus. I'll get an update out SOONISH.

[Daimo Mac, The Blue Light of Hope]

Huzzah

[Ecks]

It's Time for Good News, Bad News, with your host, EckScizor!

First, the Bad News.

I got kicked out of my house on July 8th. This was due to a lot of tension building betwixt myself and the parental units, and was a long time coming. Things just came to a head, neither party was going to back down, I was given an ultimatum and I said, in less crude and vulgar terms, "Fuck you guys." I was also unemployed around this time. The actual chapter isn't done yet either, due to aforementioned woes.

Now for the Good News!

I am not homeless. I've been put up by my brother (who lives with our aunt and his mother). I am now posting from this residence, so I have intarwebs. I am now currently employed (I go in for OTJ training at about 10am EST, I need to go get some shuteye xp), so my financial issues may clear up soon... AND I HAVE A MINI-UPDATE LINED UP FOR SOON-ISH RELEASE! Can't do it now, as it's on my laptop, and I'll need to do some USB wizardry to put the appropriate files where I can access 'em on an internet capable machine (my laptop currently isn't).

I would like to apologize, once again, for the OBSCENELY LONG TIME I've made you guys wait for an update.

[DarkDrgon]

dude, after all that thinking about an LP update would be the last thing on my mind

[Ecks]

Name: Mac
Species: Slakoth
Age: Approx. 2 years
Sex: Male

Mac, as expected of most Slakoth, is incredibly lazy and sleepy. He is also, however, rather different from most in that he has a secret ambition: he wants to take a nap at least once in as many different locales as he can. When he heard the commotion caused by Ecks' defeat of the Aqua Grunt in Petalburg Woods, he roused himself, and ambushed Ecks in the hopes that he would be captured, a ploy that worked perfectly. Since, he has proven himself a valuable, if not valued (at least not by Worf), member of the team.

Despite his narcolepsy and slothful ways, Mac is actually quite intelligent and strong for a Pokemon of his age and species, and his claws are especially sharp compared to Kentucky's.

You tryin' to say my talons aren't sharp?

No, Ken, it was just a flavor-text, in-universe way to reference the fact that he gets STAB (Same Type as Attack Bonus) on his Scratch attack.

Oh. I thought you didn't care about the fourth wall?

For the flavor-text stuff like Character Profiles? Yeah, I do. Otherwise, if there is a joke to be had at its expense, fourth wall be damned.

I wondered why it never seems to last more than five or six lines of dialogue into a chapter...

What is it that you are referencing, Councilor, when you speak of this 'fourth wall'? I'm not sure I understand what walls have to do with humor.

In a fictitious work, the 'fourth wall' is a screen (whether real, in the case of television, movies, video games, and internet medium, or imagined, as in theater) that seperates the audience from the work in question. It is a necessary component for the willing suspension of disbelief. This is the phenomenon that allows fiction to seem realistic, as though it is really happening in front of you. The term fourth wall comes from the fact that in theater (and thus television, movies, etc. that came after it) the sets were constructed of only three walls, so that the fourth (the one that should sit in front of the audience) would not obstruct the view of the stage.

So... you are saying that our adventures aren't really happening? That we are merely unwitting actors in an entertaining parody?

No dude, this stuff is REALLY happening. Ecks just pretends that there are other people paying attention to the random things he says out loud to himself. We just humor him because when he finally realizes it, it'll crush his spirit so badly... I'm going to laugh so hard I'll die.

Hardy har har. I'll remember this next time you're having feelings of inadequacy.

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz... heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy yyyyy.... you... finally... got around... to it...

Yep. That dork who writes our stuff was gone all month and didn't work on it at all. He's spent the last week reading Tolkien instead of playing, screencapping, and writing our adventures.

God, what a fag.

Hey! You're not in this update, Pepper.

Oh, fuck, sorry Ecks.

Ugh, I haven't even written her introduction and she's already being vulgar and butting into everything.

Who is that, Captain?

A new crew member who's making her debut next chapter. Pretend you haven't seen her yet.

Seen who?

Seen Pep- Oh, you're good, dude.

.......

Oh, hey Runt. Haven't heard from you in a couple of chapters.

.......

I've missed the eloquence of your non-speech.

---

OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD I'M SO SORRY. Seriously. My inactivity is inexcuseable. It's totally not cool at all. For the record, as I'm sure this isn't going to be posted the day I type it, I wrote this AND worked on the chapter following this update on the Eighth of July. Oh and then there was that whole getting kicked out of my house thing. And not having my laptop connected to intarwebs. I'm posting this from a library with piss-poor connection speed while trying to download a closed beta for a game (yeah, pretty dumb, huh?)

Also, sneak peek at Pepper. It's a female. I figured I needed something to balance out the testosterone, yet at least this early in her character (I haven't written any dialogue or story for the next chapter yet, I've only just played through and taken screens) she's swearing like a sailor and being nosy.

P.S. Mods (Mash or whoever else doesn't take kindly to profanity and or slurs) if "fag" is totally unacceptable for NPF use, kindly post a warning in mod colors, and I will fix it... or just fix it yourselves, whichever floats your boat.

[Thadius]

Originally Posted by EckScizor

An update

My heart!

*Thump*

[mauve]

Hey Ecks! Good to see you again! Also, wooo updates!!

[Great Cartoonist]

Oh snap now I have even more reason to finish mine

it'll be done soon I promise don't worry

[Ecks]

Fear not, my good fellows (and gentle lass)! I am probably very nearly close to halfway through the write-up for the actual chapter. I just need a little time to come down from ambitious D&D playing (and DMing, le gasp!), my first real week of work (inventorying Meijer freezers full of ice cream... mmmmmmm ice cream), and video gaeman like a madman (close to done with Arkham Asylum, 'bout halfway through Brutal Legend and Final Fantasy XIII) so I can sit down, finish the bastard, and post it. The screenshots are already uploaded.

[Daimo Mac, The Blue Light of Hope]

zzzzzZZzzZZZZzzzz

Hmm what? Oh...new update...yaaay

zzzzZzzZZZZzzzz