Star Trek/Transformers Fanfic!

oddly · 08-13-2005, 01:07 AM

"Picard to away team, report."
"Energon here, we seem to have run into my arch enemy... Megatron!! Permission to kick his ass?"
"I'm afraid I can't allow that, old friend."
Energon frowns (which must be hard for a robot). "Whaddya mean I can't kick his ass?! We've got him out-numbered and out-gunned (surprisingly)!"
"Because, Energon," Picard said. "I can't allow you to kill my own creation!"
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Energon yells.
Picard turned off the view screen. "Data, I need you to somehow launch an EMP or some kind of Photonic blast which will disable all those damnable robots down there. Before we have World War III on our hands!"
"Um, sir?" Data said. "World War III happened 700 years ago. It was on all the news, y'know? CNN did some special on it for a decade after the war was over."
Picard furrowed his brow. "And the ratings were through the rough. I remember now."
Data stared at Picard. "How could you remember? You're only 67."
"No, Data, my friend, I'm not 67. In fact, I've been living a complete lie. For you see, I am Jean Luc Picard the VAMPIRE!!"
Data then faints because he is a pansy whom I do not like.
"Perfect," Picard said. "Now I can drain him of his blood. And the rest of his bodily fluids. It's not like he will be needing them."
"Um... sir? We all just saw what you did and have a stake ready." Worf said, tapping Picard on the back.
"Ah yes, dinner. That's alright, Lieutenant Worf. As you can see I'm already eating."
"Not a steak, as in part of a cow. A wooden stake. With which to stab you in the heart."
Picard wiped the blood (among other fluids) off of his chin. "Oh. Right. So I'm guessing you'll be killing me then?"
"Right."
"If you must, just make sure you launch that EMP thingy or whatever bef- AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH!!!"
"Blech. What a mess," Worf said, pressing the button to do whatever Picard had said.
Then all the Transformer robots malfunctioned and needed to be rebooted (though no one did).

THE END?! Yeah, probably.

InvaderKrag · 08-13-2005, 01:29 AM

I'm quite speechless. All I can say for you, sir, is.....

"It is a good day to...di - ....be flamed." - Worf. Sort of.

jk, jk...you'd probably be idolized on ff.net.

oddly · 08-13-2005, 01:30 AM

Awww. I'd rather be flamed than idolized. Oh well, maybe next time.

Carnivore · 08-13-2005, 01:35 AM

Wait, Data was an android, he didn't HAVE bodily fluids.

oddly · 08-13-2005, 01:37 AM

He does now. Listen, I've barely even watched 10 minutes of the show ever. And if anyone asks, I did it because I'm a Sorcerer Level 1.

Staizer · 08-13-2005, 01:38 AM

well, battery fluids yes, but I don't think a vampire would like those much

"Why does this blood burn!?"

EVILNess · 08-13-2005, 01:38 AM

Quote:

Wait, Data was an android, he didn't HAVE bodily fluids.

Or did he?

DUM DUM DUUUUM!

oddly · 08-13-2005, 01:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Staizer

well, battery fluids yes, but I don't think a vampire would like those much

"Why does this blood burn!?"

Picard did enjoy it, he said it tasted like cotton candy.

Quote:

Originally Posted by EVILNess

Quote:

Wait, Data was an android, he didn't HAVE bodily fluids.

Or did he?

DUM DUM DUUUUM!

I concur.

Toe Nibbler · 08-13-2005, 02:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Staizer
well, battery fluids yes, but I don't think a vampire would like those much

"Why does this blood burn!?"

Picard did enjoy it, he said it tasted like cotton candy.

Quote:

Originally Posted by EVILNess
Quote:
Wait, Data was an android, he didn't HAVE bodily fluids.

Or did he?

DUM DUM DUUUUM!

I concur.

Heehehehehehhehee.. I have de most quotes... But why do you hate Data so much? He's the coolest person on Star Trek.. By far. And I still think Shockwave wouldn't stand for no EMP. He'd bust out some pwnage. And Starscream's whiney voice would shatter the windows on the U.S.S. Enterprise... Robots CAN scream in space... Then, after teh windows were broken, and all the non transformers were dead, Megatron would turn into a suggestively small gun(Compared to his actual size) and Star scream would do it with him, and they become one uber transformer, and they'd rock the world. Then Shockwave's little mini bots would finish everything off. But Mirage would hide away from all that, and after it was all done, he'd hunt down the decepticons and kill them one by one predator style.

EDIT:If someone made a predator RP, I'd sure as heckfire join it.
RE-EDIT:Oops..I used a dirty dirty word. I didn't mean heckfire, I meant sugar.

Meister · 08-13-2005, 02:51 AM

Can you imagine a transforming enterprise though? Or, screw that, how about a transforming Borg race? The possibilities are endless.

08-13-2005, 01:07 AM	#1
oddly Sorcerer Level 1 Join Date: Aug 2005 Posts: 43	Star Trek/Transformers Fanfic! "Picard to away team, report." "Energon here, we seem to have run into my arch enemy... Megatron!! Permission to kick his ass?" "I'm afraid I can't allow that, old friend." Energon frowns (which must be hard for a robot). "Whaddya mean I can't kick his ass?! We've got him out-numbered and out-gunned (surprisingly)!" "Because, Energon," Picard said. "I can't allow you to kill my own creation!" "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Energon yells. Picard turned off the view screen. "Data, I need you to somehow launch an EMP or some kind of Photonic blast which will disable all those damnable robots down there. Before we have World War III on our hands!" "Um, sir?" Data said. "World War III happened 700 years ago. It was on all the news, y'know? CNN did some special on it for a decade after the war was over." Picard furrowed his brow. "And the ratings were through the rough. I remember now." Data stared at Picard. "How could you remember? You're only 67." "No, Data, my friend, I'm not 67. In fact, I've been living a complete lie. For you see, I am Jean Luc Picard the VAMPIRE!!" Data then faints because he is a pansy whom I do not like. "Perfect," Picard said. "Now I can drain him of his blood. And the rest of his bodily fluids. It's not like he will be needing them." "Um... sir? We all just saw what you did and have a stake ready." Worf said, tapping Picard on the back. "Ah yes, dinner. That's alright, Lieutenant Worf. As you can see I'm already eating." "Not a steak, as in part of a cow. A wooden stake. With which to stab you in the heart." Picard wiped the blood (among other fluids) off of his chin. "Oh. Right. So I'm guessing you'll be killing me then?" "Right." "If you must, just make sure you launch that EMP thingy or whatever bef- AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH!!!" "Blech. What a mess," Worf said, pressing the button to do whatever Picard had said. Then all the Transformer robots malfunctioned and needed to be rebooted (though no one did). THE END?! Yeah, probably.

08-13-2005, 01:29 AM	#2
InvaderKrag Wannabe Sprite-Comic-er Join Date: Aug 2005 Posts: 104	I'm quite speechless. All I can say for you, sir, is..... "It is a good day to...di - ....be flamed." - Worf. Sort of. jk, jk...you'd probably be idolized on ff.net. __________________ Visit my sprite comic, Chronic Stupidity! I'll sue you if you don't. Before you ask, yes, I can do that. Now entering its second, and hopefully more permanent incarnation!

08-13-2005, 01:35 AM	#4
Carnivore Skank Join Date: Jun 2004 Posts: 480	Wait, Data was an android, he didn't HAVE bodily fluids. __________________ I mean, look at you. You don't even have a name tag. You've got no chance. Why don't you just fall down?

08-13-2005, 01:30 AM	#3
oddly Sorcerer Level 1 Join Date: Aug 2005 Posts: 43	Awww. I'd rather be flamed than idolized. Oh well, maybe next time.

08-13-2005, 01:37 AM	#5
oddly Sorcerer Level 1 Join Date: Aug 2005 Posts: 43	He does now. Listen, I've barely even watched 10 minutes of the show ever. And if anyone asks, I did it because I'm a Sorcerer Level 1.

08-13-2005, 02:51 AM	#10
Meister Pure joy Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Germany Posts: 10,689	Can you imagine a transforming enterprise though? Or, screw that, how about a transforming Borg race? The possibilities are endless.