On the market for a Arch-Nemesis - Page 2

Professor Smarmiarty · 03-19-2008, 12:27 AM

What do you have to offer as a prospective hero? It's a villains market out here.

water · 03-19-2008, 01:09 PM

Are you going to be a wimpy hero? A strong one, smart, comedic? I must know so I might be able to decide your application. Fill out the forms in triplicate please.

Bells · 03-19-2008, 06:42 PM

Loyal2NES's : Yes, i've heard of all thge burocratic crap... They agve me like 5 diffenret forms on 4 colors (there were 2 blue ones... go figure) that i was supposed to fill and duplicates and andover to apply for a "Non-sidekick takeover Sidekick takeover" which was basicly having a sidekick taking my place in case i get injured by they cant take me out permanently with that, and if i die, the sidekick gets no Refund... the thing is, I DONT HAVE a sidekick!

Noncontradictory: Yes yes this seems quite the offer there... but i must inquire on your view about Giant Deathrays... you know, we may not need a deathray in our symbiotic releationship but it's nice to keep a view open.

PyrosNine: Pyros, you seem like a person with a wider view of the big picture about the big game. Have your people call my people and our people can meet at the nearest IHOP for a meeting, who knows... things could bloom or boom... maybe both!

Barrel-Hating Sycophant & water: you know... i was kinda looking for that "Edgy-not-anti-hero" guy? You know? Not quite The Punisher, not quite Spiderman... a little "Wayne" a little "Stark"... something with leather.. but on the promise of creating a dark past i could, maybe, get a family member killed by my Arch-nemesis... i have a couple of uncles i dont really like.....

Also... let me see, there is Medical, dental, and a weekly 20% discount cupon on either Walmart or Mc'Donalds

Kim · 03-19-2008, 07:28 PM

Giant Deathrays: Although I like to be a little more personal about my evil, I am currently having blueprints drawn up for a giant deathray, as I believe it is better to have it and not need it than to need it and not have it. I believe construction begins on the moon in November, and if you'd like to show up for the groundbreaking and can get past security, you are more than welcome to attend. We'll have pizza, tacos, and punch.

As for why I am building it on the moon, it is so that even if it fails, the self-destruct sequence goes off, destroying the moon, or at least a large portion of it. Fiery moonrock rains down from the sky, and the change in the gravitational pull from the moon affects tides, among other things, possibly doing a lot of harm to the environment.

Just so you don't think I am an idiot for revealing this, this is merely one of many backup plans, this one even having a backup plan of its own. Worry not, I shall do my best to destroy you utterly.

Professor Smarmiarty · 03-19-2008, 07:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bellsouth Minion

Barrel-Hating Sycophant & water: you know... i was kinda looking for that "Edgy-not-anti-hero" guy? You know? Not quite The Punisher, not quite Spiderman... a little "Wayne" a little "Stark"... something with leather.. but on the promise of creating a dark past i could, maybe, get a family member killed by my Arch-nemesis... i have a couple of uncles i dont really like.....

Sorry I'm evil enough that I don't need a partial evil hero to compensate. I don't need any of that semi-evil, "Oh I'm so troubled" whineyness hanging around. I'll stick to Superman as my enemy.

Flarecobra · 03-19-2008, 07:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PyrosNine

How about you be MY Arch Nemesis, and spend every waking moment deciding how you're going to ruin my day, in some way that corresponds to whatever the hell it is I'm doing that day despite any impossibilities that would keep you from doing it. And then just make it look like it was your intention to do this from the beginning, and that I just happened to fortuitously stumble upon your evil plan in time to save the day.

Though if you do need an Arch-Nemesis, I can do generic villain laughter, can border the line of being evil yet not damned evil, and look good in tight leather, and will somehow find a way to survive every cliched death, ever!

Sadly, I don't do weekends, or attack Sailor Moon esque characters, as my grievous overacting often leads to my downfall....

Pyros, I thought I was your arch-rival.

DFM · 03-19-2008, 11:27 PM

If you don't mind having your soul devoured and your body left a flayed, rotting husk to be mounted as a trophy and a warning, I'll take up the offer.

I don't get much work these days, most heroes are looking for rivalries that are more... long term.

water · 03-20-2008, 09:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bellsouth Minion

Barrel-Hating Sycophant & water: you know... i was kinda looking for that "Edgy-not-anti-hero" guy? You know? Not quite The Punisher, not quite Spiderman... a little "Wayne" a little "Stark"... something with leather.. but on the promise of creating a dark past i could, maybe, get a family member killed by my Arch-nemesis... i have a couple of uncles i dont really like.....

Ok I'll take you up on your offer. I like to corrupt and otherwise destroy a person without killing them. Cause if youre Wayne, I'm the Joker. From hell. And back.

secretskull · 03-20-2008, 09:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bellsouth Minion

Also... let me see, there is Medical, dental, and a weekly 20% discount cupon on either Walmart or Mc'Donalds

I was considering it, I really was. There isn't much market for schizophrenic villains these days. Then I saw that.

Walmart and McDonalds? I'm a villain, if I eat anywhere, it better be serving high class food. Something with lots of blood and entrails. And good fries.

Hex · 03-20-2008, 09:36 AM

Heres my basic arch-nemesis info survey.

Name: Hex, Destroyer of Nations
Occupation: Terrorist, Necromancer (controls undead), Pyromancer (controls fire), Pyronecromancer (controls flaming undead), part time blackjack player
Goals: Mass destruction, undead armies, setting up a conferance call with the gods and various world leaders, having a healthier diet (as to live longer, though I could just use necromancey. That would lose my youthful appearance though)
Likes: Heavy music, Black robes, scary masks, the rain, spending a lifetime with someone I loathe
Pet peeves: Huggy love evreyone superheroes, useless superheroes, leagues of superheroes (thats cheating!), cliche villains, science
Employees: 3 loyal followers (1 hot guy, 1 sexy woman, 1 little freak), various management positions employed by undead, mailroom full of lower-imps, and a roomy office space full of fresh zombies! We employ over 3000 undead and demons, and still growing!

A note about the benefits, since I'm trying to eat better, I would like to see if I could get my discounts replaced with somthing of equal value. I also have no need of any form of life insurance because I don't ever plan on dying. However, I do need great dental to last my teeth through those countless millenia

Edit: And I also qualify for multiple mental diseases, including but not limited to schitziphrenia, psychosis, advanced insanity, gambling addiction, ect. We can talk about government benefits later.

03-19-2008, 06:42 PM	#13
Bells That's so PC of you Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: In a Server-sided Dimension where time is meaningless Posts: 10,490	Loyal2NES's : Yes, i've heard of all thge burocratic crap... They agve me like 5 diffenret forms on 4 colors (there were 2 blue ones... go figure) that i was supposed to fill and duplicates and andover to apply for a "Non-sidekick takeover Sidekick takeover" which was basicly having a sidekick taking my place in case i get injured by they cant take me out permanently with that, and if i die, the sidekick gets no Refund... the thing is, I DONT HAVE a sidekick! Noncontradictory: Yes yes this seems quite the offer there... but i must inquire on your view about Giant Deathrays... you know, we may not need a deathray in our symbiotic releationship but it's nice to keep a view open. PyrosNine: Pyros, you seem like a person with a wider view of the big picture about the big game. Have your people call my people and our people can meet at the nearest IHOP for a meeting, who knows... things could bloom or boom... maybe both! Barrel-Hating Sycophant & water: you know... i was kinda looking for that "Edgy-not-anti-hero" guy? You know? Not quite The Punisher, not quite Spiderman... a little "Wayne" a little "Stark"... something with leather.. but on the promise of creating a dark past i could, maybe, get a family member killed by my Arch-nemesis... i have a couple of uncles i dont really like..... Also... let me see, there is Medical, dental, and a weekly 20% discount cupon on either Walmart or Mc'Donalds __________________ *BELLS STORE : Clothes! You wear* them! Free US Shipping Subscription System? WTF?! Zazzle Black!**

03-19-2008, 07:28 PM	#14
Kim adorable Join Date: Sep 2007 Posts: 12,950	Giant Deathrays: Although I like to be a little more personal about my evil, I am currently having blueprints drawn up for a giant deathray, as I believe it is better to have it and not need it than to need it and not have it. I believe construction begins on the moon in November, and if you'd like to show up for the groundbreaking and can get past security, you are more than welcome to attend. We'll have pizza, tacos, and punch. As for why I am building it on the moon, it is so that even if it fails, the self-destruct sequence goes off, destroying the moon, or at least a large portion of it. Fiery moonrock rains down from the sky, and the change in the gravitational pull from the moon affects tides, among other things, possibly doing a lot of harm to the environment. Just so you don't think I am an idiot for revealing this, this is merely one of many backup plans, this one even having a backup plan of its own. Worry not, I shall do my best to destroy you utterly. __________________ this post is about how to successfully H the Kimmy

03-19-2008, 11:27 PM	#17
DFM Om Nom Nom Join Date: Sep 2005 Posts: 3,850	If you don't mind having your soul devoured and your body left a flayed, rotting husk to be mounted as a trophy and a warning, I'll take up the offer. I don't get much work these days, most heroes are looking for rivalries that are more... long term. __________________ [14:26] ManoftheRus: YOU GODDAMN SNEAKY DEE

03-20-2008, 09:36 AM	#20
Hex I.. Really don't think he knows... Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: A pit of trash Posts: 102	My application Heres my basic arch-nemesis info survey. Name: Hex, Destroyer of Nations Occupation: Terrorist, Necromancer (controls undead), Pyromancer (controls fire), Pyronecromancer (controls flaming undead), part time blackjack player Goals: Mass destruction, undead armies, setting up a conferance call with the gods and various world leaders, having a healthier diet (as to live longer, though I could just use necromancey. That would lose my youthful appearance though) Likes: Heavy music, Black robes, scary masks, the rain, spending a lifetime with someone I loathe Pet peeves: Huggy love evreyone superheroes, useless superheroes, leagues of superheroes (thats cheating!), cliche villains, science Employees: 3 loyal followers (1 hot guy, 1 sexy woman, 1 little freak), various management positions employed by undead, mailroom full of lower-imps, and a roomy office space full of fresh zombies! We employ over 3000 undead and demons, and still growing! A note about the benefits, since I'm trying to eat better, I would like to see if I could get my discounts replaced with somthing of equal value. I also have no need of any form of life insurance because I don't ever plan on dying. However, I do need great dental to last my teeth through those countless millenia Edit: And I also qualify for multiple mental diseases, including but not limited to schitziphrenia, psychosis, advanced insanity, gambling addiction, ect. We can talk about government benefits later. __________________ 75% of forum signitures have a percentage in them, if your part of the 25% that... aww, s* shiney*: Snizap. Hex: Huh? shiney: Die in a fire! Hex: I love you too shiney Last edited by Hex; 03-20-2008 at 09:39 AM.*

03-19-2008, 12:27 AM	#11
Professor Smarmiarty Sent to the cornfield Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: K-space Posts: 9,758	What do you have to offer as a prospective hero? It's a villains market out here.