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Unread 11-03-2013, 11:44 PM   #11
MSperoni
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I have a number of ideas where this scene could go, but I don't know how long I should keep focused on a flashback.

Do you all like extended flashbacks or do you prefer your stories to stick to the present and keep moving forward?

I don't read enough books/comics to know what's popular in that regard. I wanna do a good job with the story, but I also want to make it entertaining for readers.
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Unread 11-04-2013, 12:51 PM   #12
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Speaking pacing-wise, I generally prefer my flashbacks to be either brief interludes (1-2 pages at most) or entire chapters (not of backstory. Flashbacks are at their best when they're used for dramatic irony or reveals)
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Unread 11-04-2013, 12:54 PM   #13
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As someone who reads this comic and happens to usually enjoy it, I'd like to say that the last page was excellent. And, I'm glad you removed the "no" from the last line, but maybe that's just because I wanted to take the moment seriously. It definitely packed a lot more punch without the "no" to snap me out of it. To be quite honest, I didn't even realize the reference 'til seeing it pointed out here.

And I think that's a good thing!

So, yeah, this was good. I don't like Poe's face in the third-to-last panel, as it kind of bugs me in ways I am unable to put into words, but I think I understand what it was intended as either way.

Thanks for the comic! I'll continue looking forward to more.

Last edited by Taioko; 11-04-2013 at 12:59 PM.
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Unread 11-04-2013, 02:04 PM   #14
MSperoni
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MSperoni would dive into a lake to save a drowning girl from a sinking car, without even stopping to think about how dangerous it was. MSperoni would dive into a lake to save a drowning girl from a sinking car, without even stopping to think about how dangerous it was. MSperoni would dive into a lake to save a drowning girl from a sinking car, without even stopping to think about how dangerous it was. MSperoni would dive into a lake to save a drowning girl from a sinking car, without even stopping to think about how dangerous it was. MSperoni would dive into a lake to save a drowning girl from a sinking car, without even stopping to think about how dangerous it was. MSperoni would dive into a lake to save a drowning girl from a sinking car, without even stopping to think about how dangerous it was. MSperoni would dive into a lake to save a drowning girl from a sinking car, without even stopping to think about how dangerous it was. MSperoni would dive into a lake to save a drowning girl from a sinking car, without even stopping to think about how dangerous it was. MSperoni would dive into a lake to save a drowning girl from a sinking car, without even stopping to think about how dangerous it was.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SaltyKracka View Post
Speaking pacing-wise, I generally prefer my flashbacks to be either brief interludes (1-2 pages at most) or entire chapters (not of backstory. Flashbacks are at their best when they're used for dramatic irony or reveals)
Fortunately for you, this one is a little of all of that!


Quote:
Originally Posted by Taioko View Post
Thanks for the comic! I'll continue looking forward to more.
Good! Glad you like it! Dunno why Poe's face looks weird in that panel.
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Unread 11-04-2013, 07:25 PM   #15
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Dreadful At least that's what it looks like to me.

Quote:
Originally Posted by MSperoni View Post
Dunno why Poe's face looks weird in that panel.
If you want some art analysis: it's too round (or seems too round to me), compared to the previous panels.

Previously her face was a little more... I dunno the word, but it was a little narrower and while "angular" is the wrong word, it was closer to being angular than the last panel.

I actually didn't notice the discrepancy until someone else pointed it out, but upon examining it, that's what it seems to be.

That extra bit of roundness combined with her hair makes it look a little too ball-like, I think.

But I could be wrong.

Regardless, you're doing a good job, man. Enjoy.

(Oh, and I hope you don't mind, but, in the name of non-Italian food puns on your name: "Ma~tt Peroni, the San Fransisco treat! Ding-ding!")

EDIT: for those unaware, it was from this thread that food-puns came up. And, you know, I'm not actually altering his name this time! And he gets a catchy theme song! Go him!

And if he wants other non-food-pun-jokes:
~ He must be a boy with no arms and no legs in front of a door!
~ How much is a Matt? 'Cause we get one for each Japanese evil spirit!
~ I don't remember what the "S" stands for!
~ I'm really earning that "Dreadful" tag up there in multiple ways tonight!

(Serious: I really, really hope this doesn't bother you, Matt. If it does for real, just tell me to knock it off, and I will - I'll be glad to, in fact. And I'll be glad to edit and delete this stuff. Mostly, I'm just playing around in what's supposed to be a friendly way.)
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Last edited by tacticslion; 11-04-2013 at 07:31 PM. Reason: Linkies and Explanation
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Unread 11-04-2013, 10:44 PM   #16
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For some reason, I thought Poe was Kit in the first few panels. Then I remembered that Kit keeps her hair a certain way that should make her easily distinguishable from her sister.

I also did a google search earlier and apparently The Dreadful has it's own TVTropes page. I'm unsure of whether or not this is a good thing. Someone is also keeping it up, because they have up to the point before 'this' particular page in what they're pointing out.
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Unread 11-04-2013, 10:59 PM   #17
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Speaking only for myself... so far the flashback seems like it is relevant to the current plot... or at least certain key aspects of the current plot: tension between Kit and Liz, Poe as protector of Kit's feelings, lead up to Kit getting shot, etc. As long as that is the case, it just seems like more story, and not filler, which means it can be as long as it needs to.

Also, the pacing within the pages is very good, which makes it more engaging.

---------- Post added at 10:59 PM ---------- Previous post was at 10:48 PM ----------

P.S. Relative to earlier comments about Poe's face:

http://charlespsychology.com/downloads/PoeFace.gif
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Unread 11-05-2013, 01:40 AM   #18
MSperoni
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MSperoni would dive into a lake to save a drowning girl from a sinking car, without even stopping to think about how dangerous it was. MSperoni would dive into a lake to save a drowning girl from a sinking car, without even stopping to think about how dangerous it was. MSperoni would dive into a lake to save a drowning girl from a sinking car, without even stopping to think about how dangerous it was. MSperoni would dive into a lake to save a drowning girl from a sinking car, without even stopping to think about how dangerous it was. MSperoni would dive into a lake to save a drowning girl from a sinking car, without even stopping to think about how dangerous it was. MSperoni would dive into a lake to save a drowning girl from a sinking car, without even stopping to think about how dangerous it was. MSperoni would dive into a lake to save a drowning girl from a sinking car, without even stopping to think about how dangerous it was. MSperoni would dive into a lake to save a drowning girl from a sinking car, without even stopping to think about how dangerous it was. MSperoni would dive into a lake to save a drowning girl from a sinking car, without even stopping to think about how dangerous it was.
Dreadful

Quote:
Originally Posted by Red Mage Black View Post

I also did a google search earlier and apparently The Dreadful has it's own TVTropes page. I'm unsure of whether or not this is a good thing. Someone is also keeping it up, because they have up to the point before 'this' particular page in what they're pointing out.
Yup, I'm aware of the TVtropes page, I actually contribute in the forums! (I go by the name ExMile)


Quote:
Originally Posted by tacticslion View Post

Serious: I really, really hope this doesn't bother you, Matt.
I don't mind being made fun of because most everyone gets made fun of. I hate the Italian food puns because they're not just insulting to me, but they're insulting to Italians. Which is to say, my Dad, my Grandpa, my Grandma, etc.

Imagine if we called a Mexican member on NPF "Roberto Burrito" or "Miguel Taco" or "Rosalita Chimichanga" etc.

It's dumb and I hate it and I'm tired of hearing it from people.

And before someone says "You're white you don't have room to get offended", I'll comment that when my great grandparents immigrated to this country and moved to where I live now, being Italian didn't put you on equal footing with a "white" person. It was a lot easier than being black, for sure, but the KKK would go after Italians/Catholics as well around here.

But apart from lame Italian food jokes...I'm okay with most anything else. I can ignore things that bother me pretty well. I'd probably ignore the Italian stuff too if not for the fact I frequent NPF like I do.

Quote:
Originally Posted by epcharles View Post
P.S. Relative to earlier comments about Poe's face:

http://charlespsychology.com/downloads/PoeFace.gif
Yeah she looks a bit different there. *shrugs*. Guess I was just in a hurry
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Last edited by MSperoni; 11-05-2013 at 01:55 AM.
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Unread 11-05-2013, 12:30 PM   #19
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So, here's an idea: Try reading the last scene with the idea of Freud's id, ego and super-ego in mind.

I stopped and thought, "hey, it kind of works out well if you think of Kit as id, Liz as ego and Poe as superego." I'm not sure if those roles are necessarily well-poised to be extended into the comic at large, (or rather I do not believe they are able to be,) but for the duration of that page I think the roles work remarkably well.

Was this intentional?

Think about it! Kit comes in with a probably-alcoholic drink, is loud and boisterous as always, (id works well for Kit outside of this page really) and earlier is reported as... wellp, generally basic and instinctual, as always/usual.

Poe spends most of the page referring to the internalization of cultural rules, (something that wikipedia cites as important for the superego, and even though wikipedia shouldn't be used as much other than a springboard in a scholarly sense, for this I believe it is appropriate,) and she also spends time talking about parental units and spiritual topics and so forth, which are another few things important for the superego, while mentioning conflict with Liz (the id,) and acting as a somewhat caring and tender (somewhat parental) unit herself.

Liz, on the other hand, happens to be down-to-earth on this page and generally realistic, while moving between speaking with Poe (the superego,) and Liz, (the id,) briefly forcing herself to reconcile Liz's (the id's) desires with reality, (Jeanne's demanded plan,) and forcing them to work together for greater payoff in the longer run. (In the form of a successful heist.) And she speaks to both parties in the page, while Kit and Poe aren't shown having any dialogue. (thusly, the only relation between the two devilkin stated or shown upon the page is conflict, which suits our requirements as we could say that Liz is plausibly a mediator of sorts between the two of them, carrying Poe's spiritual message with her as she speaks to Kit.)

So yeah, I think this is kind of an interesting lens to view the page through, even if it's not flawless or academically perfect.

Cool, right?
I think it's cool.

Last edited by Taioko; 11-05-2013 at 12:34 PM.
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Unread 11-05-2013, 02:20 PM   #20
MSperoni
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MSperoni would dive into a lake to save a drowning girl from a sinking car, without even stopping to think about how dangerous it was. MSperoni would dive into a lake to save a drowning girl from a sinking car, without even stopping to think about how dangerous it was. MSperoni would dive into a lake to save a drowning girl from a sinking car, without even stopping to think about how dangerous it was. MSperoni would dive into a lake to save a drowning girl from a sinking car, without even stopping to think about how dangerous it was. MSperoni would dive into a lake to save a drowning girl from a sinking car, without even stopping to think about how dangerous it was. MSperoni would dive into a lake to save a drowning girl from a sinking car, without even stopping to think about how dangerous it was. MSperoni would dive into a lake to save a drowning girl from a sinking car, without even stopping to think about how dangerous it was. MSperoni would dive into a lake to save a drowning girl from a sinking car, without even stopping to think about how dangerous it was. MSperoni would dive into a lake to save a drowning girl from a sinking car, without even stopping to think about how dangerous it was.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Taioko View Post
So yeah, I think this is kind of an interesting lens to view the page through, even if it's not flawless or academically perfect.

I'm all for people looking at this comic through lenses and analyzing it!
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