Magical Landry Sign-Up Part Deux - The Landrying!

[DanteFalcon]

Garter Snakes can't fully survive on them but earthworms can supplement their diet and aren't that hard to put in a jar of dirt that you carry in your bag.

[Riin Whitewind]

I think it's swell that your character is interested in snakes, and you want him to have one as a pet. But I hope you put more research into having them than reading the wikipedia page on Thamnophis.

Unless your snake is very young (and if it is part of the Veterinary Club, it won't be) snakes are fed once a week, maybe twice if the first mouse was runty.

Snakes also don't 'snack', which is what I believe your character is suggesting.

Feeding garter snakes multiple times a day, or even every day, is actively harmful to it. Overfeeding will drastically shorten its lifespan.

What you are defending is a minor detail of your character's spell. Removing it doesn't compromise the spell.

[DanteFalcon]

School has cut into my study time for this so I will admit to not having gotten much farther than a brief overview, however the original thought was that it would be a young snake (it seems odd to me that they wouldn't start you with a baby but that would solve the issue) and since I'm in Wilderness Survival if I went out to the forest and suddenly my pet snake is there (Although again adult snake ignores this problem) then yeah I'd need to feed it.

Please don't assume I'm taking this lightly Riin and if you are concerned about my study habits for this character then I'd appreciate a PM next time instead of being called out on the public forum.

[Bard The 5th LW]

She isn't trying to 'call you out' Dante, she's just trying to help you a bit. It is nothing to take offense over.

[Aldurin]

Ok, here's Naomi's upgrade info, with details on her club order of focus and two spell ideas.

Club Order of Focus:

1. Fitness - This club almost feels like her calling, having taken to the knowledge on how to stay healthy very well and making very good use of it. She's stayed in excellent shape and has even managed to pick up on any medical lessons that she was too squeamish to focus on in veterinary, probably because the positive attitude she has for the course helps her resist that tendency.

2. Computer - She's adapted much better than she expected to the concepts with computers, and she's had very few problems that have stumped her.

3. Meditation - As much as Naomi likes the class, the demand to have a still mind and body at the same time is a learning curve for her, and either ends up fidgeting or being mentally anguished by the urge to fidget. She also finds the weird Buddhist stuff off-putting, though she can't really pinpoint why.

4. Veterinary - Turns out Naomi is very squeamish, and even hearing about certain functions or symptoms has made her too queasy to focus on the lessons. She's picked up some useful knowledge on some injuries and diseases, but her memory is a blur for any lecture about the more severe and graphic cases. She's picked a hedgehog as her pet because it looked cute as hell when she looked it up and she didn't see anything about them that was particularly disgusting.

Proposed Spells:

Focus Amplifier, Yellow Elemental:
In attempt to help her deal with her problems with the Meditation and Veterinary clubs, Naomi has developed a spell that dulls effects like nausea, pain, itches and other distracting feelings. This allows her to focus better on the task at hand, and withstand mitigating influences on her mind. Will drains faster the stronger the suppressed effect is.

Note Buddy, _ Elemental:
In attempt to work with the difficulties in note-taking (whether it's from distractions or circumstances where she shouldn't have note-making materials out) she's enchanted her cell phone so that when she is in a spot where she wants to make note of something she hears or reads, it will create a text document with a shortened version of what is being said nearby, and will do the same if the camera on the phone is pointed at pre-existing text (whether on a blackboard, computer screen or book). Has a very small will drain when this effect is active.

[Teal Mage]

Hello again everyone! I would like to begin by saying my surgery has been declared a success. Sorry about the delay, but recovering from being cut open isn't easy. That said, it has given me more time to think about this game and I have a few announcements to make. The first: The interest presented in this game has vastly exceeded my expectations.

Unfortunately, that does mean I'll need to be even more selective about the characters and players I allow into the game. Since I essentially stand to gain double my current compliment of players, players who can't pull their own weight or represent problems will need to be removed, or the game will suffer.

In light of that, Relm I'm afraid this isn't going to work. You don't appear to be learning, and are already on your last warning. I have no doubt that you'll use this up before long, so, I'm ending the character creation process for you now. Thank you for your interest.

Dante, I've been watching your behaviour on the forums and the pad quite carefully for a while now, and I don't believe this game is a good fit for you. Thank you for your interest, but this is as far as you'll go in character creation.

That done, I would like to explain how I classify and evaluate characters. There are, essentially, three builds available for Awakened characters at the start of the game – Magic-focus, Martial-focus and Hybrid. Blacks haven't been terribly popular up until now, but they're evaluated differently, for those that are curious.

In any event, Magic-Focus characters are basically the mages of the setting. They have very little martial ability, but a broad magical education and a large selection of starting spells (only they can hit 7, before club-levels). They also have the easiest time developing new spells (strong education) and the best chance of a successful free-cast. They do suck at fighting though, so when their Will hits zero, they're in trouble.

Martial Focuses are basically their opposite. They have little-to-no magical training (they're generally limited to self-targeting and simple Yellow spells) and therefore, have a fair amount of limitations learning new spells, and free-casting. Still, they're the best fighters out of the three – which basically translates to them being stronger, faster and just, generally, more capable in melee than the other two. Martial Focuses have, at the most, 5 spells before club-levels.

Hybrids fall between Magic and Martial-focuses (most lean one way or the other). They have a fair degree of both magic and martial training – though neither are as good at Martial or Magic Focuses at their particular thing, they can usually compete with either. Their degree of magical training is demonstrated in their spell list, which means they've an easier time free-casting and learning spells than Martial-focuses (provided these spells relate to pre-existing abilities), but have more less options than Magic-focuses. Hybrids, like Martial focuses, start with 5 spells before club-levels. Their spells can be more complex (IE: Not just Yellow) than Martial Focuses, though.

Alright, reviews. Order: Rhiya, Red, Aldurin, Zu, Lilly.

Rhiya:

Guardians of the House is approved. Fits fine. Both of your new spells need minor tweaks, but before I do more spell commentary, I'd like to note that, since Emme's a hybrid (good at martial combat and magic), seven spells to start is gonna be too much. Unless you wanna remove most of her martial fighting skills, five's the number that you'll be working with (pre-club levels, anyway). So, to help with deciding which spells to drop, here's a few new comments:

Upon a week's reflection, Helping Hand is too adaptable and complicated in its current iteration. If you want to keep it, it would be treated as a Flash Action - a different spell would be needed to lift something or wipe something down, etc. It might develop into an interesting specialization for Emme, but I don’t see this worth the spell slot initially. Nitpicker's Eyes is potentially nice, depending on the mechanic used for it, since that gives Emme more magical education to draw on for later skill-development. I would note that the ability seems a little like an extra for Emme right now and might not be worth the slot. Still, with a few clarification tweaks, it would be fine to keep.

I would recommend the Perception Surge over the other two, though, since it has the most direct combat applications. Well, if you make this a Surge and not a Mode-Shift, that is. The text of the ability suggests that the effect is sustained (Mode-Shift), which would come with the an 'inability to move while spell is active' drawback (she has to focus on watching her target to keep it working). That said, the Mode-Shift would would be easier on Emme's body to use than the Surge. The Surge, as implied, would active for an instant, and make Emme's ability to detect details extraordinarily great for that moment. The overall effect would be stronger than the Mode-Shift and could be activated while she's fighting for quick bursts of insight, but would be more taxing on her body (could damage her eyes if used too much). The Surge is also more expensive than the Mode-Shift (on a per-turn basis).

Regardless of your choice, you'll need to cut back on at least two of your spells. Club-levels come next.

Oh, and congrats, the Inconspicuous Maid spell is probably the strongest pseudo-invisible technique in the game, right now. The spell requires so many factors to activate (clothing, posture and intent), that the only way to detect Emme while the ability is active is to look for a Maid, while being suspicious of said Maid. The illusion doesn't work properly if Emme stops playing her part right, unfortunately (if she gets flustered or makes hurried motions, she might be noticed, for instance).

Red:

Originally Posted by Red Mage Black

Okay, so I may try something like hybridization later, when it's a little more effective than being a jack of all trades with crappy magic and melee.

I have no idea what this means. To be clear, what build are you aiming for with Nasir? Magic Focus, Martial Focus or Hybrid?

Originally Posted by Red Mage Black

Clarified which one was from a blessing on his family, which one he uses the mark for and which ones he learned during priest training that the other priests of his tribe could learn. Though I'm sure they'd allow some leeway for spells if it benefited the tribe as a whole.

Right, I see I've complicated things too much. I'll fix that now: Nasir's Tribe is made of Humans not God-Bloods (we're dropping the family-specific blessings). Most rely on Old magic, Spirit magic or are the Priests of Gods. As Nasir is the Bearer of the Brand, the last option is out of his reach, but he can be trained in Old magic and/or Spirit magic. Nasir's family might still specialize in Weather and Wind magic, but this isn't an inborn talent or affinity. Its more of a tradition.

Anyway, Old magic either works off an incantation, or (in Nasir's case), an object covered with his tribe's Spell Script. For each option below, you'll need to decide if you want it to work based on an incantation, or an object. In the case of the latter option, you'll need to designate the object as well - each spell can only works with one object at Char. Gen. Objects, generally, do not expire when used.

Spirit magic is a wholly different kettle of fish. If I think it's a better route to accomplishing whatever the spell is after, I'll mention it. None of your present abilities strike me as suitable for this mechanic, though.

Healing Heart works fine, so does Staff Fighting Mastery. Warding off the Cold will either work as a Mode-Shift, or something that requires a fair Will Investment to activate. The latter option also requires him to touch the Brand to activate it. Decide which version you want, and we're good.

For Deny the Infidel, the spell'll work by creating a barrier of repelling force around Nasir. May not work on piercing attacks (not sure yet). To activate it, Nasir needs to stop moving and grip an object covered in the relevant spell-script. The Barrier fails if Nasir's focus is disrupted, he stops adding Will to the object, or he lets go of it. Fair Will drain, increases while opposing attacks. He can't breath while the barrier is up (it repels the air around him).

I suppose this could work with an incantation too, but it wouldn't be as useful.

Power of the Wind is a little more complicated. You're either looking at what amounts to a Wind-Beam (narrow blast of wind, about the size of his palm, mid-long range) which deals blunt damage. Best way to work that would be a short, one sentence, incantation with a gesture to direct the Beam, or to put Will into an object covered with his tribe's spell script, while touching it directly, and aiming it at the target. Both are Old Magic.

The alternative would be a blast of gale-force wind at melee-range (no direct damage, but might knock someone down to stagger them), directed in front of him. Again, Old Magic works best. Either touch an object covered with his tribe's spell script (no gesture required) and add Will, or shout a single word incantation. Your call.

Praise the Strong targets other people – it doesn't make sense for him to have kept this over the course of his two-year journey. Any battles he got in would be solo. Steady Footing is…a bit odd. It won't work well as a Yellow technique (improving your sense of balance won't help enough). Right now, it covers too many possible terrains for me to come up with a good mechanic to make it work – narrow down which difficult terrain you want this spell to work with, and I'll see what I can do.

Originally Posted by Red Mage Black

Yeah... I guess regular MA would be good then? I chose Bojutsu because staff fighting is mostly defensive, which I at least thought was fitting for the Staff Fighting Mastery spell slot.

MMA is more brawling than anything else. Really aggressive, no weapon-training involved. Meditation is the closest you'll get to a defensive weapon class and you already have it. I think picking a different club would be best.

Aldurin:

Right, Electronic Override's been bothering me for a while. Right now, it does too many things - they're very simple things, in theory, but in practice, a single spell to move a switch back and forth doesn't work. You'll need to divide it into a set of paired spells. Both release a gentle pulse of energy within an electrical device, closing or opening all the switches within it (depending on which spells she uses). They still require physical contact. That brings your pre-club level spells to five and moves Naomi, firmly, into Hybrid territory.

Anyway, moving onto your new spells.

Focus Amplifier, does too much right now. I tried to find a way to work it, but its not something the system can manage. Pick one thing for this spell to counter (pain, stray thoughts or nausea) and we'll go from there. I do wanna note that stray thought cancelling is generally a bad idea - its still pretty dangerous to tunnel-vision like that. Regardless, all the effects are within her educational background.

Note Buddy...is pretty weird. What part of this is magical? Not sure I get what you’re going for, really. Wouldn't a camera or tape-recorder work just as well?

Zu:

Alright, the biggest issue with Cassie is the circumstances of her Awakening. Her Borrowed Sight spell is far too overt for a Black Spell. A Black type spell should not be noticeable by the user and easily explainable to those around them – this spell doesn't satisfy either condition. Only way this could work is if she had demon blood in her/was a demon which had sight-stealing abilities. Otherwise, Borrowed Sight needs to be an Awakened technique, not instinctive. A more appropriate Black ability would be something that subtly augments another of her senses, to allow her to cope, in some measure, with her blindness.

For simplicity's sake though, I would just drop the part of her backstory where she instinctively stole someone's sight. Its cleaner to just have her parents Awaken her as early as possible (thirteen's a good number). Given her condition, provided she didn't do anything too miraculous, the Guilds wouldn't have strong objections to teaching her magic in order to help her cope with blindness.

That said, are you sure you want to play a blind girl? I want to offer this caution, disabilities are very serious things in Landry. You're setting Cassie up with a massive disadvantage which magic can help mitigate, but can not completely nullify. For instance, she won't be able to see auras like the other characters (would need a spell to help). Different, but still relevant, note is that healing her eyes won't be easy either – short of actually growing proper, working, eyes for her (by no means is this easy), not much'll do it.

Basically, think carefully about this decision. What does being blind add to this character? Is there a way to get to this result without the disadvantage represented by playing a blind girl? There's at least one way to work growing up as a blind girl, before a miraculous rebirth event. So, yeah, think carefully. I've no issue with it if you're sure, but I want you to understand the constraints this represents.

Oh, and I'd suggest dropping the part about her late enrollment. Her relationships won't develop overnight, you know. Plus, club-levels are nice.

Lilly:

Alright, last but not least, Robyn and her backstory. Most of this is going to be me addressing some misinterpretations you've made, to put you on the right track.

Originally Posted by Lillium

Amazingly, her parents are not split up. Her father is a hard working Seattle sales man... that bounces around different sorts of jobs every six to eighteen months but somehow makes ends meet. Her mother has been between mentally unstable and constantly drunk as long as she can remember, holding a job at somewhere like a laundry mat or dry cleaner's on off occasions. Mom and Dad fought when she was young, albeit behind a closed door where they thought no children could hear. Dad put on a happy face around the kids. Mom looked sour and left the house unexplained at nights.

Small format point to begin with. This is Robyn's bio. Knowing that her family-life isn't sunny is directly relevant to her, a lot of this information isn't. I recommend reorganizing the early section of this backstory and moving details only relevant to her parents to short descriptive bios in the Relationship section. It'll help make Robyn's backstory easier to reference, while cutting down on the necessary details.

Originally Posted by Lillium

Robyn's mom is clearly a total looser. Or so she thought, until a year ago on her birthday when her father realized she had inherited her mother's gift.

Everyone has magic, it isn't a gift, nor can talent with it be inherited. Demonic powers can be inherited (their taint transfers through blood), but the basic ability to perform magic is something every human can do if instructed properly.

Originally Posted by Lillium

Her mother can create and mend things. She can talk to animals... and plants, maybe more.

Unless her mother and Robyn are demons, there isn't a reason for either of them to be limited in what their powers can do. Some human magicians do choose to specialize after a time, but there is nothing forcing them to follow a theme. Just wanna be clear there.

Originally Posted by Lillium

But to her father who can't do anything impressive, an apple and orange are both fruit.

Knowing about magic and not practicing it, eh? Alright, I have no particular issue with that, I suppose. Still, I would like to know why her dad hasn't pursued it at all, if he's been Awakened? Magic can be pretty useful for self-defense, if nothing else.

Originally Posted by Lillium

…Mom's problems come from an inability to deal with some magic related things, and many nights she spent "missing" were dealing with some other magic things that could never be explained to the children. And still have not been fully explained to Robyn.

So, what is it her mom was doing? That Robyn doesn't know is fine, but as DM, I do need to know.

Originally Posted by Lillium

There had always been oddities, like in third grade when she told Mrs Mellois that the classroom plants said Benny had tried to poison them with soda during his week to water them. And a year later when Mr Finch caught her trying to release the class pet because "She said she needed to be free!"

Right, this is probably one of the larger problems with this bio. Black Magic doesn't develop just because – it develops in response to a problem which the character frequency faces. Right now, there isn't a reason for her to develop these abilities, so this part really doesn't work. Additionally, this manifestation of Black magic is pretty overt (she notices it, even if it's explainable) – both abilities outlined here should be far more subtle.

I do want to note that Black magic doesn't usually become well-developed this quickly in a young child, either. Missed this detail in the Primer, sorry. Most human children raised in mainstream society can't be Awakened until they turn 12-ish.

Originally Posted by Lillium

With the new knowledge of her abilities, and the absence of complaints about oddities from the school, not to mention the non-dangerous nature of her abilities, her parents assumed no major changes would need to be made to her life.

Clarification request: Robyn's school doesn't care about any of the odd qualities she displays, because they're things that any little kid would do? Do her parents know?

Originally Posted by Lillium

She has a "gift" for learning languages - directly tied into her communication powers*. When she was 5 a program was started up for 3rd and 4th year high school Spanish students to come to the kindergarden classes and teach rudimentary Spanish to the children. By the end of the semester she had mastered almost as much of the language as the students that had come to teach it. Impressed, she was encouraged by the school to continue…

Okay, when Black magic develops to enhance a skill, the skill has to be there before the magic does. It also needs a reason to develop (she has to be interested in the subject, or need to do well in it). This paragraph implies the reverse happened – her magic developed first, and her interest in the subject followed. You'll need to fix that, somehow.

Originally Posted by Lillium

Hindi was never a language she learned. So when her mother attended a fundraiser held by the school she was shocked to learn that her daugher had been not only a constant companion to the recent exchange student from India, but a translator in a few situations. The next morning she was unenrolled from the public school, and her mother tracked down a contact to get her daughter enrolled in a proper school for the "gifted".

Uh, this doesn't seem like a big deal? At this point in the story, it's well established that Robyn has a talent for learning languages. Most people would assume she studied Hindi on her own - it's not really something any one would care about, as far as I can tell.

Originally Posted by Lillium

Fortunately, Prof Landry seems to have had some space for a new transfer!

Just a note, new PCs probably won't begin in Professor Landry's class. I'll work out their circumstances of joining – your job is just to figure out how your character got to Amaranth.

Also: Is Robyn Awakened, or a Black? It isn't mentioned in the bio, but is definitely relevant.

Different Point: Robyn's abilities seem to follow a very definite theme. Are you sure you wouldn't prefer her being a Non-Human? I can't think of a mythological creature which has a purview that covers everything that Robyn's done in this bio (I suppose a Psychic or a Mutant gets closest?), but if you can, it would help justify the way her powers developed. Even Black Demonic powers follow the themes of their tainted Will. Though, the main obstacle to her powers would still be there - they need to develop for a reason.

Anyway, I believe that's the end of this post! How wonderful.

[DanteFalcon]

I am somewhat disappointed to hear that but I understand.

Enjoy everyone!

[Zoological Uncertainty]

Originally Posted by Teal Mage

Zu:

Alright, the biggest issue with Cassie is the circumstances of her Awakening. Her Borrowed Sight spell is far too overt for a Black Spell. A Black type spell should not be noticeable by the user and easily explainable to those around them – this spell doesn't satisfy either condition. Only way this could work is if she had demon blood in her/was a demon which had sight-stealing abilities. Otherwise, Borrowed Sight needs to be an Awakened technique, not instinctive. A more appropriate Black ability would be something that subtly augments another of her senses, to allow her to cope, in some measure, with her blindness.

For simplicity's sake though, I would just drop the part of her backstory where she instinctively stole someone's sight. Its cleaner to just have her parents Awaken her as early as possible (thirteen's a good number). Given her condition, provided she didn't do anything too miraculous, the Guilds wouldn't have strong objections to teaching her magic in order to help her cope with blindness.

That said, are you sure you want to play a blind girl? I want to offer this caution, disabilities are very serious things in Landry. You're setting Cassie up with a massive disadvantage which magic can help mitigate, but can not completely nullify. For instance, she won't be able to see auras like the other characters (would need a spell to help). Different, but still relevant, note is that healing her eyes won't be easy either – short of actually growing proper, working, eyes for her (by no means is this easy), not much'll do it.

Basically, think carefully about this decision. What does being blind add to this character? Is there a way to get to this result without the disadvantage represented by playing a blind girl? There's at least one way to work growing up as a blind girl, before a miraculous rebirth event. So, yeah, think carefully. I've no issue with it if you're sure, but I want you to understand the constraints this represents.

Oh, and I'd suggest dropping the part about her late enrollment. Her relationships won't develop overnight, you know. Plus, club-levels are nice.

I appreciate the advice. I see you already discussed this with Drac on the edupad and he managed to summarize my position pretty well.

Cassie's a character who really wants to have a thing she only rarely gets a taste of, and her parents didn't manage to assuage her curiosity (imagine you had a blind daughter and she asked you what seeing was like). If she got sight permanently, I imagine her excitement would be somewhat like a heroin addict's who gets to swim in a pile of heroin all day every day.

That's an exaggeration, of course. Cassie's had her whole life to get used to her condition, and hasn't quite worked up to desperate heroin addict levels yet. Maybe she never will.

I'll admit, I hadn't really considered the possibility of her sight being fixed throughout the course of the game. If it happens, it happens and we'll deal with it then. If an opportunity arises, she'll probably take it.

While I'm aware that playing a blind character means having a pretty severe handicap in combat, Cassie's concept is one I've kind of fallen in love with, so I'm sticking with it.

Now, here's an updated sheet with the changes you suggested. I also added a little bit to the Notes, Appearance and her relationship with Nate, and rewrote the Barbara relationship a little.

And I changed Borrow Sight to a Grade 1 spell as you suggested on the pad.

I didn't address any other spells you mentioned problems with on the pad because I want to wait till your next review for more in-depth observations, but I used the extra spell slot from Borrow Sight's degrading to add a club-inspired (or, more accurately, friend-inspired) buff spell. I realize the new spell might be a little too vague, though.

Name: Cassandra "Cassie" Hayden
Race: Human
Gender: Female
Aura: You can try to guess at your Aura color - but its probably best to leave this section to me. Its the sum of all your spell hues.
Age: 18
Appearance: 5'2'', average build, wavy pale blonde hair reaches halfway down her back, dusty blue eyes and caucasian. Her clothing is nothing special, usually jeans and a blouse. Except she always mismatches colors or wears odd outfits based on what's comfortable and not on what looks good. She wears sunglasses over her eyes when she goes out, and carries a white cane.

Spells:

Borrow Sight, Grade 1, ? Elemental
With this spell, Cassie can transfer her sight with someone else's. This is limited solely to body functions related to eyesight. She can open and close the other person's eyelids and move their eyes and see what they see, and the victim can do the same with her eyes (for all that's worth). While active, Cassie and the victim can hear each other's surface thoughts. This spell requires direct, skin-on-skin physical contact to activate, and ends when that contact is broken or Cassie consciously turns it off.

Proximity Sense/Battle Precognition, Compound Spell, ? Elemental
When activated, this spell allows Cassie to sense the shape and features of any object within five feet of her. In combat, she can also select one of the objects she's sensing, and for added Will drain, have a vision of what their next move will be.

Danger Sense, Grade 1, ? Elemental
This spell activates whenever something comes within a twenty feet radius of Cassie, intending to do her direct harm. She becomes suddenly aware that something dangerous is coming at her and the direction it's coming from.

Summon: Cane, Grade 1, ? Elemental
In the rare event she's not without it, Cassie can summon her cane into her hand.

Palm Reading, Grade 1, ? Elemental
Cassie often uses this spell as part of a "read your future through your palm" gag. In reality, she implants a simple, one-word suggestion into the mind of the victim, in Cassie's case often things like "flirt" or "drink", and lets their minds fill out the details. This spell requires direct, skin-on-skin contact.

Focus Boost, Grade 1, ? Elemental
With concentration and physical contact (not necessarily skin-on-skin), Cassie can cast this spell on a person, helping them focus on a task they put their mind to and ignore distractions.

Bio:
Cassie was born premature, and suffers from Retinopathy of Prematurity, a severe case which resulted in her being completely blind. Cassie's parents, both members of the Wizard's Guild, were somewhat overprotective of their daughter because of this. Her mother, a school teacher, got jobs at Cassie's school so she could keep an eye on her daughter. Though Cassie understood their concern, she harbored some resentment and wished she could see. Still, her parents didn't keep her sheltered, and Cassie led as full a life as she could.

Her parents awakened her at thirteen, and helped her develop her spells to make living with her blindness easier. They decided against sending her to a Wizarding Academy because those were too strict and rigid for someone like Cassie. Instead, they trained her for years, partly out of overprotectiveness, so she could go to Amaranth. Though Cassie's parents didn't stop her from going to public school and having a social life, her parents still worried about her magic and how she handled her blidness. Though Cassie loves them, she rebelled by against both her parents and her condition by fully embracing her social life.

Unbeknownst to her parents, Cassie became more and more obsessed with sight after the first incident, and developed a fairly active sex life with ulterior motives, telling her parents she was sleeping over with a friend. After her partners fell asleep, she would borrow their sight and just stare through their eyes all night. Most of them woudln't hook up with her again, due to weird dreams that creeped them out. Cassie finally enrolled in Amaranth when she turned eighteen.

Clubs:
Home Ec
Meditation
Strolling
Fencing (Saber)

Notes:
- Reads braille, contracted braille, and grade 3 braille.
- Weapon proficiency: Saber.
- Improvised weapon proficiency: Cassie's learned to wield her cane like a saber if the need arises, with a modified technique to compensate for the fact that it's not a bladed weapon.
- Information on her condition: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Retinopathy_of_prematurity

Relationships:
Timothy Hayden: Cassie's father, a member of the Wizard's Guild, who works as a real estate agent, and was a fencing champion in his youth. He still sees his daughter as a helpless little girl, much to her chagrin, though he tries to avoid that sort of thinking and let her take care of herself.

Jennie Hayden: Cassie's mother, also a member of the Wizard's Guild. She's a school teacher, and would take jobs at Cassie's schools, teaching Cassie's classes if she could, to keep an eye on her daughter. She shares her husband's views about Cassie.

Nate Adams: one of Cassie's friends, who attends his first year at Amaranth. A younger boy who has a hopeless crush on her. Cassie's aware, but doesn't return his affections and simply considers him a friend. He's a Black, and is in Fencing Club with her. He's something of a child prodigy, being younger than the usual admittance age in Amaranth and having good marks in all his classes.

Barbara Lane: Cassie's roommate and friend, and a first-year student at Amaranth. She's a spiritualist, and is often spacy and distracted, due to constantly listening to and sometimes conversing with spirits around her. This gives her trouble especially in Meditation and Home Ec clubs, where she sometimes ends up making messes and distracting other people, as well as appearing insane at times.

Daniel Hicks: Another first-year student, one of the best students in Fencing Club, and kind of a jerk. He has no problem teasing blind girls, but Cassie doesn't really care about him.

[Rhiya Ravenwing]

Originally Posted by Teal Mage

*snip*

Guardians of the House is approved. Fits fine. Both of your new spells need minor tweaks, but before I do more spell commentary, I'd like to note that, since Emme's a hybrid (good at martial combat and magic), seven spells to start is gonna be too much. Unless you wanna remove most of her martial fighting skills, five's the number that you'll be working with (pre-club levels, anyway). So, to help with deciding which spells to drop, here's a few new comments:

Upon a week's reflection, Helping Hand is too adaptable and complicated in its current iteration. If you want to keep it, it would be treated as a Flash Action - a different spell would be needed to lift something or wipe something down, etc. It might develop into an interesting specialization for Emme, but I don’t see this worth the spell slot initially. Nitpicker's Eyes is potentially nice, depending on the mechanic used for it, since that gives Emme more magical education to draw on for later skill-development. I would note that the ability seems a little like an extra for Emme right now and might not be worth the slot. Still, with a few clarification tweaks, it would be fine to keep.

I would recommend the Perception Surge over the other two, though, since it has the most direct combat applications. Well, if you make this a Surge and not a Mode-Shift, that is. The text of the ability suggests that the effect is sustained (Mode-Shift), which would come with the an 'inability to move while spell is active' drawback (she has to focus on watching her target to keep it working). That said, the Mode-Shift would would be easier on Emme's body to use than the Surge. The Surge, as implied, would active for an instant, and make Emme's ability to detect details extraordinarily great for that moment. The overall effect would be stronger than the Mode-Shift and could be activated while she's fighting for quick bursts of insight, but would be more taxing on her body (could damage her eyes if used too much). The Surge is also more expensive than the Mode-Shift (on a per-turn basis).

Regardless of your choice, you'll need to cut back on at least two of your spells. Club-levels come next.

Oh, and congrats, the Inconspicuous Maid spell is probably the strongest pseudo-invisible technique in the game, right now. The spell requires so many factors to activate (clothing, posture and intent), that the only way to detect Emme while the ability is active is to look for a Maid, while being suspicious of said Maid. The illusion doesn't work properly if Emme stops playing her part right, unfortunately (if she gets flustered or makes hurried motions, she might be noticed, for instance).

*mega-epic-snip*

Alright, let's have a look. I'm looking at getting rid of Nitpicker's Eyes, since yes it was a way-too-subtle extension of Emme's job as a Maid. To be honest after splitting the original spell into two, all I was really preferring was the perception surge (ok, so Mode-shift would mean she'd have to stand still to observe, and surge could be used in the midst of combat? I think Emme already has enough combat tricks and should probably use it as a mode-shift type spell for slow analysis).

Helping Hand was an extra flavour to Emme's 'skills' as Maid, but I can see where you're going with it. I'll get rid of it for simplicity sake. Instead, can I propose later learning it during her club activity (namely: Home Ec)? It can account for future character development as opposed to already starting with it. The same can be said for Nitpicker's Eyes, since the main use I intended it for was to notice the finer details Emme might've missed in the first observation. I'll throw in the edits now by striking out the spells (I won't be using them at all in the game, but they may be potentially 'unlocked' in the future?), or would you rather me just keep them in edupad to make my character sheet neater?

[Red Mage Black]

Glad you're feeling better, Teal. I can see why having the last of your humanity ripped from you is a minor surgery, since there wasn't much left of it in the first place. *rimshot*

Originally Posted by Teal Mage

Red:



I have no idea what this means. To be clear, what build are you aiming for with Nasir? Magic Focus, Martial Focus or Hybrid?

Might focus on magic for now and if he lasts long enough, try to branch off a little if I can figure out a way without crippling my spellcasting ability.

Right, I see I've complicated things too much. I'll fix that now: Nasir's Tribe is made of Humans not God-Bloods (we're dropping the family-specific blessings). Most rely on Old magic, Spirit magic or are the Priests of Gods. As Nasir is the Bearer of the Brand, the last option is out of his reach, but he can be trained in Old magic and/or Spirit magic. Nasir's family might still specialize in Weather and Wind magic, but this isn't an inborn talent or affinity. Its more of a tradition.

Anyway, Old magic either works off an incantation, or (in Nasir's case), an object covered with his tribe's Spell Script. For each option below, you'll need to decide if you want it to work based on an incantation, or an object. In the case of the latter option, you'll need to designate the object as well - each spell can only works with one object at Char. Gen. Objects, generally, do not expire when used.

Spirit magic is a wholly different kettle of fish. If I think it's a better route to accomplishing whatever the spell is after, I'll mention it. None of your present abilities strike me as suitable for this mechanic, though.

I would have gone with something like a desert shaman if I could have made it work, but I decided to avoid spirits all together since it's not like he could have brought them with him from the desert. For ones you said need an object, I'll list what, in my opinion, sounds suitable to me.

Healing Heart works fine, so does Staff Fighting Mastery. Warding off the Cold will either work as a Mode-Shift, or something that requires a fair Will Investment to activate. The latter option also requires him to touch the Brand to activate it. Decide which version you want, and we're good.

I'll go with the latter version, since it makes more sense in my head.

For Deny the Infidel, the spell'll work by creating a barrier of repelling force around Nasir. May not work on piercing attacks (not sure yet). To activate it, Nasir needs to stop moving and grip an object covered in the relevant spell-script. The Barrier fails if Nasir's focus is disrupted, he stops adding Will to the object, or he lets go of it. Fair Will drain, increases while opposing attacks. He can't breath while the barrier is up (it repels the air around him).

I suppose this could work with an incantation too, but it wouldn't be as useful.

Totally agree with that last statement, it sounded better on paper when I first wrote it. As for an object, since the staff is used for the staff fighting spell and the book for the healing spell, I'll suggest a string of small stones quite possibly tied to the staff itself where no other incantation is written.

Power of the Wind is a little more complicated. You're either looking at what amounts to a Wind-Beam (narrow blast of wind, about the size of his palm, mid-long range) which deals blunt damage. Best way to work that would be a short, one sentence, incantation with a gesture to direct the Beam, or to put Will into an object covered with his tribe's spell script, while touching it directly, and aiming it at the target. Both are Old Magic.

The alternative would be a blast of gale-force wind at melee-range (no direct damage, but might knock someone down to stagger them), directed in front of him. Again, Old Magic works best. Either touch an object covered with his tribe's spell script (no gesture required) and add Will, or shout a single word incantation. Your call.

Lets go with the melee range stagger/knockback then. The object idea was a piece of cloth wrapped around his hand, with the script written on the cloth within his palm. Of course, to prevent smudging, the script would be written in dye instead of ink, which I hope is possible to do in the first place.

Praise the Strong targets other people – it doesn't make sense for him to have kept this over the course of his two-year journey. Any battles he got in would be solo. Steady Footing is…a bit odd. It won't work well as a Yellow technique (improving your sense of balance won't help enough). Right now, it covers too many possible terrains for me to come up with a good mechanic to make it work – narrow down which difficult terrain you want this spell to work with, and I'll see what I can do.

First one I agree with. Forgot to take the whole journey into consideration. I'll work with... I'll say rocky terrain. Either mountainous or valley like, since I'm not entirely sure what it would be like between the Middle East and where he ventured.

MMA is more brawling than anything else. Really aggressive, no weapon-training involved. Meditation is the closest you'll get to a defensive weapon class and you already have it. I think picking a different club would be best.

As for clubs, I was looking through them. I'm still not fully decided on what would work. I was thinking Art at first, if based on the calligraphy style writing of Arabic. So, just Strolling Club then. Since I can't come up with anything else that would make sense.