Movies you hate

[RickZarber]

Hm. You know, I can't think of any movies that I outright hate! Sure, there's plenty that I wouldn't watch even if you paid me, but those are just things I don't like, or think are stupid.

I can't think of a single movie I've seen that's actually angered me because of how bad it was.

TV shows, on the other hand....

[Krylo]

I didn't have a problem with Equilibrium, to be honest. Gun Kata was just adding martial arts to standard ridiculous action movie stuff. What, you mean a guy can't actually disarm three men with guns with a rope tied to a horse shoe, or with his hands stuck in paint cans. I mean, I guess its attempt to explain it could have broken the suspension of disbelief that exists when John McClane beats up five terrorists with semi-automatic military assault rifles while walking on broken glass in bare feet, but that just seems silly to me. I guess I just have trouble accepting that people find gunkata too unrealistic when blowing up a helicopter by ramping a car off a piece of cement is apparently totally realism to the super max.

The insurgents at the end were kind of weak (did they run out of the fake gunfire budget or something?), but if you were watching Equilibrium for any reason that didn't involve parrying guns with guns you were watching it for the wrong reason.


ON TOPIC: Star Wars. Episode 2, Episode 3*, and the remastered version of the original trilogy.

George Lucas should not be allowed to touch his own intellectual property. Ever.

Also Transformers. Shakey Cam + overly complicated and samey designs + wrestling = wtf is even going on I don't know who is winning or if that's a punch or just a piston moving in his arm fuck you Michael Bay.

Oh and then there's basically every video game movie that isn't Super Mario Brothers (which was so terrible it cycled right back around into amazing, right down to George Clinton's Walk the Dinosaur) or an animu.

*Episode 1 gets a pass because it gave us the Obi-Wan's bad joke and Qui-Gon Jin: Worst Jedi Ever youtubes.

[Professor Smarmiarty]

Every Cohen brothers movie ever made. When my favourite director is Jamusch whose entire career has basically been built around nothing happening and I find your films dull and insipid you have a major problem.

[Ryong]

Wolf Creek. Everything that happened in the movie didn't matter at all. Thie killer is still free and they arrested some innocents who were telling the truth and then got screwed.

I'm trying to remember more, but somehow, can't.

[CelesJessa]

The only movie I can remember actively disliking would be Epic Movie. I wanted my money back after seeing it, even though I had gotten in for free.

[Archbio]

Originally Posted by Krylo

I guess I just have trouble accepting that people find gunkata too unrealistic when blowing up a helicopter by ramping a car off a piece of cement is apparently totally realism to the super max.

I think people's reasoning was more "gunkata is unrealistic, is explained in a way that sound stupid, and looks stupid; while carfu is unrealistic, isn't explained at all except with a wink, and looks super bold."

I mean, personally I hated Die Hardest as much as anyone, but clearly the issue people had with Gunkata is mostly one of esthetics, even though it might be expressed as "realism." And Die Hardest probably has never, ever, ever been described as "realistic to the max" by anyone.

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I think the biggest of the Star Wars Prequels many sins is its misuse of CGI sets. Those movies make it very hard to forget that the actors are always moving in the same very limited space, since the direction never works at giving the impression of movement. Who cars what awesome looking architecture you threw on the backdrop, if the actors are never allowed to sell it?

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Did I say I really hate The Strangers?

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Originally Posted by SMB

Every Cohen brothers movie ever made.

"Shut the fuck up, Donny."

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SMBP: The Movie. Starring Russel Crowe as SMBP, and a pile of rocks with quirky mannerisms as Jim Jarmusch.

[Krylo]

Originally Posted by Archbio

I think people's reasoning was more "gunkata is unrealistic, is explained in a way that sound stupid, and looks stupid; while carfu is unrealistic, isn't explained at all except with a wink*, and looks super bold."

I mean, personally I hated Die Hardest as much as anyone, but clearly the issue people had with Gunkata is mostly one of esthetics, even though it might be expressed as "realism." And Die Hardest probably has never, ever, ever been described as "realistic to the max" by anyone.

Disliking it aesthetically is fine, but disliking it because it's unrealistic and stupid and then going to Live Free and Die Hard and only complaining about the sidekick is... welp.

Or even liking the earlier Die Hards which may not have had as visually stunning a lack of realism, but had just as much all the same. Same with every action movie ever.

Personally I thought the aesthetics were mostly pretty sharp, particularly in the last few fight scenes and given the lack of budget the movie actually had. It was, of course, completely unrealistic right down the the grammaton symbol gun flares. But it used the cinematography and fight scenes to create an over all excellent aesthetic piece, from the final fight scene to tearing away the filter on his window to watch the sun set over the city.

Like I said, however, I'm okay with a difference of opinion on the aesthetic appeal of it. What I'm not so okay with is the insistence that it's stupid because it's not realistic from people that watch equally (or more!) unrealistic shows without so much as a blink.

I think the biggest of the Star Wars Prequels many sins is its misuse of CGI sets. Those movies make it very hard to forget that the actors are always moving in the same very limited space, since the direction never works at giving the impression of movement. Who cars what awesome looking architecture you threw on the backdrop, if the actors are never allowed to sell it?

My personal greatest problem is with the terrible dialogue. I don't care if you are the greatest actor/actress in the world, there is no way you are making that terrible dialogue between Anakin and Padme sound decent.

Which, of course, lead to the wooden acting in a lot of their scenes, which of course lead to the entire dynamic of their relationship, which is supposed to be the driving force behind much of the movies, feeling fake... and leaving many people completely unable to identify with it.

Though I guess they did have Mace Windu. Points there.


*Though, admittedly, the explaining it with little more than a wink to how unrealistic it is comes off as tongue in cheek in this exact instance, but it was less the specific instance that was the point, so much as that unrealistic action scenes are a defining trope of the genre.

[Fifthfiend]

Sex and the City 2

I didn't have a problem with Equilibrium, to be honest. Gun Kata was just adding martial arts to standard ridiculous action movie stuff. What, you mean a guy can't actually disarm three men with guns with a rope tied to a horse shoe, or with his hands stuck in paint cans. I mean, I guess its attempt to explain it could have broken the suspension of disbelief that exists when John McClane beats up five terrorists with semi-automatic military assault rifles while walking on broken glass in bare feet, but that just seems silly to me.

Things we learn from this post:

Krylo never watched Die Hard.

[Osterbaum]

Sex and the City 2

Sometimes I see the movie in my dreams playing the part of a rapist seeking to violate me. I'm afraid of it.

[Archbio]

Originally Posted by Krylo

Disliking it aesthetically is fine, but disliking it because it's unrealistic and stupid and then going to Live Free and Die Hard and only complaining about the sidekick is... welp.

I don't think that you've understood my point. Saying it's unrealistic is shorthand for saying it's unrealistic in a stupid way esthetically. If something is "unrealistic" (whatever realistic means this week) and it works people aren't going to say anything, because it will have looked real to them.

Gunkata looks stupid, is played without self awareness (as far as I recall) and is explained seriously all while being preposterous. It calls attention to its unrealism. That might be what they mean.