NPF Avatars: Going where no man has gone before!

[PyrosNine]

"Oh my dear Ecurt, you know me far too little. Of course I would. I'm Pyros freaking Nine. If there's anything I won't do, it's whatever you expect me to do. Or something like that."

Pyros altered the direction of the portal a bit, kicked back a demon that attempted to make it's own break for it, until he connected to the toolshed of the damned. Here lay all the hellish and evil creations created by man, gods, and demons, sealed away lest they ruin the world. Any one of these could cause untold devastation, but the one he wanted could rule the seas.

He widened the portal a bit, and directed it to release a being of large size. "I call upon you, YeSbmrualelowni!"

Emerging from the portal came a hideous beast, multi limbed, covered in writhing flesh. It's feet were covered in eyes, it's eyes had feelers, and those feelers had more eyes. It had the bones of others stuck to it's flesh, and the very air about it reeked of evil.

"I AM FINALLY FREE TO RULE THE-" A deep, dark voice claimed. But before it could finish the sentence, Pyros closed the portal and blasted it with flame, and a vicious roar filled the air as the thing burned.

Strangely though, the Deep voice of the roar changed pitch as the thing was consumed by the flame, going from a Deeper than Bass to a high squeak voice.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhahhhhhh!"

When the flames cleared, Pyros threw a seal upon what remained, and bent it to his will. Suijin and Ecurt saw the thing for what it was, and were horrified.

Lying underneath the ashes of the beast was the most horrific, most evil vessel the world had ever known, that even the most hardened sea going men fear and wet themselves at it's name. It had taken 4 legendary heroes to defeat it, and one of them had dragged it hell with his own sacrifice of himself so that he world would never see it again.

Twas the Yellow Submarine. And within it, lay the cursed soul of John Lennon.

"Shit! I finally get free, and I have to meet you fuckers! I hope you all are (Expletive removed. Involved Donkeys, mothers, and a steam engine)!."

"Y'know, if it wasn't for the fact it's a hellish sub that's fused with John Lennon's soul and spent several years suffering in hell, I'd think that little voice of it's was kinda cute."

Pyros opened the hatch, cleaned out the insides with his flame, and put a tree air freshener over the dashboard. "So...Everybody aboard?"

Suijin felt the need to repeat her previous statement. "You're an ass."

"I know I am but who you are am I?" Pyros responded, with yet another smile.

"You're all asses in my book you (Expletive Removed. Involved Crackers, Bean dip, and an Elephant in Drag.)!!!" The squeaky voice of the wretched voice of John Lennon cursed.

[Truce]

He sighed, and decided to climb into the yellow submarine, but not without turning off the volume on the stereo, effectively shutting John Lennon up. "I don't think I'm in the mood for any radio today, you know?"

Buckling up in the closest seat, he was rather surprised to find that the submarine was equipped to be comfortable for even someone with wings. Then again, it was a demonic vessels, and demons loved to have all sorts of multiple appendages.

"One more thing PyrosNine...do you even know how to drive this?"

[PyrosNine]

"Some would think my general lack of knowledge on the subject would be a hindrance, but I think that those who think that think wrong. I think. I'm just going to hit buttons at random and hope for the best."

Suijin pointed to a enormous book that served as counterbalance for the ship, and was bigger than the three of them. "You're not even going to bother looking at the manual?"

"What? It's a friggin hellish ship. The first chapter probably only tells you what you should do if you want to screw yourself over."

John Lennon may still be hindered by the audio system, but that didn't stop him from turning the knob back around.

"Of course (Expletive that is most foul word you could say to a woman) I would be happy to screw you over!"

Suijin somehow found the balls of the hellsub instantaneously and kicked them as hard as she could. She may not have her powers, but there were things all women could do that were superhuman when pressed.

Pyros turned the sound down again to avoid hearing a stream of curses and screaming hearing, blasted a hole in the cave wall which filled the area with water, and closed the hatch.

With the ship submerged, Pyros punched the dashboard and the ship sailed through the hole and out into the deep.

[Truce]

Surprisingly enough, Pyros turned out to be a pretty good pilot. At the very least, any of the crashes they experienced were not nearly as bad as John Lennon's screaming-which was only made worse by the fact that Suijin kept bitching back at the haunted submarine.

Personally, Ecurt had to restrain himself from stabbing either of them-and it didn't help that Gleipnir had decided now was a good time to wake up and join John Lennon in a round of one of the Black Eyed Peas' songs. You know the one. Ecurt didn't even know how the sword was singing-as far as he could remember, only he was able to hear it.

In the end though, thanks to the Yellow Submarine being a hellship piloted by PyrosNine and therefore able to defy the laws of physics and logic, it only felt like an eternity (or a hundred) had passed by the time they had caught up to where Raiden and Mauve were, and Ecurt (who hadn't been completely informed about the whole situation) couldn't help but ask "Is it just me, or is Raiden tentacle raping Mauve?"

[Toastburner B]

Well...at least I'm moving. TB thought to himself. I guess Raiden didn't want me to be around to ruin his Kodak moment with Mauve...or whatever the heck was going on.

Still, Toastburner was not in a good situation. While he was dry to be sure, he was also blinded by the plastic back that kept the water off his papery self. To top it off, he couldn't summon his Loyal Battle Monkeys unless he could see where he was summoning them to, otherwise he might summon them into a rock or something, which would effective kill the LBM. And I've already lost three so far, he thought to himself, So now I can only summon five at a time.

So, basically, TB was a talking book in a plastic bag at the moment.

Oh well. TB sighed to himself. Someone will notice me sooner or later. They'll either help me out...or kill me. Again.

[mauve]

"Mauve Mage. It's Raiden. I know I look different, but you know me." He was staring at her oddly, as though the name was supposed to mean something to her.

She had begun to calm down a little, now that she knew she wasn’t going to die. Even so, she remained suspicious of him. Why was he keeping her alive? She had tried to electrocute him, for crying out loud. What did this Raiden want?

Raiden…? The name was familiar somehow, she realized after a moment. There was a little spark of recognition, a little window of clarity among her cloudy thoughts. She looked hard at him, trying to place where she had seen him before. The blue skin and green hair didn’t ring any bells, but still… Very familiar; she could almost picture him as a blonde. Yeah, white-blond, like an anime character. Her eyes widened as things began to slide into place.

“I do know you, don’t I?” she asked him, surprised. Tiny shreds of memory rose to the surface of her mind as the creature’s hold over her began to weaken.

“Raiden?” Her voice was full of recognition now. She frowned. "Why are you blue?" The confusing darkness was clearing, leaving her strangely tired and empty. The merman’s influence must have masked the amount of MP she used during her Rage. Now that it was gone, she could feel the loss more strongly. She swallowed forcefully.

“Did I hurt anybody?” she asked hesitantly, fearing the answer. She couldn’t remember too many of the details of her traitorous little episode, but she could recall the general gist of things. She must have been pretty far under his influence if she had used her Rage on her own party.

How did she let herself get tricked by that merman? She’d always prided herself in being able to avoid showing weakness in the presence of sexiness. Of course, this was usually because there was a little logical voice reminding her that the only reason sexy guys were looking at her was because they were thinking something along the lines of “Sheez, that kid’s a freak.” But this had been worse than anything she’d encountered before. Embarrassingly worse.

[Raiden]

With a wave of his hand, the eels released Mauve from their grasp. She had been greatly weakened, so once free of their grasp she began to float down near the bottom. With a small kick and push, Ruijin grabbed her and began to swim her toward the yellow sub.

"No, I don't think you hurt anyone. Not without lack of trying, anyway. And I'm blue because I had to borrow Suijin's Hydro Gem to keep you restricted. I don't have all my muscles or electric powers, but at least it gives me the perk of increased sexiness."

Ruijin came close to the window of the sub, knocked on it, and waved. He pointed down the tunnel, signaling that they should continue down. He kicked off away from the sub, and turned to face the forward end of the tunnel. He repositioned Mauve to his back, and wrapped her arms around his neck.

"Hold on, I'll swim us there."

With that, he began to swim swiftly through the water, his streamlined body allowing him to gracefully weave through the waves of water the rushed by him and Mauve.

[mauve]

"Wait!" Mauve protested. The forward end of the tunnel? But that meant he was taking her back to the upper cave! "I don't wanna get left behind!"

She sighed.

"Look," she said. "I know I didn't make a very good impression just now, and I know I can't be left anywhere near that mer-freak again. But I can't just give up!" She frowned, struggling for words.

"That guy, he crossed some lines," she said. "There are some things I just can't stand. They include A) taking advantage of women, B) taking advantage of me, and C) trying to use me to and hurt people."

"I know it sounds stupid, but I can't just sit back and watch. I dunno... There has to be some way..?"

[Raiden]

Ruijin stopped and began to tread water, keeping himself in place. He looked back at Mauve.

"You sure? You're kind of beat up. Plus, I don't know how you'll be able to fight. I'm not willing to put you in that danger..."

He could see she was determined, though. There probably was a way for her to help. But how? He would have given her the Hydro Gem, but there was no way for her to absorb it and became a deity. She simply wasn't created for it. Plus, he needed one of them to stay as a Deity in order to move quickly enough. But, an elemental gem could work here.

Reaching into his pants pocket, he pulled out the Lightning Gem. It glowed brilliantly in the darkness of the water. The gem contained a powerful lighting that cracked around inside the strange material. It was Raiden's Thunder God essence. It's what made him...him. He handed it back to Mauve.

"I'm not using this right now. Though you can't use it to become a deity, your skill in magic should allow you to channel some of my power out of it. Of course, you'll only be able to use electric attacks, but it'll never run out of energy, so you don't need to worry about losing MP."

Ruijin turned toward the direction the others had gone.

"Just hold on tight to it. I doubt Suijin would let me keep her Hydro Gem, and I'd like to keep my God status."

[PyrosNine]

Originally Posted by Ecurt

"Is it just me, or is Raiden tentacle raping Mauve?"

PyrosNine sighed. "Well, some guys have to get it where they can." Suddenly something banged into the windshield. Or more like a someone with 3 somethings.

Toastburner and his bag were pressed against the window, along with what remained of the LBM's. Apparently Toasty's hardback cover kept him together despite the insane speed of the Sub.

"HEY! What the fuck's on my (Expletive removed. This curse may not be suitable for children under the age of 40.) windshield? Get the shit off!" The ship whined. A windshield wiper emerged came towards Toastburner. Unfortunately, the bag got stuck on the wiper and dragged Toasty back and forth on the window. So the ship moved the wiper faster and faster, until the bag broke and a bruised toastburner floated away pages soaked.

"Well, at least he's still alive." Suijin commented.

"NOT FOR LONG, Fucker!! BWAHAHAAH!"

A torpedo of pure, unrelenting hate came out of a lowershaft and rocketed forward, and upon contact shredded Toastburner B into confetti.

"Oh my god! You killed Toasty!" Suijin cried.

"You bastard!" Pyros gave the ship a high five. "Think he'll come back as Scarkitty? I don't get anyone to play with and Aerozord's too busy with his pimping."