Solid Snake's Pseudo-Let's Play: Mass Effect

[Solid Snake]

Solid Snake's Annual Bioware Pseudo-Let's Play Topic: Mass Effect Edition

Last year, it was KOTOR. Now, brave cadets, let us venture into a new imagining of the Milky Way universe, complete with crazy looking ailens, biotics, hot Brazilian chicks (who nonetheless have the last name "Williams"), Carth Onasi clones, starships named after D-Day beaches, badasses named after a doctor on LOST, and 21st century weapons (because sniper rifles and shotguns apparently never go out of style.)
Yes, it's my first playthrough of Mass Effect! And it's the perfect time for a Pseudo-Let's Play topic.

Q: Snake, what do you mean by "Pseudo Let's Play?"

A: I mean that, since this is my very first playthrough of the game, I won't let you make every desicion. The fact that y'all won't dictate every feasible decision is ameliorated by the facts that you'll still have the opportunity to make some critical decisions for me, and oh, you'll also get the same jolt of awesomenessity y'all got from the KOTOR thread last summer: namely, I'll be making tons of comments as I play through the game for the first time, and you can all snicker at me, as you'll know exactly what's going to happen next. (I'll also be sure to share crazy theories that can't possibly be true. And I'll be sure to grovel for advice as necessary.)

Q: Snake, this topic doesn't have as many screenshots as a Let's Play topic should!

A: I find the obessive compulsive necessity to document every single action in a screenshot a bit distracting, particularly in a first playthrough. So instead of taking up tons of unnecessary space, I'll only be taking a few critical screenshots at critical moments.
Generally speaking, screenshots will only happen during gameplay (so that I don't risk missing crucial information in a cutscene.) The exception to this rule is that I should be able to screenshot those moments in a dialogue tree when the action stops and Shepard's supposed to be making a decision. Also, if a screenshot already exists of a critical cutscene somewhere on the net, I'll probably just resize it and post it here as opposed to marring my own playthrough.

Q: Snake, can you give us some examples of decisions you'll only make yourself, versus examples of decisions you'll let us make?

Sure, but remember that I haven't played the game yet, so I can't make any judgment on any future decisions made after the events I've already seen (intro on the Normandy and a portion of Eden Prime.)
I'll decide: Anything that's critically important for me in a first playthrough. For example, I have no interest in playing an Engineer, so though I will let you choose a character class for my character, Engineer will be off the table, as will Sentinel and Infiltrator (I'm not a skilled sniper, as anyone who's played with me in Team Fortress 2 would already know.)
Another example: I really want the character in my first playthrough to be male, so that's not a choice you'll get to make. I'll be choosing his name too, if only because "Snake Shepard" just sounds badass. (Okay, maybe it won't be 'Snake Shepard.' I still haven't decided.)
I'll also probably decide which character to seduce because I'm an ass like that.
You'll decide: Nearly everything else that's worth deciding. If Mass Effect actually has a semblence of non-linearity, you'll choose which quests I do and the order I do the quests in. You'll have at least some degree of choice regarding which characters tag along for the ride (I reserve the right, however, to eliminate characters I avidly dislike from the list of possibilities, but I'll always give you several possible choices.) You'll choose whether Shepard goes Renegade or Paragon or some combination of both. I can't guarantee you'll make the choices for every single dialogue stem (that'd get pretty ridiculous), but choices that reek of obvious importance are all yours.

The stipulations: In exchange for making these choices, I'd really just appreciate one thing: when you posit your arguments for "choice A" over "choice B" in the topic, keep spoilers spoiler-tagged and blacked out. I won't forbid you from posting spoilers in an attempt to convince other readers into voting a certain way or as a justification for your vote, but I will ask you to make absolutely sure it's invisible so I don't read it and ruin the game for myself.

There's a few tidbits of Mass Effect information I already know based on a couple mini-FAQs I read (I can tell you the names of all the squadmate characters as well as the romantic possibilities for male and female playthroughs, for example) so don't worry about spoiling incidental information. I don't want the major elements of the plotline or any major character secrets spoiled, but saying "you'll get X Sniper Rifle if you go to planet Z" or "choose option A if you want to continue seducing character B" in regular white text won't bother me.

Exception to the above spoiler rule: If I ask straight up for an answer to a question that requires revealing a relatively minor spoiler? Go right ahead. I can't be an ass about it if I (literally) asked for it.

Q: What's this about some people's votes counting twice as much? How is that fair?
A: It is. Sort of. It's an old rule I used in a Let's Play topic at GameFAQs a while back and it led to a better playthrough so I've kept the relic.
The idea is simple: your vote counts twice as much (2 instead of 1) if you bother to justify it. It doesn't matter whether the justification for your vote is a sentence long or three paragraphs long, so long as it's a justification that actually in some way addresses the question. (A justification that doesn't work: "I like the color green, so let's have Shepard knock out the scientist.")
This is just my subtle way of encouraging you to actually think about the choices we're making, and to favor the value of the votes of those who actually really love Mass Effect and clearly put two brain cells together to come up with ideas to make my first playthrough better.
One last NOTE: You can still justify a vote even if you've never actually played Mass Effect yourself. It's not a matter of knowing the game, it's just a matter of reading the questions and justifying your answers, and you can probably do that just by reading through the thread.

Q: What happens in the event of a tie?
A: I kind of have limited timeframes in my daily routines to play Mass Effect so I can't just wait for a tie to be broken. I'll never stop a poll less than eight hours after I've opened it, but anytime after eight hours of the post is fair game. If it's a tie, I'll break the tie based on my gut intuition.

On to the fun decisions! It's CHARACTER SELECTION TIME!!!!

I'll be deciding the appearance of my character, (I'll be sure to show you a screenshot next update. If I do name the character "Snake" I'm going to try to make him resemble MGS1 or MGS2's Solid Snake as much as possible) Also: I'm deciding the character's first name (possibly Snake, maybe not) and the character's gender (Male.)

What do you get to decide?
Everything else.

QUESTION ONE: Our Pre-Service History. Are we:
A: Earthborn,
B: Spacer,
or C: Colonist?

Earthborn: You were an orphan raised on the streets of the great megatropolises covering Earth. You escaped a life of petty crime and underworld gangs by enlisting with the Alliance military when you turned 18.
Spacer: Both of your parents were in the Alliance military. Your childhood was spent on ships and stations as they transferred from posting to posting, never staying in one location for more than a few years. Following your parents' footsteps, you enlisted at the age of 18.
Colonist: You were born and raised on Mindoir, a small border colony in the Attican Traverse. When you were 16, slavers raided Mindoir and slaughtered your family and friends. You were saved by a passing Alliance patrol, and you enlisted in the military a few years later.

QUESTION TWO: Our Psychological Profile. Are we:
A: Sole Survivor,
B: War Hero,
or C: Ruthless?

Sole Survivor: During your service, a mission you were on went horribly wrong. Trapped in an extreme survival situation, you had to overcome physical torments and psychological stresses that would have broken most people. You survived while all those around you fell, and now you alone are left to tell the tale.
War Hero: Early in your military career you found yourself facing an overwhelming enemy force. You risked your own life to save your fellow soldiers and defeat the enemy despite the impossible odds. Your bravery and heroism have earned you medals and recognition from the Alliance fleet.
Ruthless: Throughout your military career, you have held fast to one basic rule: Get the job done. You've been called cold, calculating, and brutal. Your reputation for ruthless efficiency makes your fellow soldiers wary of you. But when failure is not an option, the military always goes to you first.

QUESTION THREE: Our Military Specialization. Are we:
A: A Soldier,
B: A Vanguard,
or C: An Adept?

No official writeups here, but let me try my best:
Soldier: Can use any weapon in the game, best HP, attack, and defense, basically a walking tank. Mass Effect's version of 8Bit's Fighter.
Vanguard: Shotgun and pistol specialization only for weapons, but has some limited Biotics use. Mass Effect's version of 8Bit's jack-of-all-trades Red Mage.
Adept: Pistols only for weapons. Mage who casts lots of spells. Okay, technically it's Biotics and apparently Biotics don't do any damage, so this is like a really nerfed Black Mage.


Vote away...

[Kim]

A, C, and A...

Be a xenophobic, hate-filled badass... The way mother nature intended.

[01d55]

I vote colonist, sole survivor, and soldier.

While Ruthless is clearly a bonus to renegade (which I like because playing an asshole is always at least a little funny) sole survivor opens up a ton of traumatic experience jokes for you to stick in. The Colonist back story reinforces this, and opens up Batman jokes (i.e. "My parents are dead!")

[Kerensky287]

C, C, and C. Sure, Biotics do no damage on their own, but they're SO cool to look at.

By the way, how are you going to get screenshots?

[Solid Snake]

Originally Posted by Kerensky287

By the way, how are you going to get screenshots?

I own the PC version of Mass Effect, which will make the process a lot easier.
I could use Irfanview, I guess.

[Krylo]

First: Earthborn. If memory serves that's the one that sets you more toward renegade, and renegade is a million times more fun.

Second: Ruthless. People talk about how you gunned down slavers as they surrendered. Totally bad ass. Also extra renegade points to start, and, again, renegade=awesome.

Third: Adept. Get marksman and throw out lifts and/or singularities and warps? EVERYTHING DIES. Just learn to use cover and you won't even miss the heavy armor, though, with the biotics, you will, ironically, need cover less often than the soldier once you learn what you're doing. And seriously, pistols > all, with the possible exception of Spectre Master Gear Shotgun. Also, use each biotic ability 75 times, and you can select it as a bonus skill for your next character (adding biotics onto... say... a soldier).

[Zakreon]

Earthborn
Ruthless
Adept

Krylo's suggestions are totally awesome.

[Solid Snake]

I'm gonna be starting the game up in about six hours, so make your recommendations now while ya can, y'alls.

[Kaneda]

Earthborn Ruthless Soldier

I never played Mass Effect, but that combination seems relatively badass.

[Azisien]

I'm gonna vote Ruthless Earthborn Adept as well, if only because I prefer that choice to the run of the mill Soldier. Yay, a billion screenshots of Titty Shepard shooting a gun.