MASS EFFECT FUCK SHIT WHHAAAGGHH

DFM · 11-19-2007, 03:42 PM

Okay so Bioware's making a new 360 exclusive RPG called Mass Effect maybe you've heard about it I dunno. It seems a lot like KotoR with their own independent IP and maybe some moral dilemmas and responses beyond either saving a kitten stuck in a tree or raping it.

And you've got this motherfucking monster truck speed boat you ride around in and you can shoot shit with it it's like Master Blaster only badass and from the future.

And your character actually fucking talks in this game I mean they've got a voice actor and everything and you can interrupt conversations by sticking a fucking space gun in a space stripper's face when she won't shut up about wanting you to clear the cargo holds of a rat infestation. Speaking of space strippers there's going to be space sex and space titties and I mean everyone likes titties even gay guys. Especially space titties because those are like arguably alive and probably have like AI microchips in them or some shit.

Also apparently in this universe aliens fucking suck shit and humans have to hold their hand and do everything for them because they're too fucking dumb to figure out how to make a quantum flux capacitor that isn't the size of the goddamn Metrodome.

Fucking look at those floating tentacles in the background holy shit they must deal with all kinds of fucking racial profiling. I know I wouldn't let them on my ship except maybe on the sushi bar. That joke doesn't really work because I don't think they're fish and I'm pretty sure the Japanese and their culture is going to be extinct by whatever space-time Mass Effect takes place in.

It's released tomorrow on the Twentieth of November 2007! I'm so fucking excited I shot my dog and beat my kid sister to death with a half broken muffler this is going to rock so fucking hardcore.

There's a review on Game Trailers right now that I'm about to watch. I'll be back in a bit to either tell you how awesome it is or that Game Trailers are a bunch of fucking hacks who need to pull their heads from their assholes.

MASS EFFECT

Seil · 11-19-2007, 03:47 PM

I think that it looks neat, too.

42PETUNIAS · 11-19-2007, 03:47 PM

DFM seems to be pretty easily excitable.

Regulus Tera · 11-19-2007, 03:49 PM

The facial hair and real time conversations impress me, but God damn me if those aren't some uncanny valley models (the human ones).

Tendronai · 11-19-2007, 03:54 PM

Barring something screwing up, I'm going to get this tomorrow.

Quote:

I'm so fucking excited I shot my dog and beat my kid sister to death with a half broken muffler this is going to rock so fucking hardcore.

Completely appropriate given what we're waiting for.

DFM · 11-19-2007, 04:15 PM

Gametrailers review is pretty good guys.

"Celestial Sea of Awesomeness."

ArlanKels · 11-19-2007, 05:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Regulus Tera

The facial hair and real time conversations impress me, but God damn me if those aren't some uncanny valley models (the human ones).

I think it's funny that people are, at some subconcious level, disturbed by human looking people who don't look 100% human.

phil_ · 11-19-2007, 05:09 PM

I'm not disturbed by the Mass Effect guy or the quizzical woman beside him. Perhaps I'm an AI in disguise, and these things are normal to me?

No, no that's not it. The graphics are pretty though, judging from those screen shots. Too bad I don't have a 360 and I haven't really been following Bioware's endeavors since I gave up the Dragon Age pre-pre-pre-game boards for NPF.

bananarama · 11-19-2007, 05:18 PM

I have a 360... but I can't get this game for a while ;_; So yeah even on the extremely unlikely chance that Mass Effect is underwhelming or something, at least you guys can take pleasure at the thought that bananarama still hasn't finished a shit load of games yet and he is depressed that he can't get this

....

Mirai Gen · 11-19-2007, 05:23 PM

When I finish Assassin's Creed I'm all over this shit. Like flies.

11-19-2007, 03:42 PM	#1
DFM Om Nom Nom Join Date: Sep 2005 Posts: 3,850	MASS EFFECT FUCK SHIT WHHAAAGGHH Okay so Bioware's making a new 360 exclusive RPG called Mass Effect maybe you've heard about it I dunno. It seems a lot like KotoR with their own independent IP and maybe some moral dilemmas and responses beyond either saving a kitten stuck in a tree or raping it. And you've got this motherfucking monster truck speed boat you ride around in and you can shoot shit with it it's like Master Blaster only badass and from the future. And your character actually fucking talks in this game I mean they've got a voice actor and everything and you can interrupt conversations by sticking a fucking space gun in a space stripper's face when she won't shut up about wanting you to clear the cargo holds of a rat infestation. Speaking of space strippers there's going to be space sex and space titties and I mean everyone likes titties even gay guys. Especially space titties because those are like arguably alive and probably have like AI microchips in them or some shit. Also apparently in this universe aliens fucking suck shit and humans have to hold their hand and do everything for them because they're too fucking dumb to figure out how to make a quantum flux capacitor that isn't the size of the goddamn Metrodome. Fucking look at those floating tentacles in the background holy shit they must deal with all kinds of fucking racial profiling. I know I wouldn't let them on my ship except maybe on the sushi bar. That joke doesn't really work because I don't think they're fish and I'm pretty sure the Japanese and their culture is going to be extinct by whatever space-time Mass Effect takes place in. It's released tomorrow on the Twentieth of November 2007! I'm so fucking excited I shot my dog and beat my kid sister to death with a half broken muffler this is going to rock so fucking hardcore. There's a review on Game Trailers right now that I'm about to watch. I'll be back in a bit to either tell you how awesome it is or that Game Trailers are a bunch of fucking hacks who need to pull their heads from their assholes. MASS EFFECT __________________ [14:26] ManoftheRus: YOU GODDAMN SNEAKY DEE

11-19-2007, 03:47 PM	#3
42PETUNIAS helloooo! Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: The Court Posts: 2,816	DFM seems to be pretty easily excitable. __________________ noooo! why are you doing that?!

11-19-2007, 04:15 PM	#6
DFM Om Nom Nom Join Date: Sep 2005 Posts: 3,850	Gametrailers review is pretty good guys. "Celestial Sea of Awesomeness." __________________ [14:26] ManoftheRus: YOU GODDAMN SNEAKY DEE Last edited by DFM; 11-19-2007 at 04:45 PM.

11-19-2007, 05:09 PM	#8
phil_ Just sleeping Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: At home, probably in bed. Posts: 6,482	I'm not disturbed by the Mass Effect guy or the quizzical woman beside him. Perhaps I'm an AI in disguise, and these things are normal to me? No, no that's not it. The graphics are pretty though, judging from those screen shots. Too bad I don't have a 360 and I haven't really been following Bioware's endeavors since I gave up the Dragon Age pre-pre-pre-game boards for NPF. __________________ Be T-Rexcellent to each other, tako.

11-19-2007, 05:23 PM	#10
Mirai Gen We are Geth. Join Date: Nov 2003 Posts: 14,032	When I finish Assassin's Creed I'm all over this shit. Like flies. __________________

11-19-2007, 03:47 PM	#2
Seil Super stressed! Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: British Columbia Posts: 8,081	I think that it looks neat, too.

11-19-2007, 03:49 PM	#4
Regulus Tera lol i dont even know Join Date: Dec 2004 Posts: 7,271	The facial hair and real time conversations impress me, but God damn me if those aren't some uncanny valley models (the human ones).

11-19-2007, 05:18 PM	#9
bananarama Old Gregg Join Date: Jul 2006 Posts: 2,189	I have a 360... but I can't get this game for a while ;_; So yeah even on the extremely unlikely chance that Mass Effect is underwhelming or something, at least you guys can take pleasure at the thought that bananarama still hasn't finished a shit load of games yet and he is depressed that he can't get this ....