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Unread 04-01-2011, 08:00 AM   #1
Professor Smarmiarty
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WTF They ruined a good title!

In this thread we take things with fantastic, yet misleading titles, and propose better alternatives.
Like
Black Gestapo:
What it actually is: Lame blacksploitation drama
What it should be: Black man sneaks into the gestapo, series of comic misadventures as his identity is nearly discovered by his bumbling commander. Final scene: he must play at the county jazz competition across town while also being present for the barracks inspectionary vist of Hitler at the same time, running between the two, forgetting to remove his uniform in one, his saxophone in the other. Comedy gold.

Blade Runner:
What it actually is: Hum-drum sci-fi
What it should be:In a world ravaged by war, guns are the only currency. Cold, impersonal killing machines stalk the landscape, gunning down all regardless of rank or class. But for one man, this is too far, one man dreams of honour, of carrying the price of suffering, of being a man. This man is the Blade Runner.

MoonRaker:
What it actually is: Second best bond movie, still shit
What it should be: Professor Lawrence Donovan is an ordinary man, he drives to work, he teaches class, he stops for a coffee on the way home. Until one day, his life, his career, his work in linguistic archaeology is turned upside down. What secrets did he discover? What is too frightening for us to say? Why is the government trying to stop him? Did General Franco use the works of Gaudi to hide secrets to his Nazi gold, hidden on the moon? Will they dig it up before air runs out?
Find out in MoonRaker!
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Unread 04-01-2011, 08:15 AM   #2
BitVyper
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Quote:
Blade Runner:
What it actually is: Hum-drum sci-fi
Fuck you.
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Awesome art be here.
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Unread 04-01-2011, 08:33 AM   #3
russianreversal
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Default Keeping a good thing going.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Smarty McBarrelpants View Post
What it actually is: Second best bond movie, still shit
Fu- wait.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Smarty McBarrelpants View Post
What it actually is: Second best bond movie
Fuck you.
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Unread 04-01-2011, 08:57 AM   #4
Amake
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Amake broke the dial off at twelve but is probably at infinity or something. Amake broke the dial off at twelve but is probably at infinity or something. Amake broke the dial off at twelve but is probably at infinity or something. Amake broke the dial off at twelve but is probably at infinity or something. Amake broke the dial off at twelve but is probably at infinity or something. Amake broke the dial off at twelve but is probably at infinity or something. Amake broke the dial off at twelve but is probably at infinity or something. Amake broke the dial off at twelve but is probably at infinity or something. Amake broke the dial off at twelve but is probably at infinity or something. Amake broke the dial off at twelve but is probably at infinity or something. Amake broke the dial off at twelve but is probably at infinity or something.
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I don't actually remember what Dark Arms was about, but I'm sure I like my version more.
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Unread 04-01-2011, 09:48 AM   #5
Professor Smarmiarty
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Quote:
Originally Posted by russianreversal View Post
Fu- wait.
Fuck you.
Guess what the best one is!Go on!It's Casino Royale- the original one


The Quick and the Dead:
What it actually is: Lame actiony-western
What it should be: Werewolves vs Zombies

Lost in Space:
What it actually is: Terrible campy movie/tv-show
What it should be: Lost in space
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Unread 04-01-2011, 10:04 AM   #6
Art of Hilt
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Blade Runner should have been a title about a movie of people who have an ice skating tournament, only it's in a futuristic sci-fi version of a Roman Coliseum, to the death, and there's no ice.
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Oh My! Mercy!
And maybe I seem a bit confused, yeah maybe, but I got you pegged!

But I don’t know what to do with those tossed salads and scrambled eggs.
They're calling again.
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Unread 04-01-2011, 10:09 AM   #7
Professor Smarmiarty
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Professor Smarmiarty isn't just above the law -- they are the law. Professor Smarmiarty isn't just above the law -- they are the law. Professor Smarmiarty isn't just above the law -- they are the law. Professor Smarmiarty isn't just above the law -- they are the law. Professor Smarmiarty isn't just above the law -- they are the law. Professor Smarmiarty isn't just above the law -- they are the law. Professor Smarmiarty isn't just above the law -- they are the law. Professor Smarmiarty isn't just above the law -- they are the law. Professor Smarmiarty isn't just above the law -- they are the law. Professor Smarmiarty isn't just above the law -- they are the law. Professor Smarmiarty isn't just above the law -- they are the law.
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No that's Blades of Glory.
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Unread 04-01-2011, 12:07 PM   #8
Sky Warrior Bob
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Smart McBarrelpants
What he actually is: Just an opinionated person on the internet, pretty much like everyone else
What he should be: An insane bunny, who is completelly obsessed with making everyone 'Do a Barrel Roll'

Sorry, but this world needs more insane bunnies. We've got pleny of opininonated ppl on the internet. Besides, the Timothy Dalton Bond flicks were the best.
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Last edited by Sky Warrior Bob; 04-01-2011 at 12:19 PM.
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Unread 04-01-2011, 12:37 PM   #9
russianreversal
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sky Warrior Bob View Post
Besides, the Timothy Dalton Bond flicks were the best.
Oh my god has everyone gone cra-

Oh wait it's April Fools. Good one, guys.

Good one.
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Unread 04-01-2011, 01:06 PM   #10
Professor Smarmiarty
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Professor Smarmiarty isn't just above the law -- they are the law. Professor Smarmiarty isn't just above the law -- they are the law. Professor Smarmiarty isn't just above the law -- they are the law. Professor Smarmiarty isn't just above the law -- they are the law. Professor Smarmiarty isn't just above the law -- they are the law. Professor Smarmiarty isn't just above the law -- they are the law. Professor Smarmiarty isn't just above the law -- they are the law. Professor Smarmiarty isn't just above the law -- they are the law. Professor Smarmiarty isn't just above the law -- they are the law. Professor Smarmiarty isn't just above the law -- they are the law. Professor Smarmiarty isn't just above the law -- they are the law.
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How is Moonraker not the best EON bond? Bond movies are about being ridiculously silly and just doing crazy shit- in no movie do they do more ridiculously silly and crazy shit than Moonraker.
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