Answer to the 100 rules of being an Overlord - Page 5

Toastburner B · 01-12-2005, 10:05 AM

IIRC, aren't there like 300 rules for the evil overlord?

If not...too bad, I'm still adding the ones I came up with.

102. Never, ever, ever throw everything you have at the main villian during your "final" battle. Chances are, he'll have some sort of uber-second form, and as such, I must be prepared to battle that as well.

103. If the villian asks for mercy, ignore it. It's not very heroic, but the fact is he/she is trying to get you to lower your guard so that he/she can stab you with the dagger they have up their sleeve.

104. After you finish off the final villian, live happy ever after in an undisclosed location. This will make it someone else's problem when the villian comes back from the dead.

pochercoaster · 01-12-2005, 03:32 PM

Pshaw. *points to her sig* That's where all the REAL rules are. But these are good, too.

GrrBear · 01-12-2005, 04:41 PM

has anybody tried
105 be cute and fuzzy
106 remember to ask for a receipt

Skyshot · 01-12-2005, 06:04 PM

105 and 106 make no sense. To continue...

105. If some weakling of some kind demands to accompany me, I will not refuse them, as they will only stalk me and cause more trouble. Instead, I will accept the offer and let them find out for themselves why they shouldn't have come. (Kind of like letting little Billy stick a bobby pin in a wall socket so he'll know not to do it again.)

Rayinne · 01-12-2005, 07:09 PM

106. If a party member has the ability to communicate with the dead or other spooky supernatural forces, I will expect possession or madness to follow, and banish them from my party at the first sign of trouble. The only exception is if he or she shares an origin with me, because if I do that, I'll be creating an immensely powerful villain.

Gorefiend · 01-12-2005, 08:56 PM

107. I will buy only from authorized vendors, and from ones I trust. I will also be willing to pay the full price for everything, if haggleing is not an option. It may be more expensive, but at least my Silver Sword won't be made out of shiny tin.

108. I will attempt to balance out my stats. I will also perform several reality checks per day. That way, I won't be too stupid/naive to figure out if there is a plot by any of my party members to kill me.

109. I will not sign any contracts, or join any guilds, or have any entanglements of any kind, without first reading their text (or in the case of guilds, charter) in full, including any fine print. I will then have them checked over by my lawyer.

(can anyone guess where these come from?)

Myst · 01-14-2005, 12:46 AM

110: I will wear all black and/or leather, it will confuse the villains.
111: I will have an entire stable of cute and annoying animals, to bail me out of trouble.

Dragonsbane · 01-14-2005, 10:49 AM

112. I will have at least one incompetent, generally clueless, goof-off of a friend. He/she/it will be my most trusted companion, advisor, and sidekick, because they WILL end up saving my life.

Soldier3001 · 01-17-2005, 11:59 PM

113. If the boss begins to transform after I defeat him, I will compose myself and WILL ATTACK HIM DURING HIS TRANSFORMATION!

RagnarofBurland · 01-18-2005, 12:24 PM

114. Under no circumstances will I ever celebrate any occasion in public. This will by default lead to either to the destruction of a town/ressurection of a villian or A bad hangover after which I will have lost something of critical importance to my current predicament.

115. I will always have at least one party member with a name I can't pronounce. This will ensure that my primary foe will be similarly unable to and thus in his confused state I will take the opportunity to sneak attack him.

116. I will refer to the above mentioned party member by their initials or some nickname approved by them. I wouldn't want him getting pissed off and betraying me, now would I?

117. All Old men I encounter either have some unusually useful tale or are a very powerful wizard. As such, if the old man is a tale-spinner I will right down his tale, ask about any other recent tellings of this tale so I can get to jump on my enemies then end his life as an act of mercy because he is old/depressed/crippled. This will ensure later on no one else will hear the tale. In the case of a very powerful wizard follow along, He's probably to powerful for you to do anything about.

118. Every town has a sign near the main gate denoting its name or a person who will willingly blather the name of the town out to you. In the case that it doesn't it is probably integral to the story line becuase it was supposed to be hidden/abandon/has wonderful shops but isn't on your 'return' spell list so you'll have to walk back to it from half way across the continent later.

119. Don't touch the glowing stone. Especially if it fits conviently into that slot over on the wall or the door with the glowing runes. Chances are you'll be instigating the release/destruction of something.

120. Always bring extra healing potions/herbs/antidote/ethers/restorative items. You will run out of MP before boss at the end of a cave or end up in a cituation where your casting ability is hampered.

121. If anything ever says "Mwahahahahaha" just stab it while it is doing so.

01-12-2005, 10:05 AM	#41
Toastburner B Toasty has left the building Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Hiding...because I don't want to die. Posts: 3,936	IIRC, aren't there like 300 rules for the evil overlord? If not...too bad, I'm still adding the ones I came up with. 102. Never, ever, ever throw everything you have at the main villian during your "final" battle. Chances are, he'll have some sort of uber-second form, and as such, I must be prepared to battle that as well. 103. If the villian asks for mercy, ignore it. It's not very heroic, but the fact is he/she is trying to get you to lower your guard so that he/she can stab you with the dagger they have up their sleeve. 104. After you finish off the final villian, live happy ever after in an undisclosed location. This will make it someone else's problem when the villian comes back from the dead. __________________ I came, I saw, I got team-killed. A lot.

01-12-2005, 04:41 PM	#43
GrrBear Cuddly Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: northern arctic reigions of utah Posts: 116	has anybody tried 105 be cute and fuzzy 106 remember to ask for a receipt __________________ "yar, I am a bear" Fighter, 8-bit theatre

01-12-2005, 07:09 PM	#45
Rayinne Electromancer/Cleric Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: I have a location? News to me. Posts: 344	106. If a party member has the ability to communicate with the dead or other spooky supernatural forces, I will expect possession or madness to follow, and banish them from my party at the first sign of trouble. The only exception is if he or she shares an origin with me, because if I do that, I'll be creating an immensely powerful villain. __________________ Digital Schizophrenia - wherein I reveal vague bits of information about myself Project Cornelia status - Elves need better resource distribution! Rep is irrelevant. Your post will be assimilated.

01-12-2005, 08:56 PM	#46
Gorefiend That Guy Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: The city that doesn't sleep Posts: 1,039	107. I will buy only from authorized vendors, and from ones I trust. I will also be willing to pay the full price for everything, if haggleing is not an option. It may be more expensive, but at least my Silver Sword won't be made out of shiny tin. 108. I will attempt to balance out my stats. I will also perform several reality checks per day. That way, I won't be too stupid/naive to figure out if there is a plot by any of my party members to kill me. 109. I will not sign any contracts, or join any guilds, or have any entanglements of any kind, without first reading their text (or in the case of guilds, charter) in full, including any fine print. I will then have them checked over by my lawyer. (can anyone guess where these come from?) __________________ The world of truth has no certainty. The world of fact has no hope. "Environmental laws were not passed to protect our air and water... they were passed to get votes. Seasonal anti-smut campaigns are not conducted to rid our communities of moral rot... they are conducted to give an aura of saintliness to the office-seekers who demand them." - Frank Zappa, prelude to Joe's Garage Ever wonder THE TRUTH ABOUT BLACK HELICOPTERS?

01-18-2005, 12:24 PM	#50
RagnarofBurland Soldier of Burland Join Date: Feb 2004 Posts: 192	114. Under no circumstances will I ever celebrate any occasion in public. This will by default lead to either to the destruction of a town/ressurection of a villian or A bad hangover after which I will have lost something of critical importance to my current predicament. 115. I will always have at least one party member with a name I can't pronounce. This will ensure that my primary foe will be similarly unable to and thus in his confused state I will take the opportunity to sneak attack him. 116. I will refer to the above mentioned party member by their initials or some nickname approved by them. I wouldn't want him getting pissed off and betraying me, now would I? 117. All Old men I encounter either have some unusually useful tale or are a very powerful wizard. As such, if the old man is a tale-spinner I will right down his tale, ask about any other recent tellings of this tale so I can get to jump on my enemies then end his life as an act of mercy because he is old/depressed/crippled. This will ensure later on no one else will hear the tale. In the case of a very powerful wizard follow along, He's probably to powerful for you to do anything about. 118. Every town has a sign near the main gate denoting its name or a person who will willingly blather the name of the town out to you. In the case that it doesn't it is probably integral to the story line becuase it was supposed to be hidden/abandon/has wonderful shops but isn't on your 'return' spell list so you'll have to walk back to it from half way across the continent later. 119. Don't touch the glowing stone. Especially if it fits conviently into that slot over on the wall or the door with the glowing runes. Chances are you'll be instigating the release/destruction of something. 120. Always bring extra healing potions/herbs/antidote/ethers/restorative items. You will run out of MP before boss at the end of a cave or end up in a cituation where your casting ability is hampered. 121. If anything ever says "Mwahahahahaha" just stab it while it is doing so. __________________ *Avatar by Sneak over at Giantitp.com*

01-12-2005, 03:32 PM	#42
pochercoaster rollerpocher tycoon Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Las Vegas Posts: 1,808	Pshaw. points to her sig That's where all the REAL rules are. But these are good, too.

01-17-2005, 11:59 PM	#49
Soldier3001 Troopa Join Date: Oct 2004 Posts: 53	113. If the boss begins to transform after I defeat him, I will compose myself and WILL ATTACK HIM DURING HIS TRANSFORMATION!