Smartest Character

Unless I find out that EPS was adopted and shares absolutely no genetics with King Steve, I'm gonna lean towards RM, anyone who can alter their stats to their liking and has that much wisdom about animals, monsters, and flora etc. deserves that much.

[Sever"n"steal]

Thief is the smartest f******ing character (er...sorry)

:fighter:

:thief: <Hey whats fighter doing up there!?

:fighter: I like swor...

Shut up and DIE!!!!

*STAB*

Thief: I don't think you were supposed to do that BM

Black Mage: Meh

It Would have to be either EPS or theif but i'm pretty sure if theif wanted to con EPS he could!!

EPS. She's the only remotley non-stupid villain, and a lot smarter than the majority of the light warriors. Black Mage comes in second, followed by thief. RM is pretty low, as all that stat-changification-stuff never actually works. He's clever, but not very smart.

[safetysteal]

When i first saw the thread i thought "Thief" and then I saw that EPS was a choice. Hands down EPS, she has done less stupid things than anyone else.

[reality_deviant]

HAH! There. I dared to be different and voted for Matoya. She's by far not my FAVORITE character, but, y'know, she's pretty crafty. She was somehow able to figure out all the LWs' individual weaknesses, and display them clearly on a large sign. Who among us could truly resist an offer for pie that is also evil? I, for one, cannot make that claim.

Evil Princess Sara of course.

Matoya did not make those Signs, that was EPS at Garland's Castle. However, Matoya was clever with her contracts, her poison cookies, and her organ imploding trap (Which hit fighter, and was awefully funny)

Moving on...
Fighter definitely has to be slightly intelligent if he invented Staff Chucks (The ultimate weapon) though he needs to think of a better design for sword chucks (Possibly one with handles so that he doesn't cut up his hands using them.

Anyways, Princess Sara is unbelievably smart because it's a big joke. In the actual game, she only says two things, so making her this evil mastermind is really spicing up the comic. That's why I voted for her.

[Codemonkey85]

Originally Posted by Bezo

I demand this poll be taken down until the master of sword-chucks gets his recognition as the smartiest guy in the whole universe. Sword-chucks = genius.

:fighter: Univarse. It's pronounced "univarse".

Okay, time to break it down:

Thief: Without a doubt he is number one. Sure, he's let himself slip here and there, but by far his intelligence outstrips any of the other characters (not that that's saying much). Of course, his knowledge of legalese may not quite equate to the massive amount of useless facts RM knows, but at least Thief uses his information well.

Evil Princess Sara: I put her at second because, while she has done a minimum of stupid things, she also hasn't managed to actually do anything. I mean, she's still in the castle with King Steve. Why? Anyway, she's been kidnapped several times, so she can't really be that smart.

Red Mage: I'd say Red Mage has to be the third smartest character in the bunch. I would have put him in first, since he has displayed hundreds of times that he knows of things such as quantam physics and superdimensional cubes. However, his weakness lies in the fact that, were he asked to add two and two, he'd take four hours to explain that the answer is five.

Akbar: He managed to trick countless people into buying things they don't need, and that don't generally work. Now, this could be more dishonesty than intelligence, but then why hasn't he been caught or sued? He must have some sort of contingency plan or something.

White Mage: I put her just above Black Mage, because she obviously has the brains to combat BM's constant unwanted pick up lines and such. Of course, she'd never resort to simple insults... just extreme violence. On that note, she's probably killed enough of his brain cells to widen the gap even further.

Black Mage: I really thought I'd be putting him up as number 2 (or in that range), but whaddya know? BM certainly has a high potential for intelligence, but he lets things get in his way. Namely, Fighter and White Mage. If these two variables were eliminated from his life, I guarantee he'd be happier and more successful. Or, at the very least, White Mage would be happier.

Matoya: Meh... she said it herself, she didn't have to sit around and wait for some random heros to help her get her crystal back.

Black Belt: Surprisingly enough, he was not in this poll. Anyway, I put him at the bottom because his sense of direction is so poor, he actually managed to get himself and WM around an ocean without ever approaching it, completely by accident. Then again, he gets props for the following line: "You try walking a straight line without bumping into wave functions of neighboring realities."

And now, a whole different category of "intelligence"....

Fighter: Oh brother. It is impossible by any human means to measure Fighter's intelligence (or lack thereof). It would seem that Fighter is highly afflicted with what is known as the "Gilligan Syndrome"; named for the theory that Gilligan was not stupid, but rather, he messed up the group's efforts to leave the island on purpose, realizing that they were living in paradise. Fighter's stupidity has been said (by RM) to be so massive that it folds upon itself and acts out as intelligence. Isn't that saying something? Nevertheless, he should have been in the poll.

Well, that's my rant. I'm done, you can leave now. Seriously.

[01d55]

EPS has my vote, from the list. Thief has the whole elvish pride thingy blinding him to certain things. Akbar took fake money from thief (although it was for fake memory dust) Matoya got conned by thief.

Doctor beats them all, though. He conned thief AND Astos for years, and got away with it too!