NPF Avatars 5 - Another Version Of The Truth

[Flarecobra]

After about 10 minutes or so, the ground were Arhra buried me started to shift and darken. Slowly, I started to rise up out of the ground. "Owwwww....What the hell hit me?" I said, shaking my head to clear it. Then looking at myself, I only had one thing to say. "Ew..I'm all muddy."

I got myself out from the ground, and looked myself over. My slimegirl body had chucks of dirt all in me, which kinda upset me. Taking a moment to figure out how I was going to clean myself out, I then thought about just forcing it out from inside me. Consentrating hard on it, I felt the mud in me slowly move to the outside. It took a while, but I managed to get it out of me. "Finally..." I said, grabbing my armor and finding a place to get dressed, when suddonly a large chunk of debris landed right in front of me. "That works." I said, and quickly started to dress after shifting back to human form.

[Red Mage Black]

Last thing Black knew was he had been teleported out of his bed and was taken control of by his shard companion. Next thing he knew, he was sitting on top of the Megazord... thing... inside a giant head. "You and your damn Power Rangers fantasies." He shouted down below. "Why do you have to project them on to us? Oh well, guess I'm in for the long run."

[PyrosNine]

Japanese-English Emo-World-Peas-Bot: Hell took the Doom Cannon in the face and stumbled back, crushing more than a few Gaians underfoot as he did so, but recovered suitably, it's eyes glowing a bit brighter.

In truth, the blast had lifted it's sordid spirits for a bit, as for a moment, it's physical pain was equal or greater than the rotting pain within, for once there was a pleasant moment spent with things other than inner demons.

The fan proceeded to Pyros's sandwich.

"ACK! NOoooo!! I had been waiting on that sandwich, like for the last week or so in realtime!" Pyros sobbed. Then Mime blew up, followed by Cendy. "Noooo! Mime! Well crap! And I had planned to have my zord's fusion with Ecurt's considered a legal binding! How dare he unknowingly dodge that! At least my Ipod's cool!"

"Grrr! This is aint no planet of no apes, huh? I beg to differ! WITH PREJUDICE!" Pyros roared, and hit the button marked "Nuttin' but mammals", right next to "Discovery Channel".

Japanese-English Emo-World-Peas-Bot: Hell!'s neon laser eyes turned into bright high beams, and his chest opened up into a grand stage, with two ape-men standing upon it in fine suits. An audience emerged from the seats comprised of every forumite who had been in AVA and left or was missing for this adventure, all of Newb's dead alternate selves, and the Lawyer-ninjas who were there to Audit Pyros's hidden giant robot assets as soon as possible.

Japanese-English Emo-World-Peas-Bot: Hell's hands went for the guitar, and played a key, which the two Apes caught tune by. After a cough, they began:

"Doctor ZAIIIiUUUUUSSS!"

A roar of applause from the crowd, and the two bowed, opening into the production.

A shoulderpad opened up, and from it a hairy man was shot, with an Ape-woman clinging to his leg.

Another spot light emerged to shine on the other shoulder, where an Ape-man in army clothes stood pointing.

"Help! The human's about to escape!"

The hairy man landed on the tip of Japanese-English Emo-World-Peas-Bot: Hell!'s guitar, and kicked off the ape-woman on his leg.

"Get your paws off me, you dirty ape!" He cried, with a strong, deep voice.

Another ape-man emerged on Japanese-English Emo-World-Peas-Bot: Hell!'s head, recoiling in shock.

"Gasp! He can talk!"

A chorus emerged on the stage, chanting in unison:

Orangutans: He can talk! He can talk! He can talk!
He can talk! He can talk! He can talk!

With a majestic sweep of his feet and a quick prop pull of a megaphone, the hairy man aimed for Rei Classic.

"And I can SIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNGGGGGG!" He bellowed into the megaphone, with the sound being further boosted by Japanese-English Emo-World-Peas-Bot:Hell!'s digital surround sound system, and another powerful wave of sound erupted at Rei Classic.

The apewoman was frantic, clinging to the edge of the guitar, and with an "oooooh!", she sang:

"Help me, Dr. Zaius!"

The chorus began lively, as a podium arose from the stage, revealing none other than Dr. Zaius, as an exquisite laser show filled the sky above Japanese-English Emo-World-Peas-Bot:Hell!.

Of course, these were more than just laser lights, but actual deadly lasers o'doom which crisscrossed unpredictably in the sky, providing an attack and defense for the giant bot. Rei would find staying still a bit difficult.

The chorus continued:

Chorus: Dr. Zaius! Dr. Zaius!
Dr. Zaius! Dr. Zaius!
Dr. Zaius! Dr. Zaius!
O, Dr. Zaiiiiuusssssss!"

[POS Industries]

Rei Classic found staying still to be far easier than she would have preferred, actually.

A split second before she could launch into another assault on Pyros' mech, she suddenly found herself bound in place at the wrist by a very large and weighty metallic rubber chicken.

"Uh... buh...?" was all she could utter before being struck by the blast of Pyros' energy attack. At the same moment, in a cinematically exciting scene, Rei Hermes was caught in the explosion of the KyuubiZord, Rei Ares was struck down by the combined attacks of IC, Mauve, and Ecurt, Rei Aphrodite was torn asunder by Team Arhriyara, and Rei Zeus was proposed to by Arhra Two.

"NOOOOO!!!!"

"REI CLASSIC!!!!!"

"KYAAAA!!!!"

"Omigosh YES!! I will marry you! Hee hee, I've imagined this moment my whole life and I can't believe it's happening now? Am I blushing? Oh my gosh, I'm blushing aren't I? Wow, this is amazing! Yes! I love you!"

Classic hit the ground and laid motionless for a moment before slowly crawling to her feet, the damage to her body being quite evident as she weakly tried to pry the chicken shackle from her wrist. "Is everyone else okay.... guys?"

"R-Rei... Claszz--sic? I-I-I-<bzzzt>-I.... am h-herezzzzz......."

"I think we're all... Well, we're still alive.... for now," the head and torso of Ares responded as Classic stared aghast at the shredded remnants of Aphrodite.

"You guys can't die.... You can't!" Classic cried out, falling back down to her knees, "I can't do this without you....."

"There's still a chance," Hermes spoke up, laying motionless on her side, her legs blown apart from the KyuubiZord explosion, "We could give you all of our energy, sending your artificial Kurosen power generator into a sort of overdrive. It would regenerate the damage to your body and give you unparalleled electromagnetic control abilities, at least temporarily...."

"What? But... I can't! You'll all die!"

"We're all going to die anyway, chowderhead! At least this way you have a fighting chance!" Ares growled, channeling her energy through a beam of red light into the brooch on Classic's chest, "Now fight!"

"It'szzz Th-th-the.... on-ly way...." Aphrodite buzzed, projecting a similar golden transfer beam.

Hermes followed suit with her own blue beam, "The fate of the world is in your hands, Rei...."

"So, did you have any ideas for a date? Because I was thinking, and I know it's totally cliche, but I was thinking of going for a spring wedding, because--Oh, huh? Energy transfer?" Zeus turned her attention momentarily away from her new fiance to fire off a green energy beam of her own to Classic before going back to her big girly freak out, "Sure, here ya go. Anyway, I guess we'll have to have the wedding in Canada because, you know, two girls and all, but I'm sure it'll still be great!"

"W-wait.... Aren't I supposzzed to... b-b-be the lovesszzstruck f-flake.....?

Her cup running over with the energy of her fallen comrades, Rei's body was quickly repaired by her repair nanite system, but the little android girl couldn't help but feel overwhelmed by this newfound power.

"My... My body can't handle this power!" she breathed, looking at her hands as electricity arced and crackled around them, "The energy frequencies are all slightly out of sync.... Need to reroute them into something quickly....."

"Rei! Channel it into your shield system!" the nearly-forgotten crystalline shard Anima called out from her position at Rei's feet, where she stood in the inexplicable form of a talking housecat, "They're forming up a big giant robot! Fight fire with fire!"

"Right! And I think I know just what to do! Watch this! REI OVERDRIVE FORM.... ENGAGE!!"

Eyes glowing red, Rei's body was suddenly enveloped in a bright white light, which itself began to expand around her to gargantuan size. The android's shield system had formed an electromagnetic energy body with all the quickness and dexterity of the original, but with an obvious proportionate gain in strength and attack power.

"Yes, I think this should just about do it," Rei laughed, looking over this new form before catching sight of TEN, who was off doing something or other. "Hmm, I think you'll do for a quick test! DOUBLE DOOM CANNON..... BANG BANG!!"

Two balls of energy quickly charged up on the tips of each of her massive index fingers before being fired off in a handgun motion at TEN, who was almost instantaneously enveloped in the combined blast. The dust and light from the explosion faded, revealing nothing where he once stood.

"Okeedokee, that went well. Who's next?"

[PyrosNine]

PyrosNine launched Dr. Ziaus and his kamikaze monkeys at the gargantuan shielded figure, only to see them bounce of harmlessly. Obviously, the scale of war had elevated.

"Hooo snap! B*ch done gone big time on us fools! WE gots to gets her beat down! NPF Voltrozords (in space)! We need to work together, and form the The MegaMasterVoltroGZord for great justice!"

Japanese-English Emo-World-Peas-Bot: Hell began to shift around (fleshily) again, until it formed larger, upper chest like mass.

"Upper torso! Everyone else, call in! And the first person who says they're nuts gets a nice stay in Arkham!"

[Bailey]

The dust swirled away, and Amalgam ran over to see what could be done.

************

TEN-tacular clutched his head. Last thing he remembered was getting hit by that new super-weapon. Must mean he had REI's form now, or something close to it. Eyes seemed not to want to open yet... did he hear something?

"Oh come on, you could obviously tell that Arthur and Ford had some feelings for each other!"

EXPLETIVE. He was at a Hitchhiker's convention.

And that was how TEN met his end.

*******************

Where TEN O'Clock had been standing a pillar of light shot straight up, then flailed, grabbing Amalgam who seemed too slow to flee. The pillar of light shot off in search of the rest of the spawn of TEN.

[TheBlindMime]

Death was in a way, nothingness, so Death rather enjoyed the spectacle of Pedros Nilihelm. Yet it was the filling boats headed for hades which brought Death the most joy, those damned Gaians had escaped Death for too long in this, their permanent purgatory. How wonderful it was to finally have them. Only slightly moreso then the collection of a certain blind assassin who'd narrowly escaped Death often enough for the two of them to become familiar.

Death hated that, when there was familiarity to someone it made Death feel, substantial. Death preferred being insubstantial, there was a feeling of omniprescence that came along with it, something that Death truly... loved. Reaching into the rubble Death grabbed hold of the corpse -that is what remained of it after the terrific explosion- and pulled free the soul of his friend/nemesis. "Hello, it was quite good of you to-", Death had been smiling boldy -as bold as death could smile- only to have that feeling rise up again, that substantial feeling.

The one that told Death that The BlindMime had escaped again.

****

Some distance away from the grim scene, a picture wafted higher and higher into the air only to be sucked into the ventilation system of Japanese-English Emo-World-Peas-Bot: Hell! The photo drifted deeper inwards eventually ending up in the cockpit of the robot, as if fate wished to give the fire god a very flammable image of his friend, who had just exploded. Or so Pyros would have thought! Without warning the photo exploded into a burst of noxious fumes, revealing plushie TBM who landed casually on the control panel (a little to close to the self-destruct for any real sense of comfort), "Whew, that was a close one. Hey Pyros." He waved, "Oh right, its me, TBM, the real one, not the plushie... well I'm in the plushies body but its really me. It's kind of hard to explain... have you heard of theft?"

TBM (in plushie body) moved towards the viewscreen, "BOY IT SURE WOULD HAVE BEEN NICE TO HAVE ONE OF THESE!" He said it obnoxiously loudly, for reasons that should be apparent. Then taking a closer inspection of what he saw he was a little confused, "You guys have like 6 heads and torso's out there!" (2 torso's, 1 head) "Didn't you guys practice this at all beforehand?"

****

Meanwhile, in the realm of spirits, Death watched on with plushie TBM soul floating eerily next to him. "That jerk stole my body, all my candy was on that body." Plushie TBM said.

"That jerk should be dead, and the candy was fake." Death replied matter-of-factly.

"You know I didn't even know I had a soul in that little plushie body."

"You didn't its an illusion, a pretty good one too. Why if I weren't so familiar with..." Death stopped, an eager smile -for Death anyhow- appeared. "Now I have you my precious little mime."

"What? What are you talking about?" Plushie TBM recoiled, his soul slowly drifting back from the spectre.

"If I take you to Hades, no one will know that he is missing. I can finally have some peace. Come little one." A red-orange tear began beneath them, opening a portal to the realm of the dead where the blue portal remained. Tossing the 'real' TBM's soul in casually brought great joy to Death, if Death was no longer hunting TBM then TBM wouldn't be familiar with Death and if no one was familiar with Death then.... insubstantial

The TBM plushie's curse could be heard through the portal but only barely, "I'll get you TBM if its the last thing I-", the portal closed suddenly after Death stepped through and created a new red portal so that there would be no escape.

TBM would have been frightened by the ominous plushie based threat if there weren't so many other lost souls waiting for a chance to return and kill him. Its amazing how many enemies one blind mime can have.

[PyrosNine]

PYros noticed someone else had claimed the upper torso. "Hey! I'm supposed to be the upper torso! Or the head. Let me read up on the arpy log! Fine then! I shall be the head!" Upon noticing that scurvy dog, Red Mage Black, had taken the form of the head, ignoring (while Pyros had forgotten it too) this:

Originally Posted by Pyros

I call dibs on being the head. You can argue amongst yourselves who gets to be the crotch rocket.

.

So therefore, Pyros knew there could only be one solution. Two headed Megazord, with a big torso!

The large, metally metal of Pyros's zord formed the lower torso (just above the nuts), and the second head plopped down beside Red Mage Black. Docked in, Pyros briefly sent a message of doom to the two jump the gunners.

"You two are TOTALLY going to be TG'ed when this is over. Or trapped in a secret science facility with an Insane AI and a portal gun. Whichever comes first."

"Yay MIME! I knew you'd come back! They all come back...eventually. Except, y'know, the ones in the ditches in Guam."

Pyros hugged the tiny mimey plushie.

"Here, come meet my servant, the non-crazed and heavily drugged fan! She killed Lennon! Twice! Furthermore, she's dressed as R. Dorothy!"

"Nice to meet you mister mime. I was molested by a mime once. In Britain." she said monotonely.

"Isn't she luvverly? However, as a newly entered member of my crew, you have to be put to work like the rest of my sla-friends. Isn't that right guys?"

"[expletive removed: Most versatile word in english language!] you and your [expletive removed: Still selling adspace here!] Mime friend, I'm [when you wish upon a star, there's no difference who you are] gonna get you good!"

"MIMES GO GOOD WITH NEW IDEA! WE MAKE MUSIC AND COLOR...WITHOUT MUSIC AND COLOR! I VOTE WE DO SO! JOOHHHHNNYYYY? JOOHHHHHNNNYYY? WHAT YOU THINK?"

"Kill me mates! Kill meeeee!!! [expletive]!"

With a flick of a wrist, a tiny treadmill appeared on Pyros's desk, complete with cheese on a string attached to it.

"Now, join up with my MegaMasterVoltroGZord, and together, we shall smite all things! Especially the bad ones! Maybe that amplified Rei over there! Especially since she's marrying Arhra!" Pyros said as he plopped mime on the treadmill.

"Also, don't worry. Once this is over, I can get you a neato non-plushie body in a jiffy!"

[TheBlindMime]

An alluring yellow trail of scented cheese reached TBM's plush nose, "Sharp chedder with a hint of jalapeno's.... eck....." TBM struggled to contain himself as his moustache (which you would swear had never ever been there before) twisted and split, his eyes began to swirl with red in a clearly crazed pattern and his teeth clattered loudly. "CHHEEEESSSSEEE!!!!"

He sped off like a certain rescue ranger on a mission, a mission for zords, for battle but most importantly, for cheese. His legs pumped frantically powering whatever inane function the treadmill served, and as plushies had no muscles, he would never tire, never leave and never give up.

The cheese would be his.

[Inbred Chocobo]

So now everyone was fusing their zords together to make a giant fight robot. Excellent. IC immediately veered course towards the fusing robots. "Man does that sound dirty." IC said to himself as his zord flew towards the multi-headed horrid creation.

Then something dawned on IC. He never actually fused a zord together with other people. And the fact that he tore out the speakers of the system so that the zord couldn't tell him how to do it. "Just have to wing it I guess." IC said to no one as he flew towards the MegaMasterVoltroGZord.

"I guess if I just get close enough, the thing will do it." IC spoke to himself. Boy he needed to stop doing that. Those that had already joined with the Zord could only stare in horror as IC picked up speed as he approached the thing. "Here goes nothing." IC said as he closed in with the fusion.

Except his zord didn't do any fusing. He suddenly found his zord slamming into the contraption, the long neck of his zord going through the whole thing and out of the other side, as the rest of his zord was on the original side, its engines now being slowed down thanks to IC's somewhat quick thinking. "Okay... that didn't work."

Then IC tried to reverse, except flying vehicles don't have reverse. "Um... guys. I'm kind of stuck." IC spoke up in the comm, finally finding the bloody thing.